snapping my homies out of being corrupted by the curse by firmly gripping their shoulders and telling them to "get real"
that didn't work. okay. time for plan b *gets down on my knees and starts tying my hair back*
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styofa doing anything
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
Aqua Utopia|海の底で記憶を紡ぐ
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

oozey mess
hello vonnie

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❣ Chile in a Photography ❣

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@bowner
snapping my homies out of being corrupted by the curse by firmly gripping their shoulders and telling them to "get real"
that didn't work. okay. time for plan b *gets down on my knees and starts tying my hair back*
my favorite thing is to say "investing in" instead of "buying"
just closed on a big deal with a major grocery chain vis-a-vis the procurement of some fresh strawberries
isn't it so funny there's such a thing as "customer service voice"? Like I have to speak to you like a child or you'll rip my face off like a wild chimp
stop using google chrome. switch to mozilla firefox.
also put on these fox ears and this tail plug and start mewling
you don't have to do that
When I was little I had an irrational fear of when you tried to turn off your Windows XP and the screen would gradually turn Grey as you choose which power option to enter
That shit was SCARY!!!
Frankly, if I'm the odd one in a group I'd rather be mislabelled than singled out. "All right, ladies – oh, and Dave" like, don't put me on the spot like that. For the purpose of this exercise I will answer to "ladies".
*steps in a puddle and a Dark Souls style status effect bar rapidly fills until I’m struck with !!WET SOCKS!! nd i explode and die horribly*
I had to mentally send myself a reaction image the other day. I ran up the stairs on all fours, said to myself “i’m such a locationpilled scampercel” and then perfectly envisioned this image
please i've already hurt so much
*at the ADHD wizard meeting* sometimes i just find it difficult to hocus-focus
POV: you’re getting your teeth cleaned and your dental hygienist is acclaimed horror mangaka junji ito
I always forget that he has a dental PhD. Which he’s actually admitted provided a lot of fuel for his mouth based body horror.
being a dom is only cool if people like you. otherwise it's super embarrassing. if you're a sub you can be like "ahhh i wanna get fucked superrr hard >w<" and it's kind of endearing. if you're a dom and you say "i want to FUCK someone.. who will be mommys little KITTY today .." and no one actually wants to have sex with you, you may as well kill yourself. because there's no coming back from that
why so /srs?
The /j er
why so celibate
-the jerker
Why did this make me laugh
Because my friend you have a jovial soul