A Silly Fucking Guy

I'm a silly little Nonbinary guy.

[bunnigobrrr]

Has literally anyone else ever caught a coworker in the act of something batshit?

My whole restaurant just heard my coworker blasting fucking porn cause he was in the bathroom, I guess couldnt hear it on his phone which was connected to a speaker just sitting on the counter.

I heard it very very faintly at first, and genuinely thought I was hallucinating cause I had been playing Date Everything all weekend and was operating on a good 3 hours of sleep.

Then.

Out of no where.

Everyone hears it.

Loud ass pure fucking porno moans. Not something me and my boss who is standing next to me can dismiss to the customers walking in the door and the few customers trying to enjoy their meal (a family of 3).

I walk over to the speaker and turn it off, trying and failing not to just double over and curl up on the floor, crying and sobbing with laughter. My boss is also laughing at how absolutely absurd the whole ordeal is.

The speaker turns off and I just can’t stop laughing. Embarrassed thoroughly and genuinely debating making a joke out of the whole thing.

I instead page my coworker over our headsets and say very quietly.

“The speaker was on.”

Probably the worst sentence that man could have EVER heard.

He comes out to the kitchen and is like “hey i have no idea what the hell was on my phone.”

DO NOT LIE TO ME MAN THING. YOU WERE GOONING. YOU WERE GOONING IN THE BATHROOM.

[cocoabats]

the dogs of war

the odgs of war

[carpboy3000]

Drew the life series girls in cute outfits! Etho is also there

[aphtoncorbin]

Day 27 watch out I’m coming!

[headspace-hotel]

Tell the stories you needed when you were younger.

Be the change you want to see in the world.

[mysharona1987]

[greyhina]

Same energy as that time in college I told a girl that “the tarot” says she needs to go call her mom and start going to therapy and she fucking did.

[tiruvenkadu]

absolutely a granny weatherwax moment. “you need to move the outhouse because its presence is bothering the forest spirits and they’re cursing you” because trying to explain about bacteria from the outhouse contaminating the well wasn’t working.

[alexaloraetheris]

Sometimes you gotta ask yourself ‘Do I want to be right or do I want results?’ and then act accordingly.

[landfallcalled]

Past Life Jimmy and Joel

[bunnigobrrr]

I need mother fuckers to cosplay past life members all in scene i need it for my soul please

[moringmark]

[bunnigobrrr]

Sometimes it’s so tempting to just go fucking apeshit. But I restrain myself because I’m in a fucking QuikTrip and cannot in fact, go apeshit.

[bunnigobrrr]

I know pride month just ended but that is no excuse to try and pull me out of the window when I’m trying to hand you your drink ma’am.

Anyways WHY THE FUCK DO PEOPLE DO THAT?!

[jebiwonkenobi]

Once upon a time I worked in this little burger/coffee/ice cream shop and a lady came in one winter and asked if we had a caramel apple drink and we were like ‘well we have cider’ and she was like ‘no I don’t remember what it’s called but this place made a drink that was chai tea, apple cider, and caramel’ and Breezy offered to try and make something for her but she changed her mind and left so Breezy and I were like ‘alright let’s try this’ because we had chai tea, instant cider mix, a shit ton of caramel, instant hot water from the espresso and too much free time. 

And let me tell you it was delightful. It tastes like watching the leaves changing color and dancing in the wind. It tastes like picking out pumpkins and gourds and fresh apples at the farm up north. It tastes like witches and freedom.

I make it every year now and this year I walked in the house on the morning of October first with all the ingredients and shouted ‘FALL DRINK’ and my roommates were like ‘????’ so I made them Fall Drink and now every time they get home from work they’re like ‘Fall Drink pls?????’

Anyway I remember literally nothing else about that woman but I’m very grateful to her. 

[lightrises]

for anyone wondering about proportions/etc here’s op’s answer from the repiles:

[ebonytails]

The Roaring Knight appears.

I actually made this a few days after Ch3-4 came out last June 11 but I got too busy turning it into a physical print to sell during A con last week! :3c People understandably were baffled by how fast I made a whole print to sell awsjshdjh

[dajo42]

i was a kid asking questions like "when you say to rate my pain on a scale of 1 to 10 do you mean relative to what i have experienced before or what i could theoretically experience in the future because what if i say 8 and then later i get twenty billion papercuts and i realise relative to that this pain is a 1" and they would reply "just focus on what you know, you literally had your foot ran over by a ford focus" and id say "well exactly but it could have been both feet which i know would surely be worse" and it still took years to diagnose me as autistic

[snazzy-hats-and-adhd]

"Is a 1 to 10 pain scale intuitive?" needs to be evaluated as an autism diagnosis question.

[gremnda]

i open up old vent comic sketches and i'm like aw hell yeah time to be angsty and sad >:)) then i remember i am so loved and the universe has always been kind to me and i care endlessly for my friends, then i close vent comic and go draw me hugging my friends instead

[a-daks]

I see this headline:

As a former cakewrecks lover, I figured sure, I’ll bite. Let’s see this cake. Literally nothing could have prepared me for this cake. 

They paid $49 for this “frog-themed” cake and honestly no amount of money in the world could be put on this masterpiece:

Keep reading

[ferretteeth]

I wish I could erase this post from my memory and experience seeing this image for the first time all over again

[fangirltothefullest]

As someone with adhd I DO forget what it looks like and so every time I am so unprepared XD

[rnismatch]

you dumb asshole, you just won $0,000

[tamagotchi]

😍fuck

[ad-wills]

[sorensouls]

He's a phantom