Boring... Probably. Lame... Definitely. @buttification - Tumblr Blog

My wife and I were were talking the other day and, I don’t remember what we were even talking about, but the idea came up that we would need an oreo for. I joked about getting one from my secret stash. This is where she made her mistake. She said “oh right, like you could have an Oreo stash without me knowing about it.”

I’m sorry?

That’s a challenge.

Oreos aquired.

I’m going to hide them in a super simple place at first

But be sure to follow this post while I chronicle all the ways and places I hide them and also how I plan on taunting her with cookies while she can’t find the package

She is out of the house for a moment so it’s time to enjoy a few cookies

And find a new hiding spot

Hehehe

They up there

Normally I’m a Oreos with milk kinda guy, but I’ll take coffee if coffee is available

Now to hide them right under her nose

She never looks under the TV for anything. Tonight when we are watching Halloween Wars I’ll have a big dopey grin on my face

Time to up the stakes. It was fun having em here and hiding them around her while she didn’t know what was happening. Bit now it’s time for her to be in on the game she is playing

Four cookies packed in her lunch. Game on

I’ve been cleaning house today and feeling like I’ve done a pretty good job. Time to reward myself with some delicious Oreos

Aaaaand put them where she would never find them in a million years

Got up early this morning and helped pack everyone’s lunch. Pulling a damn Oprah over here

You get some cookies! You get some cookies! Everyone gets cookies!

Then a devious idea struck me…

I put the remaining Oreos in a baggie to hide by themselves. Now to “hide” the package where it will probably be found…

And pin the actual stash to the inside of the closet wall

kittyinhighheels

If you two weren’t already married I’d beg you to marry her because you two are obviously perfect for each other and I love this post with all my heart

masterofthenightscape

This guy’s dopey grin at his success at hiding oreos is exactly what I’m here for

You like that eh? Well you are going to love today’s installment

Look at that. So sad. So few Oreos left

Guess I’ll just pin em right to the middle of the wall in the middle of the living room. She’ll never find em there

Oh, guess I should put this back up

Bwa ha ha ha! You guys! You guys don’t understand! I was planning on doing this and when I got home and looked at it I was like “aww, it’s too thin. They won’t fit.” I even TOLD my wife this and how I was disappointed that I wouldn’t be able to hide them back there.

But then I looked again. They dooooo

Thank you all so much for the love. I knew y'all would like this, but I had no idea you would like it THIS MUCH. People calling us “goals” and stuff… Man…. It’s kinda hard to take in ya know? Anyways: if this post gets Over 9000™ before I get off work today I will pick up Halloween Oreos on my way home and this will not stop

And, as promised, a dopey grin

Twasnt easy to get the stupid video to load. But I got it and I recommend giving it a watch here: http://keepcalmandcarrieunderwood.tumblr.com/post/179330357103

She is so happy that the Oreo Saga continues. Just look at how happy she is

Came home to find this

But she never looked inside the blue chair

Good stuff, but it’s time for some cookies

Gotta have some while I think about where these guys are going next

Hmmmmm

Got it.

keepingcalmisoverratedgoddamnit

Ohmygosh oh. my. gosh. You guys. Near disaster. Check this shiz out:

Wife and I were sewing Elly’s Halloween costume up

Yea, she is going to be a spider and it’s super cute and all but. But. Loooook

Holy actual shit the Oreos fell out from the table literally next to her.

The moment she got up I threw them into the closet

Also:shout out to whoever it was that lost a follower for this post

Sry bout that eh.

samael-has-arrived

This is glorious and I’m so damn happy this is still going.

My god I need to see where else they are hidden. You are a genius sir

c-bassmeow

Shakira’s La Tortura > ANYTHING the Beatles have ever been involved in.

c-bassmeow

Can paul McCartney do this?

Can John Lennon do this?

Ringo star could NEVER

day-glow

Yeah because they don’t need to use their bodies to sell their music. That’s how good they are.

c-bassmeow

Shakira has sung in five languages, plays multiple instruments, and she doesn’t “sell” her body you asshat she’s a dancer and a good one at that; she does body contortions, salsa, merengue, pole dancing, belly dancing (Egyptian style, fusion, and more), samba, tango, and modern dance and more. She also writes very profound lyrics in both Spanish and English and yes she also had sillier more pop friendly songs as well and she also produces. So don’t even insinuate anything else! Bye 👋 they aren’t even that good did you hear what Quincy Jones said about them? They’re talentless!!! Overrated British pop band that badly need dentists

creatureffeature

woman: moves her body in a music video

fuckboy: shes just :/ selling her :/ body :/ for attention :/ no talent :/

moiraxrose

#just a demon struggling to find her straw

littlebluebarista

Can we romanticize video games the way we do books?

