You had a goal once. It's been six months since the destruction of Pandaemonium and the end of human (and demon) civilization, but while Pandaemonium is gone, the world of perfect freedom is still out of reach. What will you do now?
Iâve made progress with Maryâs diary. As I suspected, itâs more personal in nature than what she wrote for the Order. She writes about things sheâs seen in the past, about things she can sense in the wider universe beyond this small world. She wrote about things sheâd seen in the past. She wrote down ordinary dreams and visions of futures that were not included in the prophecies she gave to the Order.
I strongly suspect she may have started berry picking her visions at some point. Definitely on her visions concerning Chrono, who she writes about extensively. Or rather, the dreams she has about him, and about her very careful planning to ensure no one is hurt when he comes for her. (She dithers a bit, debating whether it would do any good to leave a note requesting that no one come after her. It is strangely charming.) Reading her plan out how sheâs going to leave the Order with Chrono, seeing the mathematical precision of her plans, her analysis of obstacles and how she plans to circumvent them made me feel like an idiot.Â
Iâd been surprised sheâd been able to understand demon technology so quickly. I had had a not unreasonable expectation that certain concepts would be difficult for her to grasp. Now I strongly suspect she was looking at our sensors and computing devices and saying to herself, âoh, how clever! They have machines who do all the tedious calculations and tracking for them!â I may have ranted about this a bit to Shader, who was less than impressed with my realization.
âYou were looking at it the wrong way around, boss. She wasnât a medium with a divining rod; she was a networked satellite sensor array.â
âYou were surprised too,â I tell her.
âSays the man who just now figured it more than fifty years later,â Shader says in reply. She mocked me at length and then sent me off to make minor repairs in the control center.
It should be noted that Rosette and Joshua are recovered enough, and restless enough that beginning some weapons training lessons are necessary. Rosette would of course much prefer her firearms, but there is a certain shortage of ammunition and gunpowder at the moment. Joshua was eager to begin sword lessons again, and it turns out that Chrono gave Rosette some basic close-quarter shortblade lessons as well as hand to hand. I think she might do well with a long sword.
I had Rosette working on basic exercises while I worked with Joshua. This was mostly footwork, a review of defense and a light spar at half speed. Rosette was greatly distracted out of concern for her brother and suspicion for me. I had to correct her and redirect her to her exercises several times. After sparring with Joshua, I critiqued his form, and then had him briefly work with Rosette.
The activity was diverting for both Rosette and Joshua, though Rosette still grumbled about the lack of firearms. Guns are better than swords. Swords are just dumb long knives. Demons have all this technology but donât have firearms, so on and so forth. Joshua, for some reason wanting to defend Sinner honor, mentions âthe gun decks.â
Rosetteâs eyes light up in a way that is absolutely uncanny. Despite being worn down a bit by all the exercise, she wants to see the guns decks. Â This leads to a trip to the control room, where I show Rosette Edenâs defense systems, which includes the artillery arrays and the firing-spears. Rosette immediately wants to use one and is very disappointed that due to ongoing repairs, the firing spears are offline.
âYou could still fight with them as regular polearms,â I point out.
âI could use my .45 like a blackjack,â she says.
âRifles have bayonets,â I say. âFiring spears are more functional.â
âThey have hoses,â Rosette points out. âThey are basically tied to their source of ammo.â
âThey can also be operated using your own astral,â I say.
We argue about it all the way back to the living areas of Eden. It was rather entertaining. Joshua was certainly amused, and kept switching sides.
I am still having strange dreams. I have been dreaming more often of the burning house, and a woman singing. I know who the woman is, but I am filled with anxiety that I might actually see her. That what Iâm hearing is the song of a monster from the depths (beneath the waves, beyond the stars). At the same time, Iâm pulled strongly in the direction of the cabin, in the direction of the womanâs voice. I need to see her, to confirm one way or another whether I will see the woman or the monster.
Iâm wearing my armor; my sword is in my hand with blood drying on the blade. Again and again I start toward the singing, and each time, Mary is there, blocking my way, blood staining her dress. âNo, Aion,â she says in the most recent dream. âNot like this. Not with your sword and your armor. Youâll frighten her.â
No matter what I say to convince her she wonât let me pass, and I canât move her aside, and the dream fragments into a confusion of images and sensory impressions. Sometimes when I wake up I think I hear flames crackling. More often, I just have a headache and feel like I never actually went to sleep.
âNot with your sword and your armor,â Mary says. âYouâll frighten her,â she says. As if I was choosing to appear in the dream that way, instead of wearing what my subconscious dictated. I was tempted to go to the place where Iâd spoken to her before to give her part of my mind on the subject, but I felt a certain caution about it. I do not want to confirm that Mary was somehow in my dreams holding me back from something that was actually there. I do not want to confirm the presence of a âher,â interrupting my sleep with her grief, her burning cabin and her dead husband. Â
There have been more ghosts and more âreplays.â Some appearances have been more disturbing than others. A number of younger brothers and sisters have made appearances. Rosette was surprised and then angry about this. (First she was wildly angry at the Pursuers, for condemning children to death, then she turned around and was furious with me.) We argued, and I had to leave the room. Rosette made to come after me, but Joshua and Shader held her back.
ââŠdonât call him a coward for leaving,â Shader said as I departed. Â
âWhat do you call it then?â Rosette said, loud enough to carry.
ââŠI donât thinkâŠâ Joshua said, and something else I wasnât able to make out.
I found myself out on the catwalks on the lower levels, my feet dangling over the edge minutes later. It was cold and gray, the wind full of bits of ice. I barely felt it. I was not far from the spot where I heard Mary tell Chrono about her death. âShe makes it sound so simple. Escape the Pursuers, keep everyone safe, find a place,â I said out loud.
âIsnât it?â Mary asked.
It wasnât surprising. Somehow I knew she would be there. âThere wasnât a place,â I said. âNot among humans.â
âOthers thought differently.â
âOne or two could escape or disappear. We were too many, and there was truly nowhere we could go,â I said. âAlsoâŠHumans were already corrupted.â
âYou blame Pandaemonium for that,â Mary said.
âI agree with your Bible, perhaps,â I said. âApples, serpents.â
âIt isnât my Bible,â Mary said, sounding a little exasperated. When I looked up she was just a faint smear of light against the gray. âIt was never my Bible. Just because I was found by a Christian order, it doesnât make me Christian.â
There was an odd sort of note at the word âfound.â I echoed the word at her.
âOr kidnapped,â Mary said. âAs much or as little like kidnapping as it can be when you know itâs going to happen, so you slip out of the house you donât remember growing up in at night to meet the Magdalen Order members who have come for you.â
âYou saw that something might happen,â I said. âSo, Jewish?â
âAs Jewish as itâs possible to be, when in place of one life, and one religion, you know a thousand religions and a hundred thousand lives,â Mary said. âI could be any religion.â
âI wanted to save you from what you would suffer being one more voice within Pandaemonium,â I said.
âThat didnât quite work,â Mary said quietly.
I think I might have reacted badly to those words at another time, expecting an attack, the horrific resurrection of Pandaemonium. But I couldnât hear Her voices. I couldnât hear the screams. I heard Mary. âHow so?â
âI was already torn to pieces. What saved me I think was the watch Shader made for Chrono. I think it could have saved me completely, if Shader had had enough time.â
I laughed, a harsh ugly sound to my own ears. âIf I hadnât been so intent on killing you, you mean.â
âNo, exactly what I said,â Mary replied. âAion, do you regret your single path?â she asked.
