"SO WE RISE TO THE CHALLENGE, KNOWING VICTORY IS ALREADY OURS."
-Rebecca Ross
independent and selective multimuse blog of various franchises. penned by spencer, she/they. 25+. minors dni. non rp blogs dni.
oc, crossover, duplicate friendly. please read rules and muse list before interacting. all canon muses, but heavily headcanon and au-based. all muses are well into adulthood.
due to personal reasons, i have died over the past few days (i've been practically bed-bound because of an illness), and i will continue to be so for the next couple of days (still feel like hell has descended upon me)
spoilers from ep 13, but i've been stewing on it all day and i'm just really hyped
so i'm writing a fanfic on ao3 where basically i call out the 4th wall breaks (in character, not griping about them), because they HAVE to be canon, especially now that TDL is taking over rocket corp in his own twisted "the virus is now mind controlling everyone" way.
because tell me how else he A. knew about mitsi's death to begin with and B. how he was able to use victim's past torture from alan against him as a way to kill him.
when alan was torturing victim, the straw that broke the camel's back was alan erasing victim as he was reaching for help that would not come. TDL used that exact moment to kill victim as victim was reaching for mitsi to help. it all proved fruitless in the end.
that tells me that TDL has always been watching, and i mean that literally. he was watching and scrutinizing past episodes. he was paying attention to the lore and the series, and using his role in the previous arc between himself and chosen to better his chances of surviving. instead of letting orange walk free in his presence, he made sure orange, and by extension, the color gang could not actually escape.
i also feel like dark KNEW the whole time that the CG was hiding amidst the warehouse clones. we know who they were because of the dots on their foreheads, but i have a feeling that dark also knew. victim was his puppet the second they formed the alliance, and dark was able to manipulate all the events of 'the machine' just by being there. everything he wanted to happen, happened.
and now he has an army of mind controlled drones, victim and agent included, to do his bidding. the mercs, mitsi, color gang, orange, and even chosen are screwed.
but OHHH, i want so badly for chosen to power back up and finally kick ass after several episodes of being humiliated and tortured. we need THE CHOSEN ONE back, and it's long overdue, i think.
but honestly i'm really excited. this episode was so good. i was not mentally prepared for it, but i can feel myself falling headfirst back into this hyperfixation. and my love for the dark lord is never ending.
OKAY WELL I KNEW IT WAS DARK WHO KILLED MITSI. i feel so VINDICATED with the fandom screaming for months about how it was chosen, but that logic made zero sense, because chosen doesn't USE those fucking powers.
also dark using orange to revive people under his direct control? amazing. it's twisted, it's horrible, and it's so dark coded. my fave villain stays problematic, i love to see it.
ALSO MITSI GONNA SAVE THE DAY, I KNOW IT. she's going to either use that pencil to make victim remember, or she's going to figure out that orange can use it to undo what he can, cause orange is basically the animator in stick figure form.
i still wanna see more of what chosen is going through. i need him and orange to reunite cause they're BROTHERS, that is my interpretation and i will die on this hill.
this gives me LIFE, i have fuel, i may now actually have the motivation to continue my fic because this just re-awakened my fucking LOVE for this series.
ALSO ALSO, i love that the color gang is now working with the mercenaries when like an episode ago they literally fought each other. though with agent's life and memories being twisted the way they are thanks to dark's influence, and with chosen still being prisoner, i can't wait to see what happens next, and what allies will be formed through all this.
though what i really want to see ultimately is mitsi eventually coming down on victim like "how you acted was shitty, but you still my husband and i love you." like. i just wanna see a happy ending for victim, for once.
"tea it is then!" he waves away the coffee, something he'll drink later, and conjures up his own tea. he accepts the treat with a smile, before making himself comfortable. after a small nibble, sunny finds this to be an acceptable exchange of goods, and something probably much needed before he shares what exactly happened. the REAL story, so to speak.
