Welcome to The Grove

Enjoy your stay!

[butterflypeachgrove]

🌸 🔖 Information/Rules 🔖🌸

Welcome to the Grove, Little Butterflies. You may call me Butterfly or Peaches, if you wish! If you want a story or have a question, I'm afriad there are a few rules you need to know first!

WHAT I WILL WRITE:

Yandere Themes (NOTE: I do NOT support irl Yandere behavior)

Gore

X Reader

Non-Yandere Content

Lightly Spicy/Limey Themes (i.e making out, light groping)

Fluff/Angst

Song Fics

WHAT I WILL NOT WRITE:

Rape

Incest

Pedophilia

Hard Smut

[pillowspace]

It feels like this every time I write a fic

[meantfortheshore]

[moremetalthanyourmom]

Okay but after seeing this I started doing it too and it’s amazing how many men I’ve run into bc they expected me to move

[youcangofindatree-deactivated20]

Gotta try it

[clevermanka]

I work (and walk) on a college campus. I’ve lost count of how many men I’ve smacked shoulders with.

[emmagrant01]

Recently, I was standing outside my son’s classroom waiting to talk to his teacher. I stood on one side of the hallway, not even close to the center. At some point, a man came walking along. I was standing right in his path, but the hallway was empty, so I logically expected him to swerve around me. Instead he kept walking right toward me, got to me, and stopped, as if waiting for me to get out of his way. I didn’t; I just smiled politely at him. He finally walked around me, clearly annoyed that I hadn’t leapt out of his manly path.

Now I’m wishing I’d leapt aside, taken off my jacket and laid it on the floor before him, then bowed deeply and said, “My Liege!”

[mercurialkitty]

I also work at a college campus. I smack shoulders sometimes, but I find that if I stare straight ahead and follow the advice below, people get the heck out of the way.

[songbirde108]

Honestly this post changed how I carry myself when walking alone in public, or in a situation where I’m the one leading. People definitely move for the murder gaze.

[onethingconstant]

Confirmed. I once had to rush back inside a convention hall as the con was closing in order to a retrieve a sick friend’s medication, and I didn’t understand why people in the crowd were jumping out of my way (literally—one guy vaulted a table) until I realized I was dressed as the Winter Soldier and doing the Murder Walk because that’s just how I walk in those boots. I got the meds, got out, and made a mental note.

I repeated the experiment later, wearing the boots but otherwise my usual clothing and mimicking the expression I thought I’d had at that moment. People parted like I was Charlton Heston.

I now wear that style of boots whenever possible. I recently had a man do a double-take as I walked by and ask me, politely, where I had served because I “looked like a soldier.” I’m not current or former military. I was wearing a flowy purple peasant top and looked as un-soldierlike as possible.

Moral of the story: wear comfortable shoes, square your shoulders, and walk like you’ve been sent to murder Captain America.

[naeonnoir]

WALK LIKE YOU’VE BEEN SENT TO MURDER CAPTAIN AMERICA

[fenland-witch-deactivated202005]

I will always reblog this post, because it works!! Even when coming up to a large group of teenage lads, who are taking up the entire pathway and had not moved for adult males let alone anyone else, got the HELL out of the way for the murder walk!!!

[breelandwalker]

Always reblog for the Murder Walk.

[archer-wise-deactivated20190912]

Question, will the murder walk work for people under the height of 5′5″?

[actualmermaid]

The murder walk does work if you’re under 5'5"! Having resting bitchface and wearing a lot of black helps.

I’m a small 5'3" and have been called intimidating by multiple people. I’m actually a marshmallow, but my face and the way I walk and talk say “intimidating” somehow

[whoopsrobots]

Even just the solid posture and flat expression- something about the, ‘too busy for your shit, would gladly sell your kidneys’ aura keeps the drunk creeps on the train from trying to chat

[poor-unfortunate-sardine]

CHAPTER 01 ─── ⟢ the heroine isn't doing her job!

Your first day as Night Raven College's newest tutor turns out to be significantly less organized than you had imagined. Headmage Crowley spends most of the morning speaking in grand, flowery terms about the importance of education while somehow avoiding every practical question you ask him. Whenever you inquire about scheduling procedures, student records, or designated tutoring spaces, he simply laughs and assures you that a talented young lady like yourself will "figure things out splendidly." By the time the meeting ends, your carefully prepared notebook contains far more decorative signatures than actual instructions.

