[lleeta-deactivated20171217]

              MURDER  ME   !      murder  me  like  you  murdered  my  mother   !  

                                      go   on ,  murder  me  -    MURDER  ME   !  

                             - - -       I’M  ASKING  YOU  TO  MURDER  ME !

Highly  selective   /   private  - -    as  adored  by  rocco  since  2013 

[byeleeta]

I've had lo since 2013. we've been through a total of six blogs together and while there was controversy not once was I treated the way doleeta has treated me. She acts as if I have no right to roleplay Dolores because I'm a csa survivor and use interactions to cope. She truly believes that Dolores is "hers" and that anyone who dares make or interact with a blog for other characters in lolita is automatically a pedophile or a pedophile enabeler.

I'm abandoning this blog- I may or may not remake in the near future but I will be back. Dolores has been with me since the beginning and I'm not giving up on her now. You can find me on kik at incharacters just tell me your url.

I want to leave you all with something, though, before I disappear.

there's nothing wrong with using muses to cope regardless of the muses involved. There's nothing wrong with identifying with a character and taking the opportunity to change her story with her abuser- to change her assault to a situation where she fought back and won when you couldn't- as a way to cope with your trauma.

there is nothing wrong with roleplaying a fictional character regardless of origin and crimes as a way to take your anger out on your abuser and/or project your past onto them and then change it. There is nothing wrong with playing a monster to see him suffer.

[byeleeta]

THE DOLORES DYNAMIC  ( 2 / ? ) - Charlotte and Lo

Elements of the Dolores Dynamic are taken from the content of Nabokov’s novel &. both film adaptations. It’s a mix of canon material, headcanon material, and context-based inferences. Do not take any elements from the Dolores Dynamic

Charlotte and Dolores have a very strained relationship to say the least &. although the idea of smacking your child around &. insulting them wasn’t considered abuse in their time- their dynamic is certainly borderline abusive. 

Charlotte did love her husband &. was more than happy to marry him, but she never wanted Dolores. Dolores quite literally means “sorrows” &. Charlotte’s choice to name her daughter as such was a way of expressing her discontent over the idea of having and raising a child when she wanted to be a dancer &. travel the world. She most likely would have given Dolores up for adoption had it not been for her husband’s enthusiasm towards having a child.

Charlotte never quite knew how to raise Dolores in a “motherly” manner so to speak and when she misbehaved in the early years, she resorted to spanking. It worked until Dolores was eight- and then it no longer seemed to serve as an effective punishment. She tried taking things away such as dolls or outings, but Dolores always seemed to shrug her punishments off and find something else to do. Dolores quickly gained control of the household after Charlotte’s attempts at punishment continued to fail, and despite attempts to reign her in (such as the rules in the kitchen for dinner or attempts at guilt tripping “that’s fine but it’s your conscience!”) she remained in charge. Charlotte could never get Dolores to do something she didn’t want to do. (I believe that Dolores did want to go to camp, she was just resistig to maintain her position of power over the Haze household)

The only threat Charlotte saw Dolores as was a threat to attention- which she loved. Her daughter always seemed to steal the spotlight away from her whether they were at a party or with Humbert, etc. While behind the scenes Charlotte didn’t constantly insult, demean, or make fun of Dolores- she made sure to in the presence of company in an attempt to make it appear like she was still in control. She would occasionally lose her temper and call Dolores a mistake or unwanted (which did make Dolores cry and run off on most occasions) but she always apologized afterwards. 

While Charlotte did seem to care more about herself than her daughter I think it’s important to remember that despite her constant complaints about Dolores, Charlotte immediately made a move to protect her when she found Humbert’s diary (this is more evident in the book and first movie than it is in the remake). She may blame Dolores for ruining her dreams of the future and she may view her as a pest & and annoyance, it wasn’t all there was to their relationship.

 Charlotte and Dolores loved each other in their own odd way. It may have been dysfunctonal and even toxic, but at the end of the day they mattered to each other. Charlotte did her best to protect Dolores from Humbert and Dolores mourned her mother (even later calling Humbert her murderer) when she found out she’d died. They were a dysfunctional family but they were a family. 

