[xlivingproofx-deactivated202404]

I’m actually really fun once you get to know me (takes 3-4 years).

[anxeious]

[exitwound]

I always am about to go to sleep at a beautiful 11pm and then something happens to me

[xeppelinsfw]

gotta take this stupid ass piss before going to bed

[valtsv]

all emojis need an eyebags option

[valtsv]

[cannibalchicken]

[3000s]

the human mind wasnt made to comprehend 30 dollars

[byjove]

there’s a fat bear roaming around the area I live in every night and everyone keeps posting ring footage of him

[byjove]

he’s just meandering in all the footage, not knocking over trash cans or doing anything, just walking for his health I guess

[tredlocity]

Fake clickbait headlines from The Good Place.

[foreveriallyzombified]

you do NOT want to be a vampire. sit down. you do NOT long for the night. you have seasonal depression. you would miss garlic too much. you would get killed by other vampires because you do NOT have the social skills required to keep up the ruse. BE REALISTIC.

[hotvampireadjacent]

🦕🦖

I miss them so much every fucking day it isn’t fair they’re gone. RIP dionsauirs I miss you so much I’m fucking crying. We could have been friends and I could have used the long neck as a slide. IT ISNT FAIR

[cannibalchicken]

[zangoonse]

i love the phrase "cruel and unusual." not only is what you're doing mean but it's also quite frankly fucking bizarre

[toskarin]

guy who is definitely not about to fall into a surprise midday nap with an aftermath worse than a hangover: it seems like a really good idea to lay in bed and get cozy under the blanket as part of my plan not to fall asleep. I do not know why.

[cannibalchicken]

[serial-unaliver-deactivated2024]

"how was work" carries the same energy as "how was school"

[andrasandreas]

This is my favorite meme thing I've seen for that:

[testosteronetwunk]