Question: Are you going to be handsome forever, and never, ever require a mask to cover a hideous disfiguring scar?
Handsome Jack: Weirdly specific question. But yes.
Question: Handsome Jack, first of all thank you for doing this! What is your opinion of Wilhelm, Nisha, Claptrap, and Athena each individually?
Wilhelm: As far as monosyllabic cyborgs go, an okay dude. Seems pretty dense, easily led. Strongly considering poisoning him in the future in order to dupe my enemies into thinking they've won. Also considering accidentally forgetting to put that line of dialog into the game so it just ends up being super confusing and illogical.
Athena: Weird chick. Prides herself on "loyalty," but the only thing I know about her is that she killed her old boss and blew up his big house of guns. So, uh, yeah, super trust her. Sure she's a straight shooter.
Nisha: She's, uh -- I like her. She's nice. Well not -- not NICE, she's definitely not NICE, but she's got a...like, a thing? About her? That I like? I don't know. It's -- shut up. Next question. Shut up.
Question: How do you get your hair to look so perfect?
Handsome Jack: Genetics. And the tears of orphans.
Question: How did you ever get so handsome?
Handsome Jack: See? Everyone, look -- look at this.
THIS is a question. Not "wuhgughf what if butt stallion and gugh torgue fought would that be fugughgh fun", not "wharglbhrrh new u stations wharhgh canon."
Just short, direct, and so complimentary that I got to half mast before I'd reached the third syllable.
Be like this guy. Or girl.
Hopefully girl. I'm into girls. Which evidently makes me some sort of outlier on Pandora.
Question: Would you fight 1000 Midget-Sized Warriors or 1 Warrior-Sized Psycho?
Handsome Jack: 1 Warrior-Sized Psycho. I think you're severely underestimating the deadliness of Pandora's little people.
More questions for Handsome Jack? Add in your comments below!