Fortunately, Professor Crewel proves considerably more helpful. He walks you through the staff offices, explains which classrooms are available after regular lessons, and reminds you that your own well-being is just as important as your students'. Even then, your ears remain pinned anxiously against your head as you scribble down every detail as quickly as possible, terrified that you might forget something important. The thought of making a mistake on your very first day sends your heart racing.

Professor Trein takes one look at your expression and quietly intervenes.

Without saying a word, he reaches into his briefcase and hands you a detailed campus map covered with neatly labeled buildings and pathways. The kindness nearly brings tears to your eyes. "Th-Thank you very much, Professor Trein!" you exclaim, clutching the paper as though it were a priceless artifact. He merely adjusts his jabot and remarks that knowing one's surroundings is essential for maintaining order before Lucius meows in complete agreement from his arms.

By lunchtime, you finally believe that perhaps everything will be manageable.

Then the System appears.

𝖣𝖠𝖨𝖫𝖸 𝖳𝖠𝖲𝖪 𝖠𝖼𝖼𝖾𝗉𝗍 𝖺 𝗍𝗎𝗍𝗈𝗋𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗋𝖾𝗊𝗎𝖾𝗌𝗍. 𝖱𝖾𝗐𝖺𝗋𝖽: +50 𝖳𝗁𝖺𝗎𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗄𝗌

The familiar blue window hovers directly in front of your face before fading away a few seconds later. Your stomach twists uneasily. Fifty Thaumarks isn't much, but if the System considers this your first objective as the replacement heroine, then refusing probably isn't an option. Taking a deep breath, you remind yourself that tutoring students is perfectly ordinary work. Nothing dramatic will happen.

At least, that's what you tell yourself.

Following Crewel's directions, you eventually find the bulletin board where students are meant to submit tutoring requests. The hallway itself is pleasantly quiet, with sunlight spilling through tall windows and illuminating the polished floors beneath your shoes. A gentle breeze drifts in from an open window somewhere nearby, carrying the scent of freshly cut grass from the courtyard outside.

Then you actually see the request sheet.

Your soul leaves your body.

The paper stapled to the board is practically full.

Dozens of names have already been written in neat rows, some accompanied by preferred subjects, others requesting specific dates and times. A few students have even added little notes in the margins asking for longer sessions or additional help before upcoming exams. You stare at the sheet in absolute horror, your pocket watch nearly slipping from your trembling fingers as you rapidly begin calculating how many hours exist in a single week.

No.

No, no, no.

This is impossible.

You haven't even started working yet.

"Th-There's no way..." you whisper, your rabbit ears flattening against your head. "My schedule... my beautiful, perfectly organized schedule..." The color-coded planner you spent all weekend preparing suddenly flashes through your mind, each carefully arranged block of free time disappearing one by one as more students inevitably continue signing up.

The System, of course, chooses that exact moment to cheerfully notify you of your success.

[𝖲𝖸𝖲𝖳𝖤𝖬 𝖭𝖮𝖳𝖨𝖢𝖤] 𝖣𝖺𝗂𝗅𝗒 𝖳𝖺𝗌𝗄 𝖢𝗈𝗆𝗉𝗅𝖾𝗍𝖾! 𝖱𝖾𝗐𝖺𝗋𝖽 𝖱𝖾𝖼𝖾𝗂𝗏𝖾𝖽: +50 𝖳𝗁𝖺𝗎𝗆𝖺𝗋𝗄𝗌 𝖭𝖾𝗐 𝗌𝗍𝗎𝖽𝖾𝗇𝗍𝗌 𝖺𝗋𝖾 𝗂𝗇𝗍𝖾𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗍𝖾𝖽 𝗂𝗇 𝗒𝗈𝗎𝗋 𝗌𝖾𝗋𝗏𝗂𝖼𝖾𝗌. 𝖯𝗅𝖾𝖺𝗌𝖾 𝖼𝗈𝗇𝗍𝗂𝗇𝗎𝖾 𝗉𝗋𝗈𝗀𝗋𝖾𝗌𝗌𝗂𝗇𝗀 𝗍𝗁𝖾 𝗌𝗍𝗈𝗋𝗒.

You have a horrible feeling that this is only the beginning.