âI donât know,â I said. âIâm tired and everything hurts. The hauntings arenât helping, nor are arguments with angry young exorcists.â I took a breath. âIâll be glad when this is over and I can rest.â I rose to my feet and made my way back inside. Â
I had strange dreams of a woman singing. I felt uneasy because it wasnât a voice Iâd ever heard before, but at the same time, it felt familiar. I also dreamed of Fiore, her usually calm voice raised in anger with another woman. I donât remember the topic of conversation, and I awoke defending Fioreâs right to think of herself in the way that she chose. The dream put me in very poor spirits, both because I missed Fiore to an uncomfortably painful extent, and because somewhere in the back of my head I was also arguing with Genai and saying all the things I didnât say when he dared to hurt Fiore. (I think if Joshua had been there at the time, I would have allowed Joshua to demonstrate that Fiore doesnât protect Joshua, Fiore protects everyone from Joshua.)
Thinking of the conversation with Mary after the fact was disturbing. I hadnât been surprised by her presence, or angry or upset. I had almost expected her to be there. It hadnât quite felt the way it had while she was still alive, those months when she became a part of our lives as if she had always been one of us. It had been fairly close however.
I wish I had thought to ask her about the hauntings.
Holy crap I thought this blog was deleted. Came on here a few months ago, and poof! it said it was gone! Anyway, glad it's still here. I love this story! (even I know nothing of boat trolls XD)
No, I just changed the name. In retrospect I should have put up a notification, but I did not. bones and salt is still going I just have other projects in other fandoms, and CC is a very quiet fandom so.
You do not need to know very much about the boat trolls or home stuck. I just absolutely could not resist the AUvalanche that is the Boat Trolls.
For Rosette: Do you feel like you understand Aion better, or is he just as weird as always? Joshua: If you all do find Chrono, how do you think you'll react to him?
Rosette: Iâm mostly understanding that he somehow gets people to look up to him and trust him and I have no idea why? Or even how? Heâs manipulative as hell and he uses people. He hurt Chrono, but I know that Chrono still cared about him. I can see that Joshuaâs angry with him, but at the same time theyâre thick as thieves. I almost want to ask Joshua about it, but uhâŠIâm pretty sure weâll argue about it. Again.Â
Joshua: I donât know. I really donât know. Rosette died. She died and Chrono said heâd protect her. Iâm angry about that, even though I know logically he probably thought she was safe. Iâm angry because she made a contract with him in the first place butâŠIâm more mad at myself because she did it to find me.
There have been more âreplaysâ of battles fought on Eden. Two were of the escape from Pandaemonium, one was of the Oratorio. I found myself in the replay of the Oratorio facing off against a very angry young Magdalen Order exorcist with a violin. Her attacks were very forceful but I was able to overcome her. Her name was Feather, and she seemed very âcaughtâ in her memory of the battle, but I was eventually able to reason with her.
Though she still seemed inclined to attack me, we managed to exchange information. I explained to her the purpose of the Oratorio and the results. (Well, the purpose of destroying Pandaemonium, not the entire System.) She seemed even more inclined to attack me, but held herself back and answered my questions.
She had been intermittently âawakeâ for quite some time before the memory of the battle activated. During here âawakeâ periods she reported sometimes not knowing whether she was dead until she remembered. She could sense that there were âother spirits,â within Eden, though she didnât know precise locations, nor had she seen anyone she knew. In the aftermath of the battle, and after our conversation she became tired and faded from sight, though I still had a sense of her presence.
Rosette was caught in the one of the battles during the escape. I found her on one of the lower levels trying to perform first aid on someone only she could see. It was so strange, watching her try to help. It was strange that she would want to help. She was very quiet afterward when she woke up from the replay, and kept giving me strange looks all through dinner. After dinner during our practice session and exercise regimen in the gym she said suddenly, almost accusingly, âthey were all kids. Some of them were younger than Azmaria.â
âI do remember, Rosette,â I said. âI was there after all.â
She frowned at me. âBut you donât care,â she said. âYou donât care now and you didnât care then when you told Chrono that there wasnât any point in mourning them.â
âChrono told you that?â I asked. That hadnât been what I said at all. I admit it hurt a little that Chrono hadnât understood what Iâd meant, but I wasnât exactly surprised.
âI saw it,â Rosette said. âI saw Chronoâs memories of what happenedâŠyouâre face just went weird.â
âI canât imagine why,â I say. âConsidering that seeing a battle replay from Chronoâs point of view would imply that he was dead.â
Rosette shakes her head. âNo, I mean when I tried to snap him out of-of trying to shut everything out because he was afraid of hurting me.â
I stare at her, honestly hoping she wasnât implying what I was almost certain she was implying. âSnap him out, how?â
Rosette says, as calmly as if she wasnât implying a considerable amount of stupidity. âWhen I dove into his soul.â
âRosette, you are no longer allowed to call me crazy,â I said. âYou are certifiable.â
She glared at me. âHe wasnât listening to me or anyone. It was the only way I could reach him!â
âYou projected yourself into the soulspace of a demon you were contractually bound to, who could have drained you without even thinking about it. Without being able to think about it, because he was âshutting everything out.ââ
âWell, it worked,â Rosette said defensively.
âIt worked,â I echoed. âI worked. Where were your superiors while you were performing this stupidly reckless act? Did no one have the sense to stop you?â
âLike Iâd let them,â Rosette said fiercely. âThey didnât think it would work, but they didnât try to stop me.â Â
âThen they were idiots,â I said. This upset her and we ended up arguing.
Joshua was caught in the other replay of the escape from Pandaemonium. This replay was visible and apparently powered by a deceased viscount. Joshua fought the viscount, aided by another ghost, a Sinner named Presynne. I arrived at the scene just as the viscount wore himself out and faded. Joshua had a sword in his hand, Presynne a lance. Joshua turned defensively in my direction as I came up, but relaxed when he recognized me. âAion,â he said, and might have said more, but his eyes rolled up in his head and he collapsed, the sword fading from his hand.
I caught him, and gently laid him down, checking his pulse.
âHeâs pretty good, even with a bad leg, brother,â Presynne said.
âThank you for coming to his aid,â I said. I had so many questions, a confused welter of them, but nothing came out.
Presynne chuckled. âHe came to mine. Flying out of nowhere with a surge of power like you wouldnât believe. Woke me up pretty damn quick.â
âIâm sorry he disturbed your rest,â I said.
âThat wasnât restful, brother,â she said. âNot even a little.â
âYou were all supposed to be gone. Sleeping. But youâre back,â I said. âI donât understand.â
âIâmâŠnot sure we went wherever you thought weâd be going, brother,â Presynne said gently. âThereâs justâŠmore energy?â
âFrom Joshua?â
âI donât think a human can hold as much as Iâm feeling,â Presynne said doubtfully.
âYouâd be surprised,â I said, and picked Joshua up, and started toward the infirmary, Presynne trailed me.
We spoke, and Presynne reported the same periods of wakefulness followed by forgetfulness that Feather had reported. She was able to give me more information on other Sinner ghosts, and also other Pursuer ghosts. She asks about Rizelle, Genai and Viede, about âthe humans.â She disappears by the time I reach the infirmary, her voice then her general presence becoming fainter, then fading away.
After some internal debate I decided to personally contact Kadros. I wanted some confirmation that the dream had been âreal.â (That is, that I had somehow spoken to Kadros and one of his allies in a dream.) I also wanted to test the possibility that Rosetteâs mentor Father Remington was alive. (And perhaps issue a warning about a Legion infused human who might read as a âdemonâ and who might decide to attack Kadros and his allies.) I was not initially able to reach Kadros, but I was able to speak to one of his allies, the one Shader refers to as Galley.
