Hello!! I hope you enjoy! Just wanted to say thank you for all the support this fanfic has received so far :) I'm also sorry in advance :((((
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AO3
I've got an interview coming up for potentially a dream job offer so I'm prepping for that all the time at the moment - hence the slight delay in posting updates! But fingers crossed that all works out and it should be regular again!!
You’re seated opposite Gabriel and you note that he’s irritated at the commotion around you. No doubt he wanted to seat you in some private room to interrogate you but with the aftermath of the Ghost’s infiltration of the base - there isn’t anywhere to go.
You’re in an office that hasn’t been soundproofed, people are frantically ferrying their wounded colleagues or scrambling to gather information from each other.
Gabriel will be called away soon, he will have to answer to someone or orchestrate the next steps the Federation will take. He’d likely take the brunt of the blame for this mishap.
“Now, I’m only going to ask you nicely, once. You let them out, didn’t you?” He’s smoking, which you find unnerving. He’s doing everything he can to appear calm, but you’re sure he’s shaken by the breach and furious with your actions.
You don’t answer immediately, you’re not sure what the best approach here is. Despite everything, he’s still the only constant you have in your life.
“You didn’t tell me,” you’re oddly proud at how stable your voice is, you feel numb to everything other than the man opposite you, and you’re not even sure he’s an ally anymore.
He sighs, moving to stand. You can tell he’s wrestling with himself to maintain his composure. He looks out the window at the flurry of soldiers outside the office.
“I thought it’d be better this way, I’ll explain it all when this is over,” he sounds sincere, gesturing to the hallway to indicate that ‘this’ is the catastrophic impact of the ghosts.
“You killed my father,” you whisper, hating everything about this situation. You hate that your heart aches for a man you don’t know. You wished, more than anything, to remember the man whose voice you’d heard consoling you, who sounded like he loved you.
He turns back to you, “He wasn’t your father in the end, he was a liar - a traitor,” his voice is cold and hard and the look he gives you is lethal.
You’d also betrayed Rorke.
A soldier bursts into the room, “Sir,” his attempt to portray a calm indifference is admirable despite the heavy breathing that gives him away.
“I’ll be back soon, I expect you to be in your room until we can secure the site again,” Rorke says calmly before turning his back to you. He strides out of the room, following the younger man towards the main control centre.
It takes you a second to stand, hesitant to walk through the soldiers. Did they know who you were? Would they kill a relative of a Ghost? A Walker?
You hold your head up high and turn towards the living quarters, trying not to look at the extent of the damage that just a handful of men wrought onto a base full of highly trained operatives.
—
Time moves very slowly as you sit and wait in your room for Gabriel.
You’re sure that outside your room, the base is still in chaos but it’s completely silent in here. You’ve shut out every thought and memory that tries to resurface as you quietly try to piece together what you know.
Firstly, You’re a Walker. Your brothers are Hesh and Logan Walker.
From what you can recall, your childhood had been a happy one with the Walkers. This fact is less concrete, just moments of a normal, if somewhat eccentric family.
Secondly, you were tortured by them. The memories of your time in the room are hazy and interwoven with snippets of pain. But it was them - you’re not sure what drove them to do that to you. What had you done to turn them so far against you?
Rorke had told you that you’d been tortured to get to him. Who were you to Rorke? You had more ties to the Ghosts in Blood alone. You can’t recall being field-trained or dangerous enough to pose a substantial threat to them.
But Rorke insisted that they wanted to recapture you.
But you were out in the field, and you had tried to kill someone.
You had been raised by the leader of the Ghosts. Was it so unlikely to think you hadn’t also been taught some basic self-defence?
Your brothers were ghosts.
You-
“Keegan,” that was your voice, it was breathy and-
Oh God.
Oh God.
What the ever-loving fuck was happening. You knew next to nothing and Rorke had kept you in the dark. You had no idea who to trust.
Why didn’t he tell you?
Your memories would come back. They had to, you couldn’t stand this awful limbo of not knowing who you were and what had happened.
The door clicked open, and Rorke stepped into the room before locking it behind him. You felt small, entirely defenceless with him in this space.
“How you holding up, sweetheart?” his tone calm, reassuring as though nothing had happened. You furrowed your eyebrows. You’d allowed his enemies to escape and now he was calling you pet names?
“I’m alright,” your voice is small and your knees are now tucked up towards you.
He sits at the foot of your bed, looking towards you in the darkness, “Today was- it wasn’t what we expected,” he’s being honest, so you hope to keep him calm and keep him talking.