ㅤㅤ⊹ ˖ Ი𐑼 SPECIAL CG UNLOCK !! ace & deuce — the world's biggest nerd

ㅤ

The hallway outside the library is considerably busier by late afternoon, with students making their way back toward their dormitories after classes have ended. Sunlight pours through the tall windows lining the corridor, casting long golden rectangles across the polished floors while distant conversations echo from somewhere near the main staircase. The newly-posted tutoring sheet has already become a topic of interest, though most students only glance at it in passing before continuing on their way.

"Man, today's Magic Analysis lecture was brutal," Ace groans, stuffing his hands into his pockets as he walks beside Deuce. "Professor Crewel seriously expects us to memorize all those theories? No way."

Deuce's expression immediately darkens at the mention of the class. He hugs his books closer against his chest, shoulders slumping as he lets out a defeated sigh. "I-I know..." he admits quietly. "And mathematics isn't getting any easier, either. I understand practical stuff just fine, but all the formulas and theoretical explanations keep getting mixed up in my head." The thought alone makes his stomach twist. His mother had been so incredibly proud when he received his acceptance letter to Night Raven College, practically crying with happiness as she told everyone in town that her son had turned over a new leaf. If she heard that he was already falling behind in his studies, she'd be heartbroken.

His eyes suddenly land on the paper stapled neatly to the bulletin board.

"Tutoring requests..." he murmurs.

Ace follows his gaze and immediately snorts. "No way. You're actually thinking about signing up?"

Deuce hesitates for only a moment before determination settles across his face. "I mean... yeah. If I need help, I should ask for it, right?" he says, stepping closer to examine the available subjects. "Mom always told me that working hard means admitting when you can't do something alone." His expression softens as he thinks about her proud smile. "I want to become an honors student. I can't just give up because theoretical classes are difficult."

Ace stares at him as though he'd grown a second head.

"...Wow," he says at last. "That's, like, the nerdiest thing I've ever heard in my life."

"What?!"

"Seriously, Deuce! Voluntarily asking for extra studying?" Ace throws his hands into the air dramatically. "Are you actively trying to bore yourself to death, or did Riddle's rules finally break your brain?!"

"I'M TRYING TO BE A GOOD STUDENT, UNLIKE YOU!" Deuce shouts back, his face turning pink as he grabs the pen attached to the board. Ignoring Ace's endless laughter, he carefully writes his name onto the request sheet beneath Magic Analysis and Mathematics before stepping back with a satisfied nod. "There. Done. No matter what, I'm going to improve my grades."

Ace merely shakes his head, still grinning.

"You're such a nerd, dude."

The two eventually continue toward Heartslabyul, their bickering voices growing fainter as they disappear down the corridor. For several moments, the hallway returns to silence, disturbed only by the distant rustling of leaves outside the open windows.

Then Ace comes back.

He stops in front of the bulletin board with his hands in his pockets, staring at Deuce's freshly written name with a thoughtful expression. The idiot had looked so serious about it, acting like signing up for extra studying was some grand declaration of self-improvement. Honestly, Ace didn't understand what the big deal was. It was just tutoring. A normal, ordinary tutoring session.

"...I mean, somebody's gotta see what all the fuss is about," he mutters to himself.

Besides, History of Magic was terrible.

Absolutely terrible.

Professor Trein expected everyone to memorize centuries of names, treaties, historical events, and magical developments that all sounded exactly the same after the first hour of studying. If Ace failed his next exam, the old man would probably stare at him with that disappointed look that somehow felt worse than getting yelled at. It wasn't that Ace needed help, obviously. He was just... conducting research. Gathering information. Seeing whether this mysterious new tutor was actually worth all the excitement, I mean it's not every day you hear Professor Crewel singing someone's praises like he sung yours.

With a small shrug, he grabs the pen attached to the board and quickly writes his name beneath Deuce's.

There.

Nothing weird about that.

If Deuce asked later, Ace would simply tell him that someone had to make sure the tutor was legitimate before letting his hopelessly earnest best friend waste his time. Really, he was doing Deuce a favor. A public service, even.

Completely satisfied with this perfectly reasonable explanation, Ace stuffs his hands back into his pockets and strolls down the hallway with a grin on his face.

He definitely wasn't worried about History of Magic.

...definitely.

