Stone Cold Scorpio Bitch

Houston, I have so many problems

[existennialmemes]

[scrolling social media] Who the fuck is Jimothy?

[a brief internet search later] Ahh yes, ok I understand. Jimothy is my religion now.

[trochaic-mutant-ninja-tetrameter]

[beardedmrbean]

[coldestcaress]

Fuckin Phantom of the Dive Bar here

[yourtwistedprincess]

Zooming in on your nudes so I can see what's on your bookshelf

[valentinetheeviljester]

Maybe lean out

[valentinetheeviljester]

[yellow-cat]

when i was but a wee babe the wet nurse accidentally dropped a sufferingberry into my open mouth and thats how this all got started

[manuelmoncayo]

Marc 2026 dreamsasreality by Manuel Moncayo

[waterandsilver]

crazy how the printer is the only piece of tech that acts up like that almost every day of its life. and we just accept it

[waterandsilver]

i don't think i've ever met a printer that actually wanted to be a printer. i think most printers have dreams of being on the stage

[wykart]

what do you mean my disability disables my abilities? what the fuck

[anglaised]

it is so annoying being so self aware about all my issues like okay what now girl

[ofchaosgoddess]

help I’m having ideas beyond my available free time

[nothereforthedrama]

help I'm having ideas beyond my available energy levels

[greater-than-the-sword]

My toxic trait is that if I find a product I like I want to keep using the same product forever. It's not even brand loyalty. It's called stop changing and discontinuing everything.

[anarqueeen]

Got thrown out of the tarot reading for counting cards. fuck this place

[memewhore]

[wewontbesleeping]

I love a snack that’s also a little bit of an activity. peeling a clementine, stringing a cheese, roasting marshmallows, stuff like that. eating a pomegranate is like a game of sudoku to me.

[depechemode-comments]