“i can’t do this anymore” says a girl who is not only going to do it but do it well
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祝日 / Permanent Vacation

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@caraphernellic
“i can’t do this anymore” says a girl who is not only going to do it but do it well
I'm like if a girl had the urge to scream and break something all the time but stays quiet instead
the thing about Dean Winchester is he's an American movie action hero and he's a barbie doll and he's a cowboy on a steel horse he rides and he's the movie lead and he's michael the archangel and he's never getting the starring role and he's a primadonna girl all he ever wanted was the world and he's half a step in hell and he's a daddy's boy and he's the executioner and he's a family man and he just wants so so much and he's the protagonist killing the monster and he's empty beyond belief and he's the sheriff and he's meat for the apocalypse and he's the angry man in the house there will always be an angry man in the house.
Ex Libris
Author: marbleflan
Artist: Djedo
Rating: Explicit
Pairings: Dean Winchester/Castiel
Length: 24930
Warnings: N/A
Tags: mutual pining, established relationship, secret relationship, smart Dean, misunderstandings
Summary: Dean and Cas have been meeting up, and hooking up, at the New York Antiquarian Book Fair for going on ten years. Just when Dean thinks they might be able to evolve into something more, Cas drops some news that could spell the end of their relationship once and for all. Will their personal and professional lives keep pulling them apart, or can they make this crazy long distance, cross country casual affair into a commitment worth fighting for? Featuring Dean as a counter-culture bookseller with an encyclopedic knowledge of 20th century duplicating technologies and Cas as a beleaguered curator plagued by library bureaucracy.
Link to Fic | Link to Art
Destiel Fic Recs
It's that time of year where nobody knows what day it is or how they got there, so why not hide from your family/boss to read Destiel fics. And friends, this last list of 2022 may be the best so far.
The Leap by FriendofCarlotta @friendofcarlotta (Explicit, 82k words)
I don't know how to explain the way 91W lit up my brain like one of those old electricity balls at Spencer's but I thought I would never have that experience again until this fic came along. It's a very different, much softer story, but this fic has the 91W vibes that make you want to crunch on your own bones (vintage gay sadness is the tag we live in here). Its so deeply rooted in a sense of place and time. Dean and Cas are so clearly and immediately bonded and kept apart by circumstance. The longing y'all. The way they can't help but fall in love at the risk of their lives and freedom. It's gorgeous.
The fic is set in post WWII occupied Berlin in a divided Germany just before the wall goes up. Cas is a closeted police officer in East Berlin, trying his best to survive under a brutal dictatorship in an environment in which reporting your neighbors is not just encouraged, but expected. Dean is an American-born mechanic residing in West Berlin. For both of them, falling in love with a man could mean arrest, prosecution, and worse.
But they can't help the instant attraction between them. Neither of them is ready to walk away from the hope of a future together, as impossible of a dream as that is.
Beyond the 91W vibes, the thing about this fic is that the canon parallels are just so beautiful. Cas is expected to comply with a rigid hierarchy and to obey absolutely. Dean is trying his best to find optimism for those around him, and he has an irresistible early seasons charm and brashness that makes you fall instantly in love with him. And while there is period homophobia and oppression in this fic, FriendofCarlotta also pulls so much queer joy into the story. A slice of gorgeous community built against all odds and euphoria at finding love and family and shelter in the most hostile of places.
This story made me ugly cry (a true feat) and it's one of those stories you finish and consider turning back to Chapter 1 and reading it all over again. Seriously. Go read it then yell at me about it.
The Law of Equivalent Exchange by awed_frog @awed-frog (Mature, 60k)
This is the fic you have to read in one sitting because you don't want to be crushed by a falling desk like in Mystery Spot and never see the ending. It is gorgeous in a way that I think may have irrevocably changed me. A testament to love and devotion that left me absolutely breathless.
Cas, Angel of Tears, is assigned to watch over the lives of two brothers, tied together and experiencing hundreds of lifetimes of sorrow and joy in preparation for some mysterious Heavenly plan. His mission is to watch over a green-eyed boy, to guide him into each next life. The human doesn't know, doesn't remember (mostly), but it's impossible to ignore the growing bond between them. Cas finds himself inexorably changed by watching the many lives he experiences.
This is a canon fic (and tbh if you don't know canon the middle is going to confuse you because it's a reimagining of canon events with this context). That means awed-frog has somehow managed to make the crunchy Destiel scenes even more heart wrenching (extra crispy?).
This fic had me crying by Chapter 2. It's just a beautiful sweeping epic. And it does have a soft and beautiful landing. I will be thinking about it for awhile.
Märchen by tiamatv (Mature, 93k)
Fairy tale princess Dean Winchester. That's the delightful headline for this really fun and inventive fic. Dean of Winchester is the eldest prince but he lacks magic, making his brother the heir. What else do you do with a spare but promise to marry him off for political reasons, in this case to Michael, an Angel from a neighboring kingdom who lent his swords to Winchester to defeat the demons.
