BingoBats

{He/It} {21} {Traumagenic Sys} Call us Batsy. Shits too complex, just live.

[bingobats]

Welcome to the Inbetween

This is our intro? I Suppose?

Call us Bats or The Wanderer, use he/it pronouns.

We are an adult, this is an 18+ account, we may post explicit content along with horror or gore related things.

We have BPD, autism, adhd and are in treatment for our system at this moment. We do contain many fictive based alters so if that makes you uncomfortable, I suggest leaving now.

We are a traumagenic system who is endo-neutral since theres still not enough known about them, study wise. We do believe trauma is needed to be a system but dont plan on arguing with others on that topic in the future. Information, articles and research is always welcome however. Just please play nice. Drama is not needed or wanted.

DNI:

•Under 18, no minors are allowed on our page.

•If you get offended easily, I’m not here to coddle others 🤷 Just here to vibe and get my opinions out

•Homophobic, racist, transphobic, xenophobic, ableist, etc You’re not welcomed

•Youre going to fakeclaim characters, alters or others. You will be blocked.

Please Interact with if:

•You enjoy system related topics

•Interested in TMA, Hannibal, Arcane, MHA, EOS10, Helluva Boss and Hazbin Hotel, Dandadan, Homestuck, Cowboy Bepop, Kaiju No8, SPN, SallyFace

•Non-specific interests in taxidermy, oddities, greek mythology, subcultures, gay culture, cosplay (especially from fanbases above), DIY, horror, truecrime, etc

•Would like more adult friends :)

Our other account random account is @metalicclergy where we will post random stuff that pertains to our likings. We dont have anything super flashy but whatever.

[bingobats]

me in the open doorway of the bathroom, pointing down at my boyfriend on the toilet: !!!!!!!!!!PEE BOY PEE BOY!!!!!!!!!!

my boyfriend looking up at me unamused by my antics: says the big shitter

me:

[bingobats]

its so fuckin weird seeing people from grindr (who have hit you up wanting ykw) in person or through a mutuals post or something. theres something that sits with you internally that makes you dread it. like when you get out of the pool or ocean and you only have the soggy pair of underwear that you wore in, so you now just have to sit in it.. It’s uncomfortable, you dont like it, you wish you wouldve thought it through a little bit more but it ultimately doesnt harm you..

[corazonkillsyou]

HAVING A BOYFRIEND WHO LOVES YOU IS AWESOME AND I LOVE HIM. I get to kiss him and see him and hear his voice… awesome….

[bingobats]

This is how it feels to be back after being dormant for ages! God, it’s nice. -Whizzer

[bingobats]

us existing:

for the last week, whispers: K1-B0…. K111-B000…

[littlest-owl-prince]

"you cant use your disabilities an excuse"

there are many reasons why a disability will disable someone. before you call it an excuse, maybe try considering why their disability, visible or invisible, effects their abilities.

[trans4trans]

[smegmafactory4prez]

At this point it's both cheaper and healthier to just do amphetamines

[revied-and-alive]

you aren't a bad person if your source is terrible.

you aren't a bad person if your source is an abuser.

you aren't a bad person if your source is a rapist.

you aren't a bad person if your source has a problematic creator.

you aren't a bad person if your source is anything, anything.

However, if you blame an introject for their source, tell them to kill themselves for it, treat them like their source when they tell you not too, push boundaries or persistently ask them questions, try and make it like they should be extremely ashamed and horrified 24/7 atwhere they introjected from. You are an asshole.

[stormysapphic]

anyway here's to disabled people who are not healing. disabled people who are not recovering, ever. people with disabilities that only get worse and worse over time. people who cannot access treatment for their disabilities or whose disabilities simply aren't treatable. people who know they'll only get more and more disabled as time goes on. people who know their disability will kill them sooner or later. you are seen, you are important, you are not dead weight, and you deserve support.

[dear-ao3]

[bingobats]

me when i.. when you.. uhh- *breaks into dance as a way of showing affection*

dadafa

hahah

wahoo

*jazz hands*

:D

[bingobats]

i dont think love is meant for me. no, not in the same way. i see love around me with my friends and their partners and with my family. i love watching them and it fills me with joy and of course i love them! .. but somehow when i have love, romantic love, i hold it in my hands and something always feels off.. its morphed or sinister or halfway complete.. i dont want that kind. i want something authentic, real and unapologetically unique! i want the person to want me and have no regrets or doubts about it. i want to just look them in their eyes and know that theres no malice or harm.. i dont want it to turn to dust or to keep going back to the battle ground.. those cant be my only options.. right?

