antisocial loser

sick girl's blog

[carni-void]

blog where I post about being physically and mentally ill. Not a lot here other than me being strange and unusual where people I know can't see

Call me carnifex (she/he) or anything you want honestly.

I'm androgyne and transfem with a lot of issues but zero interest in actual diagnosis

posts here will mostly be content about szpd, aspd, npd, being schizospec, physical disability && being chronically ill, cotard's, identity issues, my rambling and related topics. Tagging system is as follows

#carni's mindlessness - general talking/most posts

#carni after dark - nsfw/dark/etc content. Will be tagged appropriately

#carni knows things - schizoposting. Probably gonna be weird

#carni's scrawlings - any writing of mine that I post

This is primarily a rambling and being mentally ill blog so I don't think I need much of an introduction but my askbox is open for anyone particularly nosey and because I like comments

[penetratingpalpations001]

That's right, pet my pumping heart.

[carni-void]

I last cut just a day or two ago but I feel so dulled and my mind is clawing at the walls for the bare minimum of stimulation to feel anything at all so I might just give in and get the boxcutter out so my brain can feel less like a padded room for a minute

[narcopthy]

my mental health hot take of the day is that i don't think fakeclaiming is terrible - to an extent.

if you don't know anything about the person and say they're faking just cause, obviously that's weird. but if someone is completely wrong about something they claim to have and you educate them and they pull the fakeclaiming card, that's stupid. i should be allowed to educate people on and call out misinformation about my own disorders and maybe they can consider something that better aligns with their experiences which is better in the long term. it's not healthy to fixate on a label you don't even know is correct so hard that you won't consider anything else. self diagnosis is valid with research, but with self diagnosis, you need adaptability too.

i found, a lot of the time, that people are so attached to the label that they will attack anyone who suggests otherwise, even psychologists and therapists. pop psychology and google and reddit and tiktok and tumblr have done irreparable damage to the mental health community 🥲

[infsomniac]

when someone tries to relate to me by saying that they also dont understand how to talk to people but i actually do understand it, i would just prefer to not do it.

[honeybunchesobees]

having a personality disorder is like 'yeah sometimes my true and honest thoughts sound like a 13 yr olds fanfic of a quote-unquote sociopath and i have to deal with the fact that there's absolutely nobody i can verbalize them to'