you killed somebody.ย ย ย these words cannot be effaced by guilt,ย they sit like ash in her mouth,ย turning to a tar-like substance in her gumsย ย (ย gored open, ย sinews of fire ramose in her, ย still ย ).ย ย you are so often nothing but the compounds of your bitterness,ย ย exposed in something threefold;ย ย the gut,ย the rotย &ย the will to live.ย ย one of these does not belong to you,ย anymoreย &ย ย in days to come,ย youโll find the word for grief that isnโt yours but is inexplicably owned by you.ย ย the past is not a placeย &ย yet you continue to live in it,ย as its inequitiesย &ย faith of being something at all,ย a point in time,ย a consumption of you for nothing but greed than necessity of hunger.ย ย she was devouring herselfย &ย simply calling it grief.ย ย the guilt is somewhere else,ย druxy in her sternum.ย
ย โ ย ย โโโย ย !!!! ย โย ย ย ย ย spine heckled gutter deep with the cacophony of anaerectic expenses buckling under the body that flung gracelessly from her bannister.ย ย ย she flinched,ย all instinct.ย ย ย the relatively simple buzz of modern living was cut to discord by the red-suited figure.ย for a moment after his crash,ย with his words warbled in her mind,ย she stares,ย considering the thrum of cacoethes in her diaphragm instinctively taut in defense.ย ย
in truth,ย she hadnโt tried to hide.ย she was still in the same apartment sheโd lived in.ย no alias.ย no lies.ย ย the only thing that made him the first to enter was fear.ย sheโd thought to tell jean,ย answer her phone callsย &ย tell her everything.ย it made her face burn to think of it.ย
โย ย honey,ย youโre no priest.ย who the fuck are you?ย ย โย ย tone dulled with vitriol as she discretely ungloves her malison.ย ย motile,ย ย godโs lioness,ย she raises her hands halfway above her abdomen with palms splayed upย &ย outward to him.ย it felt like humming,ย interference tickling the sparsely scarred palms of her;ย coaxedย &ย crackled like static of the soul.ย ย she was the whole shape of sound.ย whether or not she screamed.ย ย
โย i think i know who you are.ย or at least,ย why youโre here. you guys move quickly.ย ย if youโre here to kill me,ย shall we just get to the trying because iโm not about to beg for mercy or ask for forgiveness.ย โย ย she hoped to fuel this fire of rage with pages from herself,ย ย lachrymoseย &ย defiantย ย (ย ย ย almost a petulance that seemed infantile,ย ย as if to convince herselfย ย ).ย ย ย
ย ย ย ย ย ย โI actually am a priest. I got ordained in sainthood some--ow--years ago.โ Severed ribcage was already growing back together like holy magic, pain gnawing away at the self inflicted wounds that began to mend themselves naturally. The pain never ceased, even in self-restoring hands. โI initially did it for a job, but then I ended up doing it for the robes. I mean have you seen that drip? Dungeon and Dragons Game-masters wish they had those kind of robes! Since when did church-drip become so flashy? Catholics, I tell yaโ.โ Hype fixation was a double edged sword for the man that used his tongue and attention span like the serrated weapon that it was. But half the time, most of the time, it was the inability to stop prattling on.
ย ย ย ย ย ย โYouโre the one with the script here, ace. Cripes--wait, hold up--agh!โ One teensy tantalizing trip of anguish as the last of bones snapped back together, clicking with a final dose of agony as he squabbled to his feet, stumbling over broken pieces of oak. Or, whatever that table was made out of--perhaps, mahogany? โLady, if I was here to off yaโ, youโd be dead already. Why the hell would I make a grand entrance that would give away my location and tactical advantage? This isnโt Hitman.โ Eyes behind whitely slits drove over the position of her hands, palms now bare and presented to him as if they could spark power; the subtlety of her seemed more frightening than a gun to his head.
ย ย ย ย ย โOr... do people just think Iโm that mentally inept now. Has my reputation sunk so low, that Iโm the equivalent of Curly, Larry or Moe?โ Upon deepening into this self introspection, the answer was as clear as day, maybe even clearer then his own polished reflection. Many a caped crusader and masked miscreants had several thesisโ worth of things to say about this agentโs lack of candor, skill, finesse, power, grace, tact, brainpower, sense, basic human faculties--
ย ย ย ย ย โIT WAS A RHETORICAL--fuck this, letโs just speed this up. YOU--!โ After cutting his heavenly decree of utter rage and seemingly manic proportions short, his entire focused was thrust onto the woman in front of him, driving a gloved finger dramatically into the air at where she stood. โ...are in danger. See, you killed someone. We all do, we make mistakes, I forgive you, so does J-man.โ There was a nonchalant halfhearted wave given to aforementionedย โJ-Manโ above, as he stepped out of the shattered woody mess and just ever slightly closer to where that power-house of a rippling soul-tearing force of a woman remained. A mirror of motions arose, gloved palms raised as if to indicate his coming of peace--or surrender. โBut you happen to be... you. ...I donโt know much, but--youโre enough of a blip above the usual array of Superpoweredย ne'er-do-wellโs that the X-Force is a vote or two away from wanting you to be pushing up daisies.โ
ย ย ย ย ย A scarred mind flexed, memories razed through his focus, flashes of Evanโs face burning into his retina; him and Logan having the thousandth shouting match of their time.ย โI donโt kill kids.โย โCut him loose.โ And then, the boy was hugging him. The kind of hug that not even friends gave him, an embrace he had not known since--blank.
ย ย ย ย ย The static faded, reality returned to allow kind blue eyes honing her in--drinking in the fear. It wasnโt shown well, there was more fire and brimstone in her face than anything, a force of chaos thrumming at her fingertips. It was only that he assumed--
ย ย ย ย ย โYou donโt wannaโ die, right?โ