The conversation wandered a bit, but I ended up learning a great deal about Erskine Aspera, whom Galley is not fond of due to the anomalous âdreamwalkingâ factor. (Galley understandably does not appreciate people wandering into his head. I can sympathize.) Erskine is a Magdalen Order âMilitiaâ member from England who has been living in the U.S. for at least four years. He was rescued from a very large âdemon bearâ by Saniza and Kadros, and eventually stopped trying to kill Kadros. (It takes a certain amount of chutzpah to attempt to rise out of your sickbed to strangle the person who saved your life. It would be interesting to leave Aspera and Rosette alone in a room together.)
Galley theorizes that Father Erskineâs anomalous ability was either (accidentally) taught to him by a deceased sorceress named Chole Vines, or something that came about as a result of using the soul-diving rig used by Magdalen Order agents while performing an exorcism. Due to the anomalous ability and the previous encounter with Chloe Vines, Father Erskine is no longer âpermittedâ to dreamwalk without and escort who can pull him back.
During this conversation, Kadros made an appearance, and we discussed the dream and certain things mentioned by Father Erskine. I told him about Father Remington explained what little I knew about the âLegionnaire Projectâ and mentioned that Father Remington might be tracking Eden, and might come across Kadrosâ little protectorate. âHe might be inclined to misunderstand your situation,â I said.
âThat would not be surprising,â Kadros says. âWhatâs also surprising is that youâre warning us.â
âIâm offering information, in hopes we might get information in return,â I replied.
âIf this Father Remington makes an appearance, weâll let you know,â Kadros said.
Rosette and Joshua are both on their feet, and I have a sparring partner again. Rosette spent the first few bouts glowering at myself and Joshua during the match, but was eventually coaxed by her brother into taking a few lessons from him. Most of her combat experience was with firearms, though she had apparently picked up some of Chronoâs hand to hand and short-blade work. Sheâs about average sized for a human female but would probably do well with a long-blade. (She greatly prefers her firearms, however Iâve been attempting to persuade her that due to a lack of ammunition, she should consider stabbing, cutting or crushing weapons that extend her reach.)
Joshuaâs curiosity got the better of him recently and he decided to borrow certain materials from the library. Certain materials that a young and sheltered female who was trained by a religious order would not want her brother perusing: that is to say erotica/romance. (It was partly my fault for reminding him the section existed. It came up in a discussion about relationships, which somehow became a discussion of Genaiâs collection of illicit magazines.)
The resulting altercation resulted in my having to throw Rosette into the nearest water collector and persuade Joshua to return the majority of the material to the library. Joshua was upset and very prickly about the situation (and some of Rosetteâs arbitrary orders) but we talked about it, and Joshua was able to have a more mature conversation with his sister once I allowed her to climb out of the water collector.
On the way back inside I and Rosette argued about censorship, my alleged depravity and general bad influence. My general point was that Joshua was not in fact a horrifying secret sex fiend. He was an adolescent male who feared being caught out by his sheltered sister and let his eyes get too big for his head. I also pointed out that I had been just as startled by the quantity and persuaded him to put it back, and that also, she should respect his privacy and not barge into his room without knocking. Rosette was initially hostile, but eventually listened to me, and then had a much quieter more polite conversation with her brother.
There have been some disturbing incidents within Eden. I donât have Chronoâs particular sensitivities, but I have been feeling as if Iâm being watched. Joshua, Rosette and Shader have reported similar incidents, and at one point Joshua actively experiencedâŠa memory. He saw a battle, the battle that took place during the escape from Pandaemonium. He was extremely shaken by the experience, as were Shader and I when he related what he had seen.
Shader notes that during the time Joshua was experiencing the memory, there had been a surge of Astral energy in that general area. Sheâs not entirely sure what caused it. I am uncomfortable with the idea of Eden being haunted, though that seems to be the situation. Rosette and Joshua both want to investigate the haunting, though Rosette is short on snare-wards and other tools of her profession. Shader thinks she can rig something up that will work just as well. Â Â
There has been another encounter with a sorcerer attempting to dominate a community. Or in this case, continuing to attempt dominating a community. The sorcerer was being held at bay by the very strong wills and anomalous powers of two young men and a young woman. (All three as well as other members of the community were distorted in some fashion by Legion but were otherwise healthy.) One of the young men and the young woman had what could be best described as âenergy manipulationâ powers and telekinesis. (Ruby and Daniel) One of the young men was a healer. (Thomas) All three had telepathy and projective empathy.
This particular community was built from a handful of the staff of a resort and their guests. The community had initially assisted the sorcerer, who had stumbled in from another location. (He had said he was from further north, over the Canadian border.) The sorcerer had broken the unusual amount of cohesion between the former staff and guests in an attempt to divide and conquer, but the most of the community rallied and escaped from the resort to a nearby abandoned town where they were attempting a counter attack and rescue of their enthralled community members.
I discovered this story after having been shot by Ruby, who had mistaken me for one of the Sorcererâs demons. After disarming her and a lengthy discussion, she took me to meet the rest of her community. After some more discussion and a great deal of strategizing in which I found myself playing warleader, I assisted them in retaking the resort and defeating the sorcerer. This was a lot more complicated than Iâm making it sound. The sorcerer had control of two counts, neither of whom was willing to stand down after being freed when they realized I was a Sinner. There was also the added difficulty of the enthralled community members, whom the others didnât want to be harmed.
I was injured during the battle with the counts, but I saw Ruby and Daniel defeat the sorcerer, who went down raving about miscegenation. (Ruby spat on the dying sorcerer snarling, âno worries about that!â and kicked him for good measure. Then she burst into tears. Daniel very gently led her away. There was a story there, a very personal one, and I felt somewhat embarrassed to have witnessed it.)
I might have returned to Eden at that point, but the community instead gave me what they could spare in exchange for my assistance. They gave me or showed me where I could locate gasoline, spare parts for the vehicles, some canned food, books, records for the phonograph, clothes and medical supplies/medicine. In return, I had Shader send down âinformation packetsâ she and I had constructed about wards and using Legion, and a few radios, which should put them in contact with other communities.
Shader fussed a great deal during and after retrieving the supplies. She was worried that I hadnât been getting any sleep and I wasnât healing as fast as I should. She presented me with a new sword, and ordered me to get some rest immediately. (Rosette and Joshua were on hand for the dressing down Shader delivered. Joshua thought it was funny, Rosette made comments about my not being as tough as she had thought. Her bravado turned out to be false when I and Shader turned to glare at her.)
The new sword should refine the astral collection process, and store additional energy for me to use. Shader is working on something similar for Joshua. Heâs apparently developing some interesting âpower spikesâ that are setting off his asthma (in addition to the thousand other things that set off his asthma). Joshua is of course, immensely frustrated.
My dreams continue to keep me up, but I think, no worse than they have in the past. Perhaps it is only that the dreams are more vivid than I remember them being. Iâve had nightmares before, but I donât think they felt as real, or were as strange as what Iâve been dreaming lately.
I dream of the time when Mary was living with us on Eden, but somehow Rosette and Joshua are also there, and the Emissaries of the Dead. (They are very clearly Emissaries, not the children I so carefully acquired. They have wings and their feet barely touch the ground, their eyes distant yet strangely focused.) Mary debates or perhaps argues with them in dozens of languages, and I barely understand the topics.
Also there is âFather Remingtonâ badly damaged by Legion, sitting in one of the common rooms, with an equally damaged Chrono. I remember the dream Iâd been told that the last surviving âLegionnaireâ had a bad fall but was âquite tough.â He and Chrono are talking together, and donât seem to see me. Chrono is worried about something, and the priest is attempting to reassure him.
Mary pulls me away and shows me a room filled with a strange textile sculpture that bends and twists in a nonexistent breeze. What Iâm looking at, she explains, is actually a map. âThis thread here is you,â she says, pointing to a single red thread. âSee what youâve stitched together?â
âI donât see any differentiation between the threads, except for the red thread,â I tell her, puzzled.
