walks around the dashboard with my hands behind my back like someone's grandpa
Acquired Stardust
taylor price
cherry valley forever

Kiana Khansmith
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
I'd rather be in outer space 🛸

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Not today Justin

Kaledo Art
Claire Keane
AnasAbdin

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shark vs the universe
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izzy's playlists!
styofa doing anything

@theartofmadeline
YOU ARE THE REASON
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

Love Begins
seen from United States

seen from United States

seen from Japan

seen from Germany

seen from United States
seen from Vietnam

seen from Germany

seen from Türkiye
seen from United States
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seen from Belgium
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seen from T1

seen from Malaysia
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@camoooh
walks around the dashboard with my hands behind my back like someone's grandpa
the intimacy of being silly together
How the bloody hell are ya? Miss your posts 😭
Ahhh! I'm so good actually! Life is great so I'm barely on here anymore. Thriving in the real world ❤️
Are you still in contact with Dane (guywiththeroses)?
Nah haven't heard from him since he deactivated sorry
me as a 14th century knight: this sucks i'm gonna fms (translator's note: fall on my sword)
Alternatively: fuck my squire
[remembers falling on my sword jokes negatively impact my knight's oath] ...fuck my squire
Centre For Useless Splendour
Place: the Centre for Useless Splendour
i make a mean soup
Now make one that is beautiful and true
Lemon, thyme and arctic char
[ID: A photo of a fish, lemon slices, and herbs embroidered on a pale fabric with knickknacks visible in the corners. The fish is gray-green, like the stalks of herbs, with a red belly, tail, and fins. It is shaded in with streaks of embroidered thread. To the side are yellow slices of lemon. /end ID.]
santa deniers on science-mas eve hearing charles darwin evolving down the chimney
Okay so I'm a security guard, right
And part of why I like my job is cause I'm pretty good at deescalating conflicts without violence or police involvement
And that *might* be because my primary coping mechanism for stress is humor, and if the guy in the uniform isn't stressed out, usually nobody else is either
But anyhow today I witnessed a crime, which 911 had already been called for
And I'm telling the guy, you know, as he's running away, that nobody's gonna touch him, we don't do that here, I don't have any weapons and he can totally walk on out if he wants to
And he gives me this 'go-fuck-yourself" type answer, right? As you do
And I fucking
I fucking. Start danCING
I DONT KNOW WHY
I WAS JUST LIKE "aight guess I'll go fuck myself then, cheerio" AND START FUCKING DANCING
LIKE MY BRAIN WAS LIKE "Cool not being attacked, gotta keep the witnessed calm, gotta stay chill and breezy" AND THE PHYSICAL RESPONSE FOR THAT WAS TO SYART DOING THIS SASSY FUCKING JIG
I DIDNT EVEN REALIZR I WAS FDOUNG IT UNTIL SOMEONE POIU TED IT OUT AFTER
and it all ended fine and the dude is in custody and I get a call from my boss like "Yeah we're gonna need to send footage to police"
AND
FUCKING
THIS IS GOING TO BE SHOWN IN COURT SOMEWHERE
IM DOUNG A SRUPID LITTLE DANCE ON CAMERA AS THIS GUY LOSES HIS MIND AND ITS GONNA BE ON COURT SOMEWHERW
THIS IS THE STUPIDEST FUCKING THING IVE WVER DONE
I HATE MYSELFD
THE LITERAL FUCKING PROCESS
the more i try to explain gender to cis people the more i understand plato's allegory of a cave
plato: the shadows are like a surface level understanding and coming out of the cave and seeing the actual objects is what being a philosopher is like
me: this is stupid and pretentious
cis person: girl is when pink and flower and boy is when blue and guns
me: oh no theyre still in the cave
FUCK.
Adding "oh no they're still in the cave" to my vocabulary.
how did they know
john raul porge and gringo
middle aged lady on my bus just called someone's partner "your whimsical idiot boyfriend" over the phone . with sincere frustration might I add
brand new pikmin character his name is newport and he loves cigarettes look for him in pikmin 5 and 6
little miss awful body temperature regulation is taking his hoodie off again
little miss awful body temperature regulation has put his hoodie back on
how it feels to ask a question at work