Can't think of a title

This blog was called a "bullshit blog" once.

[medusabraids]

what’s it like on the blurred icon side of tumblr? can’t relate to their life because i’m a child of god and cousin to jesus christ

[newusernamepending]

Female, presenting nipples.

[arthistorianmindswirls]

I tried to resist reblogging this but I failed

[buippy-deactivated20210405]

[apricops]

every king in the Middle Ages: it’s really important that I don’t die because I don’t have an heir and if something were to happen to me, the whole kingdom would be thrown into civil war

every king in the Middle Ages: anyway time to go CHASE WILD BOARS WITH A POINTY STICK

[butch-king-frankenstein]

the eternal masculine dichotomy of “I must preserve my bloodline, for it is the most powerful and special on Earth” and “I am too powerful to ever die”

[gringoslur]

this stupid flower things that it can makes me feel bad because of the fuckers that i “hurt”. yeah, maybe they have family. but u know who also has family??? me, bithc!!! fuck off!!

[gringoslur]

why this flower thinks that that lady was the most important person in my life or something. dude i just met her five seconds ago. she kidnapped me and she has a weird basement that has a bully flower. this kind of dialogue doesnt work on me very well. 

[gringoslur]

i know!!! thats the consequences of killing someone. they die. now fuck off?????? god.

[ao3tagoftheday]

[Image Description: Commentor’s pseud reading “a person who often does very odd things spontaneously (such as pouring tea on their head when something too good to be true happens)” Comment reading “this made me pour a mug of tea on my head thank you so much for this blessing”]

Reblog if you also pour tea on your head when something too good to be true happens

[unbfacts]

Man of the moment Keanu Reeves has shown his generosity by giving away £50 million of his earnings from the Matrix sequels. The 38-year-old decided to hand over the money to the unsung heroes of the sci-fi blockbusters - the costume and special effects teams.

[drst]

*fistbump*

[bitchwhoyoukiddin]

Confirmed.  He’s also dumped millions into cancer research.  I really do love Keanu Reeves a lot.

[fluffy-overlord]

Keanu Reeves is like the nicest person. He still lives in an apartment/flat and he gives most of his money away to charities and people who need it. He even invites some paparazzi people to sit down and eat with him when he’s at a coffee shop or restaurant. He’s such a nice person.

[utf2005]

[airspaniel]

When I was working on the UWS, one of my delivery guys accidentally backed his scooter into a parked car in front of the restaurant. I went out to help, since the driver didn’t speak much English, and it turned out the car belonged to Keanu Reeves. He helped us pick the scooter up, and when I asked if we could exchange insurance information (because the front of the car was pretty banged up), he kept telling us not to worry about it and put his hand on the driver’s shoulder and said “I just want to make sure you’re okay, man. Are you okay?” And he was so sincere about it and so kind that I decided in that moment I would always defend Keanu Reeves at all costs. He is an excellent man.

[jehovahhthickness]

I need to be more like Keanu Reeves because I’m evil compared to him.

[putmeincoach]

“Next few centuries”

Keanu dropping hints that he is an immortal.

[sunquark]

i love keanu reeves

[holdtightposts]

My wife and I were dining at Nobu’s in Honolulu and sitting across from us was Keanu or at least I thought it was. We kept talking about whether it was him or not and finally, I decided to throw some old school Bill & Ted at him.

I stood up and threw my arms up into the motion of an air guitar, my wife is begging me to sit back down, and I pointed at the guy who may be Keanu Reeves, and said, “Most Excellent.”

He stood up and did it back at me. Then we both had a moment and pointed at each other. I sent him another of whatever it was he was drinking. It was a cucumber sake martini. That was the end of it.

Or so I thought.

He left before we finished our meal. By the time we were done, dessert came that we didn’t order. We thought, “oh, must be compliments of the chef.” Then the bill never came. When we asked for it, our waitress said Keanu Reeves took care of it.

IT WAS REALLY HIM. And he left a note. It said, “thanks for the refresh. Keanu.”

When I finally saw him again years later, because of work. I brought it up. Then he air guitar and said, “most excellent. I remember. At Nobu’s. Thanks for the drink.” We chatted a bit and I got an autograph for my mum because she’s a huge Keanu fan. Then that was that.

What a moment.

[50shadesofyodaddysdick]

An angel

[elusianknight]

And he does a lot of anti human trafficking work iirc. Seems like a really awesome guy.

[missshirley]

Back when I first moved to NYC, I got a job as a theater usher. We were all young, 18-20 or so, and it was heavily impressed upon us that we needed to treat the theatergoers with TOTAL respect at ALL times or risk our jobs. As such, we were all totally underprepared for the drunk guy who tried to steal a bottle of wine from the lobby bar during intermission. We were trying to politely get the bottle back, but he was growing loud and belligerent. Since the second act was now starting, this was a countdown to all of us being in trouble. 

Then Keanu walks up. Calmly charms the guy. Slips the usher behind the bar cash to cover the bottle, without the guy even noticing, and walks him back in to his seat like it’s a normal thing he does every day. He didn’t know the guy, didn’t know any of us, but effortlessly deescalated the situation and quite probably saved some jobs that night. 

Just a wandering do-gooder, this man.

[walkingoutintherain]

#everything i’ve ever heard anecdotally about keanu reeves #further convinces me that he is the chillest immortal #like he’s probably just spent centuries donating blood instead of drinking it (via @revolutionarygirlshati)

[non-binary-laurie-strode]

You’ve been hit by 🔪

You’ve been struck by 🔪

A Roman Senator 🔪🔪🔪

[iamfuckingweeping]

CAESER ARE YOU OKAY

ARE YOU OKAY CEASER

[politicallyincorrectwalrus]

i love the term “partners” are we dating? are we robbing a bank? do we run a legal firm? are we the dedicated detectives who investigate these vicious felonies and are members of an elite squad known as the special victims unit? who knows.

[njioru-blog]

[starscanscream]

out of all the nge characters, i relate more to this guy

[i-hate-chick-fil-a]

You know what I call that? Growth!

[trisadumpsterfire]

THIS IS THE FUNNIEST SHIT LMAOO

[thetyrannosaur]

43 days

[blossomsfashion]

Her love shines over my horizon She’s a slice of heaven Warm moonlight over my horizon She’s a slice of heaven

Slice Of Heaven ~ Dave Dobbyn / 03 . 07 . 18

[greelin]

the real secret to immortality? not dying. you want to be immortal? ok. easy. just don’t die. that’s it. refuse to die. there you go

[greelin]

“but how” you may ask. easy. just don’t do it. refuse to. say no thanks

[tankiesinpari-deactivated202011]

the word lover is so infinitely soft. So universal. So timeless. Two girls with awkward, hungry hands. A boy and a girl in the dark. Two men in empty light. A marriage of 40 years. Letters over eons. Sappho’s poems. The corner of a mouth. Lovers, lovers, lovers.

[diablocodys]

nothing will ever surpass the comedy of bella standing in front of the fan and then the shot of edward literally looking like hes forcing down vomit

[diablocodys]

[1995lahaine]

it costs $0.00 to stop shipping siblings romantically

[1995lahaine]

disclaimer: this includes step-siblings, adoptive siblings, foster siblings, and non-siblings raised in a sibling environment! it truly is free, kids!

[hunk-is-an-anti]

On the flip side, if you ship siblings you owe every set of siblings on this planet enough money to go to therapy to be able to express affection for their siblings without feeling uncomfortable

[n64s]

Oblivion NPC Dialogue.avi

[b-noons]

Quest added

[setheverman]

hello guys today is her concert and you better not miss it because the next one is in 2029