|| L I V I D I T Y. ||

𝐖𝐇𝐀𝐓 𝐃𝐎𝐄𝐒𝐍'𝐓 𝐊𝐈𝐋𝐋 𝐌𝐄 - 𝐌𝐀𝐊𝐄𝐒 𝐌𝐄 𝐖𝐈𝐒𝐇 𝐈 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐃 ; [ sel. ind. 18+ multimuse by indigo. // ]

[bluelividity]

me: *still isn't active on tumblr or putting effort into my characters and writing*

me: *logs onto tumblr only to make multiple sideblogs for new muses anyway*

[bluelividity]

hey babies.

i'm still not here rn, but still not gone forever.

life is crazy. brains are weird.

but the future is good.

[bluelividity]

someone pls stop me from adding gaz & ritchie from n.bc's c.onstantine to my blog I cant stop

[bluelividity]

It's a bitch's birthday!

I'm 22YO now! No real activity today, but I'm lurking around every corner. 😈😈

[bluelividity]

shoutout to penelope bryte for being my newest, softest and mildest character to ever feature on any of my blogs.

sure, rosa’s kid is a real sweet girl, but penelope is just the kindest, “on some next level” shit. prayer groups, fiercely calling assholes out, a loving relationship to her faith and an adoring shoulder to cry on. her handwriting a letter to bug because she knew she had gotten an omen? ugh, i just love her. i always have. i wish there was more penelope content.

now what do I make her tag???

[bluelividity]

FUCK IT, adding Penelope Bryte to my muses. Please expect some gifsets & metas from My Soul To Take coming up soon for Bug, Fang and Penelope coming up as I cap, dissect and cry about them. I love them all too much.

Also, if you write any muses I also write and you wanna interact with the other muses I play, PLEASE don't hesitate. I wanna cry about all the babies constantly, please IM me about any of my muses any day.

I wish I had muse for Dunkleman but I just cry @ him and Bug's relationship instead. All of Dunkleman's one liners, his style. I love him. I can see why Bug loves him.

[bluelividity]

// hello WORLD.

Ellis && Nick from L4D2 are OTP, send tweet. I love the dynamic of a suit wearing asshole and his shorter, grimier, rambling & informal boyfriend or any variations on it, I guess. hides most of my ships behind me.

anyhow, doing some more account stuff today! miss yall and the babies! I'm still kinda processing some shit BUT, I miss being here and I'm in a better place mentally, so you'll be seeing my face more here again soon!

you've been warned.

[bluelividity]

misses all of you and all of my babies aggressively.

I'm gonna make an attempt to come back here again. It's Wes Craven's birthday today and Bug & Fang are calling my name again. Replies and work may be slow, but I'm at least going to try to do something today to work on being here again, even a little. Potentially a carrd portal for easier access to each of my writing blogs, which brings me to my next point:

I’m in the process of moving Gavin to a sideblog for my own comfort, MAYBE Markus, but for now likely just Gav. I’m deciding on a URL for him, I just felt bad about kind of paying attention to him alone & the context of which he was written being featured here on this blog. I’ve been contemplating it pretty much since I even added him to begin with, so it’s been sort of on the docket from the start. Once that’s set up, I’ll put up links around the blog that will take you there! <3

[bluelividity]

hey yall. will be back soon enough. i know i’ve said it a lot, but I do mean it.

i’m over at Disco[..] for plotting and being friends, ask me for the address. i care sm about my writing and every goddamn single one of you, but the energy to put into my ACTUAL accounts and storytelling narratives has been too small. i wanna talk and plot and gush with all of you on our muses but actually writing and putting effort in here has been..... really hard lately.

an explanation of some of the related shit of why things have been weird on the accounts (hella trigger warning):

rn i’m kinda in a rough place of trying to process some past trauma from having a popular account on a social media i was maybe lowkey groomed on when i was a vulnerable tiny little thing by some famous people & their friends, and i’m just now able to say “that was weird af and i don’t think it was okay, you were adults and should have known better, look how fucking tiny and young and like the literal child I was next to one of you when you knew me and knew I had a new emotional connection with your friend under your name and fame with privileges freely given to me,” and i’ve been realizing that’s prob where a lot of my tumblr account hopping comes from because staying on a single & messy account as the follower count slowly stacks up and people begin to know me as a whole person without interacting with me behind a nonmoving account brings some reminders of how many people followed me bc they knew my content was more privileged than others as said famous folks singled me out and had repeated interactions with me, as a tiny being, who got close to their 29YO friend while adults who followed me saw the bond that was made. (I followed 50 people, while somewhere between 500-800 folks were, at one point, watching the interactions between all of us, so seeing more people follow me while I keep a low follow count myself brings some anxieties about folks not caring for me as a person and just wanting the content). my brains been fried lately & feeling isolated from friends here who care about my health or my work with no real direction in life, and knowing i have said accounts with people waiting for me as the days go by and not wanting to hurt the feelings of the folks I don’t have energy or motivation to write with rn the way i want to feels akin to how i hesitate asking for some accountability or explanation from said famous people bc i don’t want them mad at me for asking why they were so good at making me feel special and how they actually felt on participating in the special and direct texts & posts to a literal child their 29YO friend was in daily contact with.

