phyllis is a gay

24, he/him, depressed, getting back into posting to avoid the endless dread

[eatshrimpdie]

just finished house of leaves oooooh

[reasonablyneurotic]

there's something in the back of my mind

[acrisius-ii]

UTENA STOP TRYING TO BECOME A PRINCE THE LAKERS NEED A CENTER

[moistvonlipwig]

they should've done a riverdale episode where cheryl hosts a party to show off her outfit and then veronica walks in with even fancier clothes + jewelry that she got from her friend katy keene and upstages cheryl making cheryl hopping mad and then cheryl gets a delivery from christine bior labeled 'almglocken' and she's like How delightsome! My very own almglocken! and starts wearing it around and everyone is like Cheryl that's a cowbell and she's like No you heathens this is an authentic christine bior almglocken. and everyone's like okay i guess but betty confronts her and says Cheryl that is a cowbell and you look stupid please take it off and cheryl says Well cousin since we're on the subject i've always thought your ponytail makes you look like a repressed serial killer. which is the thing betty is insecure about so she goes off to brood. meanwhile cheryl is starting to make cow puns every time she speaks she's like Hello veronica you're auditioning for the lead in moo-lin rouge i see and veronica is like Cheryl are you making cow puns because you're wearing a cowbell and cheryl is like How udderly ridiculous how many times do i have to tell you people it's not a cowbell it's an almglocken. then cheryl has a dream where she gets locked in the barn and taken to the market by her mother and slaughtered and turned into steak and served up to jason while we intercut with veronica singing dona dona at some sort of entertainment venue for reasons known only to veronica. then later that night jughead and tabitha hear a mysterious noise outside pop's and find cheryl eating grass and jughead is like Uhh cheryl why are you eating grass and she's like Jughead you are so STUPID i am returning to the ancestral blossom ways. Now mooo-ve out of my way. and then she turns into a cow.

and the next day tabitha is like Did cheryl actually turn into a cow last night or did i dream that and jughead is like Yeah or is that a movie we watched and then they get a call from betty who's like Guys i think cheryl is a cow now and she's on a rampage. and they rush to find cheryl who is eating all the grass in town and they're like We have to stop her or riverdale will lose its precious rivergrass. so they call archie and jughead makes him dress up as a toreador and wave a red cape at her which enrages cow!cheryl because she owns the color red and she merely loans it to archie's hair out of the goodness of her heart but now he is flaunting it so she charges at him and he uses a pitchfork to knock the cowbell off of her and she turns back into a human. and she tearfully awakens and hugs archie and says Thank you archiekins you saved me from my bovine fate just like my jj would have done. and veronica says I don't understand why did christine bior send you a cowbell that makes you turn into a cow. and betty says Actually it turns out the package wasn't from christine bior it was from cowstine bior. and everyone's like Cowstine bior?! and just then nana rose enters the room and says Oh is that the cowstine bior cowbell i ordered? I was wondering where that got to and cheryl says Nana rose you ordered this? For why? and nana rose says For the maple syrup cow of course and archie says The maple syrup cow? and nana rose says Yes child did you really think our special blossom maple syrup came just from trees? We infuse the sap with the maple milk from the maple syrup cow. I ordered that cowbell just for her and cheryl says But the package said it was for cheryl blossom and nana rose says That's because the maple syrup cow's name is cheryl blossom. and toni says Why is the cow named cheryl blossom and cheryl says Dearest tt don't ask silly questions.....for what other name could the cow that enhances our maple syrup so be blessed with? and everyone is like True enough. and then there's a knock at the door and it's the mailman and the mailman says Delivery for cheryl blossom and it's the same packaging as before and cheryl looks inside and says How delightsome! My very own christine bior nose ring! and everyone says Cheryl NO and lunges to stop her from putting it on.

and then jughead steps out of the narrative and turns to the camera and says Well i think we all learned a valuable lesson today didn't we? Be careful what you put around your neck...you never know what you'll become. I'll see you next week, but for now, good night. and then he drinks from a glass of milk and it gives him a milk mustache and he winks at the camera. end of episode

[mandi-bul]

[werewolfcave]

[jarold-rat]

unofficial benny birthday

instagram mutual picked his birthday and this is my second year celebrating it... hbd benny..

[28dayslater]

[couriersolano]

You know, i just realized that Benny is the only character you can sleep with that has dialogue DURING the act. Red Lucy, Sarah, Fisto, all just fade to black and you’re done. But Benny? That man cannot shut the hell up. He HAS to say stupid shit all the time.

[bluelectricblu]

This game is killing me

[jpm-683]

I’ll betray you like a man.

[bluelectricblu]

At lunch with friends I was telling someone about how much I do not like resi5 and my cousin goes “I want to state for the record that last night while you were playing you sat bolt upright and said ‘this is the greatest game of all time’” THAT WAS DURING THE WESKER FIGHT I CANT BE HELD ACCOUNTABLE FOR ANYTHING I SAY AND DO WHEN WESKER IS ON SCREEN.

[dragongirllezliedraws-deactivat]

what if the glitches from fallout new vegas are a side effect of getting shot by benny?

[bluelectricblu]

I think Benny falloutnewvegas would call a penis a ring a ding dong :(

[bluelectricblu]

The thing that really shocks me is theres not a lot of Caesar x Brutus fanfiction. Like there’s some and there’s some that are jokes but for two people who have a holiday every year theres startlingly little fanfiction about them. And as a warning I know very little about the actual historical situation but I do know that you have one older man who was a mentor who was betrayed by a younger man who was like a son to him. Like there’s rumors that Brutus is Caesar’s illegitimate son (not true considering Caesar and Servilia met when Brutus was in his 20s) and you guys aren’t doing ANYTHING with that. Not to mention in the HBO show it’s Ciaran Hinds and Tobias Menzies!!!!!!!!!!! Like you’ve got Daddy Issues who eventually betrays and kills Daddy Figure. And no one is doing ANYTHING with them

[bluelectricblu]

How come no one ever once ever warned me that cigarettes were addictive. Never ONCE was I informed

[calisverse]

Rome (USA-Britain, 2005), EP12

Ciarán Hinds as Julius Caesar Tobias Menzies as Marcus Junius Brutus