Like you hear all these things about how you can curl up with a book on a rainy day and drink tea and smother yourself in blankets but anytime you hear things about video games it’s always about how you’re wasting your life away yelling into a headset as you play Call of Duty in a basement?

Imagine bundling yourself up on the couch, the sound of rain hitting the roof, and putting on Fable for a few hours. Or getting home after a long day of work. You make yourself a cup of cocoa, put on fuzzy pjs, and play Viva Piñata for hours not giving a second thought to the outside world. Semester just got out? Throw on some Fallout and just take a night to breathe and enjoy.

You aren’t wasting your life away, you’re enjoying it. Games can be just as much an escape as books, except you get to be part of the story.

30-minute-memes

corn flaek

it’s because reality is terrifying and our world’s dying, and our developmental years were spent in a constant state of using increasingly nonsensical humor to cope

codenamemaximus

It’s called the rise of neo-dadaism and the same thing happened during WWII

well that’s not concerning At All

counttwinkula

time out hold up sweetheart let’s get it together before you wanna spread art historical misinformation

@biggest-gaudiest-patronuses has a spot on summary of the dada ideology; these artists reacted to the horrors and atrocities of WWI by embracing nonsense in a world that no longer seemed to make sense

but the period we’re in right now is decidedly not neo-dada! you know why? because neo-dada already happened, and not during WWII but during the 60s and 70s, through artists like robert rauschenberg, yves klein, yoko ono, and nam june paik.

what was going on in the 60s and 70s that might involve “terrifying” reality and “increasingly nonsensical” coping methods? the cold war! now the cold war is in much more recent memory,

but if you wanna talk about nonsensical coping methods among millennials? i would say “lol xD so random” culture is probably the best starting point, which is definitely post-cold war (knowyourmeme is giving me 2004 as a good benchmark date).

2004 is only three years after 2001 so this resurgence of dada thinking could easily be seen as initially a reaction to 9/11, and we can then trace the antics of the bush administration, the shift of the overton window, the rise of internet culture, the 2016 election, and the current political moment as developmental factors behind this current dada moment.

so since neo-dada already happened and this is definitely its own thing with its own factors, and since a big part of our dada is the influence of the internet on modernity, i posit that we start calling this e-dada or #dada

tl;dr: neo-dada is already taken, it happened in the 60s/70s, we’re doing our own kind of dada now

idkwhatimdoingbutimgonnacontinue

e-dada

thewritehag

dada kink

Is it too late to delete my tumblr?

deepfriedfuckpotato-deactivated

it’s never too late

xxdemiigodxx-blog

This is deep, concerning and yet heavily ironic, because right after the profound historical post comes…dada kink. This is an effect of e-dada

lilyanthus

I have not laughed at anything as hard as I just laughed at cornn flaek

swaggynikki

YALL DIDNT HAVE TO GO THAT HARD I WOULD HAVE REBLOGED FOR CORNN FLAEK

psy-faerie

If someone tells you to stop ripping on them, even if you’re joking, fucking listen. That shit gets tiring doesn’t matter if it’s a fucking joke no one wants to hear negative shit all the time.

psy-faerie

Some of y’all think you can be rude asf all the time bc you’re “just joking” but you’re seriously wearing people down.

finndeservesbetter

If non black people want to damage the fuck out of their hair that’s fine, whatever, but don’t be calling the moldy ass shit you get as a result dreadlocks, dreads, or locs, because I promise you they aren’t.

Sincerely, someone who actually knows what the fuck they talking about.

Feel free to reblog if you aren’t black and against cultural appropriation

azcrowleyfell

Seriously. White “dreadlocks” are literally just unwashed, matted, damaged hair. Knock it off, fellow white people jfc.

And miss me with that “but the vikings/irish had dreadlocks!!!” shit, because it’s not fucking true. Vikings and Celts were clean as fuck and commonly had intricately braided hair. Not nasty-ass matted “dreadlocks”.

memehumor

Damn hackers

ghostslostinwhatever

They’re all of pigeons

When I get my shit together I'm going to write all of the articles and books and do all of the vlogs that I wish for right now, the ones for people like me, people who are starting from a point in life that is different to where all of the current information assumes you're jumping off from.

I want to give people hope that you don't need to be middle-class and neurotypical and abled to live your best life. I want to help people the way that no one is helping me, I don't want people to feel hurt and angry that they are left out of every motivational talk or self-help article or book. I want to try to help at least one person so that when I get out of this I can be of use.

Ready to trick-or-treat

Update:

It’s Halloween again, and this year he’s going as Zubat!