It is with the utmost joy that I, Augustin Bon Joseph de Robespierreâyes, the younger brother of that Robespierre, @tribundupeuple and @citoyennelottie, I guessâwelcome you to my humble corner of this platform. Please, make yourself comfortableâI insist!! Itâs not like Iâm going anywhere.
Allow me to introduce myself: I am Augustin Robespierre, Deputy of the Convention, staunch believer in liberty, and⊠well, some would say the more spirited and approachable half of the Robespierre brothers. (Iâll leave you to decide what that means, all I know is that I shan't lecture you on virtues for hours. Still love him though!) Life is far too fleeting to be spent brooding, oui?
I must confess, Iâm still navigating the ins and outs of this peculiar little "blog," but Iâm terribly excited to engage with you all. Ask me anything! Iâm all ears!
Do mind your manners, thoughâafter all, a friendly correspondence is far more enjoyable than a heated argument. Life is short, and I prefer to spend mine without many quarrels (despite being a lawyer, isnât that hilarious!)
And, Now, I must warn youâI do have a rather short attention span. If your correspondence involves anything remotely fun, it will likely capture my interest at once. However, dull inquiries or overly formal matters might...well, find their way to the bottom of my pile. Ahem.
> blahbllahhblahhh ueuahh, come on, you guys know what a roleplay account is right ?? do i even need to do this disclaimer ??? alright fine, * ruffles paper *. ahem ahem ahem. duhduhdudhduhhh alright. This is a roleplay account based off of Augustin Robespierre (aka Robespierre the Younger) and obviously it's not a historically accurate account as i was not alive 200 years ago to speak to the man himself. I strive to always learn more about Bonbon and the circumstances/people that surrounded him, apologies if I get somethings wrong !!
> This blog is ran on EST / GMT-5
Tag directory ââ
#lettres dâAugustin â Replies to letters and questions sent to the inbox.
#conversations en famille â Exchanges or correspondence with the other Robespierres.
#en direct du club des Jacobins â Responses or interactions with other Jacobin club members
Well.. Though she is my older sister by three years.. I will not be that person! She has enough to be upset about already, and frankly if telling the Thermidorian interrogators she is 28 helps her situation then I am not going to be the one to correct it. Women are treated better when they are younger, unfortunately, this is a known fact about the world we live in â and C has simply applied it strategically under pressure, which if anything demonstrates exactly the kind of political intelligence I have been arguing she possesses all along (the one time she seemingly strategizes about anything...)
So. She is 28. She has always been 28. My older sister who is younger than me is 28 years old.
AITA for having my sister escorted out of Paris by the one person she hates most because she was becoming a political liability and also possibly consorting with known criminals?
throwaway because my brother is basically the most famous man in France and i cannot have this traced back to us
OK so. Background. I (31M) am a representative of the people currently on mission with the Army of Italy. My brother (36M, let's call him M) is... you probably know who he is. My sister (28F, let's call her C) has lived with us on and off for the past two years, and things have recently gotten complicated: And while I confess I do not have long, with there being an army to attend to and a Carnot to destroy and approximately seventeen other crises of varying urgency. This situation with my sister has begun to occupy my thoughts in a manner incompatible with the efficient prosecution of the Republic's business and I require an outside perspective.
Let me explain the situation plainly, as I believe in frankness above all things: C and I were very close. When M left for Paris in 1789 we were basically running the household together in Arras, scraping by, genuinely struggling; she was writing to M to send money, I was writing to M to send money, the whole shebang.. When we finally came to Paris in 1792 we moved in together, worked together, supported M together. I say this so that you understand: this is not a case of a brother who has never paid attention to his sister.
The trouble began, I suppose, in Nice. I had been sent on mission to the Army of Italy â an assignment I accepted with pride, knowing it would be difficult and knowing the road would be dangerous. C came with me for company. This was, I think, a reasonable thing. She is my sister. We had always been close. It seemed natural.