[byeleeta]

THE DOLORES DYNAMIC  ( 1 / ? ) - How the Hazes began 

Elements of the Dolores Dynamic are taken from the content of Nabokov’s novel &. both film adaptations. It’s a mix of canon material, headcanon material, and context-based inferences. Do not take any elements from the Dolores Dynamic

Dolores was the result of an unplanned teenage pregnancy. Charlotte was nineteen when she gave birth to Dolores &. dropped out of school to raise her with the man who’d gotten her pregnant- Samuel Haze. Samuel was the son of a wealthy businessman who purchased the Haze household for him and Charlotte.  Samuel worked for his father as a door-to-door salesman while Charlotte forfeited her dream of attending an academy of dance to take care of her daughter. Samuel’s father paid for nearly all of their expenses & Charlotte proceeded to live as elegant a life as she could. She held parties &. spent hundreds on creating a lavish garden. She never considered what would happen to her if that money went away. 

Samuel’s father died of a heart attack when Dolores was two years old &. Samuel followed three months after when he was shot for trespassing on a sales run, leaving Charlotte alone to pay the bills. She began teaching hostess classes as a way to simultaneously create income and take care of Dolores &. attempted to continue leading, at the very least, a lifestyle that appeared elegant to the outside eye. Her classes worked for a good ten years before she decided it would be easier to offer the up extra room in their house for rent. She originally only meant for it to be a means of income, but when she received word that a professor was looking for a place to stay, her plan changed. Charlotte saw Humbert as a chance to eventually marry back into money &. gain back the luxurious way of living she’d enjoyed before.

[byeleeta]

Hmmmmmmmm :/ 

[byeleeta]

THE DOLORES DYNAMIC  ( 1 / ? ) - How the Hazes began 

Elements of the Dolores Dynamic are taken from the content of Nabokov’s novel &. both film adaptations. It’s a mix of canon material, headcanon material, and context-based inferences. Do not take any elements from the Dolores Dynamic

Dolores was the result of an unplanned teenage pregnancy. Charlotte was nineteen when she gave birth to Dolores &. dropped out of school to raise her with the man who’d gotten her pregnant- Samuel Haze. Samuel was the son of a wealthy businessman who purchased the Haze household for him and Charlotte.  Samuel worked for his father as a door-to-door salesman while Charlotte forfeited her dream of attending an academy of dance to take care of her daughter. Samuel’s father paid for nearly all of their expenses & Charlotte proceeded to live as elegant a life as she could. She held parties &. spent hundreds on creating a lavish garden. She never considered what would happen to her if that money went away. 

Samuel’s father died of a heart attack when Dolores was two years old &. Samuel followed three months after when he was shot for trespassing on a sales run, leaving Charlotte alone to pay the bills. She began teaching hostess classes as a way to simultaneously create income and take care of Dolores &. attempted to continue leading, at the very least, a lifestyle that appeared elegant to the outside eye. Her classes worked for a good ten years before she decided it would be easier to offer the up extra room in their house for rent. She originally only meant for it to be a means of income, but when she received word that a professor was looking for a place to stay, her plan changed. Charlotte saw Humbert as a chance to eventually marry back into money &. gain back the luxurious way of living she’d enjoyed before.

[byeleeta]

Hmmmmmmmm :/ 

[byeleeta]

"if I need to read the book than how am I portraying her so well"

HONEY. YOU AREN'T. HER PERSONALITY IS ALL WRONG.

[byeleeta]

Did Dolores ever love Humbert?

The short answer to your question is  NO ,  Dolores did not love Humbert . 

The longer answer to your question is a lot more complex than a simple yes / no answer. When Humbert first arrived at the Haze household, Dolores did develop a small crush on Humbert. He was smart, interesting, and looked like her favorite movie star. He fascinated her. While she constantly competed with her mother for Humbert’s attention it wasn’t because she fancied him so much as it was her wanting to annoy Charlotte as much as humanly possible. 

When her mother died and the events of Lolita occured, Dolores found herself growing less and less fond of Humbert ( as one would expect ). Her fascination with his stories &. mannerisims faded as she got to know the kind of man he really was &. she found herself wishing he’d never met her and her mother. She grew to truly  LOATHE  Humbert. 

Dolores’ hatred for Humbert manifested itself several times throughout the course of “Lolita” often in small acts of defiance or annoyance. Being trapped with a man who could do anything to her anytime he wanted limited her options and her best option was to feign fondness for Humbert as a way to disguise her antics as harmless. During emotional confrontations, Dolores’ hatred manifested itself in much truer colors. She would scream &. yell at him -  call him a monster &. a murderer amongst other things.  Though they would always “make up” to an extent, Dolores never believed, nor truly accepted Humbert’s apologies.