running from fate

aesthetic. poetic. anime. harry potter. mtrench. CLICK THE CAT

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

i am here. and i am looking at her. and she is so beautiful.

perks of being a wallflower by stephen chbosky

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

I want to delete you from my life

erase all trace of you

maybe then I could breathe a little easier

maybe then the tears would stop

but how can I forget you

when you were my everything

when you've shaped my life

engraved your name into my heart

how can you say we were all for nothing

how can you forget the laughter

the warmth

the golden moments when we were invincible

how can you just stop

turn it off

just like that

when I can't stop missing you

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

my first everything I handed you the keys to every room of my home of my heart I invited you in and maybe things didn't turn out the way we thought but I never regretted it I've never kicked you out never intended to throw you on the streets you left on your own free will you broke into each and every room broke down all the doors set fire to the place I guess it was too dangerous for me to put that much trust into one person one singular person who had the ability to shatter me like this take my already broken pieces and rip apart what was left of me you used to hold me together but you're using that to your advantage the old paramedic now enjoying the sight of me bleeding I hope you're free I hope you're happy I hope you move on I hope you forget about me I'm sorry.

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

I'm dreaming of a whirlwind romance unable to sleep because of the endless possibilities of how I would be swept off my feet the quickening of my heartbeat the shortage of my breath every time I'm in the same room as the certain someone the hushed whispers of a new secret the flush of red tainting my rarely blushed cheeks the spark of each touch the fireworks of each kiss you, however, were never that you were my warmth security home familiarity safety net simplicity maybe in the mature state of mind I would choose you but my youth, my innocence, my curiosity my infatuation with cliche romantic dramas makes me drawn to something more a Taylor Swift song a love story #poetry #3amthoughts #love #crush #romance #aestheticpoetic #fireworks #canadaday #sorry #taylorswift

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

the best view is the one that feels like home your hand in mine your warmth, seeping into every part of me you keep my heart beating you are breathtaking heartbreaking ~~~~~~~~~~ I'm sure I'm not unique in saying that all I ever wanted was to be loved. truly, madly, deeply. #taipei #homesick #love #warmth #home #skyline #roofpics #taipei101 #poetry #aestheticpoetic (at Taipei101水舞廣場)

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

today, I wrote something I'm proud of

something that I didn't delete

something that was bittersweet,

not painful

maybe that's the first step in moving on

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

when asking for help

feels like I'm bothering someone

feels like an act of melodramatic cry for attention

when you brush me off

there's nothing anyone can do to help anymore

if you hand me a gun right now

I have no doubt in my mind I would shoot myself

there is a monster inside of me

it won't leave me alone

and it hurts

and I can't fight it anymore

I've tried

for so long

but I'm tired

can I let go?

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

friendly reminder that I'm hella not straight 🏳️‍🌈

happy twentygayteen as well as pride month

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

poison love

I miss you

that's so difficult to admit

even for me

honest, naiive me

because you,

ever so perfect you

broke me

shattered me

on purpose

you, scornful you

burned me with your words

ripped me apart

just so you could laugh

for all of a turn of a clock

you, charming smiles and warm hugs

manipulation and lies

who won my heart

but didn't care

is it still called love

when it's only ever hurt?

[somepiecesofmyheartandsoul-deac]

i never really understood the phrase "if you love someone you should let them go." i never really understood why you'd let somebody you love go. i never understood why until the stars didn't align and i was forced to let him go. now i have to hope he comes back.

Honestly, no one understands that phrase, until they too, are forced to let go.

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

if you truly love someone

and you cannot make them happy

you'd recognize that

they deserve to be happy

even when it's not with you

and maybe all they want to do

is go out there and discover themselves

maybe, in time,

they'll find their way back to you

[this-wastedlove]

“a piece of me still loves you, a part of me still holds onto us. unable to let go, unable to clear my mind of you. unable to peel off your name that’s engraved in my heart and the heaviness that follows with every letter that falls all the memories and all the laughter. All the love. Not wanting to cut the cord that connects me with you Not wanting to forget the way you used to look at me and the butterflies that made it hard to breathe but helped me learn to fly again. Not willing to let go of the map that leads to you cause our paths were meant to intersect I ran in the opposite direction but Everything leads back to you, and the way you kissed me that night. My first kiss, my first love. More than anything wanting you to be my last. But this time seems like the last, I need to let you go because you already did you are not there you are not here and I need to remind my heart that you are not mine anymore.”