While we were in Nice, C and my colleague's wife (let's call her MR) took up the habit of riding horses through the countryside in a manner that attracted extremely unflattering press attention.. You understand the climate. We are trying to make the Mountain beloved, not feared. We cannot have people writing that the representatives of the people are sending their women out to ride like aristocrats while the soldiers go hungry (though, personally, I found rich pun intended given that MR is from Grasse and C is from Arras but ANYWAY). I asked them to stop. C agreed to stop. I trusted her word because she is my sister and her word had always been sufficient.
Then while I was away she went again with MR.
I will.. pass over the details of what followed, except to say that I believed what I was told by someone I had no reason to distrust, and that the rupture between C and myself has its roots here, and that by the time she returned alone to Paris the situation between us had become strained.
Now. Apparently this makes me the villain?? I would simply like to point out that:
C had agreed to stop
The press attention was genuinely damaging
I was managing an active military situation and could not be dealing with this
I believed the person I believed, I'm not a. mind reader.
C returned to Paris shortly after. Possibly because of an administrative letter, possibly of her own accord, the details are disputed and frankly above my current ability to reconstruct clearly.
Anyway. Things were a bit strained but we were all still living together when I came back through Paris in December. Fine. Normal family stuff.
And this is the part where I think I might be justified but people keep telling me I'm not so I'm putting it to you.
C has been spending time with:
A fellow deputy (G) who M and I have held in serious contempt for years, This is not simply that I find him personally unpleasant, though I do, but he is someone who was expelled from the Jacobin Club for suspected counter-revolutionary connections, and who has documented links to shady financial dealings involving the British: I know this because I have eyes and I have read the reports.
A man currently under house arrest for circulating counterfeit currency (!!!) whose brother was guillotined the previous month for inciting civil unrest, and who is apparently now part of C's social "clique"
Various other people I cannot fully detail here because. of operational security concerns
She has also, apparently, been telling people that M and I are bad brothers, which I find particularly rich given that we are actively managing the defense of the Republic while she is having tea with people on house arrest.
Now I remind you AGAIN that I am on mission with the Army of Italy. My brother is effectively governing the Republic. Our name â and I say this not out of vanity but out of simple political realism â is at this moment one of the few things standing between this country and the chaos that would follow if the enemies of the people regained their footing. We cannot afford associations of this kind. We simply cannot. I do not say C has. bad intentions. I say she has conducted herself with a complete absence of judgment at precisely the moment when judgment was most required.
So I wrote to M and said that C has become our "greatest enemy," that she is abusing our "spotless reputation," and that she needs to be sent back to Arras immediately. Of course, because I had a VALID point, he listened to me and he arranged for this to happen.
She was escorted back to Arras by our colleague who she had been complaining about. I will admit this was perhaps not the. gentlest possible solution. In my defense.. I was busy.
And he was heading there anyways BUT REGARDLESS
She then came back to Paris anyway in July, wrote me a very long letter accusing me of treating her like I hate her, and I did not respond.
I want to be clear about something. I love my sister. I have always loved my sister. I embraced M with tears in my eyes when I feared for his safety and I would do the same for her. This is not about not loving her. This is about the fact that we are in the middle of something enormous, something historic, something that will determine whether this Republic survives or collapses, and I cannot allow personal sentiment to compromise the work.
Here is my case for NTA:
The political associations were genuinely dangerous, not hypothetically dangerous
I'm not saying she had bad intentions, I'm saying she had catastrophically bad judgment at the worst possible time
I did not make up the threat, I had actual information from sources I trusted
The Republic literally cannot function if M and I are being dragged down by association with people under house arrest for fraud
Here is where I'm willing to concede I might be the asshole:
I did not tell her what she'd done wrong at any point. Ever. She wrote to me saying she didn't understand what had happened and I didn't answer.
I sent her to Arras with the one person she disliked most on what I will characterize as a managed escort rather than a gentle conversation
I possibly processed her as a threat rather than as my sister which in hindsight is. a bit much
I literally have not spoken to her since
Regarding that last point.. Yeah yeah, I didn't write to her to tell her what she had done or why I was concerned or what she might do differently. But for what it's worth, when I wrote to M instead, the matter was handled from there. I am aware this is not how one ideally manages a family difficulty. But. There is an army out here. And frankly when I try to imagine sitting down to write C a calm explanatory letter I find I cannot do it without it becoming a denunciation, and she deserves better than that, and so I said nothing.
