Was I sexually abused in childhood by adults? Checklist. Bold the ones that happened to you, italicize if youâre unsure. This is an extremely triggering list, please proceed only if youâre ready to go through this.
Psychological and verbal sexual abuse perpetuated by adults
adults looking at you sexually (even if they donât vocalize it, you can usually sense that someone is looking at you with weird intentions)
adults vocalizing their sexual views of you, calling you sexual names, commenting on you in a sexual way, objectifying you and acting like you exist only for their pleasure
adults calling you sexual slurs
adults commenting on your private parts in any way that makes you uncomfortable (pretty much any kind of talk that is not about giving you objective information, or medical assistance)
adults implying in any way they wish to have sex with you (âonly if you were olderâ, calling you jailbait or anything in similar context)
adults blaming the shape of your body, or your appearance, for their sexual interest of you
adults claiming your body is âsinfulâ or âprovocativeâ or âasking for itâ and forcing you to cover it
adults saying any sexual thing they would like to do to you, or implying that any part of you exists for their pleasure
adults insulting your private parts and humiliating you
adults comparing you to pornography or other sexually provocative adults
adults exposing you to pornographic materials (even if you accidentally stumble on them, it was their responsibility to protect you from that)
adults forcing you to look at pornographic materials
adults sending you any kind of nude or sexual images or materials
adults telling you in detail about their experiences of sexual abuse and rape
adults humiliating you for development of your body and any changes youâre going thru
adults humiliating your bodily functions
adults watching you masturbate, or trying to expose you to others
an adult claiming that you enjoy sexual acts, or the idea of them, and humiliating you based on their claims
an adult claiming that you are filthy and perverted for âliking certain sexual actsâ
adults managing to engage in conversation with you online and turning it sexual
adults asking you to send them images or videos of yourself via internet or phone, and coercing you into sexual conversations and behaviour
adults influencing you into touching yourself or into any other sexual act (online or in person)
adults making you feel âusedâ or âdamagedâ after they touched you or imposed the idea that youâre only good while pure and untouched
Parental sexual abuse (though anything on this list can be perpetuated by parent)
parents denying your privacy and demanding you have to be exposed to them at all times (when changing clothes, bathing, etc)
parents exposing you to, and failing to protect you from sexual predators
parents failing to provide you with proper medical care and protection when you need it
parent blaming you for sexual abuse, and siding with your abuser
parents accusing you of sexual behaviour and attacking you for it
parents imposing the myth of virginity on you and insisting non-virgins are impure or dirty
parents exposing you to false information on sex (you should bleed, or that it should hurt)
parents failing to provide you positive touch, making you easily accept touch from strangers
Sexual grooming done to children so they wouldnât resist or even detect sexual abuse
adults introducing you to sexual experiences very early on so you wouldnât feel thereâs something un-normal or predatory about it as you grow up
adults grooming you into thinking that sexual advances from adults mean youâre special and mature, and itâs a good and normal thing
an adult bonding with you as if you were their age, trying to make you feel special and have you lower your guard around them, so youâd be more easy to sexually abuse later
adults inviting your flirtatious or sexual behaviour and approving of it, engaging in activities as if itâs okay if you started it or showed interest in them
adults taking your interest and affection towards them as an excuse that theyâre allowed to do anything they wish with you, and making it seem like you asked for it
adults neglecting to give you any sort of attention except sexual, coercing you to choose between presenting yourself in sexual way, or being completely ignored and neglected and written off as âworthlessâ
an adult trying to make you feel bad if you donât like the idea of sex, or donât seem to want to engage in sexual activities at all, or seem hesitant about it
an adult implying that eventually you will have to have sex, no matter if you wanted or not
an adult teaching you how you should react to sex, trying to get you to ignore your instincts and boundaries and just accept whatever is happening to you
an adult telling you that âeveryone does thisâ and making you feel like youâre behind on everyone if you refuse their sexual advances
an adult telling you about others theyâve sexually abused and trying to get you to normalize this type of behaviour and accept that it happens to everyone
an adult making decisions about your sexuality and telling you what you should enjoy sexually
an adult exposing you to grooming materials where group of people you can relate to are being used as sexual outlets or toys (used as sexual slaves or pets, dehumanized and reduced to toys)
