So, I basically forgot this blog exists (again). But the love of my life (aka @dramadreamer14) convinced me to watch Supernatural last week, so I thought I'd tell y'all how it's going.
The lighting in Season 1 is making me wish I could keep turning up the brightness on my laptop. What's up with that? Lol
CONTENTS — drabble; post-ca:cw; angst; tiny bits of fluff if you squint; hurt/comfort; established relationship; tw:grief?
SUMMARY — you find out why steve hasn’t been sleeping lately.
WORD COUNT — 513
✩ read on ao3
✩ chris evans characters m.list
✩ library blog
On the surface, it doesn’t seem like much has changed.
He walks into the safe house and people see their ever-dependable captain, his back straight and chin lifted, oozing authority and control even if he’s not technically captain anymore.
But you see it—the dark circles, the slight drooping of his shoulders, the irritability, the pained rubbing of his temples when he thought no one was looking, and the off-by-a-millisecond slowed reaction times out in the field.
He’s tired. Steve hasn’t been sleeping.
It has been a hard couple of months; being on the run takes its toll, but there’s a hint of something else in his features you just can’t seem to place.
When you gather the courage to ask him, he brushes you off. When you stand there, dejected, watching his retreating back with resignation and sadness, Steve turns towards you just before he steps out into the night.
He offers you a sad smile, forced and unnatural, before promising you that everything is fine. For the first time, you don’t believe him. Steve has always been a terrible liar.
When you tiptoe into his room late one night, you’re not at all surprised to find him on the floor. Sometimes he preferred it there, but this time you pause for a second.
Bucky is lying fast asleep just mere inches away, his metal arm curled under his head, his dark brown hair splayed out across a pillow.
You almost smile at the sight of the two recently reunited best friends sleeping on the floor like they’re two boys at a sleepover.
Except Steve is awake. He looks too afraid to even blink, let alone sleep.
He doesn’t acknowledge you until you’ve settled down on the floor quietly behind him. Your hand splays carefully over his shoulder, and then he’s leaning back against you.
Bucky stirs, a sleepy sound escaping his lips, but doesn’t wake from what looks to be his first peaceful slumber in decades.
Steve gasps softly, releasing a shuddering breath.
Realization dawns. However improbable, someone he loves isn’t dead. Someone he loves has come back to life. Now that the chaos of it has died down a little, Steve needs some time to process that life-altering information.
“This could be a dream,” he whispers, his eyes wide and terrified.
“It’s not,” you whisper back. Heart wrenching, you lean down to wrap your arms around him, tears springing to your eyes when his tense shoulders begin to tremble.
“How do we know?”
“Sleep, Steve.”
“What if—what if he’s gone when I open my eyes?”
“I’ll keep an eye on him for you,” you swear as you lean down to kiss his temple. Despite his fears, his eyelids begin to droop.
“Promise?” He asks, sounding much smaller than he is.
“Promise.”
By the time you’ve finished speaking the word, Steve has finally drifted off, entrusting the personification of his very own heart into your two hands. You watch over them both until morning.
It has been a few years since I've read any Marvel fanfiction and I'm ending that hiatus with your wonderful drabble. Thank you so much for writing this. It certainly satisfied my need to read an extremely well-written fic that takes place post-CACW, even if it's a short drabble.
What I liked about this drabble is the way you describe Steve's physical appearance. Of course, we already know what he looks like. But the way you describe it here with "the dark circles, the slight drooping of his shoulders, the irritabability, the pained rubbing of his temples when he thought no one was looking" paints a clear picture to me as a reader. I can see it clearly in my head.
Similarly, the way you describe the scenario of how it feels to be on the run takes me right back to the CACW era. I'm back in that headspace. You set the scene really well. As someone who has read plenty of fics that were set in that time, I am certainly grateful to have found this fic. I feel a certain sense of nostalgia while reading it, because I haven't been on this blog in about four years. I found this fic as soon as I came back online and I'm so glad that I did.
