Sanctuary

A true femcel that's got the whole package of bpd, ed and sh! ‿̩͙⊱༒︎༻♱༺༒︎⊰‿̩͙‎‎ ‎

[borderlinesanctuary]

I wanna see her smile once more.

[borderlinesanctuary]

I hate my job, I'm fucking miserable, I only want to cut so deep it wont ever fucking heal. I am a fucking scholarship student. I deserve better than this. What did I do wrong to have to cry myself to sleep every fucking night. My libido is at an all time low, this is a good way to get new scars, I hate it here. My psychologist is gonna have a field day tomorrow.

[borderlinesanctuary]

Red wine is a bitch. My head hurt so bad I had to force myself to throw up for the first time in a while.

[borderlinesanctuary]

I am a sick person... I am a spiteful person. I am an unattractive person. After everything I am a bad person

[borderlinesanctuary]

God scars itch like a bitch just before they heal

[borderlinesanctuary]

Rawdogging multiple crisises without meds is fucking crazy. I'm falling apart I'd love to be on xans right now. I wanna give up. I don't wanna be me. My identity is compromised. My self image is compromised. My academic performance is compromised. My whole life is coming crashing down on me.

[borderlinesanctuary]

Having no morals but a lot of empathy is wacky. Like yeah I wanna sleep with them but I won't, I like my partner.

[borderlinesanctuary]

This fucking gay twink. I hate him and his disorganized attachment style. I hate him and his disdain for human connections. I hate him and his hubris. I hate him and his genius. I hate him because he's me.

[borderlinesanctuary]

I did it again, god I forgot how good that felt.

[borderlinesanctuary]

No matter how productive I may be. At the end of the day, I'll always hate myself.

The absurd number of jewelry I make cannot erase my failures as a person.

[borderlinesanctuary]

Impostor syndrome is kicking in hard... For a gifted kid, I'm grossly underqualified. For normal students, I'm grossly overqualified. I don't fit in with anybody; I exist only within limbo. I'm not close to anyone, but people still hang out with me.

[borderlinesanctuary]

I've stopped recognizing myself in the mirror... I just don't look like myself.

[borderlinesanctuary]

I will win, even if it's only through sheer spite. I will have control over my life, even if it kills me. I will be free.

[abyss-fmpf11kvp6-deactivated202]

"your grades are dropping"

hahahahahahaha that's the umpteenth time you've told me this when will you ever learn that i don't care hahahahahahahahahahahahaha you're so funny please go away hahahahaha

[borderlinesanctuary]

Nietzsche, Nietzsche... God is dead. And I'm desperately trying not to think about it. If the self becomes the object of worship, then it's just over for all of us. How did one man, a hundred years ago, predict events of today? I cannot let myself fall into the trap of the self. I, I just want to be a good person.

[borderlinesanctuary]

Why am I like this? Why am I this pretty? Why can't I be as kind as I am attractive? I'm a parasite. I fuck up every relationship I physically can. I'm never satisfied. When I'm in a relationship, I crave freedom, and when not, I crave commitment.

[borderlinesanctuary]

This is the most I've cried ever. Still in single digits of tears though. I feel like shit and my stomach is turning inside out what the fuck.

[borderlinesanctuary]

I coincidentally got invited to a coffee, like 10 minutes later. I was fine the moment I stepped out of the house.