[plurapony]

IMO nothing is more reality shattering than the autism and DID duo 💔

when i get obsessed with a show, like really obsessed the lines between what's fiction and what's real start to blur. i start to feel connected to these characters, like they aren't people I am watching on the screen in front of me but ones that i know. i feel empathy for them, and i feel scared and anxious too when they're in danger.

when i get really obsessed with a show it completely takes a hold of me, i have an animalistic urge to keep engaging because it's not just their world anymore - it's my world too now. i cannot even escape from it in my dreams, as it infects that too.

and then when you add in the DID when i have an introject from the media it makes the obsessive spiral even more immersive. i am connected to the show in an even deeper way, though i know i am not really a character in the show i can't help but view my source as myself. that is me and this is my show!

logical thinking is always there of course but sometimes even logic is overpowered by the reality break of the autistic obsession when guided by DID

[gravestormsys]

Just the near painful craving when said show ends and you don’t have anything to continue with, so you just rewatch it which double it down

[bingobats]

i dont get this whole “pro endo” “anti endo” bs but you gotta have repeated childhood trauma in order to have a system ._. like thats literally in the criteria for CDD or DID or OSDD, all of it. like if you have a relationship to all these fictional characters, you may just be a kinnie and thats okay! theres NOTHING wrong with that!! but claiming you have a trauma disorder without trauma is like saying you need prescription glasses but arent blind :// this is just my personal take on it but feel free to educate me in the comments if you want since “endogenic” is still new for me/us

[thecircularsystem]

Hey! I’d love to talk some about this.

Context: I’m a DID system who’s been looking into endogenic systemhood for years now out of curiosity.

Trauma is not in the criteria for CDDs, which is actually essential for systems like mine to get our diagnosis. I didn’t recall any childhood trauma at the time of my diagnosis, and while I definitely do now, trauma being part of the criteria for CDDs would’ve barred me from that diagnosis. I’m completely with you that these disorders require repeated childhood trauma to form — but that’s not from the criteria! That information comes from years and years of studies into the origins of these CDDs.

The vast majority of endogenic systems do not claim to have any form of CDD. There are certain similarities between endogenic systemhood and CDD systemhood — namely, having multiple autonomous agents in one brain, and potentially dissociative moments brought on for various reasons — but by and large, they’re not experiencing the same type of systemhood as us. To utilize your analogy, this is saying you wear reading glasses, but don’t need them all the time — or even, people who wear glasses with no prescription, as that fits and frames their face in a pleasing way. And, just like there’s thousands of types of frames and lenses, there’s thousands of types of ways a system might present itself (both in endogenic systemhood and in CDD systemhood).

I have seen endogenic systems who also experience kins! This doesn’t negate their systemhood, however; the experience of the two feelings are entirely different from what I’ve heard. I don’t personally understand that one (I don’t really understand kins much) but just like how CDD alters aren’t kins, it seems endogenic headmates also aren’t.

Lastly, I want to highlight that a lot of terminology is shared between the CDD and endogenic communities, but this isn’t due to endogenic systems “stealing” from disordered communities or “claiming to have a CDD.” Not saying you said this, but it’s a common argument I see. In truth, the endogenic community stemmed off of a subset of the DID/MPD community years ago (even back when it was still MPD). These individuals sometimes were diagnosed with DID, or experienced plurality, but didn’t feel the diagnosis label fit them. Regardless of the actual truth surrounding their CDD status (if they had it or not, if they were diagnosed or not, etc etc), they were part of that community. Hence, the language after the big split in the community remains the same across both “sides” rather firmly.

Even despite that, you’ll see many endogenic systems trying to move away from more medical terminology, such as “alters” being “headmates,” or “system” even being “collective” in many cases. This isn’t a good litmus test for if someone is a CDD system or endogenic system — everyone uses their own terminology for their own reasons — but it can be helpful at times to know.

[bingobats]

This!!!! I love this!!! Thank you for giving actual information!! If you have any sources or articles that I can read or watch, could you send them my way? Cause what you’re saying does seem to make sense!

I do want to remain relatively neutral on this topic just because I am not educated on endo’s but am on CDD. So my opinions are going to be a little biased 😅

[thecircularsystem]

Of course! Happy to provide. Keep in mind that there’s not much research into endogenic plurality as yet — this phenomenon has only really started being mainstream within the last 20-30 years or so, with the term endogenic being coined for systemhood in 2014 if I’m not mistaken.

This link is to a collection of resources pulled together by the guardian system. I CANNOT attest to the quality of all of these resources, and I do actually actively despise some of the resources. For instance, the “normal dimensions of multiple personality” one actively fakeclaims DID, but is worded in such a way that it sounds like it’s supporting endogenic plurality. I would read carefully, as some of these articles aren’t the best, but others hold a lot of value. I would be on the lookout for the last name Eve — I’ve liked some of what I read from that person!

I would avoid Power to the Plural links, as those frequently spread misinformation about DID. I would glance at pluraldeepdive, both the tumblr page and the website, if you’re interested in the history of plural spaces — the good and the bad.

When I’m not at urgent care, I’d be happy to update with some more info. And if anyone else has links, please provide!!