As the scene starts and you describe how Steve prefers to sleep on the floor sometimes, I was reminded of the fact that he's a soldier. Of course, he would find comfort in sleeping on the floor during this time in which he's under a lot of stress. It makes sense. It's little details like that that truly make a good fic and I appreciate that you took the effort to include that in here.
Additionally, I love how you portrayed the emotions Steve is feeling by describing "he looks too afraid to even blink, let alone sleep". These little descriptions paint a bigger picture, which allows me as a reader to better understand the mindset that Steve's under.
The fact that he's terrified that Bucky may not be himself when he wakes up is to be expected in a fic that's set post CACW, but the way you've written it certainly brought me a little suspense. By the time I got to the end, I was left satisfied by the fact that I've read such a well-written fic after a very long time.
Thank you so much for writing it. You've reminded me why I loved being a part of the Marvel fandom and I'm so glad I came back in time to be able read this fic. I hope to read more of your works roon. <3
wow, i am so honoured you decided to break your marvel hiatus with my fic!! 😭💕 this is one of my favourite drabbles i’ve written, i love exploring steve as a character during the ca:cw era. thank you so much for reading, i really loved your detailed commentary!
(i really wish i were better at responding to these; i really am so grateful and i promise you i’ll be thinking about this every time i come back to this fic 💖🫶🏻)
Honestly, I couldn't have found a better fic to break my hiatus with. It was truly amazing! It's definitely one of my favourite drabbles I've ever read and I'll also be coming back to it whenever I need to read a well-written Steve fic. You can always expect this kind of detailed commentary from me. I love going full-on English teacher mode when I read fics, so I hope you don't mind that I'll be doing that with your fics too.
Also, you don't have to respond to these at all. I know I tend to go off in my comments and I can understand that responding to them can be extremely time-consuming. This is just my way of showing some love for your writing. <3
CONTENTS — drabble; established relationship; a light dusting of spice; fluff?; and merry christmas eve my darlings! 💕
SUMMARY — you follow steve into a dark closet 😏
WORD COUNT — 476
✩ read on ao3
✩ chris evans characters m.list
✩ library blog
It takes Steve a few seconds for his mind to catch up to what’s happening.
He went to the linen closet to grab some paper towels when he spilled champagne all over himself like an idiot, only to find that the kitchen was all out. He’d just grabbed a new roll when you came striding up behind him, shoving him into the closet and closing the door behind you.
Then your hands were on him, roaming enthusiastically over the ugly, scratchy wool sweater stretched over his torso. He’d bought it earlier this week at a thrift store, endlessly amused when it lit up obnoxiously with the flick of a switch.
“Honey—” he startles, especially when your hands fist into his sweater so you can spin around and pin him against the door. He allows himself to be manhandled, despite grunting softly upon impact out of sheer surprise.
You make a small, pleased sound at the back of your throat, before leaning up on your toes to kiss him.
“Sweetheart—” he mumbles against your eager lips, already a little breathless when you giggle at knocking over some nearby rolls of wrapping paper and a box containing a stray bundle of shiny tinsel in your haste to get him alone.
“Yes, Steve?” You purr, your hands on his chest pushing him firmly against the door, grinning wildly when his eyes go wide and his cheeks flush.
“But the party—”
Music is still audible through the door, turned up so loud he can feel the bass thumping against his back. Surely, the other guests and the hosts have noticed both your absences by now.
“But you just look so…” you trail off with a sigh, scanning him up and down. Steve’s never been one to care about his looks, but—oh, he’s seen that look before; your eyes sparkling with barely contained mischief, your bottom lip tucked between your teeth, and one of your legs slotting between his.
He almost chokes on nothing. His cheeks burn once again, but of course he likes it very much when you get all handsy.
Steve quickly grasps the hem of his sweater, ready to whip it across the tiny closet when you stop him with a gentle hand. “No, leave it on.”
“Really?” He asks with an incredulous smile, looking down at the red and green abomination of fabric. It was perfect for the holiday party the Starks are currently throwing in the other room, but this is interesting. “The sweater’s doing it for you?”
The only answer you give is a salacious grin of your own and, “shut the hell up and touch me already.”