an adult implying that you are or will be anyoneâs âpropertyâ or âsexual outletâ and trying to âprepare you for itâ
adults using their position of power (teachers, authority figures, coaches) to ease you into accepting their sexual advances
adults getting upset and making you feel bad if you donât like the idea of sex or arenât interested
adults praising you if you do accept their sexual advances and trying to ease you into accepting more
adults trying to get you addicted to pain and into craving sexual attention from them
adults calling their sexual abuse âloveâ and trying to frame it as âthem loving youâ
adults framing their sexual abuse as a âgameâ and youâre supposed to play along
adults doing anything to you that you didnât know is sexual and abusive, and would absolutely resist had you known that it was abuse, and that it would leave heavy psychological consequences on you
Physical sexual abuse perpetuated by adults
adults using sexual abuse (spanking, any kind of hitting or humiliation of your private areas) as a punishment for misbehaviour
an adult trapping you inside of a room or closed space and acting physically close with you, making you feel uncomfortable and endangered while you know it would be hard to escape
adults slapping, hitting, groping or fondling your private areas
adults exposing your underwear or touching it (snapping your bra, lifting your skirt, pulling on your underwear)
TW extremely triggering sexual abuse and rape
an adult kissing your mouth
an adult groping or fondling you
an adult undressing you and looking at you with sexual desire
an adult coercing you into undressing yourself in front of them and ogling your body
an adult taking a picture of you naked and using you to create child pornography
an adult sharing a sexual picture of you on the internet or any other media
an adult filming you or making any kind of sexual recording of you
an adult coercing you to get into sexual poses for them (even professionally, itâs still abuse)
an adult staring at your genitals or asking you to expose yourself to them
an adult exposing their genitals in front of you
an adult touching themselves in front of you
an adult having you touch them sexually
an adult having you tell them that you want to be touched in your private areas
an adult having you tell them to do sexual things to you (even if you say it by your own will, they are responsible for stopping you and letting you know itâs inappropriate, they have no right to sexually engage with you)
an adult sneaking into your bed and touching you sexually
an adults speaking to you as if youâre their sexual partner
an adult having you touch themselves in front of them
an adult having sexual intercourse with you (it doesnât matter if they do it gently or if you initiated it or if you didnât resist, itâs rape, children cannot consent to sex)
an adult engaging in oral, anal, or any kind of sex with you, or making you interact with any object sexually
an adult inflicting any kind of pain or injury on your genitals
an adult coercing you to have sexual relations with another adult or child
an adult harming you sexually
an adult praising you for enduring their sexual abuse and rape, trying to frame it as if youâve done a good thing by staying silent or not resisting
an adult having you say that you wanted it
an adult saying that you provoked them into sexually abusing you
an adult calling their sexual behaviour âa secretâ youâre not allowed to tell anyone
an adult threatening to hurt you, your family, or someone you love if you expose their sexual behaviour
an adult threatening to expose what theyâve done to you in order to humiliate you and cast shadow on your name
an adult blackmailing you with sexual materials theyâve made of you
 *itâs impossible for children to stop or resist sexual abuse, because if an adult is willing to rape a child, that adult is willing to kill a child as well, childâs instincts stop them from resisting in hope their life will be spared
*children are never responsible for sexual abuse being inflicted on them, not if they ask for it, not if they initiate it, adults are responsible for protecting children for abuse, and if they use anything as an excuse to gain pleasure from molesting a child, theyâre monsters
*if any of this is done to you by another child, it is still abuse, it still causes harm to you, and you still suffer consequences of it, your body is still being violated weather the perpetuators knows what theyâre doing or not
*all of these are abusive even when youâre an adult, after turning 18 youâre not magically protected from grooming or any kind of abuse, and a lot of people can still take advantage of you sexually and harm you, nobody should be grooming or objectifying you or touching you without your consent at any stage in your life
*if your body reacts with arousal and lubrication to sexual abuse, itâs not a sign of you enjoying or liking it, your body is doing it for self protection, it would harm you much worse to be raped or abused without lubrication, same with orgasms, not a sign of pleasure, but desperation for it to be over
if you can bold 3 or more of these, youâve been thru sexual abuse as a child.
jacobvanloon
areudirty
baratheonpilled