For what it's worth, I have been extremely busy. For obvious reasons..
But I want to be clear: I have not been a bad brother. I have been a brother in impossible circumstances, trying to protect something larger than any of us, in the only way I knew how.
So. AITA? I leave it to you to decide. I have to go. Carnot is not going to destroy himself.
Oh mon dieu, I hope this isn't an inappropriate request. My brother and I are enormous admirers of your work. Enormous. Truly embarrassing admirers. I realize this is probably very childish, but would it be possible to obtain your autograph?
Not for me.
Well, also for me.
But mainly for my brother.
Respectfully,
Augustin Robespierre
It is so rare in this climate to have correspondences with those who draw inspiration from my works; having recieved so often the dubious words of critics whose of which seem to carry disastrous effect on me.
Having expressed this, I find your letter in good humor and shall give you my name. In modernity I see my inspiration in the actions of you and your brother, by which I suppose with regard to the body politic he attempts to early to follow my Social Contract. And in his smartly organized religion âthis called a cult by his own criticsâ he attempts to follow the philosophy of my Ămile.
You attempt to create a far better France than this I knew; it is a shameful misfortune such fearful and violent throes follow your family. It appears France was not prepared for the simplicity of compassion yet.
@bonbonrobespierre I have since come to the unfortunate realization, this which haunts me deeply in a sense I am all to familiar, coming from my natural timidity, a shameful affliction, it is made evident this bloodshed and violence was perpetrated in my name and in my philosophy.
Call it imprudence or hypocrisy, but I am horrified âor perhaps terrified is more aproposâ at the vicious actions taken to achieve this virtuous republic. I do not want my name associated to these deeds regardless of their keen intentions. Whilst I remain firm aligned with the ideals you and your brother foster in France, i want my name only associated with the goodness of it.
Perhaps this is why your brother shares my meekness. Have him stow away my signature as a keepsake until France is equally minded.
Well. This is considerably less exciting than the part where I received your autograph.. I confess I do not know whether to thank you, apologize, or panic..
I understand your horror. Truly, I do. No honest man should look upon bloodshed with satisfaction. I certainly do not! My brother does not either, whatever his enemies may have written.
But I must defend him in at least one respect: While you speak as though these deeds were carried out in your name, and perhaps some men invoked your philosophy while doing them. Men invoke all sorts of things when they wish to justify themselves..
Yet I cannot accept that the violence of a revolution belongs entirely to the authors whose books happened to be sitting on the shelf. If that were true, every philosopher would answer for every crime committed by every fool who ever quoted him.
And France has no shortage of fools.
My brother admired you because he believed ordinary people deserved dignity, citizenship, education, and a government that belonged to them. He did not spend his youth reading The Social Contract and emerge from it with a sudden desire to frighten widows and fill cemeteries. Quite the contrary!
If he failed, then accuse him of failing. If he was mistaken, then accuse him of being mistaken: But I cannot sit quietly while people pretend his every action sprang from cruelty, because I knew him too well for that!
I do not think any of us would have chosen the bloodshed if we had been offered a republic without it. Whatever else may be said of us, we did not wake each morning rubbing our hands together and searching for new ways to make ourselves hated.
As for the autograph â
I shall obey your instructions and place it somewhere safe until France improves its manners.
Respectfully,
Augustin Robespierre
P.S. I had already told my brother about the autograph before the clarification arrived. The timing of this development is therefore extremely unfortunate for me personally. If you retract the signature entirely, I may be forced to write a second letter: It will be much less dignified than the first.
Sade, I am begging you to read one government document before constructing your next conspiracy board: You put Jean-Jacques Rousseau, yourself, Marat, and Maximilien in the same poll and somehow managed to insult all four of you at once..
Also, "undo his dictatorship through a militant insurrection" is a very interesting way of saying:
"A bunch of deputies who had spent months accusing him of wanting to be a dictator panicked, arrested him before he could defend himself, outlawed his supporters, shot some of them, and then spent the next several decades insisting this was the triumph of liberty."
But perhaps that's too long for a poll option..