"before i get into all the shameful details, i must warn you ahead of time that sylphrena is involved in part of this. she stepped in when maestro needed her, and for that i am eternally grateful. but everything before that, is quite the tale, and one that has me feeling protective."
he takes a sip of his tea, resting his staff across his lap. eventually, he'll work on a way to shrink or enlarge it as needed, but for the moment, it's resting across his legs, just enough contact given so that the staff's eye can still make out fanilana in some form.
clearing his throat, he lowers his cup. "it begins, when maestro went to luna's and sunflower's timeline to warn them about khaos. that's when primordial chaos showed up, and it took all three of them to seal primordial chaos up. at some point, maestro was lured there and trapped in the same cage, where he was tortured for who knows how long before i found out what was going on."
just the mere thought has his eyes narrowing all over again. to think one of the strongest cookies he knows of, being trapped with that beast. he moves a hand to grip the seat he's resting on, trying to keep himself grounded. "that's when i asked luna and sunflower for help."
don't mind sunny here, there's golden lightning crackling between his fingers as he listens to the sound of the current fight going on. always in support of his bluebird, of course.
why is it always our responsibility? you're allowed to just be.
... i will always love you.
❝ you're insane. ❞ the beast declares bluntly, his face still pressed against pure vanilla's shoulder. ❝ and an idiot. AND oh so very likely to get yourself killed in yet another doughbrained act of reckless martyrdom... do you even listen to the inspirational drivel that comes out of your mouth, or do you just have a habit of ad-libbing motivational word salad? ❞ he tightens his grip, claws poking through the fabric of his robes. is it really that simple? shadow milk's first instinct is to laugh in his face — seriously, what kind of blasphemous nonsense is sunny SUGGESTING? to live as perfectly ordinary cookies who just so happen to ALSO wield enough power to grind kingdoms to dust? even trying to frame it in his mind sounds ridiculous. shadow milk wasn't made to be just — a person. everything he has ever done has always been in the service of some grander narrative. to carry out the purpose he was assigned — to punish his creators for their negligence. to learn why he was burdened with this miserable existence to begin with.
... is it true? is she really gone? millennia spent putting on the greatest show earthbread has ever seen, and what did it ever amount to in the end? a sword in the chest, a troupe of absentee actors and an empty theatre. and he is no closer to answers than he ever was before. what a waste, what a waste. would it really be so terrible if he abandoned the stage to pursue a life free from any obligation of a grander purpose or responsibility?
or maybe... the ugly truth is shadow milk just doesn't know who he would be if he wasn't playing a character.
❝ you... ❞ the beast suddenly pulls away. he holds his other half at arm's length, a hand braced firmly on either shoulder. shadow milk bristles, mind racing as he tries to think of something cruel to say — compulsively, like an animal twisting to protect its vulnerable underbelly. after several tense seconds, he deflates with a soft, wounded whine. ❝ mnnh... ❞ pathetic. pathetic, pathetic, pathetic. he's pathetic — not because he can't think of something hurtful ( oh, shadow milk is never short on creatively worded venom ) but rather, because the idea of bringing harm to this particular cookie no longer holds any appeal. he... doesn't want to hurt pure vanilla. no, no. witches, it's even worse — the thought of his other half suffering at all is suddenly a point of discomfort, nearly as visceral as his own pain.
he swallows thickly. a hand raises, coming to settle on the cookie's cheek. shadow milk carefully traces the lines of his face as if touching him for the very first time — cheekbone, jaw, the slope of his nose. something inside of his chest unrelated to his injury clenches painfully. ❝ i suppose i wouldn't mind sharing my stage with the likes of you... ❞ the beast glances at his mouth. then, with a flash of heat rising in his face, looks away. ❝ you're... a decent costar. ❞
he slumps forward suddenly, trusting pure vanilla to catch him. ❝ carry me back to bed. ❞ shadow milk demands with a haughty sniffle. ❝ in case you've forgotten, i'm injured. ❞
all that said, and pure vanilla is a little confused. he THINKS he understands what shadow milk is actually trying to tell him ― amid the babbling and keeping him at arm's length, it seems as though shadow milk might also be saying i love you in their own way. but the entire whiplash of shadow milk going from incoherent babbling to this entire conversation has his head reeling. he feels like crying too, though pure vanilla isn't sure where that emotion is coming from. at the end of the day, he's just...
exhausted.
it'd been one thing after another for so long, and it's all leading to this moment where they can finally just exist. though he's not entirely sure if shadow milk had fully grasped it, but pure vanilla is going to give it a couple days before trying again. trying to be serious and not serious at the same time is only giving him a headache. but for his own sake, he's choosing to believe that maybe, somehow, he'd reached some part of shadow milk and the two have finally reached a mutual understanding.