“No kidding,” you try smiling through the darkness at him. You’re, entirely preoccupied with self-preservation - it’s as though you’ve cornered a wild animal.
He smiles back towards you, “I suppose it’s high time you knew the truth.” You're taken aback, this was not the route you thought this military strategist would take. You had convinced yourself he would try something more calculated than the truth. But, that is assuming this was the truth.
You bring your arms up to hold yourself, “maybe," you’re being soft, giving him no reason to see any threat in you.
“You’re not a Walker,” he says it as though it’s obvious and it earns a physical, knee-jerk response from you,
“I am! I am a-” You’re furious, he’s going to lie to you again.
“Let me finish,” his tone is violent, final. He softens as you flinch from him, never once has he yelled at you like this. He’s volatile, you’ve always known that and yet-
“You were a Walker,” he adds, he sighs and meets your gaze again, and you don’t expect it. You’re silent so he’ll continue.
“You were a Walker, God knows what you were before the Walkers took you in.” He tries a smile at you, clears his throat and reaches towards his pockets, “You’ve been a Rorke for just under three years now,” his hand extends towards you, he’s holding a ring.
You’re blinking rapidly, you feel yourself pale as your stomach drops through the floor.
No.
“What?” you whisper, heart in your throat.
“It’s yours,” he says, and you take the ring gingerly, inspecting it as though it might trigger some long-buried memory of your time with Rorke, your husband.
No.
This isn’t right.
“I don’t- I don’t remember any of this?” your voice is level and calm, but internally you’re trying to stitch together even more fragments of your life.
He laughs, “It was rushed, and they hate me all the more for it.” He places a hand atop your knee and you don’t shrug him off.
“This doesn’t make sense, I wouldn’t have joined the Federation if I were a Walker, we’d have been enemies? How did we even-?” your train of thought is derailed by the constant theorisations forming and collapsing in your head.
“It’s a long story, kid, but, I was a Ghost once, before-” he pauses, clearing his throat, “I was close with Elias,” he replies, and God- it sounds honest. You don’t have any timeline to place this all on to verify anything he’s saying.
He looks at you, sighing as he continues, “I don’t expect you to wear it, they tried to destroy every part of me from your memory when they took you. I was foolish, I didn’t think they’d hurt you because they were.” He stands, and you track his movements. You feel stupid, even less certain. But he was so much older, how did you even meet - and yet-
You believe him.
“Gabriel, I-” You’re not even sure what you were going to say but you felt the need to continue. It makes sense, why the Ghosts would want you alive, why’d they want to hurt you.
But they’re home. They were home once.
“I’m sorry," he says, “I should have told you from the start, I didn’t want to overwhelm you.” He moves towards you and kisses the top of your head.
“Goodnight, sweetheart,” Is all he says before he leaves.
And you almost hate him for it, he has ripped away the idea that you had a family that loved you. Of course, you didn’t have a family, you only had Gabriel.
But he was so much older, how did you even meet - how?
The man who has been nothing but respectful and kind. Your husband.
It explains why the Ghosts want you. It explains why a highly capable, violent man remained calm with you despite freeing his sworn enemies. You hate how much it makes sense.
“He’s dangerous, and he knows exactly how to kill us,” It’s your father, a briefing before a mission.
Likely against Rorke. Your husband.
You don’t remember any of this.
The Ghosts had taken so much from you.
You had so many questions. Despite the answers Rorke had given you, you felt more in the dark than ever.
“You’re infuriating, you shouldn’t even be in that room, anything could-” You cut the man with the deep voice off by kissing him. He doesn’t hesitate - his hands reach for you. One hand on your waist pulls you towards him, the other holding the back of your head fingers in your hair as he devours you. He kisses you with such intensity your knees feel like they’re about to give out from beneath you. You whisper, “Shut up, Keegan,” against him as you lose yourselves in each other, he’s pushing you backwards until your back hits the wall. You gasp at the impact, and he raises one of your legs to his waist before he pushes his hips against yours, you moan into his mouth-
No. No.
How could a Ghost, Keegan, do those things to you in your memory and then so easily carve a knife into your skin?
You’re sobbing. Utterly frustrated at your inability to remember anything that could help you put your life back together.
I literally just sent something like two seconds ago butt I just thought of other things to say that are totally different from what I just asked so I'ma say em.
