So recently been reading over your blog partly because I reblogged something your wrote about costs of adoption to who ever asked. You seem to be sensitive to both how you and other pap might feel but also to the feelings of adoptees. I hope that you are able to have a good and happy family. Even if adoption goes against my personal beliefs because I know what it's like to be adopted. I truly hope that you are able to have a very happy family and I wish you luck on your journey.
I hope we’re able to raise our daughter in a way that minimizes the trauma of adoption. I understand that she’s already, at just 2 months old, experienced more loss than I ever have in my more than 30 years on this Earth. I can’t make that go away and I can’t fix that. I can do my best to mitigate how painful things are from here on out, but I know I am not going to be able to fill that void for her.
Which is why it was so important to us to have an open adoption and a good relationship with her first mother. And we do (so far, we’re only three weeks into this thing.) I want her to always feel connected to where she came from and who she is, I want her to be able to get answers to whatever questions she has as quickly as possible. I don’t want her to have to wait until she’s 18 to unlock some magic portal to her own history.
I won’t know if how we’re going about this is the right way or not for a very long time. But in the meantime I’m open to learning more about how adoptees feel and how I can go about honoring those feelings and helping our daughter work through them when they come up.
Thanks for the message.
-Dani