MASTERLIST , PROLOGUE , CHAPTER 02

taglist : @moto-cho , @aurorab-0-realis , @regaliaofchaos , @siriusthesleepy , @sinclaironestrogen , @inojinieeee , @kogane-twst , @friesareyummy101 , @mxvoid26 , @yuki--hoshizora , @lotsoflovelumi , @dollyhrtzzs , @fromsaltandsea , @tragicfiend , @vanillaadots , @kitrine14 , @carrot-1 , @tobitobby , @cocooola , @irenic-seraphiine , @nico-ith , @misskittyyy , @carrotcakeitis , @almostoriginalartisan , @celloccino , @bambi-mel8888888 , @deadonce , @reviewingreviewer , @lizziescarlet06 , @m1lly69 , @engurishu , @abigaiili

please comment if you would like to be added to the taglist! ♡

[allimili]

harejam as that one falin and marcille figurine !!

Harebell cookie by @chibisproductions

[egophiliac]

a night on the town, terrible roommates edition

(the senior citizen discount joke was originally going to be about kids-eat-free instead, except then I realized that there was no way I could picture them running that scam except this:)

[chibisproductions]

Another silly artfight attack for my dear friend @butterflypeachgrove (Peaches)!

he’s such a silly goober I just had to draw him the moment he appeared!

[distwistedknee]

Sora reunites with his old friends.

[succubusboyfriend]

being a self-taught artist with no formal training is having done art seriously since you were a young teenager and only finding out that you’re supposed to do warm up sketches every time you’re about to work on serious art when you’re fuckin twenty-five

[succubusboyfriend]

someone: oh yeah, do this exercise during your warm ups! it’ll help

me: my what

[suave-eddboy]

[thepioden]

What’s up I have an actual college degree in art and I was never ONCE taught to do warm ups.

[sparksel]

when i was in undergrad, it was kind of mentioned in and offhand way that we should do warmups, but we were never shown what that meant. And, y’know, we were young so it didn’t matter so much. 

Being older now and having an art job it’s…kind of essential. 

So: a quick primer for those of you who are like ‘ok but how do i actually go about doing this warmup thing.’ 

1) you may be tempted to do ‘a warmup drawing’ which is just a drawing that will take longer than it needed to and probably be frustrating and kind of bad because you didn’t warm up first. It’s tempting but always a trick your brain is playing on you! Do not trust! 

2) warmups will vary based on what feels good to you/what task you’re about to do/what motor skills you want to practice. That being said, some good standbys:

a) circles. Just a whole page of circles on whatever drawing surface you’re going to be using, whether that’s your tablet or your sketchbook or a drawing pad on an easel. For these circles you should make sure that you’re drawing from your shoulder and not your wrist. In fact, you want to be drawing from your shoulder rather than your wrist most of the time! forever! your wrist is delicate please preserve it! 

In order to ensure that you’re drawing from your shoulder, when you’re holding your pencil or whatever drawing tool you’re using, the only part of your hand that should be touching the drawing surface is part of the last two fingers–some people prefer the finger tips, but I tend to favor the first knuckles. Either way, the fingers should really be ghosting over the surface, providing guidance rather than support. 

I usually start with big circles and then go to smaller circles and lines of ellipses, and then try to fit circles and ellipses inside other shapes i’ve already drawn as a precision exercise, but i don’t do that unless i’m feeling loose

b) spirals! i don’t always do spirals, but if i’m stiff and the circles just aren’t cutting it, spirals are a good fall back. I start from the center and work outward, going both clockwise and counterclockwise until i feel comfortable with the whole range of motion. Some people really care about getting perfect spirals but for me it’s all about making sure i’m comfortable with how i’m moving so who really even cares about how the spirals look. Not me! 

c) lines! straight lines! in parallel! i do a mix of vertical, horizontal, and diagonal. These are often more from the elbow than the shoulder, especially if I’m working on a smaller surface. For this exercise, I recommend holding the drawing tool perpendicular with the surface

d) connect the dots. This is a precision and accuracy exercise and takes two forms. The first is to draw two dots and then draw a straight line between them. The second is to draw three dots and draw the curve that connects them. This sounds a lot simpler than it is in practice. Take time to ghost over the line you plan to draw before actually committing to your line. (I don’t always remember where I picked up my warm up exercises, but I’m pretty sure I got this one from Scott Robertson. His how to draw and how to render books are very technical but also accessible and worth checking out)

e) cubes, spheres, cones, and cylinders. These help get your brain into a more volumetric space. I draw multiples of each, rotating the forms around, and I’ll often take the time to do some rough shading on at least a few of them

f) spidermans! This one is really good if you’re going to be storyboarding or working on dynamic poses. Just fill a page full of spidermans doing all sorts of acrobatics. 