Steve only hesitates for a split second before grinning and turning on his light up sweater, his large hands palming the curve of your hips and then sliding even further.
After enjoying the last drabble I read from you, I couldn't resist coming back for more and I'm so glad I decided to read this one. I'm a sucker for established relationship and holiday-themed fics. This was exactly what I needed when I got home after class.
First of all, I really like the way you set up the scene with just a few lines. As someone who's never been able to write short drabbles, I admire how you allow the readers to visualize what's going on before you start the scene. I think that's a very important skill for a writer.
The description of a scratchy sweater bought at the thrift store is very simple, but I think that tiny little thing can have a much deeper meaning into Steve's character. Of course, he would shop at a thrift store. Of course, he would be cautious about consumer culture and sustainability. This simple detail is enough to bring out the Steve Rogers that we know and love. I've read many fics in the past that don't always incorporate these character traits that we love so much in canon and it often infuriates me. But it's clear to me that you have a distinct understanding of Steve's character and personality, so much so that you're about to bring out the essence of it in this drabble with something as simple as him shopping at the thrift store.
Over the years, I slowly lost my interest in reading spice. Not many people have been able to write the kind of smut that I like reading. But I really liked the level of spice you added with the limited amount of words you used. Very well done!
pairing: carter baizen x reader
word count: 2525
warnings: tooth rotting fluff,
prompt: dad!au
summary: in which the hotel pastry chef entertains his 5 year old
author’s note: blame @captainscanadian for this. aj gave me all the dad!carter feels. christmas twist on it though. open ending in case i want to write more *wink wink*
oneshot | masterlist
You know that part in Elf where Buddy decks the mall out with paper decorations to further celebrate the joy of Christmas? That’s what the Hyacinth Hotel lobby looked like. Like Buddy the Elf had personally decorated it.
As soon as guests walked in they were metaphorically transported to the North Pole. There was a huge Christmas tree in the centre of the lobby, decorated perfectly. Dustings of tinsel dripped from the pine, with gorgeous red, white and gold baubles hanging from the end of the branches. An elaborate train track was set up to rotate around the tree, and there were even boxes wrapped and placed under the tree.
All empty, unfortunately. Purely for decoration. Simply to add to the Christmas spirit, which all of the children loved.
But if you looked closely, you’d see that all of the baubles were decorated differently. All within the same colour scheme, but personalised by the children who attended the holiday club the hotel ran. Some had their names. Some had glitter, sequins, and ribbons adding to theirs.
I still remember the day you wrote it like it was yesterday!!! I'll never forget how giddy I was! Oh I missed you so much. I'm going to re-read all of your stuff once I get settled!!! ❤️❤️❤️
Well, that makes two of us. There's never a shortage for fandoms, is there? Lol
Oh yes, I am back on this island now. I have been here since September. I have never liked Jaffa Cakes and I never will. Although I do love my McVities Dark Chocolate Digestives and Walkers Prawn Cocktail crisps. I'm glad to have them both back in my life!
Yeah... that's fair. Naynay's American, so I completely get it. Thankfully, I've got a Canadian passport and I live in the UK. Otherwise, I'm just as screwed. We're going to get through this, Lani. <3
OMG THANKS! We've been engaged for a while now, but it was about time that we told everyone on this hellsite that we were together... you know, since we started off as mutuals on here before we started dating during COVID. Lol
No but like I remember just having a feeling that you guys would end up together. Idk what it was but your guys’ chemistry on here was it, ya know? I’m so happy for yall!
Wait... what? For real??? We definitely had no fucking clue that we were on the road to marriage at the time lol I mean, I guess your intuitions are on point!!! Lol thank you! <3
i definitely didn't think yall were gonna engaged but i just had a feeling you two would end up being a couple. LOL. guess we shocked ourselves with the end result.
Well, that makes two of us. There's never a shortage for fandoms, is there? Lol
Oh yes, I am back on this island now. I have been here since September. I have never liked Jaffa Cakes and I never will. Although I do love my McVities Dark Chocolate Digestives and Walkers Prawn Cocktail crisps. I'm glad to have them both back in my life!