And for the record, if Maxime had actually been the dictator everyone insists he was, Thermidor would have been a much shorter meeting. I would have made sure of it.
Robespierre the younger proves himself unfamiliar with the dictators of Rome!
Did your brother not assume a position of power to correct a crisis in Franceâ this of a restoring a lawless ochlocracy to civilityâ and failing to perform for six months, the aristocrats in their hot-bloodedness revolt, violently thrust themselves atop your brother again?
First of all, a Roman dictator was a specific constitutional office. Maximilien was never appointed dictator, never held such an office, and spent an alarming amount of his time arguing with people who insisted he secretly wanted to be one:
Second, if your definition of "dictator" is "man with influence during a national crisis," then congratulations, you've just made half of human history into dictators!
Third â and this is the important part â the men who overthrew him were, again, not exactly brave tribunes striking down a tyrant. Most of them had spent weeks trembling at shadows and convincing themselves that every speech was aimed at them personally.
.. Fourth, give me your address â we'll continue this conversation and talk in person..
Hohohoh Finally! A sentence I understand! Just straightforward insults like a true citizen! Listen here, you decrepit old man: You stay right where you are.
I'm coming to Charenton.
And when I get there, I'm going to explain the distinction between a Roman dictatorship and a revolutionary government by means of a practical demonstration conducted ENTIRELY WITH MY FISTS!
Sade, I am begging you to read one government document before constructing your next conspiracy board: You put Jean-Jacques Rousseau, yourself, Marat, and Maximilien in the same poll and somehow managed to insult all four of you at once..
Also, "undo his dictatorship through a militant insurrection" is a very interesting way of saying:
"A bunch of deputies who had spent months accusing him of wanting to be a dictator panicked, arrested him before he could defend himself, outlawed his supporters, shot some of them, and then spent the next several decades insisting this was the triumph of liberty."
But perhaps that's too long for a poll option..
And for the record, if Maxime had actually been the dictator everyone insists he was, Thermidor would have been a much shorter meeting. I would have made sure of it.
Robespierre the younger proves himself unfamiliar with the dictators of Rome!
Did your brother not assume a position of power to correct a crisis in Franceâ this of a restoring a lawless ochlocracy to civilityâ and failing to perform for six months, the aristocrats in their hot-bloodedness revolt, violently thrust themselves atop your brother again?
First of all, a Roman dictator was a specific constitutional office. Maximilien was never appointed dictator, never held such an office, and spent an alarming amount of his time arguing with people who insisted he secretly wanted to be one:
Second, if your definition of "dictator" is "man with influence during a national crisis," then congratulations, you've just made half of human history into dictators!
Third â and this is the important part â the men who overthrew him were, again, not exactly brave tribunes striking down a tyrant. Most of them had spent weeks trembling at shadows and convincing themselves that every speech was aimed at them personally.
.. Fourth, give me your address â we'll continue this conversation and talk in person..
... Mes excuses, citoyen @voltaire-official. Toute conversation avec cet homme finit tĂŽt ou tard par ressembler Ă une prise d'otage. Si, par hasard, vous rencontrez quelque philosophe capable d'expliquer ce dont parle Sade, je vous prie de m'en instruire.
Sade, I am begging you to read one government document before constructing your next conspiracy board: You put Jean-Jacques Rousseau, yourself, Marat, and Maximilien in the same poll and somehow managed to insult all four of you at once..
Also, "undo his dictatorship through a militant insurrection" is a very interesting way of saying:
"A bunch of deputies who had spent months accusing him of wanting to be a dictator panicked, arrested him before he could defend himself, outlawed his supporters, shot some of them, and then spent the next several decades insisting this was the triumph of liberty."
But perhaps that's too long for a poll option..
And for the record, if Maxime had actually been the dictator everyone insists he was, Thermidor would have been a much shorter meeting. I would have made sure of it.
First of all, I have absolutely no idea what any of those words mean.
Second of all, if "doubleplusunwindowing" means what I think it means, then I would like the record to show that I only did it once. And I wasn't even particularly successful at it..
Thirdly, why is there a Ministry of Truth? That sounds suspicious already
..Also, if we're assigning crimes by geopolitical bloc, I feel like defenestration ought to be a very international activity. The people yearn for windows.