But Dean isn't gonna be some kept pretty thing, so he shocks everyone by saying no. Michael won't marry Dean without his consent, but that term is used very loosely, as angels do. So Dean is locked in a tower full of monsters where he is cursed to remain until he consents or finds his true love.
It's a tale as old as time (yes I said that), but there are some delightfully fresh elements. From Charlie the dragon princess (marry me, Charlie) to a sentient carnivorous hedge, the quirky characters make this fic impossible to put down. There are also some delightful genre choices such as an omnipotent narrator that make this fic feel comforting yet fresh.
In the end, you will be rooting for the angel knight and his prince to slay their inner demons.
A Crash Course in Computer Safety by followthattardis @debatchery (Explicit, 29k)
I love a good fusion and as a fan of the show Chuck, this Chuck Destiel AU absolutely slaps. If you are unfamiliar with the show, it's still an absolutely fun ride. Dean is stuck working at a Best Buy rip off as essentially a member of the Geek Squad. His life is in shambles after his best friend got him expelled from Stanford and stole his girlfriend, but he's making due.
That is until a mysterious email from his ex best friend throws him into a world of intrigue. Suddenly he's got the CIA and the NSA breathing down his neck. Even worse, he has to pretend to be dating the scorching hot CIA operative as a cover.
The Destiel feels are surprisingly potent for a mash-up, and the story is paced so well you won't want to put it down. Bonus points for perfect use of Henriksen.
Buckle up and cue up Short Skirt-Long Jacket by Cake.
The Shadow in the Corner by MalMuses @malmuses (Explicit, 47k)
I don't know that there are many fic writers who excel so thoroughly at classic romance as MalMuses. Her fics bring such a fantastic mix of horny, humor and softness. This one is no exception.
A Victorian steampunk story, this one is set in an alternative timeline where magic is known and the MOL openly fight monsters. Dean aka the Red Hand is tasked with a special investigation - to solve why a monster seems to be targeting the head of the agency's little brother, Castiel.
There's a good bit if mystery and intrigue, but the the headline for me was the delightful way Dean and Cas were both very aware of this instant connection and slowly orbiting each other as gravity pulled them closer. There's a softness to their relationship and it's largely external angst that keeps them apart as long as they are, but you never doubt that they are entirely gone for one another. Yes they suffer from perpetual horniness around each other, but its also very clear they genuinely like each other in a way that melted my cold dead heart.
In the end, a fun read with an exceptionally satisfying ending.
4:08 to Tombstone by Zuzeca (Explicit, 20k)
Cas is a Seraph with a mission: to save Dean Winchester, to retrieve the Michael Sword from Hell. But Dean perceives Hell not as it is, but instead as the wild west. Thrown into a bisexual cowboy fantasy, Cas has to navigate a dangerous escape while protecting this beautiful soul from those who would destroy it.
This fic is an absolute treasure. Amazing trueform angel descriptions, some gorgeous treatment of Dean’s Hell trauma, and a poignant bond between Dean and Cas that makes it a really sweet read (though mind the tags it gets dark). Its a really fun and novel take on the escape from Hell.
All That Remains by DoctorProfessorSong (Mature, 16k)
I am going to be annoying and self-rec here but I just released a fic I am super proud of. It's bittersweet and emotional and I poured my grief and parts of my soul into it. The tags are daunting but I do think it ends in a satisfying and hopeful place.
The stabfest story examines a canon divergent world where Dean is turned into a demon by the MOC, and Cas is forced to kill him to free him. He has a plan to save Dean, but it fails and Dean makes a deal with the Shadow to escape the Empty. The same deal as Cas. What follows is a reinterpretation of canon where both of them are unable to speak the truth because they risk losing it all.
It's a story about love and loss and hope. And perhaps most importantly it's a story about faith, not as some cheap fix-all, but as something that you hold in your heart in the darkest places.
Tag list below the cut. Let me know if you want to be tagged in future lists.
Pics that give "Dean Winchester is aged and happy" vibes.
Bonus: with Cas
Days of Our Lives Fan Club Weekend Luncheon - Universal Hilton: Universal City, CA - May 31, 1997 - photographer: Ed Geller / Celebrity Photo Agency
📽the slide collection series 📽 - higher quality on the drive
✨aka, jensen's very first fan convention✨
it was 3:42 pm. if you even care.
Jane Austen really said ‘I respect the “I can fix him” movement but that’s just not me. He’ll fix himself if knows what’s good for him’ and that’s why her works are still calling the shots today.
Meanwhile Emily Brönte just said “We can make each other worse.”
Mary Shelley said, "I can make him
yes i do the suffering yes i do the whining
Kintsugi (金継ぎ, "golden joinery"). As a philosophy, it treats breakage and repair as part of the history of an object, rather than something to disguise.
© base pics from deancascaps
Taglist under cut (ask to be added/removed, you know the drill).
I love him with all my heart
For my 5k Milestone Celebration - Day 1: Favorite character // Smile ↳ Dean Winchester + his cheeky smile 😛
dean is just. SO very special to me
17 and strung out on confusion
Trapped inside a role of disillusion
I found out what it takes to be a man
Now Mom and Dad will never understand
- Coming Clean / Green Day
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