Yeah... that's fair. Naynay's American, so I completely get it. Thankfully, I've got a Canadian passport and I live in the UK. Otherwise, I'm just as screwed. We're going to get through this, Lani. <3
OMG THANKS! We've been engaged for a while now, but it was about time that we told everyone on this hellsite that we were together... you know, since we started off as mutuals on here before we started dating during COVID. Lol
No but like I remember just having a feeling that you guys would end up together. Idk what it was but your guys’ chemistry on here was it, ya know? I’m so happy for yall!
Wait... what? For real??? We definitely had no fucking clue that we were on the road to marriage at the time lol I mean, I guess your intuitions are on point!!! Lol thank you! <3
i definitely didn't think yall were gonna engaged but i just had a feeling you two would end up being a couple. LOL. guess we shocked ourselves with the end result.
Oh no, we only started dating in December of 2020 and we kept it a secret from pretty much everyone. Technically, we hadn't even met in person because of COVID. That happened in 2022. We didn't get engaged until the summer of 2024. But it's so weird that you were able to notice our chemistry even then. I guess we weren't as subtle as we thought we were! Haha
Well, that makes two of us. There's never a shortage for fandoms, is there? Lol
Oh yes, I am back on this island now. I have been here since September. I have never liked Jaffa Cakes and I never will. Although I do love my McVities Dark Chocolate Digestives and Walkers Prawn Cocktail crisps. I'm glad to have them both back in my life!
Yeah... that's fair. Naynay's American, so I completely get it. Thankfully, I've got a Canadian passport and I live in the UK. Otherwise, I'm just as screwed. We're going to get through this, Lani. <3
OMG THANKS! We've been engaged for a while now, but it was about time that we told everyone on this hellsite that we were together... you know, since we started off as mutuals on here before we started dating during COVID. Lol
No but like I remember just having a feeling that you guys would end up together. Idk what it was but your guys’ chemistry on here was it, ya know? I’m so happy for yall!
Wait... what? For real??? We definitely had no fucking clue that we were on the road to marriage at the time lol I mean, I guess your intuitions are on point!!! Lol thank you! <3
Uh, I don’t know who you are, but you’re somehow all over my dash right now, so welcome back, I guess!! Glad to have you returning to the fandom!! 🫶🏻
Oh my God, hello! Tumblr's algorithm is really something else, isn't it? Ahaha thank you so much for the warm welcome! Allow me introduce myself then. I'm AJ, I'm 26 years old and I was active on this blog from 2019-2021. I went on an extended hiatus after COVID happened and I decided to come back now because I was just missing it all.
I used to write reader insert fics on this blog for Bucky Barnes, Steve Rogers, Carter Baizen, Nate Archibald and many more! I have since taken down my old fics and I'm planning to re-write some of them. In the meantime, I'm just browsing the tags and brushing up on my reading. :)
It's so nice to meet you! I'm happy to have some new friends! <3
Yeah... that's fair. Naynay's American, so I completely get it. Thankfully, I've got a Canadian passport and I live in the UK. Otherwise, I'm just as screwed. We're going to get through this, Lani. <3
OMG THANKS! We've been engaged for a while now, but it was about time that we told everyone on this hellsite that we were together... you know, since we started off as mutuals on here before we started dating during COVID. Lol
CONTENTS — drabble; post-ca:cw; angst; tiny bits of fluff if you squint; hurt/comfort; established relationship; tw:grief?
SUMMARY — you find out why steve hasn’t been sleeping lately.
WORD COUNT — 513
✩ read on ao3
✩ chris evans characters m.list
✩ library blog
On the surface, it doesn’t seem like much has changed.
He walks into the safe house and people see their ever-dependable captain, his back straight and chin lifted, oozing authority and control even if he’s not technically captain anymore.
But you see it—the dark circles, the slight drooping of his shoulders, the irritability, the pained rubbing of his temples when he thought no one was looking, and the off-by-a-millisecond slowed reaction times out in the field.
He’s tired. Steve hasn’t been sleeping.