g) beans. I don’t do beans too much anymore, but I know a lot of people like it so I’m mentioning it here. Fill an area with different size bean shapes without lifting your pencil off the paper. 

h) short medium and long line repetition. draw a short, medium, and long line on your page, and then draw directly on top of them 8 to 12 times, doing your best to exactly trace what you’ve already drawing. Repeat with a wavy line. I’m bad at this one, which means I probably need to do it more. 

And there are lots more options too! Hit up youtube to see what other people recommend, put together your own go-to list, mix it up when you’re getting bored, etc. 

This is a long list, I know, but I usually don’t take more than 10 to 15 minutes to warm up, and I can warm up one handed while I’m drinking coffee, so, multitasking hurrah. 

Sometimes I’ll advance to a precision warmup and find that I haven’t loosened up enough yet; it’s totally ok to go back to an earlier exercise! Also, all of this has the added benefit of kind of ritualistically getting you into the drawing mode so even if I’m not feeling it before I start, by the time I’ve gotten to the end I’m usually Ready For Drawin’. Brain hacks. 

so, yeah! that’s a lot of words, but! Warmups are important! Save your joints, take less advil, do better drawings! 

[concerningwolves]

[t-c-art-inspiration]

How on earth are you supposed to draw from a sholder? might as well tell me to draw from the foot. It makes no sense

[justpickupthatpen]

https://youtu.be/pMC0Cx3Uk84

https://youtu.be/NBE-RTFkXDk

:3

[stupidlittlesideblog]

Reblogging to save a wrist

[justpickupthatpen]

[briarbramble]

Hi I have a literal animation degree and I learned fucking ✨none✨ of this

[neilnevins-deactivated20240617]

Bugs Bunny could singlehandedly defeat Thanos by dressing up as a TSA agent and setting up a metal detector in the middle of the battlefield saying that all metal objects must be removed if you want to pass on through now stick around for my 2,000 word essay on just how effectively he would convince The Mad Titan to comply

[neilnevins-deactivated20240617]

“For shame, doc! Dontcha know we got other folks waiting?”

(Thanos looks behind him and sees dozens of Bugs Bunnies dressed as angry yelling travelers with huge bags of luggage. Thanos rubs his neck guiltily and begins sliding off the gauntlet)

[vampiricyoshi]

I felt compelled

[ndiecity-deactivated20241101]

Nobody expected you to draw T. Hanos himself in the Looney Tunes artstyle but you absolutely fucking delivered

[dizzyallaround]

what ever happened to personality!!! i want decorative towels that arent boring!!! i want NOVELTY!! i want people to come over to my house and look at my trinkets and immediately think this lady is a wacko and also her stuff is haunted

[majiatto]

"what is that." you pointed to the items currently laid out in front of you on the table.

"what is what?" deuce asked cautiously, glancing at ace who seemed just as clueless, shrugging at his friend.

"guys, i asked for pads with wings. why the hell did you two buy wingless pads and fried chicken?" you pinched the bridge of your nose, groaning in exasperation.

the two of them froze over, staring at you with wide eyes and lips pursed in guilt-ridden surprise.

"...because, uh. we thought you meant 'wings', as in 'chicken wings'?" deuce tried carefully, smiling awkwardly and twiddling his thumbs.

"no, only you thought that. i told you that's not what the prefect meant." ace smacked deuce on the back of his head, glaring at his friend.

"huh?! but you said that-" deuce was about to snap back at his friend when you burst out in laughter, a wonderful guffaw that echoed across the walls of the ramshackle dorm.

"what? what's so funny?" the two couldn't even begin to understand why you began laughing.

"oh my god, you two are a fucking treasure trove..." you wheezed out in between giggles, your stomach starting to hurt from laughter. it honestly made you forget about your cramps for a moment.

