Somerhing

I really, really like magnus chase. No, the name is not a typo. Say it right. There is no "t".

[oz-me]

Thanks for the tumblr videos. You made me make an account on the hellsite. Are you proud?

yes

[burntoutwaxwings]

Btw guys, I can't comment on certain twitch streams because my real phone number that really belongs to me and is attached my phone, really, isn't enough proof that my twitch account is mine. Or that it's my phone number.

Fuck you Twitch support. I hope you're CEO gets Indicted by the FTC and pays billions of fines, ultimately resulting the the bankruptcy of twitch and Amazon selling the company to Google, who will promptly treat it like it's Google Hangouts and rename it YouTube Twitch, after which the company will have some vaguely successful years that don't meet standards, gave an account merging and the entire system will get so fucked that you can now live stream from you fucking GMail in box.

Fuck you, Amazon.

[burntoutwaxwings]

Nobody wants to give me their cassettes :(

Honestly my fault for not investing in the 80s anyway

Oh right. I wasn't born until the late 2000s. Fuuuuuuu

[burntoutwaxwings]

If teleporters got invented in my life time, I probably wouldn't use them. Not because they create an exact copy of you, but because I personally think that quantum entanglement is the inferior medium of travel. We could be using trains and *enjoy* the journey, not just get to the destination.

[burntoutwaxwings]

Peter Johnson: a Thunder Larceny and Peter Johnson: the Beastly Ocean are terrible movies.

And this isnt just me hating on them as a Percy Jackson fan, this is me hating on them as a film snob. These are AWFUL movies. They have terrible writing, the one *nice* foreshadow I found was Luke having his face covered in shade during the jailbreak of camp by Peter, Annabelle and G-Eazy. This one was cool, showing he was two faced. And the even cooler part was Peter believing that Luke was right. This was shown with Peter's face being shaded, just lighter and with less. Like he was on the path, which, as readers, we should know he was going to be if it weren't for Annabeth and Grover, who werent shaded.

Everything else? Awful. The music and CGI are the only exceptions.

[burntoutwaxwings]

Just so y'all know, there isn't a fancy word for "Negative Space"

Which is fucking stupid because there is a word for "Argue" thats ridiculously pretentious. "Expostulate"

TF even is that word? To postulate isn't to convene with conversational nature. I know that.

So I propose a new word: "Exposit" which is literally "Out of Place" from the Latin "Ex" and the Latin "Posit"

Because negative space is just something that isn't in the correct space, meaning it is literally out of place, exposit is the *perfect* word.

Too bad it doesn't exist. Don't worry about me, I just Exposited my glasses, I'm gonna go self immolate after auto defenestrating myself from the third floor of this brownstone.

Or something, I don't even know if this post will have tags

[burntoutwaxwings]

Oh no. It appears i took a wrong turn and ended up in a horror movie about the failures of suburbia

[burntoutwaxwings]

Waffles are superior k pancakes, but I'll take a good pancake over a good waffle most days because you didn't add chocolate chips to the waffle or the pancake and I'll be honest nobody can butter waffles right, therefore: pancakes are more consistent but also lesser.

[burntoutwaxwings]

*in Donny J Trump voice* "This is peak white girl music. Nothing tops this white girl music. Ya know, my friend, and he's a good friend, he says to me, Stu, what's the weakest white girl music, and I gotta say, the weakest white girl music, and it truly is peak, it's the peakest of peak, is Love Me Not by EMEI. Nothing beats it. Not even California Gurls. Not even Chappel Roan."

This is a bit. Chappel Roan is amazing.

[burntoutwaxwings]

As I think to myself

What a shitty driver...

What a shitty driver...

What a shitty driverrrrr....

This applies to literally everyone in the road, humble yourself

[burntoutwaxwings]

Ring ring

Ring ring

Hello, this is *doordash customer support*

You are late

Would you like to cancel ya order?

"no"

Order cancelled

"no"

Goodbye!!

I wish this happened to me right now. But via text

[burntoutwaxwings]

They did jt

"who did what"

My local bar and grill has created a restaurant burger that I actually don't think is exceptionally mid

[burntoutwaxwings]

Major Green Flag: when your partner doesn't settle for a bad parking job (I literally do this. That's why it's a green flag. Park good. It ain't hard.)

Other Major Green Flag: putting your shopping cart in the corral and grabbing other carts while doing it

Beige flag: cats (this is beige because cats can be beige)

[burntoutwaxwings]

Opinion, lukewarm take, even: sobriety isn't something that can be negotiated, even if the person in question has never had substance abuse problems.

"Hey do you wanna meet up on the third of the month at so and so club to part?"

"YEAH!! Of course, I love hanging out with you guys!!!"

*shoes up to club*

*it's a fucking orgy*

"WHAT THE FUCK GUYS, YOU KNOW IM ARO/ACE AND SEX AVERSE"

This is not an exaggeration of how stupid it is to assume that people who don't drink/get high will want to go to your party where they're pressured to be inebriated.

[burntoutwaxwings]

Legitimately hate when British people be like "oh my gosh its so hot!! You ameri-" I live in Texas. I am from the desert. I am not from the Texas desert. I am from a Rain Shadow High Plains Desert, known as Pueblo County, Colorado.

I do know how hot it is. I know more than you do.

In fact, I know all of the ways to get rid of the heat, including but not limited to: installing an awning, opening the windows. Fans. Two fans, one running air in, the other running air out.

These are all achievable without an AC unit. Do you know how to cool a Home without AC in the desert? You use fucking Fans. Sometimes you get a fan that sprays water all over the house.

Oh, it is 80°F, which is 27.somethingC. It is 74% humidity. You are at... *Checks notes* IM SORRY YOURE BITCHING ABOUT 45% HUMIDITY??? GET THE FUCK OUT OF HERE. At least you have a claim to 82°F. That's... Still not hotter than where I am. That's London, though.

[burntoutwaxwings]

My Top 5 horror movies

-The Co-

Oh, right, this is supposed to be about like... Stuff that gives us the ick

- men who actually think homelander is even a remotely good guy

- MAGA and Come And Take It flags (we get it, your Republican... FUCK OFF)

- Not Having Money (oh wait...)

- The Rich (i still want to be rich though. I'll just pay my taxes and shit. Make the world a better place fr fr)

- CALLING A FUCKING AVENUE OR STROAD A BOULEVARD A BOULEVARD HAS A MEDIAN YOU GODS DAMN NINCOMPOOP!!! YOU TOAD EYES FOR BRAINS CIVIL ENGINEER, ITS NOT A BOULEVARD WITHOUT A MEDIAN

[burntoutwaxwings]

Doordash

Dog

Panda express

Panda express + dog = messed up doordash

Guys, don't let your pet dogs outside. Even if it does never enter the streets, your neighbors want their doordash.