Mary smiles with a bewildering sort of pride, as if I were student who had been particularly clever. âExactly!â
âI donât understand,â I say.
âIt isnât âfateâ Aion. I donât spin, weave or cut the threads,â Mary says. âYou arenât the shuttle.â
I awoke with those words still in my head, trying to formulate an argument. âI can only go forward,â I say. âI canât consider any other options than the one Iâve decided on.â
Warning for: Gore, Body Horror, Blood and Trippy Dreams
I have had more unsettling dreams.
One involved an Eden in orbit around a blasted, burned Earth. It was full of demons, other Sinners. I was talking to Shader about the next generation of children to be born, but then Mary was there, horribly fused with Pandaemoniumâs head and regenerated body. She spoke Pandaemoniumâs familiar litany of having no home, of being outcasts, and the banks of incubators turned into a blackened honeycomb from which blood began to pour.
The deck beneath my feet cracked and heaved apart. Beneath the plating was muscle and bone that flexed and moved. I stumbled and fell into the wash of blood, scrambling to get away from Pandaemonium-Mary, who was reaching out for me. If she touched me, I was certain something worse than death would happen.
I awoke, stumbled out of bed and barely made it to the wastebasket, throwing up the entire contents of dinner. It barely helped. My head pounded, and my stomach was turning in knots. In my head I could still see Pandaemonium reaching for me. Still see the roiling horror of conjoined, writhing limbs and torsos, desperate pleading faces subsumed one into another.
I heard my name spoken and I startled, looked up. Mary was crouched near me, just out of reach. She said my name again, asked me if I was all right. It was so strange, and so normal, both her concern and the spreading stain of red on her dress. I told her honestly about the dream, and she coaxed me into the bathroom to rinse out my mouth and wash my face, and then sent me back to bed. I think most of that was a second dream. I donât think I could have confided in her so readily. And surely if Mary were going to haunt someone, it would be Chrono.
In another dream, there was a woman in a field, rocking a cradle and singing a disturbing lullaby, one of the ones that were more threat than entreaty that the baby sleep. Not far away was a cabin, with a little garden, chicken coop and sheds. I knew a great deal about her, without knowing who she was. Â She and her husband were both leatherworkers and trappers, that is, they both did the work, but the business was in his name. They lived a few miles from a small town that barely deserved the designation.
Sheâd been pregnant. Her husband was dead and the cabin was in flames. She had never known her children. She had never sung them lullabies, threatening or otherwise. She sang to corncob dolls with little leather horns and braided grass tails pinned to their heads.
I watched the cabin burn, my sword in one hand, a severed head cradled in my other arm. My armor was splattered with blood and smeared with soot and dust. Â I could still hear the lullaby. (Armless winged horror; face straining with some unknowable effort, yet her eyes were closed as if she slept and only dreamed of that effort.) Â
That dream was even more disturbing.
Oddly enough, I also had a dream of Kadros. I think we were talking about the life-draining creatures, though the conversation went in a strange direction. There was a member of the Magdalen Order there, and I think I was trying to find out about the Legionnaire Project from him. He said he didnât know anything, but he was hooked up to a strange, complicated looking device, hoses socketed into ports embedded along his spine.
âHe really doesnât know anything about the Legionnaire Project,â Kadros says. âBeyond the fact that there is only one survivor.â
âWas, isnât it?â I said.
âIs, I should think,â the Magdalen Order exorcist said with frown. âHad quite a fall, but heâs very tough.â
âHow do you know any of this?â I asked.
âThe question is more how do you know any of this,â Kadros said. âErskine just muddles along grabbing randomly usually.â
âIâve been getting better!â The exorcist protested.
Kadros made an exasperated gesture taking in the vague, foggy landscape that was part one of the parlors in Eden, and part the dining room of a small house. Â
âThese dreams Iâve been having are because of him?â I asked, more than a little annoyed, though in a strangely distant way.
âWas he actually in any of them? Or me? Erskine isnât allowed to leave me behind anymore,â Kadros said.
âI donât need the likes of you to nursemaid me,â Erskine said, glowering at the Pursuer.
âChloe Vines,â Kadros said slowly and carefully. Whatever the name meant caused Erskine to flush and the muscles in his jaw to tighten.
âIâm sure this is a very private conversation I shouldnât be hearing,â I said, and then I woke up.
Iâm not sure if the last dream was something that actually happened (for values of âhappeningâ that mean some sort of out of body experience or long distance communication), and Iâve been somewhat reluctant to confess the matter of the dreams to Shader, or attempt to confirm that the dream was actual communication with Kadros and his ally. (Iâve also been reluctant to tell her about the nightmares. Iâm not certain there is anything she can do, and I donât want to worry her.) Â
Iâm going to be going on a scavenging expedition. Rosette I think wanted to go with me, if only to relieve her boredom. (There has been little for her to do except exercise, but she is not ready for an expedition of this nature at this point.) Joshua was also disappointed. I confess to being a little worried to leave them alone on Eden with just Shader. Weâre going to be crossing over the Great Lakes and into Canada, and from there into New York. Iâm not sure what weâll find when we get there. Iâm not even sure Chrono somehow made it back to New York. Itâs only a feeling, but I feel very strongly that weâll find him there. Â
The Christophers are arguing, and Iâve been strictly warned by Shader to stay out of it. Joshua is angry that Chrono failed to protect Rosette, and that she made the contract with Chrono. Rosette is angry because Joshua is angry about Chrono. Sheâs also angry because Joshua appeared to defend my actions.
(He hadnât, really. He attempted to mediate between myself and Rosette while we were arguing. She took the attempt badly, and they started arguing. When I attempted to intervene Joshua took it badly, and Rosette took it even worse because Joshua said, âMaster, go away, let me handle this.â So I left to Rosette screaming at Joshua about not needing to be handled and that Joshua wasnât my slave.)
That was two days ago, and I am tempted to toss them both into the nearest water collection tank. They have both settled into a sullen sort of silence and glares, so at least itâs quieter. I donât see how mediating between them would have been a bad idea, but I am willing to respect Joshuaâs request that I not interfere.
Shader is continuing the broadcasts, and has actually been in contact with various small communities. Weâve also picked up some broadcasts by remnants of the Magdalen Order. They make dire pronouncements about trusting the advice of demons. Theyâve been generally offering assistance, but very little in the way of information/education. There have also been a few direct threats that Iâm going to have to address at some point.
Shader wants to drop radios. I donât think we have the resources to make as many radios as she would like. Sheâs also scheduled music and other audio programming, as if she were running a radio station. Joshua seems enthused by the idea of a radio station, Rosette bemused. Â
(Shader is still in contact with Kadros and his allies, which is not as upsetting as I would have thought. One of his allies is a defector of Physician rank, and heâs apparently willing to tutor Shader.)
I am continuing the harvest of the garden rooms, and the chicken flock is doing well.
I have been debating acquiring horses. The garage we used for a stable is still intact. (Mostly because of Genai, he was ridiculously fond of the creatures.) We wonât be able to find gasoline for much longer, and while we could alter the truck and van to run on other fuels, it might be more economic to use horses. On the other hand, I would have to teach Joshua and Rosette how to ride.
Rosette approached me during one of my rest periods. I was in the music room, playing with a ragtime composition Iâd been working on intermittently, and I think she was drawn in by the music. âYou play the piano?â she asked sounding startled.
âNo, Rosette, itâs a player piano,â I said, turning to face her.
She flushed. âI thought you were Joshua.â
âWere you looking for him?â
âNo, just exercising.â She looked a little upset, as if remembering she was angry both at Joshua and myself. She glanced at my notes and the music. âI didnât think youâd play the piano.â
âI play several instruments,â I said. âClarinet, guitar, organ, piano.â Â
âWhy?â She asked.