"listen, how were we supposed to know what you meant by 'pads with wings'? we're teenage boys, dammit. we don't know that stuff!" ace bristled, feeling the heat of embarrasment rising on his cheeks.

"oh, so now you admit that you didn't know what you were doing either!" deuce furrowed his brows, glaring at the redhead, but he seemed equally embarrased by the affair.

okay, you honestly can't even be mad at them anymore. they're just way too entertaining sometimes.

those who know, know

[mika-the-xd]

⋆. 𐙚 ˚𝓘magine a witch! Yuu from witch hat atelier that got transported to twisted wonderland

The students in NRC are surprised seeing you bust out magic seemingly out of thin air— even though they have told that you were magic-less, and I mean it is right in some way but do you think you cared for labels? Nonetheless you had to gaslight and make people think it wasn't you who busted out magic because it was either that or people bothering you and having to explain to them the magic system of your dimension.

I like to think that Grim was the first one to find out about this; When he saw you fixing the cracks and cleaning up the Ramshackle with your spells. He was really intrigued but tried to play it off, but when you bust out something cool with your spells best believe he's gonna gawk— especially if you show off your original spell to him. Also food for thought, you try to make things more bearable to him using your spells like: making his blanket warmer because he keeps complaining about how cold your room gets when you're sleeping, etc. He knows it's you because the drawn spells catch his eyes every time.

Ace and Duece would also find out accidentally. I would imagine you're just doing something mundane and practicing with spells with Grim on the sidelines gawking and you explaining what it does in the living room. Then they'd walk in with you drawing a spell when boom! The thing you drew lit up and let out fireworks. They'd be so amazed because what?? The magic-less prefect can do magic?? You ended up explaining your version of magic to them while demonstrating it. Ace definitely asked you to teach him how to draw spells to use for pranks. Did he succeed? No, but that doesn't mean he'll stop bothering you. Meanwhile Duece would just admire the magic and ask questions from time to time.

Imagine teaching the Aduece duo how to fly with sylph shoes. Duece would get slammed into multiple walls and floors while doing it and Ace would laugh at him because of it. However Ace isn't any better, Ace would flip mid air and would accidentally launch himself too high— you had to save him multiple times because his screaming was ear piercing. You, Grim and Duece never let him live that down.

On that topic of teaching people how to fly. Teaching Kalim how to fly using the sylph shoes you drew for him would be a chaotic experience for you. This man is sunshine reincarnated, he would be so enthusiastic about this that he will sustain injuries, and he will laugh it off. He'd be similar to Ace and would flip and blast too far to the ground, the only difference is that he's laughing and having a good time even though this is literally his first time and he would most likely crash if not for your perceptive ass saving him so many times. Jamil ended up cursing at you because now he has a flying Kalim to take care of. You ended up banning Kalim from the sylph shoes because of Jamil's constant grumbling. (sorry Kalim)

To make up for your mistake of teaching Kalim how to fly, you ended up drawing some practical spells for Jamil to make cooking and his daily life more bearable. He begrudgingly thanked you, so now whenever your spell gets smudged he would ask you to redraw it— you don't know how he knew that the spells were drawn but he doesn't push you for answers so... You just go with the flow.

I would imagine that your sylph shoes would often get smudged so you would redraw them atleast twice a month and test them dead at night while everyone is sleeping. Unfortunately, Malleus walked in on you testing out your sylph shoes and would stare at you with confusion but also amusement. When you came down he shot you a million questions and instead of having a twenty minute conversation, you two lost track of time and ended up going on and on about your magic system back home for five hours. It was worth it though because now you have a fae suggesting various spells for you to try— he's a fast learner so he'd make some forbidden spells accidentally and dropping it on you as a suggestion. Would you make it though? Yes, yes you do because you don't give a fuck about labels.

You and Ortho would fly together. It scares your friends sometimes because they'd try to find you on the ground then Grim remembered that you could fly using your shoes then they'd look up and see you and Ortho floating while drinking tea??? Now whenever you and Ortho are missing they'd look for you up and not down. You'd also scare them for fun and Ortho would join in too because why not? Ace and Duece will prank you two back and now you guys have prank wars in the sky.

Also food for thought, how chaotic would it be if you let Lilia use your magic? Like teaching him how to draw spells and explaining the magic system and all. I feel like you two would get involved in some type of disaster— yes both of you, whether you participated willingly or not will not count because you are automatically scolded with him because you taught him how to draw spells.

