its been almost a year now, and as it gets closer I feel this overwhelming sense of dread.. im not sure what for. Maybe its cause I do everything in my power to not think about that day cause i completely shut down. Ive been doing so good...! Shays felt.. father away lately. not in a bad way, just like im accepting what happened. That Shay is gone and theres nothing I can do now to change that. I cant bring them back but I can continue to keep their memory alive, tell people about them and how amazing they were
all of the sudden on my way home a song came on that reminded me of them and it was just... too much. Like a dam overflowing. its awful its like im back at step 1. I know this too will pass but Its just so hard. I feel so small and weak