âBecause I like music,â I said patiently. âAnd because the only way to amplify and direct as much astral energy as I needed to raise Pandaemonium was through the Oratorio I composed.â
Rosette snorted. âOh. You composed that thing? I guess I shouldn't be surprised, it was so overdramatic and stuffy...â
I admit to being stung by Rosetteâs comment. âI really don't think you're qualified to critique my music, Miss Christopher,â I said.
âI don't need to know how to play to know what something sounds like, do I?â Rosette asked.
âI mean, I'm questioning your musical taste, if it exists, and your bias,â I said.
Rosette glared. âI have musical taste!â
âI doubt that,â I replied. âAlso, youâre biased.â
Rosette made an indignant sound. âOkay, Iâm biased, but I do too have musical taste!â She named bands and singers, and we somehow ended up discussing music for the next hour.
Joshua had an asthma attack this evening, possibly exacerbated by dust (he was cleaning air filters) and pushing himself too hard and insisting he was fine. Rosette fussed, Joshua snapped, and then Shader went off into a tirade. âAsthma is not psychosomatic, it is not a mental illness, and if it were a mental illness it wouldnât make Joshua any more or less fit than any other human.â She then went into a thunderous rant about human medicine with side trips into her feelings about eugenics and Social Darwinism that left the Christopher siblings staring.
âShayshay, I thought we were supposed to let the Christophers sort each other out,â I say when she finally winds down.
Shader glared at the old nickname, her ears back and tail twitching. âDonât call me that,â she snapped.
âShayshay?â Rosette asked.
âShay means âbusyâ in a âreally curious and sticking your nose into thingsâ kind of way,â Joshua explained. âLike a little kid.â
âJoshua!â Shader protested indignantly.
âShe was really active as a child,â I said. âChrono and I were given the job of watching over her in hopes of keeping us out of trouble and learning responsibility. She was about six, we were about ten.â
Rosette looked baffled. âItâs really hard to imagine you as a little kid.â
âHeâd look just like Chrono, Rosette,â Joshua said.
âI know, but still,â she said, frowning. âItâs just really weird.â
âThey were great big brothers,â Shader said. âWhen they werenât making up stupid nicknames.â
âStupid nicknames you earned,â I said.
âUrgh,â Shader said. âIâm sorry about the outburst,â she said. âI found something out about something that happened to a friend a few days ago. It was pretty bad, and you two kind of reminded me of it.â
Joshua apologizes, Rosette asks about what happened. Joshua points out that whatever it is, Shader might not want to talk about it. This almost starts the arguments back up again, but Shader interjects with, âNo, itâs okay Joshua. It was something he told me about, but I donât think itâs really private, just awful.â
âAnd we reminded you of it?â Joshua asked.
Shader nodded. âKind of? I mean your situation and his isnât really similar but justâŠâ She makes a gesture with her hands. âThe concept that the sick or crippled are a waste of resources. The way people get locked up in attics or worse. People being sterilized because ignorance and a lack of resources is the same as being mentally limited because if they were intelligent they wouldnât be poor.â She took a breath. âAnd Iâm going to start ranting again.â
She took another breath. âOkay. Once upon a time there was a family of sorcerers who were very rich. They very strongly supported various eugenics laws, and then something terrible happened. Something was very wrong with their son. He stopped speaking, he became overwhelmed easily, he stopped making eye contact. The slightest of changes in daily activities could upset him. Since he had previously seemed to be precociously bright, this was very upsetting to the family. They wanted to hide this strange illness because it would be a scandal to have a child like this.â
âIt probably would have been better for them to lock him in an attic or put him in an institution somewhere and forget about him than what they did do. They used sorcery, and began controlling him like a puppet. Spells to make him act ânormal,â a demon to pull the strings and make him seem like the bright little boy they remembered him as. And it seemed to work, and they almost forgot about the spells and how they had imprisoned their son in his own body. How they turned a demon into his nursemaid. Then the world ended, and the spells broke.â
âThe demon broke free?â Rosette guessed.
âNo, they both did,â Shader said. âGalley and the demon broke free, and neither of them remembers what happened to the family, but they are pretty sure there was a fire, because Galley was badly burned.â Â
Rosette looked horrified, so did Joshua. âAre they okay now?â Rosette asked.
Shader nodded. âYes. Theyâve been through a lot, but theyâre better. They have friends, they have a community. But Iâm still upset about it, so Iâm sorry I blew up.â
âKadrosâ allies?â I asked.
Shader nodded again. âTwo of them, anyway,â she said.
âYouâre getting along with them very well,â I said.
She shrugged. âTheyâre nice people, even if Kadros is a Pursuer.â
Rosetteâs mobility has improved greatly, though sheâs relying on a walking frame that allows her to sit when she becomes tired. The frame has not impeded her curiosity, and she has taken to exploring Eden. Joshua occasionally joins her on these jaunts in crutches, though Shader has been keeping him busy with various chores that can be completed with limited mobility. (Mostly quality control on âhomemadeâ components meant to replace worn down or broken components. Very little knowledge is required to do this, aside from the specifications of the components, and operating the devices to test the components.)
Except for working with Rosette, and meal times, I have mostly avoided the Christopher siblings, and they for the most part seemed content with avoiding me. I was therefore a little surprised to find Joshua hovering in the doorway of one of the rooms for the gardening project, watching me pick corn. I came to a stopping point on the row, and set the basket down. âHello, Joshua,â I said. âDid you need something?â
I sensed that this question wasnât really the one he wanted to ask. He was working up to something, something that I realized I had been waiting for. Anger, confusion, the strongest maledictions he could think of, perhaps. âI was badly injured. Shader cut it off because she didnât want to deal with the mess.â
âHow badly injured?â Joshua asked. âI would have thought you nearly indestructible.â Â
âThe sword was broken, so I wasnât able to regenerate. The Astrallines were disrupted, and still are to some extent, so it took longer for me to heal. I was in one of the regeneration tanks for six months.â
Joshuaâs hands clenched on his crutches, in some burst of emotion that I still couldnât read. âWhat are you going to do now?â
âShader explained, didnât she?â I asked. âWeâre going to find Chrono.â
âYou didnât get what you wanted,â Joshua said. âThis isnât the world you wanted. You wanted to destroy everything.â His voice was shaking with what I could now identify as anger.
âI know,â I said. I was confused, a little. I couldnât guess at how he was angry, but I could sense that he was confused too. âIt didnât work out the way I planned. Plans can fall apart.â I smiled, and knew I shouldnât have done it. I also shouldnât have said, âI suppose Duffau was right in the end, I was playing, and shouldnât have come to the battle.â
Joshua went red. âGoddamit Aion!â he shouted âI trusted you. I believed you, but it was just a game to you, wasnât it? You donât care about anything, do you?â Â
I was even more confused. âYou agreed with your sister and Chrono at the end, didnât you? You shifted your allegiance.â
âI wanted you to not kill my sister,â Joshua said. âI wanted you to listen to me.â
âThere isnât a cure, Joshua,â I said, something in my chest clenching tightly again. âThere wasnât, and I had to destroy Pandaemonium. I had to. It wasnât a game, and I canât apologize because in absence of anything I could have done differently, anything beyond pure hope and faith when I had neither, Iâd have done the same thing.â
âHope and faith seemed to work for Rosette,â Joshua snapped. âGod. Why did I believe you, what made me think you were right, and that destroying everything was a good idea. Why did I ever trust you?â
âYou could hear Her too,â I said. âThat would have been part of it.â
âI was out of my mind.â
âSo was I, Iâm afraid,â I said. âI donât think any of us were sane, really. Are saneâ
Joshua glared at me, but laughed at the same time, a breathless, bitter sound. âThatâs almost an apology.â
âItâs an explanation. This world is so terrible, Joshua,â I said. âAnd all I could see it as was a reflection of the System I couldnât escape. As if it, or She were the cause of all that was terrible universally.â Â
âYou hold humans in so much contempt, that you canât even imagine them doing good or evil on their own terms, there has to be some other party responsible,â Joshua said, still angry, but tired now. Â
âThatâs usually the place my kind is put in,â I pointed out. âI just trusted the premise as being accurate and factual. My kind are predators, and its right that we be seen as what we are.â
ââYou have nowhere you can go,ââ Joshua quoted. âI donât think you tried hard enough. Why would you even listen to that monster, or believe anything She said was true?â
âWe were a handful of children,â I said. âShould we have tried to conquer with Pandaemoniumâs Pursuers at our heels?â
âMaybe you should have,â Joshua says with a reckless gesture that loses him one of his crutches. He flails a bit, and balances with the remaining crutch. âI remember you being so angry about injustice, unfairness. You told me about things it wouldnât have occurred to me were wrong until you explained why it was wrong. Maybe you could have made a better world out of what was right in front of you.â
âI doubt we would have been any better,â I said, thinking of Rizelle and Genai.