Another food for thought. Can you imagine how much disarray you would cause if you were a prankster?? Like blowing a student off the window because of something petty that they did to you seven weeks ago— do you know how funny it is when you would frame someone because they'd never suspect you cause of your lack of magic. Little do you know you're snickering in the background while running away.

𝗔/𝗻: "guys I swear I'm writing something similar to this just be patient" I say while being held on gun point by a suspicious ADHD-like figure

[himasgod]

PLEASE DO MORE OF MALLEUS JUDGING OUR TASTE IN MENNN

This time people he'd approve?

(or lilia muhuhaahh)

Malleus and Reader

Where he complains about the boys you like

APPROVED ONES EDITION!

FIRST PART HERE

SECOND PART HERE

How would Malleus complain when you told him about the boy you like?

With Deuce, Jack, Epel, Trey, Silver and Sebek.

“I think Deuce is actually really sweet. Kind of… boyfriend material, y’know?”

“Hmmm.”

Pause. A full ten seconds of silence. He’s not judging you. He’s assessing Deuce.

“Spade. The one who brought you tea when you were ill and then spilled it on himself, the floor, and Grim?”

“It’s the effort that counts!”

“...Indeed.”

He folds his arms behind his back and paces in a slow half-circle around you, thinking.

“He’s earnest. Loyal. Respects you. Fixed Lilia's tamagotchi's....”

“Exactly! And he’s really trying to improve himself, you know? He’s got this whole reformed-delinquent-turned-good-boy arc and—”

“He once punched a student because he ate his sandwich.”

“But he did eat it! He stole his sandwich and ate it!”

“And then he apologized to the student and bought him another one.”

Malleus’s lips twitch. Is he amused? Approving??

“...He reminds me of a young Silver. Clumsy. Noble. Likely to trip while confessing his feelings.”

He gives a nod.

“Very well. If you were to give your heart to Spade I would only ask one thing.”

“What’s that?”

“Please do not allow him to name your future children. I overheard him once say he’d name a son ‘Axel Deuce Jr.’ That… must not happen.”

Malleus Draconia approves!

“Honestly, I think Jack is kind of perfect. Strong, loyal, responsible—”

“Ah. Now that… is a name I respect.”

You blink. Malleus actually smiles.

“He has a strong will. He is not easily swayed by others. And he has never once insulted you even in jest. A rare trait in this school.”

“Yeah! He’s so grounded. And respectful. He doesn’t even flirt, he just—exists, and I’m like: yes.”

Malleus nods gravely.

“He reminds me of the wolves in the Briar Valley highlands. Stoic. Proud. Dedicated to their pack.”

He pauses, expression sobering.

“If he were to court you, he would do so with his whole soul. No games. No manipulation. Just earnest intent.”

“So… you’d be cool with that?”

“I would bless the union with thunder.”

“Wait—what?”

“He would take care of you. If he hurt you, I would end him. In the spirit of diplomacy, of course.”

“...Uh-huh.”

Malleus closes his eyes in approval.

“Jack Howl. Acceptable.”

Malleus Draconia approves!

“I think Epel’s actually kinda hot. He’s cute, but he’s also got that whole secret rage thing going on.”

Malleus, staring at you like you just said you’re into carnivorous pixies:

“...Felmier”

“Yeah! He’s, like, fierce but still shy! Rough edges! Anger issues! Country boy charm!”

“You’re describing a feral cat. You’re in love with a barn cat in a human body.”

“He’s just passionate! Like, he doesn’t want to be seen as soft—he wants to be strong!”

“And so he tried to punch a pumpkin in Halloween. He sprained his wrist. That is not strength. That is unprocessed rage and calcium deficiency.”

“He’s fighting for his identity!”

“He fought Hunt for the last piece of steak. With a butter knife.”

“Listen. He’s got spirit.”

Malleus leans back, his arms crossed, exhaling.

“He would love you fiercely. Violently, perhaps. But fiercely.”

“So you approve?”

“I fear for your furniture. And your safety. But I also acknowledge… he's a good boy, more or less.”

He squints at the horizon, as if seeing your future already.

“Just… don’t let him carve your initials into a tree with a switchblade. I suspect he’d try.”

Malleus Draconia approves...! more or less...