i love my accounts here, and they mean a lot, and i love my characters, and I want to hold space for them. I do NOT have any plans to EVER leave tumblr as it stands, but I do think a small official break may be in order as i try to process and maybe make a set time aside for this being an impassioned hobby when I really want to do it and not a job where I’m in debt with personal content for yall watching, get back in therapy to address the whole weird thing that happened and the fact it now seems like I am still actively affected by it with how I interact with people on social media.

if you read this, thanks for taking the time. i’m REALLY sorry i havent been around & still owe yall so much stuff across the board. 

i’m also autistic and living in the same environment I was traumatized in even younger than that and don’t have a good handle on my own fiances with no real job & instead working with family bc of my abilities, and with the whole state of the world & with pressure being put on me by extended family to act a certain way around people and move on with my life with judgement and with me having no idea how to be an adult and move out safely and in control of my own life with disabilities and no skills, it’s been. it’s been a lot. 

even if it doesn’t look it:  i’m trying.

[writing-and-nutmeg]

[foxymuses]

                                        it’s so hard to tell which side you’re on                                                are you a man or a monster ?  ©

        rk900 penned by fox                                                             gavin penned by indigo         featured on foxymuses                                                          featured on bluelividity         ind. sel. excl. multimuse                                                        ind. sel. 18+ multimuse

[mortuamarchiv-deactivated202308]

Are   you    into    old  school   horror     movies   ?    Do   you    like   men   with  Frankenstein     complex    &   to   revive    the    night   of    the   living   dead  ? ,     listening    to    crazy    doctors   screaming       ’    RISE    MY    CHILDREN   !  ,   RISE   ! ’     or    

‘   IT’S    ALIVE   !  IT’S    ALIVE   !       * Maniacal   laughter   in   the    distance   * ‘   in    the   middle   of   night ?.     then    Damon   Corbin     is    your   dude.      ———————–   please    give   this    post   a    LIKE   or   REBLOG

if    you’re    interested    in    rping    with    this     creepy    doctor    &      see    how    he    fails    gloriously    in     reanimate    corpses    then     like     or    reblog    this    post    &      i’ll   check   your   blog .    *    NOTE   ;   remember    if    you    want    to    bring    a    loved    one,    you’ll    have   to   pay    a    high   price.           Indie,   priv   &  selective     HORROR   ,  NECROMANCER  OC .     This    blog   is    highly     TRIGGERED   written     by     FEN .                                                           MORTUAM

[wildwcmen]

just wanted to spread more awareness, for those who didn’t know!! this website will help you see everything in the tags xoxo

[bluelividity]

Apparently a human version of North from D:BH is now an active muse of mine. She was in the Special Forces. North is her military codename & her nickname, while her real name is actually Whitney Reinhardt (she's a WR400 in the game so I used those as her initials). Her father was a veteran who raised her alone so she grew up as an army brat, and she protested against her direct orders in the field when told to take out rebel forces.

[blackcatrph]

** espionage / spy based sentence starters.

“  when  they  catch  you  they  will  kill  you.  but  first  they  must  catch  you.  ”

“  when  the  time  is  right,  we’re  going  to  make  them  pay.  all  of  them.  ”

“  but  in  all  chaos,  there  is  calculation.  ”

“  i’m  not  in  danger,  i  am  danger.  ”

“  we  go  to  war  with  a  smile  on  our  faces.  ”

“  but  whatever  you  do,  always  be  dressed  to  kill.  ”

“  this  ain’t  no  place  for  a  hero.  ”

“  i  can  do  this.  and  even  if  i  can’t,  i  have  to.  ”

“  my  purpose  is  greater  than  my  pain.  ”

“  nothing  scares  me  anymore.  ”

“  there  is  some  good  in  this  world,  and  it  is  worth  fighting  for.  ”

“  you  should  not  be  here.  ”

“  i  don’t  think  you  understand  what  you’re  messing  with.  ”

“  take  cover !  ”

“  you  take  the  lead,  i’ll  cover  you.  ”

“  i’m  not  who  you  think  i  am.  ”

“  i  knew  you  would  come,  eventually.  ”

“  don’t  you  understand  ?  this  is  a  trap  !  ”

“  this  will  be  your  destruction.  ”

“  make  sure  they  don’t  see  you  leave.  ”

“  stop  touching  your  ear,  you’re  making  yourself  known.  ”

“  quick,  follow  me.  ”

“  this  is  about  to  get  really  messy,  isn’t  it  ?  ”

[bluelividity]

SORRY I HAVENT BEEN HERE MUCH, THE TIME VOID STRIKES AGAIN. I exist. I havent left Tumblr. I havent and WON'T drop threads. Whether you get a reply in ten minutes or you get one in ten months, I swear I love each and every one of you. Also, my attention span sucks so screaming at me about charas will equal faster replies and more attention, I don't make the rules i just live with the electric meat slab in my skull.

[bluelividity]

@foxymuses' human!RK900 & my android!Gavin. ♡