âYou could have been, if you wanted to,â Joshua said. âI donât think you wanted to.â
âThings areâŠclearer now,â I said in reply. âBut I can still only move forward.â I retrieved his crutch and handed it to him.
âGoddammit Aion,â Joshua said again, more softly this time. He took the crutch from me, and settled his arm into the cup, his hand on the handle. âIâm glad youâre helping Rosette,â he said, voice a little more firm, like he was trying to sound like an adult. âEven if itâs for your own reasons.â A sharp, angry breath. âEven if itâs to find Chrono.â
âYouâre angry with him, as well,â I said.
âThat would cover it, if spread thin,â Joshua said, and left the room.
Joshua is awake. He is also convalescent due to having broken his ankle during the initial chaos of Pandaemoniumâs destruction. I let Shader handle the debriefing once he had awakened. Given our last interaction, I felt strangely reluctant to speak with him. Once Joshua had eaten and gotten dressed, he was set up in his old room, and then taken to see Rosette.
I allowed them some time alone together. They spent the time talking. Rosette talked about her and Chronoâs life with the Magdalen Order, Joshua about what he remembered of his time on Eden and in California. Joshua showed Rosette how to use the computer in her room and got into the security feeds to give Rosette a âtourâ of Eden. Rosette seemed disturbed by the security system, seeing the cameras as an invasion of privacy.
âLook, there were exorcists patrolling the grounds at the abbey, right? Itâs just like that, except you donât have to do as much walking,â Joshua said.
âWell, no one was going into peopleâs rooms, or the dorms or something,â Rosette grumbled. âHe could be watching us right now!â
âI wouldnât be too surprised if he was,â Joshua said.
âAre you okay with that?â Rosette asked.
âIâm notâŠnot okay with it,â Joshua said. âThe security systems on the ship and at the house kept us safe from Pursuers for the most part. And sometimesâŠI needed to be kept an eye on.â
(I did cut the feed after that. I had been drawn to watch by the camera and sound pickups activating due to keywords and elevated vocal tones.)
Once they had some time together, I elected to join them for dinner. Dinner was a bit awkward, Joshua was tense at first, and Rosette was hostile. Rosette was horrified to learn that sheâd been eating meals I had prepared. Joshua, with a great deal of amusement asked her who she thought had been cooking. Rosette indicated that she thought Shader had been cooking.
âHey, I can do at least that much!â Shader said indignantly.
âIâve seen you eat chicken soup out of the can, without even heating it up,â Joshua said.
âSo? I can cook some things!â
Today was Rosetteâs first training session. She was initially hostile, but went eventually followed my directions. Stretching exercises were involved, followed by standing, and then some attempts at walking. There was some discussion during this time, mostly questions about when I was going to wake her friend and the other children up. I explained that Eden couldnât support them yet. This led to her wanting to know about leaving Eden. I explained that other places were worse off.
Interestingly, she did not ask about, or mention the Order. I questioned her about this, and she was very reluctant to respond at first, but then she said, her shoulders hunching, âthey were going to execute him. They ordered Father Remington to do it. Because of what happened in San Francisco.â
âI see. I could see why youâd be hesitant to contact them,â I said. âI wouldnât stop you from leaving, but consider the fact that Eden is a mobile base of operations that you would be able to work from. Weâve been working on making it more self-sufficient, due to the lack of infrastructure.â
Rosette looked very much like she wanted to comment at length on that, but didnât say anything.
âBut if you are very determined to leave, the only other place that might be a comparable base of operations would be a town and farming community under the control of a Pursuer. You might be able to make an alliance with him.â
âA Pursuer?â Rosette asks. âA Pursuer took over a town?â
âFrom what I understand, he took over protection of the community.â
âProtection racket,â Rosette muttered. âHow are you on friendly terms with a Pursuer?â
âI never said I was on friendly terms with him,â I said. âWe just have a mutual agreement to not kill each other. And hardly a âprotection racket.â But he seems to have a number of allies who are actively assisting the community, so theyâre doing better than other communities Iâve seen, and might be willing to help you.â
âYouâll let me take Joshua and the others?â Rosette asks, suspiciously.
âJoshua can go where he wants,â I said. âSeveral of the children are too injured to move, and might be a burden on the community. You and Joshua, and perhaps your friend Azmaria would be best able to enter the community, if you were to make contact.â
âI donât know.â
âJust another possibility to consider,â I said.
âYeah, but you want me to help you find Chrono,â Rosette said.
âAnd you would be,â I said. âWe just wouldnât be directly allied.â
ââAllies,ââ Rosette said. âYou donât have allies, just marks and goons.â
âShader is not a mark or goon. Neither is Joshua,â I said. âNone of the others were âgoons,â for that matter.â
Rosette scoffed, and was generally suspicious, but she asked more questions about options, and then talked to Joshua about it.
I dreamed of Chrono again. I dreamed that I was Chrono, and I was wandering through an abandoned farmhouse. It hurt to breath, and my vision was blurry in one eye and nonexistent in the other. The dream somehow got tangled up with the plot of The House on the Borderland and I fought Swine Things while trying to get to Mary, (âmyâ Mary, not the Recluseâs sister) who was trying to tell me how to defeat the monsters. It seemed to involve driving them into the lake, which was full of a heavier-than-air fog. In the fog were strange winged shapes, something like fish, and something like birds. (So the dream was also combined with The King in Yellow. )
Iâve made some progress on Maryâs diary, though itâs mostly that I was able to identify some of the plant sketches. Shader is extremely interested in the diagrams and sketches. By extremely interested, I mean she stole the diary so she could get copies of the sketches and diagrams and raved about Maryâs intuitive understanding of technology. (I was never entirely sure how much of Maryâs âunderstandingâ was her native intelligence, and how much was the result of her preternatural gifts.)
Iâm curious about the diary, and what she might have been attempting to hide. She was closely watched and âprotectedâ by her keepers, and I think she had very little time to herself. Everything she said or did examined closely for meaning, every word written down and analyzed. She was their passive oracle without the fumes. Her first active use of her powers was to aid Chrono and escape her gilded cage and then later, helping us find Pandaemoniumâs head. Perhaps this diary was simply her way of carving out a bit of privacy for herself; a work that was only hers, instead of for other people. (If thatâs so, I wonder if I should feel a little guilty to pry as if the diary was simply a puzzle to solve.)
