what i want to see in the x-files season 11
scully becomes two whole feet taller and no explanation is offered as to why
the writer’s room consists of 13 women and one genderless and non-human entity plucked straight from a bog in louisiana
at some point within the series fox mulder must disarm some kind of highly destructive device by learning how to use the service known as venmo
agent doggett returns with an elderly black labrador companion who adds nothing to the plot but who becomes scully’s new friend
monica reyes is free and also so so gay
scully is or is not wearing a wig but regardlessly her hair is a light shade of lavender
mulder develops a liking for strange hats
scully purchases a prius with a built-in navigation system
we see at least one cooking disaster. at least one
mulder starts a group text with his cryptid friends but unfortunately the mothman has an android while everyone else has iphones so they can’t all just imessage
william is there and throughout the series he only wears salmon-colored shorts
chris carter makes a cameo as Old Man Yells At Cloud
scully is given an opportunity to subdue many evil spirits but only through her singing voice, and as a result, mulder must pester her into singing while she insists that she absolutely will not
scully gifts mulder an ugly tie for his birthday, complete with a note that says “just like old times!” and for the rest of the episode mulder weeps, as does the audience, while clutching it
at least once per episode mulder must call “dagOO?”
mulder and scully have a dinner party and it goes horribly
an investigation is derailed by an inability to understand teen lingo
mulder wears the darkness falls jacket and no explanation is offered as to why, especially given that it’s summer
agent einstein and agent miller disappear. mulder considers deeming it an x-file but scully says don’t bother
we watch mulder and scully sweatily garden for no plot purpose whatsoever even though we all know that’s going to be the best part of the whole episode
it has an actual real ending that isn’t fake
skinner decides to brighten up his office by placing a fun unicorn poster over the picture of the president