Traditionally, I would of course be dispatching lengthy and extremely sincere letters to my colleagues expressing my deeeeep affection for them and for the noble dye-plant that stains our republic such a virtuous shade of blue.
However, this year I shall simplify matters and merely tag my family!
@tribundupeuple
@citoyennelottie
You two are, regrettably, the woad of my heart.
You colour my existence.. You stain my reputation.. You are persistent, difficult to remove, and occasionally give me a rash â but I would not trade you for all the indigo in the Republicđ
âŠIf you had been informed of my residence, I would have been eager to tell you the truth. The good that you say of our martyrs is not too charged: they were the true friends of liberty; they lived only for the people, for their fatherland; but some monsters, in one day, destroyed everything; in one day they assassinated liberty. Yes, monsieur, a republican like you would have been happy to know those men, so virtuous on all accounts; they all died poor.Â
Note written by Ălisabeth a few years before her death regarding âa work treating the revolutionâ (lâHistoire des Girondins?). Cited in Ibid, page 147.
Finally, I heard my father call our good friend: he was so good that we loved him better than a brother.
Ălisabethâs memoirs, cited in Ibid (1901) page 117.
Poor friend! You had for our parents the tenderness of a good son and for us the tender friendship of a good brother; which we returned, for we loved you sincerely!
Ălisabethâs memoirs, cited in Ibid (1901) page 126.
[My parents] were afflicted, as was our friend, by my solitude; but this last, a zealous friend of the patrie, put the duties of a good citizen before all else. He said to me: âYou are angry with me, poor little one, but you are wrong. I see, in your husband, one of the most devoted representatives of this country, one of those on whom rests, at this terrible moment, the safety of the patrie. We are threatened from all sides; we need men like him today.â My only response was to cry bitter tears, having no strength to complain; he was so good to me and spoke with such mildness! âHe will return soon,â he added, âhave courage, be worthy of him!â He saw that I was suffering, took my hand and asked me again if I was angry with him: âOh no!â I said, âmy friend, you have always been so good to me! How could I be angry with you!âÂ
Ălisabethâs memoirs, cited in Ibid (1901) page 129.
[Ălisabeth] had loved her husband, as she herself said, with a patriotic love; but through a reserve and a delicacy of heart that women will understand, it was the one she talked about the least. From Saint-Just, from Couthon, from Robespierre the younger, she cited beautiful and good deeds that had touched her. Her great admiration was for Maximilien. The interior of the Duplay family was a Jean-Jacques Rousseau-style house, an ark of domestic virtues risked on a flood of blood. When she spoke of the 9th of Thermidor, her brow darkened, her eyes filled with tears.
Histoire des Montagnards (1875) by Alphonse Esquiros, page 2-3. Section titled âmy witnesses.â
âŠI tremble, my friend, when I think of the dangers that surround you. I implore you, give us your news, report to the public your motion and the scandalous scene you suffered at the hands of an enemy of the people; your virtues, your patriotism must triumph. But you have to convince the ignorant for success to be certain. Farewell, I embrace you with tears in my eyes.Â
Augustin to Maximilien in an undated letter, 1790
âŠOur simple villagers are horribly gullible; in vain do they know what you have done for them. They forget everything to feast on the misfortune of being crushed by taxes because of you.Â
Augustin to Maximilien in an undated letter, middle of June 1790
I am angry, dear brother, that you are so weak when it comes to your interests. Why hesitate to publish the response to Beaumez? Why consult again, when Charles Lameth has signed and approved this answer? This is an insult you are doing to your greatest friend. So I alert you that I will publish this answer tomorrow.Â
Augustin to Maximilien, June 6 1790
âŠYour motion for the marriage of priests makes you get regarded as impious by all our great Artesian philosophers. It is well within my principles, but few people are at the same level! You would lose the esteem of the peasants if you renewed this motion. This weapon is used to harm you; people only talk about your irreligion, etc. Perhaps it would be a good idea to stop supporting it. I don't even believe that the National Assembly is mature enough to adopt it. Tell me if I will please you by going to Paris.Â
Augustin to Maximilien, undated 1790