Rosette awakened Saturday evening, and was in something of a panic at first: she awoke early and tried to disconnect herself from her life support system. She was not able to get into any mischief; sheâs not yet able to walk. Shader was able to talk her down and safely disconnect her from the machines. Then she was moved to the room that had been set up for her use. (I made a special point of reminding Shader not to give her a room that had access to the outer catwalks.) Shader brought her food and convinced her to eat. Then she at least partially convinced her to stop trying to take off the bracelets and necklace. (They are at least half the size of Fiâs cuffs and the collar has been replaced by a necklace similar to the prototype astral collector that Shader uses.)
Shader explained the cuffs and the nature of the changes that had been made. She was completely horrified, but Shader managed to talk her down again.
I waited until Rosette had recovered and had a chance to sleep, before making an appearance. Rosette was less than pleased by my presence and immediately launched into a flurry of demands, questions and accusations. I explained the situation in detail, giving her a complete outline of events. As I spoke, I watched her grow quieter, more horrified and paler, her hands knotting up in the blankets of her bed. âEverythingâs gone,â she said. âEverything. YouâŠâ she trailed off and leveled a glare at me. âIâm going to kill you.â
âNot everything,â I told her. âYour brother, your friend Azmaria, the other children. Chrono.â
âYou killed him! He died trying to stop you!â
âNo,â I said. âI never said he was dead. I have no reason to believe he isnât still alive.â
âSo Iâm bait? Thatâs why Iâm still alive?â Rosette asked.
âNo, youâre going to help me find him.â
âSays you,â Rossete spat.
âSays me,â I said.
âYou think Iâm gonna let you get another shot at him?â Rosette asked. âOver my dead body!â
âIâm glad youâve accepted the possibility of his survival,â I said.
âYouâre crackers. What do you want with him, anyway? Heâs not gonna fold on your say so and be your stooge, even--even if youâre holding me hostage.â
âNo, he made his point very clear,â I said agreeably. âAnd in the end, neither of us got what he wanted. But I still need to move forward, and I canât do that without Chrono.â
Rosette gave me the strangest look at that point. I could sense that I had struck a chord with her somehow. âWhat do you want with him? Why do you--?â
âYou want to find him too donât you?â I asked. âHeâs out there somewhere. You saw what he did to himself. Heâs still alive but heâll most likely be crippled by the corrupted Legion. That might not matter in the short term, heâs very powerful, but in the long term it will just get worse. Thereâs a small percentage of a chance that he might be able fix himself, but itâs a very small chance. Heâs going to need help.â
âAnd you want this outâve the goodness of your heart? Youâve turned over a new leaf?â Rosette asked with a great deal of skepticism.
âI want this because Chrono is still completely necessary,â I said. Rosette started glare, looked like she was going to say something along the lines of, heâs not your patsy or something similar. âNo, it doesnât matter that he wonât follow my lead,â I said. âHe doesnât have to. It was stupid of me to think--â I broke off. âThe situation is rolled up and Iâm cracked, but heâs still my brother, Miss Christopher.â
She gave me another strange look. âI donât trust you,â she said. âI donât know what youâre playing at.â She took a breath. âI need to think about this.â
âThereâs time,â I said. âAnd I have to get you back on your feet anyway.â
âLike hell,â she said.
I explained the situation: Rosette needed to essentially relearn how to walk and fight because her body was essentially ânewâ and needed to be retaught. She wasnât just weak and convalescent, she needed relearn everything. She was not happy to hear about this, and less happy to discover that I would be her primary teacher. She wanted to know why Shader couldnât do the âteachingâ and I further explained that Shaderâs primary job was keeping Eden in the air and that I was the only one who could be spared. She was somewhat mollified when I told her that we were also going to be waking up her brother within the next few days. Â
We are finally leaving the Magdelan Order abbey near St. Paul. St. Paul itself is a ghost town of only a few hundred survivors split into factions, and squabbling over the remaining resources. (The factions were easy to avoid, and we were able to acquire food, gasoline for the cars and van, and a new truck. The latter will need some work done on it when Shader gets the chance.)
There were no exorcists in either the city or the abbey, which was in ruins. This particular abbey was a major research and development center, and it appears that whatever the abbey was studying escaped containment and did away with the Magdalen Order scientists. After some investigating, I was able to determine that the exorcists were eventually able to put down the threat, but decided to retreat/consolidate their forces in Chicago and Franklin. (Needless to say, we will be avoiding those areas, though Chrono might be near Franklin.)
They took most of their library and equipment with them when they left the abbey. What was left were manuscripts and grimoires that I already owned copies of and equipment far inferior to anything we already had on Eden, or too broken to be useful. (This did not stop Shader from acquiring a number of devices that she wanted to take apart on her own time.) I was not able to find any useful information about the Legionaire program, though I did find a primitive device Shader thought might be an Astral collector. There was also a collection of Maryâs predictions, though a much older edition than the one I have. (It will be interesting to compare them.)
I also found what seems to be a diary. The writing is in sharp little wedge shapes and short lines, interspersed with a different script that was crossed lines, dots and curves and curved wedges. Itâs a thick book, with a simple strap and lock that I was able to foil rather easily. (I was reluctant to simply cut the strap.) Perhaps half of the diary is filled with the two scripts, the rest of the pages are either blank, or contain sketches. Of note: a biplane and other vehicles, leaves and flowers with little notes beside them in the wedge or crossed line scripts, buildings of various (human) architectural styles, odd little diagrams, peopleâŠand demons. Specifically, Sinners.
My feelings about the book with its peculiar scripts had been merely intellectual curiosity until that point. I realized that I was holding a diary written by Mary, and apparently hidden by her. It was an amazing find.
I took it back to Eden and ran samples of two scripts in the database. It looks like the wedge script is probably cuneiform, though I couldnât get a translation, because the cuneiform was also in code. I wasnât able to identify the other script, there were a few scripts in the database similar to it, but I wasnât able to get a positive identification for any of them. (And if I had, they would have been in code as well.)
I really wish Iâd paid more attention to my cryptography classes. Codebreaking was not my area of expertise, and Iâd been under the impression at the time that I simply needed to be in command of codebreakers, not be one myself. (The six of us hardly needed more than the usual pass codes in our operations anyway.)
This is of course very frustrating, but I have been continuing the project.
Meanwhile, Shader has been in off again/on again communication with the Pursuerâs allies. (They contacted her during one of her radio broadcasts.) I was not happy about this, but Shader felt it was necessary and important. They have been exchanging weather information, and data concerning the spread of Legion. She is very enthusiastic about their gardening/farming projects, and I have to admit some of their methods/efforts have been ingenious. (Barriers that trap heat covering several acres and essentially creating giant greenhouses for example. Something I had not had the opportunity to see from the air, due to being blocked by the Pursuerâs eagle.) She is also acquiring medical information from them. (One of their allies is a defector, a Physician.)
Shader eventually persuaded me to talk to the Pursuer again. I was not happy about this, but Shader was very persuasive. The conversation wasâŠvery surreal for me. Possible also surreal for him; here we were, not trying to kill each other. (When we first âmetâ he seemed more inclined to question me first. So perhaps he was already disinclined to kill.) It was easier to speak to the Pursuer due the barrier of distance, and not actually seeing him.
The substance of the conversation was that he wanted to know why. Not just âwhy destroy Pandaemonium?â but also âwhy were the Sinners ordered to be culled?â Those wereâŠdifficult questions for me to answer, though I was able to communicate my reasoning more coherently than in our previous encounter. He asked questions, and I could hear that he was attempting to keep control of what had to be considerable anger.
âI should hunt you down,â the Pursuer says at the end of explanations. âWhy donât you tell me why I shouldnât?â
âYou Pursuers have never managed to capture any of us before. Thereâs no reason youâd be able to now,â I said.