It has been a hard couple of months; being on the run takes its toll, but there’s a hint of something else in his features you just can’t seem to place.
When you gather the courage to ask him, he brushes you off. When you stand there, dejected, watching his retreating back with resignation and sadness, Steve turns towards you just before he steps out into the night.
He offers you a sad smile, forced and unnatural, before promising you that everything is fine. For the first time, you don’t believe him. Steve has always been a terrible liar.
When you tiptoe into his room late one night, you’re not at all surprised to find him on the floor. Sometimes he preferred it there, but this time you pause for a second.
Bucky is lying fast asleep just mere inches away, his metal arm curled under his head, his dark brown hair splayed out across a pillow.
You almost smile at the sight of the two recently reunited best friends sleeping on the floor like they’re two boys at a sleepover.
Except Steve is awake. He looks too afraid to even blink, let alone sleep.
He doesn’t acknowledge you until you’ve settled down on the floor quietly behind him. Your hand splays carefully over his shoulder, and then he’s leaning back against you.
Bucky stirs, a sleepy sound escaping his lips, but doesn’t wake from what looks to be his first peaceful slumber in decades.
Steve gasps softly, releasing a shuddering breath.
Realization dawns. However improbable, someone he loves isn’t dead. Someone he loves has come back to life. Now that the chaos of it has died down a little, Steve needs some time to process that life-altering information.
“This could be a dream,” he whispers, his eyes wide and terrified.
“It’s not,” you whisper back. Heart wrenching, you lean down to wrap your arms around him, tears springing to your eyes when his tense shoulders begin to tremble.
“How do we know?”
“Sleep, Steve.”
“What if—what if he’s gone when I open my eyes?”
“I’ll keep an eye on him for you,” you swear as you lean down to kiss his temple. Despite his fears, his eyelids begin to droop.
“Promise?” He asks, sounding much smaller than he is.
“Promise.”
By the time you’ve finished speaking the word, Steve has finally drifted off, entrusting the personification of his very own heart into your two hands. You watch over them both until morning.
It has been a few years since I've read any Marvel fanfiction and I'm ending that hiatus with your wonderful drabble. Thank you so much for writing this. It certainly satisfied my need to read an extremely well-written fic that takes place post-CACW, even if it's a short drabble.
What I liked about this drabble is the way you describe Steve's physical appearance. Of course, we already know what he looks like. But the way you describe it here with "the dark circles, the slight drooping of his shoulders, the irritabability, the pained rubbing of his temples when he thought no one was looking" paints a clear picture to me as a reader. I can see it clearly in my head.
Similarly, the way you describe the scenario of how it feels to be on the run takes me right back to the CACW era. I'm back in that headspace. You set the scene really well. As someone who has read plenty of fics that were set in that time, I am certainly grateful to have found this fic. I feel a certain sense of nostalgia while reading it, because I haven't been on this blog in about four years. I found this fic as soon as I came back online and I'm so glad that I did.
As the scene starts and you describe how Steve prefers to sleep on the floor sometimes, I was reminded of the fact that he's a soldier. Of course, he would find comfort in sleeping on the floor during this time in which he's under a lot of stress. It makes sense. It's little details like that that truly make a good fic and I appreciate that you took the effort to include that in here.
Additionally, I love how you portrayed the emotions Steve is feeling by describing "he looks too afraid to even blink, let alone sleep". These little descriptions paint a bigger picture, which allows me as a reader to better understand the mindset that Steve's under.
The fact that he's terrified that Bucky may not be himself when he wakes up is to be expected in a fic that's set post CACW, but the way you've written it certainly brought me a little suspense. By the time I got to the end, I was left satisfied by the fact that I've read such a well-written fic after a very long time.
Thank you so much for writing it. You've reminded me why I loved being a part of the Marvel fandom and I'm so glad I came back in time to be able read this fic. I hope to read more of your works roon. <3
After a four year hiatus, I am back on this blog and ready to write again. I've taken down all of my old fics, because I feel like my writing has improved a lot since then. However, I am going to start off by saying that I am taking requests for the following characters & AUs.