âŠI cannot hide my fears from you, dear brother, you will seal the cause of the people with your blood, perhaps these people will even be unfortunate enough to strike you, but I swear to avenge your death and to deserve it like you. You will be surprised to learn how far the villainy of your enemies extends. They went to the houses of the people I saw, telling them that they were dishonoring themselves by welcoming me into their homes. I confess to you that this monstrous behavior made my blood boil, that it was prudent for these villains not to appear before me. [âŠ] I would like to go to Paris for July 14; I have not yet had a single patriotic enjoyment in Arras. I have to compensate myself. Give me, I beg you, the means to go there, it will be enough to please you.Â
Augustin to Maximilien, undated June 1790
Patriot Dupleix [sic], I learned indirectly that my brother is indisposed; I am worried; let me know about his situation as soon as possible. Send me also the cartridge that I asked my brother's friend to look for in his papers. Tell my brother that my sister is convalescing, and that I will send back Mme Witty's book in a few days. Don't waste a moment, send answers right away. My worry is at its peak. Nothing prevents me from flying to Paris. Also send me some copies of the speech on the war that your friend gave and the observations of Pethion [sic] and Robespierre. I embrace you and your family.Â
Augustin to Maurice Duplay, March 19 1792
Itâs surely not curiosity that draws in such a big number of members today, itâs the intimate sentiment of dangers against liberty that assemble them here. I am somewhat ashamed to be speaking before you, because the brother of Robespierre should be calumniated, and he is not. [âŠ] Citizens, I had a big fear, it seemed to me like assassins were coming to stab my brother. I heard men say that he would perish by their hands. Another one, whom I asked if he wanted to be the executioner of my brother, responded: âHe has been the executioner of a lot of others.â After this, it is possible to believe innocence will never be victorious! [âŠ] I donât want to leave this rostrum before making an observation on Marat: Marat canât be guilty, because he is persecuted by the same enemies that persecute Robespierre.Â
Augustin at the jacobins, October 29 1792
âŠI have just been appointed commissary to the army of Italy, the mission is difficult; I accepted it for the good of my country, I am convinced that I will serve it usefully if only by destroying the slanders with which my name has been blackened.Â
Augustin to Antoine Buissart, July 20 1793
From this moment (around June 10 1794) Robespierre and his friends acted with hostility against us, and especially against me (BarĂšre). One day they even sent Robespierre the younger to me, whom they had recalled from the Basses Alpes. This lunatic entered the committee under pretext of giving an account of his mission to Nice; but instead of fulfilling this duty, he addressed me in a furious tone âYou have maltreated my brother. We missed you on the 31st of May 1793, we shall not miss you on the 31st of May 1794.â He left still threatening us.Â
Memoirs of BarÚre (1896) volume 2, page 169.
[Robespierre the younger] complains that the lowest flatteries are used to create division between patriots: they went so far as to tell him that he was better than his brother: âBut in vain,â he cries, âwould anyone want to separate me from him: as long as he is the proclaimer of morality and the terror of scoundrels, I aspire to no other glory than to share the same tomb as him!âÂ
Augustin at the jacobins on July 11 1794, recorded in number 32 (July 18) of Mercure français.
I will say that I once saw Robespierre the younger at the house of our patriots, and there, he reiterated his reproach that I had sought to harm his brother in a note of my Censure, page 66, where I stated that I, was more attuned to humanity and sensitivity than he was since he was a bachelor; this note weighed heavily on his heart.
Les Secrets de Joseph Lebon et de ses complices (1795) by Armand-Joseph Guffroy, page 150.
Robespierre the younger: I am as guilty as my brother: I share his virtues; I want to share his fate. I demand an act of accusation against me also.Â
Augustin at the Convention on July 27 1794, as reported in number 311 (July 29) of Le Moniteur Universel
âŠProceeding to learning of the causes of the accident, the patient told us his name was [Augustin] Robespierre; that he voluntarily threw himself from one of the windows of HĂŽtel de Ville, to escape from the hands of the conspirators, because, having been put under a decree of accusation, he believed his death inevitable; that he never stopped doing his duty well at the Convention, like his brother; that no one can reproach him for anything; that he regards Panis as a conspirator, because he once came over to him and declared that Collot dâHerbois does not desire the good of his country in order to deceive him; Carnot appears to him to be one of the conspirators, who wants to surrender his country...Â
Medical report on Augustin, written on July 28 1794, two oâclock in the morning, at the civil committee of the city hall section
Who deserves the gold medal for Certified Robespierre Defending?
