Bland BioShock Headcanons

Based off of Bland Marvel Headcanons, not affiliated with the admins and their blog or BioShock. Dull thoughts on all the characters of all the BioShock games. Does Andrew Ryan sing 'Under the Sea' from the Little Mermaid? Does Atlas tapdance? or Is Booker actually Oscar the Grouch? (present and past tense) tag: would you kindly headcanons Submit or send me your Bland BioShock Headcanons and I will post them! tag us with a #wouldyoukindlyheadcanons if you want to submit or repost something!

[blandbioshockheadcanons]

There's a timeline where a third member joined Elizabeth and Booker, her name was Vivian Monroe who wanted to escape Colombia seeing how bigoted it was. Elizabeth and Vivian later fell in love with Booker being oblivious to it thinking they're good friends. When the whole dimensional purge happened, the two alongside Booker survived and ended up living in the modern era. Booker is still oblivious.

Booker do be an oblivious man. “A city under the ocean? Impossible.” Booker. You are literally in a flying city, my guy.

[blandbioshockheadcanons]

I’m so sorry for abandoning this side blog for so long! Life has been pretty hectic for the past few years. I will try to do the formal formatting for the headcanons! Feel free to submit posts or send asks. :-)

[blandbioshockheadcanons]

Julie Langford has a gated off section of Arcadia where she grows Marijuana. Most Best and Brightest have bought from her before.

The devil’s lettuce is a pretty good business to invest in 👀 Rapture’s Best and Brightest don’t get the best and brightest on pure sober wit, I suppose.

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Tenenbaum picked up her habit of smoking from Fontaine.

Tbh I would too tho

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After the luteces “died” they spent a lot of time haunting fink and causing all sorts of trouble

This would be a DLC that I wouldn’t mind playing.

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[#wouldyoukindlyheadcanon] jack knows the bible (at least the one that was being smuggled into rapture)

I dig that.

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On the surface whenever someone said “would you kindly” Jack would reflexively deck them in the face.

[blandbioshockheadcanons]

Rosalind and Robert have a daughter that gets stuck in Rapture by accident, she grows up being Tenenbaum assistant or she ends up on Earth traveling to Rapture with Frank Fontaine 

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Jack has an ugly Christmas sweater collection

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Anonymous asked: Fontaine has a secretary who he gets along with quite well. They go to dinner once a week, and are rumoured to be dating.

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Anonymous asked: Jack has one blue eye, and one brown eye. A side effect of the heavy genetic splicing taking place in his early life. This irritated Fontaine greatly.

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Anonymous asked: Tasha Denu and Julie Langford used to date.

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Booker’s guilty pleasure, in an alternate universe, is to play Animal Crossing: Pocket Camp on his phone.

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Elizabeth’s favorite quote is: “All who wander are not lost”.

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Anonymous asked: Fontaine has a specific love for Cuban cigars. If you give him some, any deal you want is done.

[blandbioshockheadcanons]

Fontaine has a specific love for cuban cigars. If you give him some, any deal you want is done

Cigars are a man's best friend ;) (will be posted)

[blandbioshockheadcanons]

Send it some asks or headcanons!