Butter's pretty good ( ˘ ³˘)🧈
I'm from California 'just felt like saying that'
Keegan P. Russ and Simon Riley are love and life.
I love your blog soooo much
Hope you happy and healthy 😊
Thank you for putting up with my bs
I like this one too →🧃
Hope job hunting is going okay sadly it's not for me *awwwww*
Ron Pope's A Drop in the Ocean is ma fav song
I'm kinda drunk rn *ya I drink. I know*. Love yaaaaaa soooooooo much
Hi Fav Anon 💅✨!! (again!)
The emoji is pretty cute - but apple juice takes it! 🧈
I'm from the UK !
love fictional scary men but I'd cry if they ever yelled at me irl lol
Thank you my love !!! 🥹🥹🥹
I'm doing alright! wishing the same for you too :) x
anytime my dude 🧃🧃
job hunting isn't for anyone, I live in misery and poverty :(((
I haven't heard that for ages!!! such a lovely but sad song :( I'm all over the shop with music - keep finding myself listening to Rain by Sleep Token atm!
Get them bevs (if you're 21+!!!)
I'm on three hours sleep for two days so I apologise if none of this is coherent or if it sounds odd!!! ahahaha
She's married to Gabriel?? All the brain washing for her is brainwashing me. I'm losing my idea on who the bad guys are. Did she get brain washed by both parties or just the federation? Real question btw. Wasn't Gabriel also brainwashed? I thought Keegan was her love? Is she not a walker because of the "marriage". I'm literally soooo confused.
Please help you very confused fav anon out. 😅
TABLE FLIP OUT OF CONFUSION
(ノಠ益ಠ)ノ彡┻━┻
🧃🧈🧃 ← da's fo you.
Butters pretty good 👍
I was so worried about putting this chapter out because I thought everyone would hate it but aha this question has made it all worth it. I live for angst.
All will be revealed soon!! - I just trying to figure out what direction to take it in (I wrote one scene of this story and then drafted a few chapters before posting this - the rest is a mysterryyyyy)
>:) (sorry and thank you for the continued sustenance 🧃🧈🧃)
Did Riley approve of Keegan dating Reader or did one of the Walkers train him to interrupt every single intimate moment
I laughed out loud at this - if you see this in a future chapter that's all credit to you, I love this idea.
Hesh weaponises Riley's constant need for Reader's cuddles and just sets him free to interrupt any moment between Keegan and Reader. Purposefully winding him up by repeating Reader's name and "find 'em". I feel like Hesh might go further and try to train Riley in advanced anti-Keegan warfare but is stopped by Elias.
Logan would just throw tennis balls at Keegan's head to activate feral Riley.
Was Reader adopted before or after Mama Walker's death? And what were Hesh and Logan's reaction to having a sister?
Oh, I love this question!
I always imagined that the reader was adopted before Mama Walker died and they were all really close :(((
So, I always imagined the Reader was adopted quite young so Hesh and Logan must have also been little - I reckon they didn't like her initially because she was new but the minute she was being teased at school they were throwing tiny fists.
I like to think they were super close growing up and included her in everything :((( protect the Walkers
Recently, I found a cool cheat sheet for emoticons and I'ma tell you now.
I. Can. Flip. A. Table.
(╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻
Dumb moment there. Anywho. So in love with the recent update. From how you described it, my sweet baby Keegan sounded heartbroken 😭. Keep up your amazing work.☺️
It's been so long since my last update it's now Pride Month!!! (Yay!!)
Again, I'm sorry it's taken so long - things are still up in the air for my personal life but here we go update time.
EDIT: I left in sections from a previous draft that kind of muddles up which Ghost the reader confronts. Very sorry!!! Edited out now!!!
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He’s standing 20 feet away from you, on the other side of the server room. He’s holding his rifle out in front of him - aiming directly at you.
He’s barely visible in the darkness, his figure illuminated only by the red glow that dips in and out. He appears entirely unphased as he inches closer to you, as though he is preparing to strike.
You can barely think straight, utterly terrified to face a Ghost again.
“Don’t cry yet, there’s so much-”
Your hand doesn’t shake as you aim your pistol towards him - your body resolute in its mission to fight. You would not be going anywhere with this bastard.
You’d kill him before he harmed you again.
The ghost calls out your name softly as though he’s trying not to scare you. It’s almost a whisper, but you can tell there’s no shock in his voice, he knew you were here. He sounds devastated.
“Kid?” his stance falters, his shoulders drop and he takes a step forward
Pain and darkness and laughter. Silver catches in the light as it moves closer to your skin.
