Based on a conversation I had over the weekend with someone who was feeling burnt out with their art.... My advice to them was not to JUST make art as a distraction/medication for the unpleasantness in their life
And my line of thinking is this: If you only do something as a distraction or way to cope after something terrible is going on, then you will associate that action with it.
Now, I’m not saying DON’T use art as a coping mechanism, certainly not; just… don’t ONLY do it as a coping mechanism.
A lot of great art does come from working through unpleasant, heavy emotions, but the more we buy into the starving, tortured artist stereotype, the more we are hurting our creative selves by distancing the benefit of creative activity from the feeling of happiness it brings us. The art is a byproduct of the emotional labor of recovering from that unpleasantness, it’s caused by the healing and the work of recovery - not by the pain itself. (though as will all rules there are exceptions to this)
I have a blanket that I fondly call ‘the stress blanket’ because I started crocheting it while in the throes of Tech Week for our club’s AVPM production. I needed something that I could do mindlessly, but at the same time was soothing. Then I added a different color to it when I stressing about finals and hell week, and then it was something to do while I stressed about finding a job, and then and then, and then…. I realized I hated this full sized blanket that I had made bc it was just bad memories. It’s still my go-to when I need something easy to distract myself with, but I’ve added quite a few patches of colors that are NOT associated with unpleasant screaming and stress induced heart murmurs.
I think the same with drawing, or singing, or sculpting; if you are doing something JUST as as a way to bring yourself back up when you’re at rock bottom, then despite the benefits of the process (Feeling better after you’ve done The Thing), you’re also associating it with the bad times.
And the same with having ‘nice things’ that are reserved for “When I really need it”. If you have a bath bomb or face mask reserved for a bad day when you really need it… how often do you look at it and go “eh, it’s been a bad day but not THAT bad”. Soon something that should be a happy and good thing is mired deep in this context of “I have to be miserable if I’m gonna DESERVE something as NICE as *insert basic self-kindness*”.
My friend has been creating very, very, very impressive work but it’s also all been hard, dark, heavy, unpleasant subject matter. I asked them when the last time they said to themselves “Oh wow, it’s a great day. I should take some time for myself to knit/draw/paint”; they said probably last year sometime, if then.
So for over a year they’ve ONLY created while miserable. They’ve ONLY tapped their talents in the context of stress and anger and grief. And while it’s helped, and it’s been a solid plan of action, and while she’s made some amazing paintings…. she does’t look back at them and smile. She’s only looking back at them and saying “oh yeah, I made that the week after my father died,”
I know that when my life feels out of control I turn to things I DO have control over (my larp character, my writing, my art, video games, my home decor) in a very tunnel vision/obsessed manner, but I’ve also noticed that it’s a very real thing that if I do not make time for these activities that I enjoy when I am ALREADY happy, I am forcing myself to only associate them with “I need to blow off some steam so I’m gonna unplug and play guild wars for 3 hours”. This did make my mood better, but I asked myself when was the last time i played that game for FUN, with my guild, with an appreciation for the gameplay and story and not just for the distraction from irl it gave me.
(that answer was an uncomfortable amount of time).
I know that scuba diving is something that will always make me feel better and hit ‘reset’ on my stress meter… when was the last time I made time to just go for a dive? Sure I’ve been diving in the tank or for a reason pretty often, and like, really truly I would be happy after diving in a mud puddle, but when was the last time I just said “fuck it, I’m grabbing a few tanks and heading to fort wetherill for the weekend who wants to come?”
I’ve been selling a shit ton of art (and frustratingly most of it is for gifts so I can’t even post it until after the people get it) and I’ve been thrilled with the things I’m creating but it’s all been WORK. It’s all been HAD TO. It’s all been “omg this is so cool and I’m excited to make it but AHHH DEADLINE”. I haven’t had time (or energy) to work on my witch and cat story, I haven’t worked on my personal stories… I need to make time for all of that. I need to make time for ‘pointless’ art, for art that has no deadline and no purpose except for making me happy and I need to make a concrete effort to do that when I’m in a good mood.
Making goals and participating in things like inktober or nanowrimo or Doodle-A-Day or what have you is a great way to get content out, to get a following, to flex creative muscles and train yourself with deadlines and creating content on a schedule, and it may be something genuinely just for your pleasure, but they all have the same air as homework or a job. They’re fun, useful, exciting to participate in, but they have a lot of emotional stress riding on them (what if I don’t gain any followers, what if I fail, what if I suck).
Art with no ulterior motive (instead, just with pleasant side effects)
