Looking for Love

[helainetieu]

How do you fall in love with yourself?

The same way you fall in love with someone else. Acknowledge the bad, embrace the good, and grow.

[visual-poetry]

by mark goede

[multidark]

[katsux]

[dendingo-deactivated20200629]

If someone could love me for me no matter what I too would make that face

[moonywendy-deactivated20250629]

I just love the allegory of the male gaze in crazy ex girl friend x) He just looks so ridiculous xD

[melaniemiller4-blog1]

So I am now hooked on Crazy Ex-Girlfriend and I have been watching it every since we watched it for class. I recently I watched an episode where a whole song is dedicated to the male gaze and it reminded me of our discussion in class. The song is called “Put Yourself First” and it is about how girls need to put themselves first. However, this song is satirical because all the examples in the song are how girls can put themselves first to make them more attractive to men. Here the show is critiquing how female empowerment in media is filmed under the perspective of the male gaze. This questions if female empowerment is really truly empowering for women if it is all meant to please the male eye. 

[brittanater-blog]

Put Yourself First is the best song (after Darryl’s bisexual song, of course). I’m so glad you brought this up! It’s so on point with the messaging that’s become so pervasive, e.g., do what makes you feel beautiful as long as men will like it too.

[havanasliu]

I was afraid I would always be in his shadow. Why did you say yes? Because he respects me and he loves me, and he is never boring. I didn’t think I’d find those things in another man.

Professor Marston and the Wonder Women dir. Angela Robinson

[havanasliu]

And Wonder Woman’s catchphrase is ‘Suffering Sappho!’. A famous poet from Ancinet Greece known for her love of women. It’s my belief that passion and emotion between women is completely normal.

Professor Marston and The Wonder Women (2017) dir. Angela Robinson

[huacheng-zhu]

“Do you think it’s possible to love two people at the same time?” Professor Marston & the Wonder Women, dir. Angela Robinson (2017)

[brittanater-blog]

I cannot overstate how much I enjoyed this movie and its portrayal of a largely healthy, balanced polyamorous relationship. While there were certainly some problematic elements of the film such as the use of the male gaze when viewing Olive and Elizabeth’s relationship, I felt that this film was a really heartwarming and largely realistic portrayal of three people in love. 

[freshmoviequotes]

Professor Marston and the Wonder Women (2017)

[hon394bellashilliday]

4/5

I went through and searched for an image or maybe someone else’s thoughts on the film we watched this week, but as I typed in “secretary” I found that nothing that came up would be class appropriate. I am not sure where this overly sexualized idea of a secretary came from, but as I searched the first thing that came up was a suggested blog for “office hotties”. I have to wonder if ideas of the over sexualized secretary came from this film, or if these ideas have been around for long before that. 

[brittanater-blog]

I had this same experience! I thought this was very representative of the culturally sexual associations with the role of a secretary. In the film Secretary, their relationship is much more erotically charged while they’re in the office setting than when their relationship transitions into the home sphere, and this may have a lot to do with the office fantasy that exists between boss and secretary. 

[immotion]

Secretary | 2002, Steven Shainberg

[saleenathestudent-blog]

Quite the opening with a confident Lee versus what we see throughout the first half of the movie

[brittanater-blog]

When I first saw this scene, I was slightly shocked because I had no frame of reference going into the movie. I initially was honestly super impressed and I thought she seemed like a badass female character because of the way she seemed to be doing this confidently and with mastery and enjoyment. However, echoing our discussion in class, this same sense of confidence really never seems to return to this character even when we’re back at this point in the narrative, which was disappointing to me when considering her overall character development. 

[immotion]

‘I said, pull up your skirt’ Secretary | 2002 | dir: Steven Shainberg | dop: Steven Fierberg

[saleenathestudent-blog]

This scene lacks any communication (to the point where it’s almost like assault) and is filled with much uncertainty and hesitation for Lee. 

[brittanater-blog]

This scene really bothered me as well at first, in addition to the very first scene of spanking. It’s clear from Lee’s facial expressions that she’s not 100% okay with what’s going on at first, or at least has some level of hesitation about what’s going on. I completely agree that there is a total lack of communication that makes these behaviors (which would likely be acceptable in a typical, communicative dom-sub relationship) problematic. Because Lee does ultimately show evidence of being pleased by experiencing both the spanking and Grey’s masturbating on her in this scene, it makes it a little bit more complicated in evaluating or moralizing these behaviors for me.

[onlinecounsellingcollege]

Not everyone who is single is lonely; not everyone who is taken is in love.

curiano.com (via onlinecounsellingcollege)

[cherridior]

Cinematic parallels Happy Together (1997) dir. Wong Kar Wai Moonlight (2016) dir. Barry Jenkins

[midori-kim]

Anything from the heart.

Happy Together(1997)

[brittanater-blog]

This was my favorite scene in the entirety of Happy Together. When all Fai can do is cry, I think that speaks volumes to what he’s been feeling and experiencing in his relationship with Po-Wing. I think the fact that Chang is the one to provide Fai with this outlet to “speak” from the heart symbolizes how Chang is the catalyst for the beginning of Fai’s journey of self-discovery and leaving his toxic relationship with Po-Wing.

[cinema-queerite-blog-blog]

Unveiled 2005

[brittanater-blog]

I very much enjoyed how this film developed and portrayed the relationship between Anne and Fariba, especially at this moment in the film. After her initial hesitation, Anne is open, non-judgmental, and even protective of Fariba after hearing about her situation and how she’s been posing as a man. I especially appreciated how the feelings she’d been developing for Fariba didn’t disappear after finding that she was actually a woman – I think this speaks to the depth of human connection, the fluidity of sexuality, and the fact that gender need not be decisive factor in our relationships.

[sixwordssayitall]

The one who breaks your heart cannot be the same one who pieces it back together.

@sixwordssayitall (via sixwordssayitall)

This quote immediately reminded me of our conversation about Happy Together and their continual and futile attempts to “start over”.

[extramadness]