âThere is that,â the Pursuer says. âI think your numbers have shrunk as much as ours have though.â
âAnd after all the technical and medical information youâve shared with my subordinate?â I ask him, a little mockingly. âYouâd try to come after us?â
âNot the technician. Whatever sheâs guilty of, sheâs trying to make amends. Just you,â the Pursuer says. âWhatever the Elders thought happened during your Initiation, whether or not I think they overreacted. Whether or not destroying our only home was the right decision to make. You are ultimately responsible.â
âI in no way deny responsibility,â I say in return. âI only regret my efforts were not completed to my satisfaction. That the better world I wanted did not manifest itself. You say you want a reason not to Pursue, and I canât give you one, unless you value the little territory youâve carved for yourself. Tell me why I shouldnât destroy your little kingdom and your allies?â
âI am not a warlord,â the Pursuer says. âI am not creating a âkingdomâ Iâm protecting a community I and my friends have chosen to assist. These are my people, and Iâm going to continue protecting them, and if protecting them means continuing my Pursuit of you, Iâm going to do it.â
It was like listening to Chrono. âI am not a threat to your community,â I say after a long pause. âIf you are not a warlord. IâŠI will not permit any hierarchy or class system to exist.â
In the background on the Pursuerâs end I heard: âA Bolshevik demon?â
I laugh. âAnarchist, actually.â
In the background: âGood God.â
The Pursuer mutters something away from the radio, presumable to the other speaker. (A name, and the words, âplease shut up, youâre not actually helping.â) To me he says, âI am not a warlord, if you want a fight, come after me and not my allies.â
âLikewise,â I say, and then, âI will avoid your territory.â
âOkay,â the Pursuer says after a long pause. âI wonât come after you.â
âGood.â
It wasnât the end of anything. I donât trust the Pursuer, and he certainly doesnât trust me. For now, weâll avoid the territory, and Iâll let Shader handle any communication.
Weâve received occasional contacts from Magdalen Order agents and small communities questioning Shaderâs radio broadcast. Weâve avoided giving away any concrete information on who we really are. Itâs really annoying how many Order strongholds remain, though they seem to be fairly isolated, struggling and dying due to the current environment. (On the other hand, it makes sense that they would be out there. The Magdalen Order is the largest and most organized of the various demon-hunting organizations in North America.)
If Rosette learns that the Order still exists, I am worried she will attempt going to them. Â
She is due to be woken up soon. I am hoping I can dissuade her from attempting to rejoin her old allies. (The part where they might attempt to vivisect her to find out how her new body works might be a key motivator to stay.)
I find I am looking forward to speaking to her again.
I am embarrassed about how much of a disaster my encounter with the Pursuer was.
Analysis of the encounter:
I was stupidly over confident. I am so used running rings around most Pursuers, that I forgot my own damn rules. (The first rule being, DONâT GET COCKY.)
I should have had back up. With knowing I didnât have back up, I should have kept to strict surveillance instead of pushing an encounter.
Kadros has allies, which I knew intellectually, since heâs put himself up as some kind of âprotector.â They are well organized, have good communication, and able to move quickly on what had to have been very short notice.
As I mentioned in the previous entry, Kadros is using some very advanced technology to detect and assess possible threats. I am very interested in finding out more about the technology heâs using, but canât at this point.
We lost the damn truck. We can get a new one, and we still have the van and the cars, but we lost the damn truck.
I am not happy that I completely lost my mind in front of a Pursuer. I have no idea why he didnât come after me.
I am not sure why being asked about the Rite of Tuning was so upsetting, or why I reacted in specifically that way. I know itâs a âdangerousâ area, and always has been, but Iâve never broke down when that area was trespassed before. Was I being influenced at that point? I know nothing about Kadros or his abilities, or about his allies and their abilities. Had Kadros or one of his allies seen something they shouldnât have? Again, I was stupidly overconfident.
After the encounter with Kadros, I fled the territory and was not pursued. I holed up for a day in an abandoned farm house. When I was confident I was not followed, and was not being tracked, I used concealment spells and made my way back to Eden. Shader seeing my condition, didnât say a word, but then she didnât have to. I was marched to the infirmary where she saw to my injuries (which were healing, though a few had to be reopened because of debris I hadnât been able to clean out) and made me eat heated soup and take pain killers and a sleep aid.
I dreamed about the Rite of Tuning, and the chaotic first days when we hid from the Pursuers in the lower levels of Pandaemonium. I dreamed about the escape, all the useless, hopeless deaths and the loss of Pandaemoniumâs head. In the dream I remember not caring, I remember knowing there was no escape. I remember not telling anyone about it because I couldnât. At the same time I could feel all of it, nothing was safe behind glass walls anymore. Everything that had been narrowed down to a single indomitable purpose came undone, and I woke up in a cold sweat remembering the voice telling me that I could talk now that Pandaemonium was dead.
I lay there for a while remembering the voice, and wondering if it had been one of Kadrosâ allies. I immediately dismissed the thought. It wouldnât have been phrased that way, if it had been one of Kadrosâ allies attempting to influence me. I wondered if theyâd understood anything of what Iâd said. Maybe Kadros hadnât gone after me because I was an object of pity, obviously completely mad and no longer a threat. (More likely, they didnât know if I had back up somewhere and hadnât pursued because they didnât want to run into more Sinners than they could handle.)
Further analysis and results of encounter and interrogation:
Kadros knows that at least one Sinner is still alive. This is not good, since at this point itâs just me and Shader and a lot of comatose children.
Instead of immediately attempting to kill me or extract information about the whereabouts of the others, he attempted to interrogate me about why my generation and those younger had been branded as Sinners destined for execution.
Kadros has some background information about why we were branded as Sinners, but wanted clarification and details.
I am not entirely clear of how much if anything Kadros understood of what I said. The previous entry contains most of what I remember saying, or reconstructions what I thought I said.
Kadros did not follow me, and after I woke up and remembered, I had Shader check me for any tracking devices that might have been planted during the battle. Of course this might be a waste of time if Kadros was able to tear anything off of me during the battle or use my blood.
I should therefore assume that Kadros can either find or observe me and take steps to block any attempts in that direction.
Kadros may or may not have an alliance with the Magdalen Order, or with members of the Magdalen Order.
We are continuing toward St. Paul and the Magdalen Order monastery there. Shader has been listening to the radio, but nothing seems to be coming from the city. We should probably avoid St. Paul simply because of the proximity to Kadrosâ âterritoryâ but this particular monastery is where they did extensive experimentation with demons and other lifeforms native to Pandaemonium. It might also be the monastery where the not-as-mythical-as-I-thought-it-was Legionnaire Project took place. Any information we can acquire about the interaction between Legion and living cells will be extremely valuable. Also, I feel a strange nostalgia, because it is also where Mary was kept.
Rosette is doing very well. The first surgery was a success, and her brain activity continues to be normal. Shader is working on a prototype for the astral collectors. The best I can say about them is that they do not look too much like restraints, and are about half the size Fioreâs were. Shader assures me this is just the first draft and she has design plans for more decorative collection units. I told Shader, âgood, show them too her once she calms down.â
âBoss, are you really that worried about her being upset?â Shader asked with a grin.
âIâm worried about her being uncooperative,â I replied. âWhich is more than likely.â
Shader patted my arm. âDonât worry, theyâll look great. I already had something new in mind forâŠfor Fi.â Her smile faded at that.
âFi is next on the list of people to find after Chronoâ I told Shader.
âShe just disappeared, Boss,â Shader said. âI think she might be--â
âI donât believe sheâs dead,â I said firmly. âI would have felt if she was dead. Iâm not as sensitive as Chrono is, but Iâm sure sheâs alive. We just need to find her.â
Shader straightened up a little at that. âIf you say so, Boss.â
âI do say so,â I replied and we continued to talk about the new astral collectors and the next stage of Rosetteâs modifications.