h-hyonk...

it's an nsfw side blog! • main: melodichordata • minors dni, thx

[desolendate]

im literally in tears what the fuck

[seymourworld]

beautiful mother soap dispenser just gave birth to a baby foam in my hand

[rrotgut]

sneezed so hard my cum flew out and i started crying

[rrotgut]

Gum.

[iamoutofideas]

looks thru a glory hole & sees a train coming straight towards me

[badassdemonsword]

this gif is like... almost biblical. as if hes experiencing a pharaohs curse...

[lucifers-golden-bitch-apparently]

wtf were you gonna say

[redhotarsenic]

Please respect my privacy

[lucifers-golden-bitch-apparently]

my deepest apologies

[redhotarsenic]

I forgive you

[redhotarsenic]

Anyway me when I suck that pharaoh good and hard through his scaramphigousus

[certified-cervid]

hit her gpt-spot by accident and she started saying we weren't just having sex, we were teaching a masterclass on pleasure

[innerchildabortionclinic]

corporate guy who walks in & asks who's the most fertile shareholder at the table today

[fuckboysecurityllc]

[sayorithot]

hm yes the mysterious handy tool for unusual home adventures with a twist my favorite device

[gyarutau]

Haha yeah man thats- youre gonna call who?

[animentality]

[throathole]

A cum bomb detonated in my fuck canal ✍🏻

[anakipanti]

[secretboldy]

Wait you’re a white guy named Brian who is into pup play omg it’s just like family guy

[that-twink-over-there]

[screenshotsofdespair]

[sjweminem]

Historical RPF is valid. My wife and I have had some of the best sex of our marriage as Will Shakespeare and Kit Marlowe

i just woke up

[sjweminem]

i just woke up

[xalatath]

I like when you click a link and it turns purple its like youre bruising it

[slugmania]

[thatforestprince]

I NEED TO SUCK HIS DICK CLEAN OFF !!!!

[thatforestprince]

thats the wrong image

[indigosfindings]

i really like this thing where websites will have separate "log in" & "sign up" buttons and if you click "log in" it takes you to a sign-up screen anyway so you have to click "i already have an account" and then it will ask if you want to sign in with your facebook account or with instagram or linkedin or deviantart or whatever, and if you choose "username & password" it asks if you want to put in your username or use your thumbprint, and once you put your username & password it emails you a confirmation code, and once you put in the code it says "do you want to give us your phone number for future sign-ins? do you want to sign up for facial recognition? do you want to give us your bones? give us your fucking bones?

[girlballs-archive]

websites prior to like the 2010s: sign in with your username and password

websites now:

[regexkind]

Waking up in the middle of a colonoscopy to discover that the gastroenterologist is industriously constructing a model ship inside of my large intestine