"i haven't forgotten," he says, wrapping an arm around shadow milk. "you jumped out of bed out of nowhere though, i'm surprised you're able to remain standing." he smiles, swallowing the pain down again. it's not just about him. it's about both of them. pure vanilla can deal with his emotions later, sorting through this conversation and pulling it apart. he meant every single word he'd said, of course, but the adrenaline is wearing off, the moment's over, and it's back to reality, where the world keeps on turning for both of them.
"come along, bluebird. you still need sleep." so does he, which he WILL get, as soon as shadow milk is asleep. though hopefully this time, pure vanilla can sneak off to his own room and catch at least a couple hours of rest before returning to tend to shadow milk's injuries some more.
he walks shadow milk back to her bed, and carefully lowers her into it. "after we rest more, i would like to treat you to a meal," he offers. "no grand feast, but i'd like to cook for you. it's been some time since either of us had anything with substance, i believe, and it'd be good for the healing journey for us to have some. just name your favorite, and i'll see it done for you."
❝ ehe. ❞ all of his eyes look to the left. ❝ ahaha. ❞ all of his eyes look to the right. ❝ hehehe... ha... i have nooo idea what you're talking about... ❞ wasp room? what wasp room? the only thing he's moved into the palace is his piano ( and the minions ) — beast's honor!
shadow milk delicately clears his throat, before finally turning his gaze back to his other half. ❝ really? just like that? y'know, i had a whole three minute monologue prepared to argue my case — i'm a teensy bit disappointed i didn't get to use it! ❞ a little snicker hisses through his teeth. the beast leans forward, bonking their foreheads together. what? that's affection. ❝ kidding, kidding! say, has anyone ever told you how ATTRACTIVE you are when you're agreeable? or do i get to be the first? ❞ shadow milk bats his eyelashes, feigning innocence.
fortunately, the offer distracts him before he has a chance to lay it on too thick. ❝ huh. ❞ a slow blink. ❝ y'know, i am not usually one for collab-or-ating — my vision is very precise. in case you haven't heard, i am a perfectionist. ❞ he curls a fist under his chin. ❝ but... perhaps... how's about i make you my creative consultant, hmm? i will consider your input! most cookies don't get the privilege... ❞
"the only thing i request is that these wasps of yours do not sting me. i would be very sad if that happened."
he does fall silent when shadow milk comments on his agreeability. HAS he really been too accommodating to them? pure vanilla supposes that he could stand to tell shadow milk no once in awhile, but that doesn't exactly sound like a great time for either of them. he'd come too far in this relationship to let petty arguments really get the better of them.
though, being a consultant is something he can easily agree to, while on that topic. pure vanilla doesn't have the same exact taste as shadow milk does. his own color scheme tends to lean into lighter, warmer colors, whereas shadow milk leans darker and cooler. though, it's not like pure vanilla is going to turn that down either way. he remembers his brief stint as truthless recluse, and how comforting the night had seemed back then.
"stars," he comments simply. "i'd like to look up at the ceiling and see the night sky, and all the constellations within." he smiles. "otherwise, i trust your brand of whimsical."