You push the memory away, now is not the time for this. Even the slightest distraction will allow him an opportunity to kill you. This man was one of the finest the Americans had - you would not best his reaction time.
“Stay right there!” you yell across the space between you, voice unwavering and strong despite being up against an opponent whose skills you simply couldn’t match. He was a Ghost after all and you were?
“It’s me, I-” He says softly, “Do you know who I am?” he asks like he’s trying to tame a wild animal.
“Shut the fuck up” you snap at him. How dare he speak to you like that? Your fear was morphing into abject rage and your finger itched at the trigger. Yet, despite everything Rorke’s ever told you, the desire for answers currently outweighs your desire for revenge.
You decide you want to know who you’re about to kill.
You’re desperately trying to recall the images plastered around the base of the Ghosts, trying to piece together which mask matched the ghost in front of you.
He takes yet another footstep towards you and whispers your name again, his gun lowers away from you ever so slightly.
You readjust by centimetres and fire, shooting his left shoulder. A warning shot.
He stumbles backwards slightly, quickly catching his footing. He hisses in pain but that’s all the reaction he gives you from the impact. You’re almost disappointed.
He doesn’t deserve a warning. At least that’s what you tell yourself - you don’t want to think about how, just for a moment, you were scared you might have miscalculated. That your shot might have rang true, killing him.
Why would that scare you?
He takes a step backwards, somehow managing to keep ahold of his rifle amidst the chaos, which is now aimed back at you. Yet, it doesn't feel steadfast, more half-hearted than anything.
Your breathing is shallow and is absolutely giving away how much adrenaline is coursing through you. You notice your hand is shaking now, and you take a step backwards towards safety.
“I guess I should’ve seen that coming, huh?” he huffs, it feels like it should’ve been a laugh but his rigid roll of his shoulders gives away his discomfort.
“Why- How could-?” you shake your head, angry at your inability to control your emotions. You must sound so weak and vulnerable. You were back in the hole again.
“Look- Kid, this isn’t the reunion either of us wanted, believe me- but we’ve gotta move. Now.” his voice is low and urgent - he sounds utterly in control. “We’ve got to get you out of here, and we’ve got to go now” he brings his hand up to his comms device and you suddenly harden, clenching your jaw.
“Don’t you fucking dare” You grit your teeth and aim your gun at him again, you might be able to take one ghost out, but no more.
“Keegan, really? Are you fucking serious? She’s my-”
It’s the voice you once heard comforting you. It’s your father’s voice. Elias’s voice and its sudden invasion cripples you. You stagger back, trying not to lose your sudden advantage over the ghost whose gun is now only gripped by one hand.
“Dammit, we’ve gotta go now” There’s an urgency to his voice as his comms chatter too quietly for you to make out over the alarm.
He hurt you.
“I should kill you!” It was meant to sound threatening, but it’s more of a question.
“We don’t have time for this, lower the gun, Walker” I can hear the frustration mounting in his voice an-
“Walker?” you’re heart sinks. No. No. NO.
He pauses, “Oh kid, no- What’ve they done to you” he sounds sad.
“You’re an idiot” the man with the deep voice, he’s laughing. He has the same voice as the man in front-
“You’re a Walker —-- and thr–gh, a certified idiot - I thought may– it was just the men – —- family”, there’s more laughter.
You feel tears run down your face, “No” is about all you can manage. Your breathing is erratic and your stance is forgotten, the gun is lowered but he doesn’t take advantage of the situation.
“Higher! H–! Lo will c-tch me!” you’re a child. Happy.
“That’s your name, look I’m- we’ve gotta get you out of-” he begins, softly, urgently, but the doors to the server room crash open before he can continue.
“Keegan?” you whisper. It’s him - his gravelly voice. He’s the voice that’s… “No-”
He lurches forward reaching out for you, and every instinct in your body tells you to fight. Yet, the movement is all too familiar-
Your gun is raised and he stalls, before, yelling, “KID, C’MON” as he runs for cover. You’re standing out in the open as gunfire ricochets around you.
Every instinct tells you that this man is safe. But the memories of what the ghosts did to you are so overwhelming. So terrifyingly real that you can’t move. You desperately want to, but you just can’t. Your brain is too consumed with trying to piece together that you’re a Walker.
Your dad is Elias. Your brothers are Logan and Hesh Walker.
