My Uneventful Life

Reblog stuff I find cool or funny.

[daphnemoon]

[nevzatboyraz44-deactivated20241]

[humansofnewyork]

“When I was a kid I’d hide between the bedpost and the wall and read books about King Arthur. I wanted to be a knight. I wanted to be anything other than my father. We lived under his rule; it was horror. My mother was loving, and strong in many ways. But she wouldn’t leave him. I used to watch her wipe her own blood off the walls. When I was thirteen I ran away for good. I didn’t tell her a thing; I just disappeared. And I know she was hurt by that. I slept in the park with a whole crew of punks and addicts. People in the neighborhood would give me little jobs. They trusted me, and I never stole from them. Because I had honor. I’d rob a leather coat from Macy’s in a minute, but that’s Macy’s. I’d never take a woman’s pocketbook. I’d never break into a deli. No matter how far I fell, my honor never failed me. Music never failed me. And a good book never failed me. One day it was pouring down rain, and I ducked into a cubby hole. There was a copy of The Diary of Anne Frank; just laying there. I was stoned out of my face. And I knew nothing about this little girl. But it’s pouring down rain; there was nothing else to do. So I read the whole thing. She was beautiful. All this horror, but she was surviving. And that gave me strength. By the time I was twenty-five I had my own room, with a hot plate, and a pair of reeboks. I was playing music with some cool cats. I was proud. It’s like: I’m making it. When I finally got clean, the first thing I did was knock on my mother’s door. Hadn’t seen her for twenty years, but she gave me the biggest hug. She told me that every Sunday since I’d left, she’d lit a candle and prayed for my soul. That night she cooked some chicken, which I killed. Then she gave me what was left in some Tupperware. That was smart, because I had to bring back the Tupperware. And I never stopped coming back. I’m 66 now. I’m clean, I live comfortably, I’m financially OK. And I still go to see her every Sunday. She’s 94. She’s half-blind. She can’t hear. But I’ll bring her cake, and we’ll talk. She likes to take my hand, so she can feel my rings. And while we’re talking, I can tell: she’s in heaven. I was able to give her that. I gave her peace.”

[koraxmarinus]

the bird namers really knocked it out of the park with this one

[daphnemoon]

That magical time of year when the Great Wall of China and my apartment are the only two man-made structures visible from space. 

[ivecarvedawoodenheart]

[googoogooby]

Leaning to the right side these days

[tastefullyoffensive]

Sorry, I literally thought that's where her name came from?

[tastefullyoffensive]

Can't explain but he seems like he'd be antivax.

[rayed1000-deactivated20240731]

[tastefullyoffensive]

Fair point.

via

[fairycosmos]

the bravery of a girl who has to decide what is for dinner and then cook it and then wash dishes every day forever and ever.

[touching-living-breathing]

That's called being an adult

[fairycosmos]

no it’s called being the bravest girl on planet earth

[daphnemoon]

[humansofnewyork]

“Coming out of COVID I decided to own it. Instead of saying: ‘Nobody likes me,’ I flipped it around. I said: ‘There’s got to be a reason I haven’t met someone, and I’m going to figure it out.’ One of the first things I did was ask my fashionable friends: ‘How do I present to you?’ That’s when I learned my pants were baggy in the butt. That doesn’t seem like a huge deal. But first impressions matter. And if you present as the ‘baggy butt guy,’ that’s who you’re gonna be: the baggy butt guy. So I got some better-fitting pants. I never used to care about stuff like that. I thought: I’m a good person, that’s what matters most. And if someone hangs around long enough, they’ll figure that out. But nobody hung around long enough. And that sort of thinking made it easy to become a single guy in his late forties. So I owned it. I worked on making it easier for people to know me; so that it was more of a downstream experience. I practiced being chit chatty. I started saying hello to people more, looking them in the eye, asking: ‘How was your weekend?’ I went on a dozen or so first dates. I even kept an excel sheet; trying to figure out if there was a through line, when things didn’t work out: how long before I followed up, how many days between the first and second date, things like that. The excel sheet was a little much, I’ll admit. And it turned out to not be necessary. I ended up meeting my girlfriend at a catering gig we worked together. And she had no problem swimming upstream. I guess I made a good impression. Because later she told me that the moment she saw me, she was sneaking pictures to her sister, saying that she’d met her future boyfriend. Last Friday we had a legit conversation. We said: ‘OK, we’re no longer saying we’re dating. We’re in a relationship.’ I’m trying to teach myself guitar at the moment. Because I’d love to have kids one day, I’m working toward that. And when that happens, I’d love to have some hobbies we can do together.”

[humansofnewyork]

“She could be mean. But I don’t think it was malicious. A lot of it came down to insecurity. Anytime I was happy outside of our world, it made her uncomfortable. Both of us were actors. And if she ever needed to travel for work; we’d be fine. More than fine. I’d be happy for her. But whenever I got an out-of-town gig; it was always a problem. Some of my friendships made her uncomfortable: women, always. But also friends I’d known for a long time. Any time she detected an intimacy that she wasn’t a part of, she’d feel threatened. So I withdrew from a lot of my friendships. It just wasn’t worth the risk of setting her off. I became a caretaker. Everything flowed one way: keeping her away from negative thoughts, and negative places. I felt sympathy for her. I thought: ‘She can’t help her insecurities. Why should I punish her for them?’ So I committed myself to making it work. Everything made so much sense on paper. We moved into a nice apartment, and got a dog. I had a great relationship with her parents. It was hard to let go of all that. But mostly I just didn’t realize I could be truly happy if I did the brave thing. Right before the pandemic I got a gig in Germany. I spent most of my free time in the hotel room, waiting for her to wake up in New York, because if she ever called and I was doing something, she’d be super upset. On the last week she came to visit. One night she got drunk and jealous. And the next morning I caught her looking through my phone. After six years, after all the counseling, we were back at square one. Worse than square one, because the wedding was coming. It wasn’t the end. But it was the beginning of the end, because I finally started to confide in people. I remember one of my friends telling me: ‘You deserve to be happy.’ Such a simple idea, but I needed to hear it. Now I have a new fiancée. And it’s a completely different feeling. When I used to envision a future with my ex, everything was so vague. It was so detached from the present. It all had to be so different from the way things were. But with my current fiancé, it’s a straight line. Nobody has to change who they are. It’s just building on what’s already there.”

[ballwizard]

NVM im not evil anymore. i had a tasty treat & I'm OK now

[catchymemes]

[neenarchive]

the best thing a male character can do is be insane and love his wife