❝ i'mmm... feeling! ❞ not telling him what. now, now — they may be engaging in this whole 'going steady' business, but letting good old silly vanilly peek behind the curtain ALL the time ruins the fun! shadow milk does offer him a grin, however — even leaning ever so slightly into the gentle touch. ooh, you want to say yes to whatever he asks so bad! ❝ i won't say no to your undivided attention — aff-ec-tion included. i deserve it! ... a-but that is NOT what i came here for, actually. ❞
a tentacle curls around the cookie's wrist, lightly caressing the line of his pulse. ❝ so, i was thinking... ❞ shadow milk begins innocently. ❝ i've been making myself comfortable in your humble abode for quite some time, now... 'tis nice! a bit rustic... ❞ you know. for a castle. ❝ buuut whaddya say i spice things up a little, hmm? let's say, a wing of the palace — just for moi? oh, it would help me feel RIGHT at home, it would! ❞
he definitely has NOT gotten a head start on that project already, by the by. there is no wasp room in the vanilla kingdom.
"ah, but my love, i already glimpsed behind the curtain," pure vanilla says, almost playfully. "i've seen what you've already started." he's not even disappointed that shadow milk hadn't asked him beforehand. as far as pure vanilla is concerned, since shadow milk had basically been living here for ages already, it's long past due he started bringing pieces of his home here for BOTH of them to enjoy.
"you don't need my permission to redecorate as you please," he continues. "this is, and has always been, your home too. i'm more surprised you hadn't started sooner, to be quite frank with you." his staff's eye lingers on the tentacle around his wrist, and pure vanilla practically melts under the returned affection. whether or not shadow milk is conscious of what their tentacles do, it's still nice to feel just as appreciated and even loved as he gives out.
"i would very much like to help, if i may," he offers. "otherwise, i shall stay out of your way and let your art speak for itself. though i'd love to see what it looks like when you've finished."
something i really enjoy about neil, or at least how i portray him, is how intelligent he actually is. hidden behind the paranoia and the need to keep walls up at all times is a very calculating guy, who can perceive someone's character by just watching them. his judgements aren't always accurate, but he's still incredibly smart and is able to make at least some judgements on what he can or can't trust/WHO he can or can't trust.
he can recognize when a situation is completely out of his control and he has no choice but to yield, but he can also recognize when his own actions will be the one to work in his favor.
also happening across the initial trilogy is his character development. we don't really see what he's like at first, even through his own pov, but over the course of the series, we really see neil go from a paranoid kid on the run to putting out his own hits on people to protect those he does care about to some extent, and wielding his influence like it's nothing.
it's smart. he's smart, he's learned from people and he can take all that information, both bad and good, and work it out to his favor. and i think that it's not often talked about because people like to focus on how much of a smart ass he is. which, i love that about neil! but he's also incredibly smart quietly too, and even when you don't realize it, he's always watching.
❝ Maybe you should care, in as much as you can learn from him. ❞ Jean is not personally familiar with the Butcher of Baltimore — he'd arrived after the man had stopped visiting the Moriyamas in person, though he's sure ( given the nature of his work for them and Kevin's haunted look at the mention of him ) that he's the kind of person who would understand the Moriyama way of things. Who would understand that you pay for your mistakes, however small they may seem to you, in blood.
That, Jean is intimately familiar with.
Neil is so frustratingly stubborn that Jean wants to scream. But he's learned to keep his anger in check and lets it come out only as testy bitterness — enough to mask the fear of what Neil's rash actions might bring upon them all.
❝ Your father knows how to play by their rules so they find him useful and keep him alive. Are you that prideful that you cannot do the same ? ❞ The declaration, though, gives him pause. If Riko wants to act against me —
Jean regards Neil with wild surprise. Has he not understood — ? ❝ It is not you he will act against. Not entirely. ❞ No doubt Riko will enjoy flaying his escaped prey alive, of course, but the lessons need to stick. ❝ He will come after anyone you care about. He will make you watch him hurt them and you won't be able to stop him. ❞ Kevin, his heart pulses around the name before Jean locks it away.
❝ I am trying to keep us alive. ❞ Jean can't stop the full body flinch when Neil so flippantly tells him you can get out too. Of course he cannot; he is a Moreau and as such, his place is at Evermore. Monetarily. Legally. In any way that matters. But he manages to scoff and school his expression back into harsh regard.