[bingobats]

Thank you for the link! I will be reading it soon since I dont have much to do today. Though, please take your time and take care of yourself since you’re at urgent care 🫶

If theres anymore links or information, please feel free to add it to this thread, like The Circular System said!! Since it is a relatively new topic that has yet to be explored, information and research is important.

[archivoasks]

questions I think would be fun to be asked

what are 3 things you’d say shaped you into who you are?

show us a picture of your handwriting?

3 films you could watch for the rest of your life and not get bored of?

what’s an inside joke you have with your family or friends?

what made you start your blog?

what’s the best and worst part of being online/a creator?

what scares you the most and why?

any reacquiring dreams?

tell a story about your childhood

would you say you’re an emotional person?

what do you consider to be romance?

what’s some good advice you want to share?

what are you doing right now?

what’s something you’ve always wanted to do but maybe been to scared to do?

what do you think of when you hear the word “home”?

if you could change one thing about yourself, what would it be?

name 3 things that make you happy

do you believe in ghosts and/or aliens?

favourite thing about the day?

favourite things about the night?

are you a spiritual person?

say 3 things about someone you love

say 3 things about someone you hate

what’s one thing you’re proud of yourself for?

fave season and why?

fave colour and why?

any nicknames?

do you collect anything?

what do you do when you’re sad?

what’s one thing that never fails to make you happy/happier?

are you messy or organised?

how many tabs do you have open right now?

any hobbies?

any pet peeves?

do you trust easily?

are you an open book or do you have walls up?

share a secret

fave song at the moment?

youtuber you’ve been obsessed with and why?

any bad habits?

(this post was stolen from @teenage-mutant-ninja-freak, since it couldn't be reblogged anymore)

[bingobats]

i dont get this whole “pro endo” “anti endo” bs but you gotta have repeated childhood trauma in order to have a system ._. like thats literally in the criteria for CDD or DID or OSDD, all of it. like if you have a relationship to all these fictional characters, you may just be a kinnie and thats okay! theres NOTHING wrong with that!! but claiming you have a trauma disorder without trauma is like saying you need prescription glasses but arent blind :// this is just my personal take on it but feel free to educate me in the comments if you want since “endogenic” is still new for me/us

[thecircularsystem]

Hey! I’d love to talk some about this.

Context: I’m a DID system who’s been looking into endogenic systemhood for years now out of curiosity.

Trauma is not in the criteria for CDDs, which is actually essential for systems like mine to get our diagnosis. I didn’t recall any childhood trauma at the time of my diagnosis, and while I definitely do now, trauma being part of the criteria for CDDs would’ve barred me from that diagnosis. I’m completely with you that these disorders require repeated childhood trauma to form — but that’s not from the criteria! That information comes from years and years of studies into the origins of these CDDs.

The vast majority of endogenic systems do not claim to have any form of CDD. There are certain similarities between endogenic systemhood and CDD systemhood — namely, having multiple autonomous agents in one brain, and potentially dissociative moments brought on for various reasons — but by and large, they’re not experiencing the same type of systemhood as us. To utilize your analogy, this is saying you wear reading glasses, but don’t need them all the time — or even, people who wear glasses with no prescription, as that fits and frames their face in a pleasing way. And, just like there’s thousands of types of frames and lenses, there’s thousands of types of ways a system might present itself (both in endogenic systemhood and in CDD systemhood).

I have seen endogenic systems who also experience kins! This doesn’t negate their systemhood, however; the experience of the two feelings are entirely different from what I’ve heard. I don’t personally understand that one (I don’t really understand kins much) but just like how CDD alters aren’t kins, it seems endogenic headmates also aren’t.

Lastly, I want to highlight that a lot of terminology is shared between the CDD and endogenic communities, but this isn’t due to endogenic systems “stealing” from disordered communities or “claiming to have a CDD.” Not saying you said this, but it’s a common argument I see. In truth, the endogenic community stemmed off of a subset of the DID/MPD community years ago (even back when it was still MPD). These individuals sometimes were diagnosed with DID, or experienced plurality, but didn’t feel the diagnosis label fit them. Regardless of the actual truth surrounding their CDD status (if they had it or not, if they were diagnosed or not, etc etc), they were part of that community. Hence, the language after the big split in the community remains the same across both “sides” rather firmly.

Even despite that, you’ll see many endogenic systems trying to move away from more medical terminology, such as “alters” being “headmates,” or “system” even being “collective” in many cases. This isn’t a good litmus test for if someone is a CDD system or endogenic system — everyone uses their own terminology for their own reasons — but it can be helpful at times to know.

[bingobats]

This!!!! I love this!!! Thank you for giving actual information!! If you have any sources or articles that I can read or watch, could you send them my way? Cause what you’re saying does seem to make sense!

I do want to remain relatively neutral on this topic just because I am not educated on endo’s but am on CDD. So my opinions are going to be a little biased 😅