It’s only at the thought of them that you jolt back into action. Despite being willing participants in your torture, something doesn’t fit right.
No, they didn’t- it wasn’t. You love them, they love- loved you.
You’re surrounded by Federation soldiers, it’s too late for any escape with him now. But it’s not too late to help them. You’re not entirely sure why you feel the need to help them after everything. It’s too scrambled to make sense so you push it out of your mind.
“I’ve got you! You won’t fall!”
A tear escapes you.
Some of the soldiers grab you, and you try shrugging them off, “don't touch me,” is all you manage. They chatter amongst themselves, organising a search for the Ghosts. Some of the men begin escorting you back down the way they came. You have a mission in mind; get to one of the surveillance rooms.
—
The alarm is still blaring when you reach the surveillance room, it’s empty. You ask the guards to lock you in and stand watch so the ghosts can’t get to you. It’s not a convincing rouse, but they don’t question it too much.
Inside the room, you try to calmly make your way to the observation deck, it’s small but it’s got enough controls that you might be able to be of some use. There’s only one man inside the room with you and he's relatively easy to disarm, even easier to immobilise. You’re not entirely sure how you did it, it was almost a reflex.
Ignoring the shouting coming from his radio, your eyes scan across the series of monitors in front of you.
You find them quickly, they’re in one of the lower levels, two of them standing next to one of the doors that lead to an external tunnel that burrows into the nearest mountain. They’re trying to blow the door out with some sort of explosive, while two others are kickstarting a car to life.
You can see the button that will open the door, but you press another, the one that locks the hanger door behind them just before Federation soldiers can burst through.
You unlock the tunnel door, and open comms, “Go” is all you manage as the door springs open. One of the Ghosts shouts your name, and you hold back a sob. It’s Hesh. It’s your brother Hesh.
The ghost standing next to him has to forcibly wrestle him into the car before they make their escape. You press another button and the door seals shut behind him.
You destroy all the footage you can, but it won’t do anything. If they want to find it, they will.
You’ve sentenced yourself to death for men who tried to kill you. For men who are your family. Rorke had given you a false name, he had redacted your information from the dossiers on the Walkers.
He’d tried to erase you.
Nothing made sense, you’d seen the ghosts hurt you. You’d felt it and lived it for months and months and months. You’d never seen-
The door opens and Rorke stands on the threshold.
You’re crying, breathing rapidly as you point the gun towards him, “Gabriel? What’s happening to me?” you feel like you’re shutting down. He’s going to look after you.
He’s going to kill you.
He puts his hands up, “We’ve got you, it’s alright”.
You shake your head, “You lied to me. I’m-” he’s already crossed the distance between you and has lowered your gun. You’re shaking and you hate the conclusion that’s slowly forming in your head. The resolve that is building in you.
“We’ve got a lot to talk about,” it’s soft, thinly threat. He nods his head towards the control panels that you’ve deactivated, “don’t we?’.
You hate that another sob escapes you. How weak you are.
“You don’t have to pretend you’re alright, kid” it’s his voice again.
Rorke hauls you away, and you’re less concerned with your safety and find your thoughts drifting back to one, unmistakable fact.
Between Hesh and Logan, who would be more protective and or meddling when it comes to Sister!Walker going on dates with Keegan? Or when she's going outside in general?
Oooh I love questions about the Walker siblings!!!
I think Hesh would be more protective and Logan would be out causing chaos to stop their dates. Like, I fully imagine Hesh just glaring at Keegan whilst Logan (in full camo) is subtly trying to attach some sort of listening device to Keegan without being noticed.
Damn you new new to this whole world of cod. Which you're doing incredibly at. Sooooo much better than me at writing.
Your whole blog started in what April :0
Sorry bout your job :(
Oh man, I created this blog after being on here for YEARS without posting anything - I was too afraid of what might be lurking in my likes!!! ahahaha
My grammar is horrible and I've been so worried no one would like my writing - I bet your writing is also beaut and leagues ahead of mine !! it's messages like yours that keep me going!
Thank you! I appreicate it! Bad things come in three so hopefully I'm through it!! Update tonight? (I'm tipsy so the spelling might be off!!)
Im lowkey curious to know what exactly the Walkers said to Keegan when they found out about him dating Reader and what the other Ghosts thought about it
Hello!!
So interesting you mentioned this! I fleshed it out originally and then scraped it when I saw the length of the chapter 😭 I may post a mini chapter at the end of the fic that goes into it more!