❝ If you think Kevin is truly free of Riko, you have not been paying enough attention. And that means you are not watching out for him the way you should be. ❞ A fierce protectiveness presses against the old scars of betrayal behind his ribs. ❝ This is hardly about the court, Josten, and it is not merely Riko you will contend with if you cross the Moriyamas. If you don't care about keeping yourself alive, care about the people caught in your crossfire. ❞
he's not sure whether or not he should heed jean's warning. but neil has the distinct feeling that there are two truths at play here: his own lived experience and the ―albeit flimsy― protection of his team, versus jean's fear of the moriyamas and the extensive ways in which they control him. neither one is going to actually win in the end, and it would only prove fruitless to try and argue any sort of sense into jean at this point.
maybe he should talk to kevin and andrew, see how they feel about trying to pull jean out of evermore. neil has a sinking suspicion that also wouldn't work in his favor. however bullheaded they both are, jean is obstinate as hell, and would only dig his heels in harder. in this instance, it would probably serve neil even more to just call some temporary truce, even if every instinct in him is begging to keep arguing.
"fine," he says, a little shortly. "kevin is never going to be free of riko, and we're always going to let riko push us down because that's what we deserve. a spoiled brat with his chewtoys. that's what you want, huh?"
even though he's already mentally agreed to let the argument drop, neil can feel his temper rising all over again. it would be so nice to grab jean by the shoulders and shake him until he sees how stupid this entire situation is. but neil also isn't stupid ― he's fully aware that in some other universe, he'd be just as worn down physically and mentally as jean, because his mother never would have taken him and run. and with that mindset, he forces himself to exhale slowly, trying to take things in stride. this really ISN'T jean's fault at the end of the day.
"you're not really trying to keep us alive, you're trying to keep us as locked up as you are," neil says bluntly. "but sure, i'll take the fact that the moriyamas are dangerous, and i'll try to keep my cool on that front. i don't want riko messing with my team." again.
@pinchofdeceit asked: "pure vanilla cookie." tugs sleeve. "pure vanilla cookie." tugs sleeve. "pure vanilla cookie." tugs sleeve. eerie, unblinking stare directly at his staff. ( leaning extra close, too. hi. )
"hello to you too, bluebird!" pure vanilla turns his body to face shadow milk, since his staff is already giving him all the view he needs (it feels polite to aim his body in that direction as well). with a smile on his face, he reaches his free hand out to press his palm on shadow milk's cheek.
"are you feeling in better spirits today?" he asks, caressing shadow milk's cheek, before poking at her chin. "or do you just need some affection?" because that, he's all too happy to provide. whatever shadow milk needs, she'll get. as long as it's within his power to do so.
been really contemplating the echo devices in the bl series.
we don't really see what they look like until the third game, where we get a close up view, and are able to decorate it to our liking. what we do know is that they're basically handheld devices.
i know it's a gameplay device, like it gives you the hud, but how do they work in-game? honestly, i feel like the screen of said echo is how you interact with the world.
the vault hunters can pull it up and scan their surroundings to see what rarity weapons are. like they can use it to actually see the different colored glows to see if a weapon is one of a kind or mass produced (like white variety vs orange variety). they can track their maps, or hold up said device to scan a person's information. if everyone has an echo, they're all in some database somewhere. it seems like echo is the main (or only) way to communicate with each other.
we don't really see much in the way of cellphones. given the scope of the universe, phones might be heavily outdated technology, or technology has crashed, and the powers that be were forced to come up with some new way to track things/communicate with each other.
course you can't communicate with people on different planets, but that might not be too far off the mark, given how fast bord.erlands technology grows. it's basically a crapsack universe, everything is run down and decrepit in some form, no matter what planet you land on.
but basically, echo devices in game are basically cellphones that look like an oversized gameboy. what we see in the games as far as HUD and rarity colors and enemies and waypoints? they see canonically, just by looking at the screen of their device. and also they can talk to anyone on the same planet. cause everyone has an echo. bandits, the villains, the vault hunters, all their allies, everyone.