$LAYYYTER
PUT YOUR BEARD IN MY MOUTH
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
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EXPECTATIONS
Not today Justin
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Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her
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@carson-goldwyn-blog
“This is why we’re bros, Carson. You understand me. That’s exactly why he’s pudgy recently. I spoil him too much for his own good.”
“Forever bros, man. You love him way too much. Just make sure he can’t get into wherever you’re hiding those snacks.”
“It sounds boring and sad. Especially without the very handsome friend.”
“Have I ever mentioned how much I love you, H? Because I do.”
I’m surprised you’re so willing to let me drink you into the ground, honestly. Most guys would’ve jumped at the chance to get out of that wager.
If you do win, which I’m not sure if my ego could handle you winning.
That’s certainly not a creepy thing to say, at all.
That I’m excited to see a pretty face like yours around campus? I don’t think that’s creepy.
What? Didn’t have the balls to actually go talk to her, Cars?
I have all the balls to... If my boss wasn’t there to talk my ear off.
The right person for you won’t change who you are in any way but for the better. Theoretically.
I mean, there are people who did say that my ego is a bit much.
“We just vibe, bro.”
“Vibe? Dude, who are you?”
“Well most John Hughes movies has cliches, but those are the best cliches,” Tiffany said and gave a smile back. “Nice to meet you too Carson.”
“They’re not cliches though? Those are the classics,” he raised his eyebrow at her. “So tell me about yourself Tiffany. You look pretty young. A freshman?”
“It probably doesn’t work on all of the girls, but a guy with a good sense of humor, and a nice looking face to make it even better, probably wouldn’t need to put in a lot of effort. Just say something stupidly cheesy. She’ll more than likely think you’re worth her time.”
“Thanks for saying that I have a nice looking face. Stupidly cheesy? Like what exactly?”
I am now, I transferred from Seattle University. Nice to meet you too. Now you wouldn’t happen to know where Washington Hall is, would you?
That’s great. I hope you like it here because I will certainly enjoy seeing you around here. And yeah, I do. It’s this way.
That sounds like a new club that everyone is going to be dying to get into.
Might as well be, if we were all going to be there anyways.
I’m pretty sure I never gave it but I’m Riley. I’m just trying to find my way to Washington Hall.
...Right. It’s nice to meet you, Riley. Washington Hall? You’re a student at UNYC?
“Of course.”
“That’s kind of unfortunate then. And you think so? Wouldn’t you consider it more of a lucky weird? Stranger things have happened.”
“Honestly, it would be a lucky weird. I probably wouldn’t even know what to say if we crossed paths again.”
Depends. Would you rather lose to girl or would you rather hook up with a girl?
I mean, either way, you would get to see what I’m working with.
“So you’re one of those kind of guys…I see.”
“What? Even if the girl broke up with me, I probably didn’t feel bad about it.”
You really think sinners were afraid of hell to begin with?
You’re absolutely right. Maybe Hell 2.0 would be slightly better.
“Shit, dude, you’re smitten.”
“You think so?”