But in my head the general jist is that the brothers were just unhinged when they found out. Elias is more tricky to pin down and figure out an exact response - it'll be fun to figure out :)
btw have some water💦🌊💧💧🌊💦💦💦💧🌊💦🌊🌊🌊💧🌊💧💧🌊💦🌊🌊💦💦💦💧🌊🌊🐠🌊💦🌊🌊💧💧🚰🚰
Ahahaha I'm sorry!! Im exactly the same about cliffhangers in other work 😭 and I'm sorry you've had to wait so long for an update, I have started on it!!
I appreciate and return the love!! Brb while I drink all the water xx
Hello how are you?? Just wanted to say that I really like your writing, keep up the good work! I look forward to the next part of your story.
Aww! Thank you - I really appreciate that! I've started writing again but recently lost my job so it's been tough! I'll be back posting regularly soon, promise! :)
Glad you're enjoying it so far, I don't want to mess it up!! :)
Here she is! Not 100% pleased with it so may come back and change bits but otherwise!
Previous. Next
AO3
Please see the tags for TW - MDNI! (COD Typical TW)
The base was a series of sprawling, networking tunnels built into the mountain range. The lack of natural light and the pristine cleanliness of the facility gave it an uneasy, clinical feel.
You were free to wander around when Gabriel was away from the base, although the areas you were ‘authorised’ to enter were mainly communal spaces. Once the people occupying these spaces learned of your affiliation to Rorke, they became withdrawn and quiet - ignoring you when you walked through the door.
You don’t visit those rooms very often.
You were only barred from entering areas that contained their more recent advancements; notably their engineering and weaponry projects. No part of you wanted to be privy to that level of information. You’d been captured before, God knows what information you’d already gifted the Ghosts and their US superiors.
It had been that sinking realisation that stopped you from pouring over the blueprints someone had left out on their workspace. You had gotten lost on your way to yet another meeting Gabriel had invited you to on your third day. The office hadn’t looked like it belonged to one of the Generals. It had been unlocked and there, right in front of you, were the locations and plans for the Federation’s most important asset: weapon-based satellites.
LOKI
It was this kind of information that the Ghosts were after, possibly information you’d already fed to them - you wouldn’t give them any more. You had squeezed your eyes shut and stumbled away from the office, trying to wash away any memory of those files.
The meeting you had been making your way to was already underway by the time you’d found it. You recall how Rorke had glared at you, shaking his head once you entered. He had been sitting at the front, arms crossed and facing the rest of the personnel. The General who led the meeting had explained their concerns regarding the US Army’s recent movements.
It was a concern that echoed around the base in the days that followed.
The Americans were growing increasingly bold and the Federation’s forces still weren’t large enough to launch effective counterattacks. Let alone another attack like the one attempted two years ago.
The attack you’d been captured in.
The Federation had been forced underground to regroup and rebuild. Most of the manpower and the weaponry they’d been creating had also been lost that day.
The Federation was still effectively in ruins. You weren’t sure what Rorke’s plan was regarding the Ghosts, the most he had revealed was that he’d proposed the completion of the facility you were in. You couldn’t shake the feeling that there shouldn’t even be a base this close to the border, or at least, not one that Rorke inhabits.
You’d tried to make yourself useful around the base, the Federation higher-ups weren’t happy at Gabriel’s suggestion to put you on intelligence. Surveillance was more suited to you at the moment, something low stakes, watching the perimeter or keeping an eye on the entrances whilst boxed away in a stuffy, impenetrable room. You had no access to anything other than the screens in front of you. Occasionally you’d buzz in a squad team that had been sent out to patrol the area.
Sometimes, it was Rorke you buzzed in and out of the facility.
There were two others in the room, overlooking the base. It turned out that being infiltrated by the Ghosts multiple times had become a sore spot for the Federation.
Besides, it motivated you to stay on top of the video feed. Your safety depended on the work you were doing. Gabriel had made it clear that the Ghosts intended to re-capture you.
In the meantime, your routine largely stayed the same. You still found yourself locked away in a room facing your psychologist every morning. Regrettably, you still hadn’t warmed up to his emotionless approach, the same approach he was using today.
He asks the same questions each day and it takes a great deal of energy each day not to leap over the table and throttle him.
He’d just asked about your school life and realised you’d about reached your limit for the day.
“What’s it to you?” you couldn’t hide your intense dislike of this man. He was cold, reserved and unfeeling. He scrutinised you and never really told you why he was asking these questions, what you could be doing to aid your healing.
