I think you're the bee's pajamas

a journey that arrives you at your destination is not backwards // proud practitioner of the dying art of the floranhorn // this is a beige hate blog

[yesterdaysprint]

The Pittsburgh Press, Pennsylvania, February 28, 1915

[the1920sinpictures]

1927 c. Black satin afternoon frock has a black satin slip integral to the dress with scrolling floral embroidery on the tulle lace overlay. In reverse, the satin sleeves have tulle lace underlay with cuffed sleeves and popper fastenings. Across the front and back is a swags satin ribbon effect, tasseled fringe at hem and beaded sequin applique on the bottom left side. From 1st Dibs.

[yesterdaysprint]

Don Herold in the Brooklyn Eagle New York, September 19, 1921

[bumfuzzled-buttercup]

listen I know that Christmas music is literally the same 20 songs over and over but if you think that’s going to stop me from listening to 14794 different renditions of O Come All Ye Faithful on repeat then you’re wrong

[bumfuzzled-buttercup]

What up y'all, I got rid of the parental controls that protect my mental health for TODAY ONLY while I liveblog my thoughts about Charles Dickens' A Christmas Carol

Anyway I've only read two pages and all I'm getting out of it so far is that Chuck cannot overemphasize how completely dead Jacob Marley is, oh and Scrooge is a turd

[bumfuzzled-buttercup]

Oh ho ho, Scrooge has a big knocker if you know what I mean

it's for his door

[bumfuzzled-buttercup]

Jacob Marley really showed up and said "I'm never gonna see YOUR ugly mug again"

Oh and we're enjoying ✨the past✨ right now

[bumfuzzled-buttercup]

You've heard of ✨the past✨, now get ready for ✨the present✨

Also Scrooge did NOT enjoy watching himself get so curmudgeonly

[bumfuzzled-buttercup]

Alrighty I'm back, we had company. So I'm reading about Bob's dinner and all that and there's a lot of description of a bird I've never eaten before. I guess my goose is cooked or whatever

[bumfuzzled-buttercup]

If I found out that people made fun of me behind my back, I wouldn't be nearly as chill as Scrooge was, but I guess I haven't been visited by 3 consecutive spirits at this point all with the sole purpose of humbling my soul

[bumfuzzled-buttercup]

Wow, the man was so desperate he grabbed the scariest ghost of them all

[bumfuzzled-buttercup]

We spent six pages about how Jacob Marley Is As Dead As A Door Nail, No, Even Deader Than That, but we get one sentence about how Tiny Tim didn't die?? What the heck Charlie

[bumfuzzled-buttercup]

Two weeks until Christmas, and that means I’m presenting this:

Top 10 Worst Christmas Songs This Year

1. That stupid Christmas shoes song. “sir I wanna buy these shoes b/c my mom is ugly and dying”

2. Santa Baby. There’s no reason to sexualize someone who’s old and also married without their consent (but not the TSwift version b/c she doesn’t make it super sexual and weird) (for the record I don’t usually like TSwift so this is an unbiased opinion)

3. Grownup Christmas list or w/e it’s called. Like excuse u my grownup Xmas list consists of COOL SOCKS and BOOKS and RUBIK’S CUBES. I know world peace is unachievable in the current day

4. That one song that goes “dingle dongle” like 348722 times in a row for no reason

5. That one version of Winter Wonderland that unnecessarily repeats “winter winter wonder wonder land” an additional gajillion times at the end

6. Let It Snow. No, screw u snow. Ur cold and disgusting and wet and unnecessary for more than 0.36964 seconds at a time

7. Literally any version of I’m dreaming of a white Christmas. What r u, racist? Also see #6

8. That one version of Carol of the Bells where they changed the lyrics to be Super Christian™ (I say this as a devout Christian, and I do love Jesus, but this song is awful)

9. All versions of Frosty the Snowman. U expect me to believe that a snowman comes to life from a magical silk hat and stays clean and pure white even while running around the entire gosh diddly darn town? Miss me with that magic thump thumpity BS

10. That one version of Rudolph where the singer calls him red-beaked. Like do u even know anything about reindeer anatomy? Only birds have beaks u fool

Thank u this has been a psa

[bumfuzzled-buttercup]

An Update for 2021:

11. Mary Did You Know? (The answer may shock you)

12. 12 Days of Christmas. This one is fine one singular time a year, but more than that will cause a local partridge problem. Where can pears even grow, anyway? Shout out to the one radio station in my hometown that only played the last verse, you a real one

13. My Favorite Things. No, not the one sung by Dame Julie Andrews (I love her), someone else sings it and they go “schnitzelllll with nood|||||||||||||||les” and it’s not even a Christmas song wtf why do we play it during Christmastide???

14. Do You Hear What I Hear? This one is actually alright, I’m just mentioning it to make my husband happy when he inevitably sees this post. I guess he doesn’t know what I know

15. The Little Drummer Boy. The newborn Christ, as a human, did not smile at your crappy drum playing. You can make a case for God the Father smiling down at him for giving what he could but I draw the line at an actual infant smiling about it. Also why is this song sung by so many adult women????? Negative points for not being included in the biblical account

16. Specifically the Michael Buble version of Santa Baby. How to let your friends know that you’re Straight™ in one easy Christmas song or less!

17. There’s No Place Like Home for the Holidays. This one feels like it should be in a sarcastic holiday commercial and I’ve never seen it in a sarcastic holiday commercial, plus it gets stuck in my head just like the stupid dingle dongle song mentioned last time. I also won’t be able to go home for Christmas until at least next year, thanks global pandemic

18. The Cat Carol. I honestly felt like mentioning the Christmas shoes song again, but this one will suffice.

thanks for coming to my Ted talk

[bumfuzzled-buttercup]

Thanks to a crowd suggestion, I’d like to add one before next year:

19.

This version of Let it Snow (thanks @buckybarnesprotectionsquad13 I appreciate your sacrifice)

[witchyautumns]

[brigantias-isles]

Gwrych Castle, Wales

[life-spire]

[angelasscribbles]

[eos-sign-deactivated20250622]

Dust if you must, by Rose Milligan (September 1998)

Dust if you must, but wouldn't it be better

To paint a picture, or write a letter,

Bake a cake, or plant a seed;

Ponder the difference between want and need?

Dust if you must, but there's not much time,

With rivers to swim, and mountains to climb;

Music to hear, and books to read;

Friends to cherish, and life to lead.

Dust if you must, but the world's out there

With the sun in your eyes, and the wind in your hair;

A flutter of snow, a shower of rain,

This day will not come around again.

Dust if you must, but bear in mind,

Old age will come and it's not kind.

And when you go (and go you must)

You, yourself, will make more dust.

[kosmogrl]

[the1920sinpictures]

1927 c. Iron doors designed by Edgar Brandt. From The New Art Deco, Art and Culture, FB.

[dogpuppy]

[punksalmons]

the thing about writing is that it's very hard unless you have to leave the house in 15 minutes or perhaps go to bed

[themakeupbrush]

Valentin Yudashkin Fall 2023

[the1920sinpictures]

1925 c. Evening dress of chiffon beaded with gold dahlia blossoms, bead edged petals in gold and silver flat and crimped sequins, deep gold bugle bead hem fringe. From Augusta Auctions.

[erumelde]

[cannibalchicken]