Citoyens, I must object on procedural grounds. There can be no vote where the outcome is constitutionally predetermined. Madame Lebas is admirable. Devoted. A saint in her own right! I will not hear a word against her!
However.
She loved him like a brother.
I was the brother.
And with aaaalllll due affection to Madame Lebas â and I assure you I hold her in the highest esteem â
The gold medal was forged on 9 Thermidor, and I already claimed it.
I rest my case. đââïž
AGAIN, just for the record, I physically launched myself out of a building about it. Let us be serious.
Wishing you a very happy birthday, Bonbon đ„°đ« Just so you know, your incredibly generous, kind and talented sister made you some treats (so long as you don't tell Madame Duplay *coughh*). That aside, however much we argue (and however right I always am), I'm very glad to have spent another year with your unwavering presence. Happy birthday again!
- Charlotte
Ah â aha. Yes. I am⊠only slightly late in responding to this. Entirely intentional. I was simply.. taking my time in considering a response.
I may have become completely smashed on ratafia with my pals and then we got lost. But. That part is irrelevant.
But â thank you, Charlotte. The treats were excellent, and the sentiment even more so, so I suppose I do accept your birthday wishes, however chronologically unfortunate this reply may be.
Just â please donât tell Maxime. About the. Getting lost part. Heâll never let me hear the end of it.
I am so sorry for your misery @tribundupeuple in regards to your siblings, especially the youngest and second oldest. Either way, I don't speak to any of mine nor do they engage in politics, my poor father has enough to deal with me. Have you tried that? Ignoring them ?
I'm kidding.
I quite like @henriette-robespierre, though.
Though citoyen @bonbonrobespierre needs to be honest about why he hates my hair or why it looks unkempt? Maybe he should go with the so-called bohemian appearance like I do.
Henriette, Henriette â donât be fooled! Youâve got lovely hair, yes, long and dark and thick â but yours looks like it was brushed this morning, and Camilleâs looks like heâs been .. How do I say .. dragged through a hedge backwards after losing an argument with his own quill.
I think it does mean that, Maxime! Theyâre profiting off our good name â without even asking first!
Weâre both lawyers, arenât we? We should sue⊠take them for every sou theyâve got! Imagine â boxes of Maxibons seized by order of the Committee, redistributed to the people⊠and by the people, I mean me.
So, I suppose you were the only one of the siblings who didnât die a virgin? đ€đ§
Ahhh â hah ! Yea, yea, yea, you could put it that way!
But hey â donât be too hard on @citoyennelottie about it, alright? Itâs not her fault sheâs as aesthetically compromised as she is in the personality department!
I cannot believe you would say such a thing as to hurt my feelings so deeply. There is nothing I could have done to offend you that you would WOUND me in this way.
YOU are just SO OBSESSED with your BEAUTY STANDARDS that you are ridiculing ME for not being PRETTY ENOUGH??
Aesthetically compromised....
You need to apologise to me for this! And if you're saying that I have a terrible personality, maybe I should remove 'generosity' from that - you should ask Maxime for your treats now đĄ
PFFFTT!! OHHH, Charlotte â !! Donât pout like that, Iâll choke!!
It was a joke!! Just a joke!! You know I think youâre lovely when youâre not being a bitch â and, well, youâre not as lovely as me, but who could be? Hah!
[But then.. he squeals when she threatens the treats, scrambling upright like she just pulled a pistol on him.]
Wait, wait, wait â no, no, no!! Donât take the generosity back!! Iâll starve!! You wouldnât do that to your poor little brother, would you??
Fine!! Youâre not aesthetically compromised, youâre⊠youâre aesthetically⊠adequate!! ⊠Beautiful even!! There, are you happy?!