“What about Trey? I think he's charming”“…The one with the glasses.”

“He’s sweet! Responsible. The mom friend. Cooks really well. Totally husband material, right?”

“Ah yes. The one who made a pie so suspicious that even the ghosts refused to eat it.”

“That was one time! He apologized!”

“He smiled while doing it. The way humans smile before adding mysterious ingredients to tea.”

“He’s just composed! You’re overthinking it.”

“What is he hiding?… secrets...?”

“Malleus. He made me homemade matcha roll cake for my birthday.”

“And yet you fell asleep immediately after eating it.”

“It was a nap!!”

“He once said ‘I only bake with love’ and then threatened Trappola with a rolling pin for touching his flour stash. Is that love… or culinary tyranny?”

Malleus closes his eyes, hands folded.

“He would be a devoted partner. Warm. Reliable. But if he ever turns on you… no one would suspect it until it was too late.”

“You would disappear and your name would be carved into the crust of a farewell tart.”

“MALLEUS.”

“I did not say he was unworthy. I said he was concerningly efficient.”

Malleus Draconia approves...! ermh...

“So… I might have a thing for Silver.” Malleus: goes completely still

“Silver. My Silver.”

"Okay that phrasing was weird but—yeah.”

“The quiet, sleepy, sword-wielding child..?”

“Exactly! He’s calm, thoughtful, protects others, makes me feel safe—”

“He falls asleep in hallways.”

“Yeah, but cute!”

“He falls asleep mid-conversation.”

“He’s a knight, Malleus, let him nap.”

“He would never hurt you.”

“So you approve?”

“I also once watched him sleep through an earthquake. You must understand the risk you're accepting.”

“He's endearing!”

“You would have to carry him. Often.”

“That’s fine!”

“You would be dating a man who forgets to blink.”

“Again. Fine.”

“...He would cherish you deeply. But if you perish in battle because he took a nap at the wrong moment, do not haunt me.”

Malleus Draconia approves!

“Also… don’t be mad but I think Sebek is kind of—y’know.”

“No. You don’t mean that.”

“He’s passionate! Devoted! Loyal to a fault—”

"Sebek... my pure-hearted Sebek. He yells when the tea is too hot"

“Because he wants you to have the perfect temperature for you!”

“He corrects your posture. While smirking about the honor of my name.”

“He’s intense!”

“He once screamed for twenty straight minutes because Silver was three minutes late to sparring.”

“He’s just emotional!”

“He called a squirrel a ‘treacherous beast’ for stealing one of your snacks.”

“And?? I was gonna eat that snack!”

“He attempted to knight himself in my name with a broomstick.”

“...kind of hot.”

Malleus just stares at you.

“You truly find him attractive...”

“He’s strong! Passionate! And deep down, I think he’d be really soft in a relationship.”

Malleus folds his arms, lips pressed thin on a little smile.

“He would shout his love for you across a battlefield.”

“Romantic.”

“He would duel someone over your honor if they merely sneezed too close to you.”

“Chivalrous!”

“He would scream your name into the abyss every night until the abyss screamed back.”

“…We all want someone like that deep down.”

“If you truly believe your ears can endure such a bond, then… I give my blessing. But I refuse to attend your wedding unless earplugs are provided.”

Malleus Draconia approves!

LITTLE BONUS

THANKS TO @lulu--lala19 FOR THIS IMAGE CUZ SHE MADE IT HERSLEF

THIS SO COOOL

[chibird]

Daily chibird check-in! 💛 Here’s your chance to reflect on your current state and reach out for help if you need it. (⸝⸝ ’ ᵕ ’ ⸝⸝)

Chibird store | Positive pin club | Webtoon

[gatesofminrathous]

there will never be anything as funny as the mutual disbelief between long form and short form fic writers about each other's style.

short form writers look at people writing 100k+ fics as though this is some sort of talent given as part of a fae bargain, that the commitment required shows some sort of ungodly mental fortitude.

meanwhile long form writers look at people writing 1000 word one shots like god I would cut off my left nipple to be able to say anything concisely. i would love to play with multiple ideas. free me from the shackles of this child I have birthed. i love them but I now must take them to t-ball and doctor's appointments and they're going to destroy everything I own.

[ao3commentoftheday]

[egophiliac]

the squeakquel

(no worries, this is the last one) (...for now)