Just the same comment about your short-term memory improving.
“Can I ask why you’re being so combative today?” he asks, voice unchanging despite the deviation from his normal questioning.
“Am I not allowed to be?” your arms are crossed and you can’t bring yourself to sit upright in your chair.
He jots something down, and you roll your eyes. Pretentious.
“What’s your mother’s name?” he continues with familiar questions, thank God. You decide to just grin and bear the next few minutes with this man.
“I don’t know” You’re looking at him now, you hope he can tell that you don’t like him. You’d been so polite, so hopeful that he’d help you.
“Do you have any brothers or sisters?”
“I think so, I mean-? I told you, I don’t know” You knew with absolute certainty that you had brothers. You had brothers who loved you.
You felt the intense need to keep this to yourself, maybe you’d tell Gabriel about your recent revelations. He was colder at the moment, intently focused on achieving whatever it was he set out to do whilst he was here.
“How do you know Rorke?”
“He’s my commanding officer. He’s helping me to get better, he’s-” you trail off, what was he doing? It felt a lot like he was playing chess with you, although you weren’t his opponent, you were one of his pawns.
But he held you so carefully, comforted you-
“He’s?” the man prompts, as though you weren’t aware that you’d trailed off.
“He’s leading the Federation efforts against the Ghost faction of the US army, I trust him”. Each time you admitted that you trusted him, something roiled within you. You knew it was because you were unsettled that he seemed to know more about you than you did. He also seemed to be using this information against you, rather than simply telling you what he knew.
“Who is Elias Walker?” his voice monotone, clearly finding satisfaction with your previous answer.
“Elias! ELIAS!” It was the boy’s voice, your brother. Your brother knew Elias Walker.
Your chest caves in on itself, and you quickly find it within yourself to steel yourself and shrug it off as a cough.
Your brother had known Elias? Maybe he had been hunting him down? You’d need to ask Gabriel these questions if you wanted answers but everything in you told you to keep these fragments of your life quiet.
“He was the leader of the Ghosts, Rorke killed him two years ago”. That was a fact. Every board that had information on the Ghosts could tell you that. Rorke had told you upon the anniversary of the Scarecrow’s death. A celebration he said, damning the man to Hell over and over again for his betrayal. Elias Walker had deserved a death less merciful than the one Rorke had granted him, he told you. You didn’t push him to elaborate on what that meant.
“Who are Logan and Hesh Walker?” you knew this one too, the boards surrounding the offices were littered with pictures of them, sightings.
“They’re Elias’s sons, they’re Ghosts. Alive. Dangerous”. That’s all you do know, except that you heard someone yell his voice once, promising to kill someone. Likely promising to kill you. They’d be some of the people who’d destroyed your mind.
“Thomas Merrick?”
A shove, playful “You got it!” a new voice.
“Another Ghost, alive. He took over as commanding officer .” you roll your eyes, trying to remain calm at the flurry of new memories.
“Keegan Russ?”
“Don’t move, keep your head down” the deep gravelly voice, again. This one was beginning to annoy you.
Instead of closing the session down, he continues, “Do you remember being captured?”
You pause, “No. I know when I was captured but I don’t remember the actual incident”. You’ve often tried to remember the moment, to know where you had gone wrong. Why you’d been close enough for them to get to you.
“Do you remember what they did to you?” He asks,
“Yes. Bits and pieces. I- they-”. You breathe, taking a moment to compose yourself, “I remember some of what they did. I wasn’t trained to withstand it, I don’t-” You clear your throat, “They hurt me”. It’s all you manage, weirdly proud of your ability to compose yourself in front of this idiot who you’re barely restraining yourself from outright strangling.
You hated that despite giving him the same answers each day, they still made you emotional and scared.
“Can you tell me about it” he is furiously jotting down notes.
“Do I have to,” is all you can manage, your head pounding.
“If you could try for me- if you remember any details of where you were, who was there with you. I have given you enough time to process this”. He is calm, entirely unaware that your hands itch to hurt him. As though you could, the man is a soldier, and you’re not trained.
Prick.
“It was always the same room, there were no lights, except from above, when someone would enter. It was men in masks, the ghost masks - I never saw their faces but it was the masks from the photos it was-” You calm your breathing once again, cursing at yourself. “They would drug me, hurt me- they used knives or their fists or- I was interrogated, They knew how to hurt me but I don’t remember… It’s all so far away, it’s like it was a bad dream or”. You laugh at your rambling, which worries you further, you must be near hysterics.
