the end (!)
Tumblr told me that I created this blog one year ago today. Â I must have been reeeeeeaaaaallly excited about going abroad if I initiated all this nonsense a full two months before arriving in Denmark. (I was.)
Iâve been trying to formulate The Perfect Response to my time abroad basically ever since I returned. Â First, it was âI donât know what to say yet,â followed by âThereâs too much to say and I need time to organize my thoughts.â
And then: âI donât feel like it.â Â And so I never wrote anything. Â It kind of feels like that one episode of The West Wing. Â (Do you know that one? Â I canât think of how it goes.)
The following semi-coherent paragraphs were mostly written four months ago, edited reluctantly and at a snail's pace after that. Â It never seemed worthwhile to summarize my semester in Denmark if I couldnât create an absolutely pristine depiction of every single one of my thoughts. Â Something entirely worthy of my incredible experience abroad. This is far from that.
But Tumblr says weâre one year old today so it seems like the perfect time to post what Iâve got and hope that the symbolism of this arbitrary anniversary makes up for whatever might be lacking.
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 You would not believe the number of times that people asked me âHey, how was Europe?â in passing during my first three months back in Ohio. Guess.
It should be zero, right? Surely itâs zero.  Please be zero.
The answer is six. Six actual times. As in, people asked me that question while walking past me six times.  Six!  In those three months, six reasonable people expected an answer to that question in the 5 seconds that it takes to walk past a person.  Six.  Six times that happened!!
This type of situation is relatively exclusive to America. Â It baffles Danes completely. Â (Me too, Danes.) Â Itâs the same thing as that âHey, howâs it going? Good, how about you? Good.â thing that happens to all of us multiple times per day while we pass each other by â does this really make sense?
This really does not make sense. Hereâs a thing: If you want an answer, stop walking.  Show genuine interest in the human being with whom you are speaking. If you donât care so much, donât ask.
These people could have said âWelcome back,â or âItâs nice to see you,â or âStop prancing about and make yourself usefulâ. Â But they didnât. Â They asked me how Europe was in a way that showed complete disinterest in my response before even giving me the time to formulate it.
(SIX!!!!)
To be clear: I donât expect every minor acquaintance to care even a little bit about what Iâve been doing with my life since I last saw them.  But I do wish that those who didnât care wouldnât ask. I know I wouldnât â and I also know that thatâs perceived to be rude or anti-social by many Americans.
A Dane would be so confused if someone asked âHow are you?â without stopping for a genuine response. Â What is the point in asking? Â Stop doing that.
Anyway, this whole obnoxious tirade anecdote was meant to be a brief introduction to my response to the question, âHow was Europe?â Â Instead, it has very quickly deteriorated into a forum for my complaints about how much donât understand People. Â (Sorry? Iâm really charming.)
Letâs begin.
Letâs not begin. How in the heck does a person articulate their thoughts regarding a semester abroad?  Iâm pretty sure itâs impossible.  I could sit here and type up a whole frilly thing about how Iâm an entirely new person now and how my outlook on life has changed and maybe Iâd even throw in a few quotes from the Bible or Taylor Swift, but anyone who knows me knows that I don't do frilly.
Iâm usually not one to speak in hyperbole unless I donât actually mean it, e.g. âThat cookie was the Most Delicious Thing Iâve Ever Eaten.â
(Was it, Emma? Was it really? What Iâm trying to say is, âThat cookie was great.â Â I'm often like this if Iâm talking about food, dogs, TV shows, music, etc.)
But if Iâm talking about a real-life thing, a thing like Being In Europe, you wonât hear that kind of language from me. Â And perhaps thatâs how weâll know that I really genuinely loved it. Â If Iâm super understated and just mumble a bunch of unintelligible MALARKY, itâs probably because I have a lot to say and donât know where to start.
Do you see why asking me âHow was Europe?â while walking past me is so problematic? Â Even a normal person cannot answer that question so quickly; an abnormal one like me takes much longer.
Basically, since I still donât quite know what to say, Iâm going to talk about hygge. I like hygge so much I made a sweatshirt about it:
And also a blog.
Hygge is a Danish word (pronounced âhoo-gehâ) (kind of) that has no direct translation to English. Â Many Danes will tell you it means âcozy," but it means a lot more than that.
Here are two definitions that I really like:
For those of you who can only learn via references to Seinfeld, hereâs an interaction between George and Jerry that I think illustrates the opposite of hygge pretty well:
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George: Where are we gonna eat?
Jerry: We're gonna meet Elaine and Peterman at the Chinese place.
George: Peterman? Nobody mentioned anything about Peterman!
Jerry: Of course not; if I did, would you have gone?
George: No way!
Jerry: There you go.
George: I don't even know Peterman. How the hell am I gonna relax? I'm gonna have to be on all night! I don't like being on, Jerry. I would much rather be off!!
Jerry: Trust me, you're off.
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I understand Georgeâs frustration when he complains about having to be âonâ all night â that is not hyggeligt. To me, hygge (at least in part) means that nobody is actively trying to be or do anything in particular. On a personal level, and on a societal level.
Of course, any given moment can be âhyggeligtâ, like these ones:
But a broader definition involves the structuring of oneâs life in a way that is comfortable in every possible sense of the word. Â Especially comfort with oneself.
Hygge is a massive part of Danish culture and is probably what I liked the most (and what I have missed the most).  Americans could certainly benefit from stopping to consider hygge every so often. In Denmark, I saw hygge in the obvious places, like the constant abundance of candles and the long family dinners. But I also found hygge in other, perhaps less obvious, locations (in no particular order):
Value of free time / time with friends and family
"Tak for madâ
Desire for fresh air
Attitudes toward education, religion, politics, welfare, neighbors, and money/success
Danish patriotism
General calmness and quietness
Clothing stylesÂ
Biking
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Copenhagen very quickly felt like home while I was there, and I think the atmosphere of hygge really contributed to that. I like to think that my personality is quite Scandinavian, which Iâve decided to attribute to my Norwegian roots (thanks, Dad!). I really hope to go back one day (many times). Until then, wearing my hygge sweatshirt while drinking hyldeblomst, watching Borgen, and admiring my Danish flags will have to suffice.