— a stained heart | 02.15.14 | (this-wastedlove)

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

and reminding myself,

sometimes two people who love each other

who want to make it work more than anything

just weren't meant to be

no matter how hard you fight

the world will tear you apart

and I guess all you can do

is look each other in the eyes

and say,

"I love you.

so much.

and that's why,

I'll let you go.

goodbye."

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

you asked me what I'm good at I wanted so badly to lie sleeping or eating, I'd say but in reality, I fail at those too truth is, I'm not good at much of anything everything I'd love to be good at I can think of a million reasons why I'm not except for one thing I'm good at pretending smiling, through the cracks putting on masks I learned to plug my nose so I don't have to smell the smoke of the fire I started went and bought sunscreen and shades to block out the world burning because it's my fault I am an international disaster I destroy but I like to pretend everything is just fine and dandy. ~~~~~~~ the sun set tonight, and I wanted to see the stars. wanted to ask them, how long they've been up there. is it lonely? or do they spend their time looking down on us, gaining wisdom? I am in serious need of their advice right now. but alas, pollution makes the sky a murky starless blanket of ink. this is why we can't have nice things. #photography #sunset #insecurities #worldburn #sunburn #aestheticpoetic #pollution #stars #weaknesses #playpretend

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

try to sleep it all away drown pain in the emptiness of oblivion unconsciousness... I want to prove to you that I'm enough I want to prove to myself that I'm worth the battle I've struggled too hard for too long for this to amount to nothing but when will I know when will the world respond tell me that I've done it that I did well that I'm a good person how will I ever know if I'm a good person and if I'm not why am I here ~~~~~~~~~~~~ it's cherry blossom season. everyone I know is out there taking photos. campus has become a tourist attraction. what is it about these flowers that entrance us so much more than any other plant? #poetry...? #thoughts #sakurablossoms #cherryblossoms #deep? #idk #writersblock #help #aestheticpoetic #wellatleasttheaestheticpartisokay (at University of British Columbia)

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

don't forget

the laughs, the smiles, the secrets told

the memories, golden

don't forget

you've changed me, shaped me

you're a piece of my story

and I'm a piece of yours

don't forget

I exist, despite not being on your horizon anymore

don't forget

I'm still here

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

love what a crazy thing four little squiggles on paper can mean so much yet so little can cause pain, destruction but also joy and strength #just5amthoughts #theprocrastinationintenstifies #love #whatislove #insomnia #poetry #quotes #aestheticpoetic #pain

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

perhaps, in another life another dimension our story would have played out the what ifs, answered maybe we could have been something happy, possibly but alas in the here, and now strings are knotted the yarn of fate tangled let's settle in a compromise in between let's keep this uncomplicated #iamdrama #whatifs #thecouldveshouldvewouldve #maybe #anotherlife #storiesuntold #tangledfate #poetry #spilledink #aestheticpoetic #canadaplace #lights #water

[broken-shattered-beyondrepair]

you make me feel as if I'm diving

head first

into the depths of deep dark ocean

off a cliff

I'm petrified

but caution has been thrown out the window

you

are so warm

so gentle

sweet

caring

kind

and

so many things

I don't have the words for

you

make me feel like

I'm worth something

like I should be here

like I belong

like I have a place in this puzzle of life

you

make me want to fight

want to stand up

want to stay

you

give me the fire I needed

to face my demons

look them in the eye

and say "fuck you"

like I should have, so long ago

you

make me all kinds of crazy

I can't comprehend how I got here

how we got here

but I like the view

so I'll stay

if you'll let me

if you'll stay with me

hold me

please