“Good, good”. He writes, a part of you desperate to read his notes another wanting to rip them apart, “Do you remember signing up for the Federation?” he continues, you’re confused by the sudden change in topic.
“No”. These were the questions that upset you the most, the ones that truly unravelled the extent of the damage. You had no beginning, no solid memories of anything before being woken up by Rorke.
“What do you remember before you were captured” he continues, glossing over the brief response.
His body was pressed against yours, your back against a wall. His hands were holding your waist, “fuck” he moaned next to your ear. His hand move-
“How many times!? Nothing! All I have are pieces of memories that don’t fit! I have no idea who I was, what I liked or how I lived!” You are going to end this session before you burst into tears.
“Okay, that’ll do it for today, see you tomorrow morning, I expect-” his voice was cut off as you slammed the door shut behind you.
------
It had been almost two weeks since you’d arrived, and you knew nothing more about Gabriel’s mission than that first day on the landing pad. He frequently left the base while you were confined to the facility and its unwelcoming occupants.
Gabriel had tried to make time for you, but it was clear his priorities lay elsewhere. He was hunting the Ghosts and you were nothing more than a distraction during the day. He’d visit your room each night to check in with you before you politely kicked him out.
You were enrolled on weekly self-defence classes and weapons training at the request of Gabriel. He’d find a way to remind you in almost every conversation that the Ghosts had made themselves clear in their intention to recapture you.
The thought of being back there was almost unbearable but you were growing increasingly restless inside the base.
You were in the lower recesses of the compound, your daily walk during your surveillance shift break. Down here, you could peek your head out of an observation window and observe the guards walking around outside. It was the only real escape you could afford.
Reaching your arm out, you could feel the gentle breeze through your fingers. You sighed as you forced yourself away from the window, moving towards one of the stairwells.
It happened all at once.
The peaceful silence is shattered by the deafening blare of alarms. You all but scream at the abrupt chaos. Your head snaps back and forth, desperately searching for a threat. Your heart is in your throat, choking you.
As the corridor plunges into darkness you fill your lungs with a shaky breath, the onslaught of memories is unbearable. You were back with them.
A laugh, “Oh sweetheart, you’re awake. Good. We’ve still got some things to discuss”, the glint of a knife. Screaming. Laughing.
No. You can do this.
Move forward.
The base was under attack and you weren’t where you were supposed to be.
You did everything you could to regulate your breathing and remain calm despite the thunderous sound of your heart. Your hands were shaking as you reached for the handrail, to begin dragging yourself up the final flights of stairs.
The emergency lights activate and now the darkness is ruptured by a deep red glow that dips on and off intermittently and plays tricks on your vision. It feels as though the shadows move, as though each time the lights come back on you’ll see a Ghost striding towards you. As though-
Not real. Move. Keep moving.
You feel a tear run down your face.
After running up three flights of stairs, you slip quietly through the doors to your level, praying that whatever caused the alarm was nothing more than a fluke or an exercise. You tried to keep your heavy breathing quiet despite the alarm still going off.
You were halfway through the maze of servers that led to the surveillance room when your foot knocked against something heavy and soft.
A body. It’s a body.
You swallow a sob at the realisation that the body was a soldier. Someone you’d passed in the corridors - now they were gone. Gone. Gone.
You're next if you don’t move. Move. Move.
You whisper an apology to the individual as you raid them for their weapons, closing their eyes as you turn to listen to the room. You try and drown out the loud thrum of the servers and the continuous drone of the alarm while you listen for movement. You inhale slowly, it’s now or never. You seize the opportunity of darkness and sprint across the open control space towards the bright glow of screens that lie just meters from the surveillance room.
You scan the screens, looking for any communication broadcasts that might indicate what has led to this situation.
Your head whips around as you hear a quiet thud behind you, your gun aimed out in front of you.
You’re staring down a barrel, but that’s not what makes you freeze.
Hi!!!!!!
I love Recognisance and just wanted to ask if Reader is the youngest of the Walker siblings?
*yeets drinking water and food to your house*
Hello!
Thank you so much! I'm glad you're enjoying it - actually motivates me to keep writing it aha!
I'm so conflicted about their age! At different points of writing, I've pictured them older than Hesh and then been like nah they're younger than Logan - I think I just want people to choose if it's a reader insert!
Personally, I see them around the same age as Hesh if not a bit younger? (the Walkers are so young!!!)
