🐞 an analysis of kagami tsurugi from the tokyo special to s06e13 yaksi gozen & s06e18 the dirtifiers 🐉
“i make everyone around me suffer.”
“what would’ve made everyone suffer is your mother succeeding in turning you into the ruthless and lone warrior she wanted. but you always found the strength inside yourself to love and help other people. and right now, the only one suffering is you.”
i know the tokyo special is focused around kagami's struggles and guilt surrounding kazuno and her former friend group in japan, but i think it really ties in to what was demonstrated in yaksi gozen and the dirtifiers; how kagami really took marinette's words (and kazuno's, "promise me you won't be afraid to share your feelings again, or confess to your weaknesses") to heart and chose to express her anger towards her mother's expectations, finally feeling free enough to do so. this scene in their bedroom really shows how much trust marinette has in kagami, and (while we already knew of this trait from previous instances) how easy it is for kagami to put herself down for mistakes. marinette urges her to learn from them, to allow herself to ask for help. and kagami doesn't shy away when marinette cuddles up against her in an attempt at comforting her.
then they return to france after helping the stellar force and making amends with kazuno. kagami seems more like herself. so in a way, the tokyo special gave us a fraction of kagami's backstory and the reason she seems much more confident in season six.
supposedly yaksi gozen would be the next plot point in the chronological order, but it's hard to tell whether the dirtifiers stands in front of it. in this episode, however, kagami's fit of outrage is centered around the fact that tomoe still doesn't see how kagami benefits more from forming relationships and having freedom rather than training and practicing and conforming to her standards.
"she (ladybug) trusted me (...) enough to leave me the dragon miraculous knowing i live under the same roof as you!"
and it's larger than just the restrictions. kagami is a senti-child; a daughter born from the peacock miraculous, and living with that knowledge is a burden not only in itself, but it goes side by side with a secret only known by a few people; that being gabriel agreste's actions as monarch and tomoe tsurugi's aid in said actions. her daughter shouldn't have to remind her that she's basically saving her from a life sentence at this point! though, of course there's aspects that kagami and marinette aren't aware of, like the whole lila being chrysalis and kagami's sister (which i'm still getting used to believing myself), and the "council" of sorts that nathalie is also a part of (??). irrelevant for this analysis though.
"do you realize how lucky we are to still have each other? please don't ruin everything."
despite everything, of course she still tries to express care towards her mother. i think that's something she's learned from marinette and possibly félix and/or adrien, because in past circumstances, she'd leave or run away after confrontation. instead, she's bearing her heart for her mother to see that she still wants a relationship with her, but that tomoe has to do better and truly understand kagami's emotions for that to happen. kagami has learned that relationships don't have to be one-sided. she'd learned that her own actions aren't always the root of the problem. a lot of the time they weren't, and it was only the expectations her mother instilled in her that led her to believe that if she wasn't the best, then there was no point at all. returning from tokyo to paris shattered that ideology in kagami.
but she was still held back.
in the dirtifiers, it's revealed that kagami has a "social allowance" that restricts her from seeing a certain number of friends each week or weekend. and then comes kagami finally asking her mother the big question.
"so why did you make me?"
and she's answered with a duel and more indirect responses.
"i wish i could've been your daughter, but all i'll ever be to you is a trophy."
all of this emotion has blossomed from kagami witnessing the contrast between she and her mother's relationship and her friends and their families. ladybug finds ryuko sulking in the clouds, and tries once again to be reassuring with words, but they don't work, not like they did in the tokyo special. so she offers a hug instead, and that's all that kagami needed.
and at the end of the episode, ryuko purposefully seeks out ladybug after the akuma was put away, standing before her for a moment before stepping forward and wrapping her arms around her.
signifying the first time (if my memory serves) kagami has ever initiated physical affection towards a friend. everyone has always reached for her and offered her their arms and their embrace, but this is the first time she wants it so much that she's willing to show it first. and it's even more meaningful that she shares this moment with marinette, someone who has taken loads of advice from kagami, and who has been able to give that good deed back and offer her advice in return. two smart and stubborn girls who find each other in their darkest moments. not just because they know each other's secrets, but because they're a mirror of each other, in a way.
and so she's confident enough to disregard her mother when she arrives home, ignoring tomoe's praise. praise that is worded to sound meant for kagami, but is really for herself.
"soft heart under scales."
