Cashmere Cawl

Continuing to Live || Careers + Cashmere

"Do absolutely nothing but make jewellery and be the best mommy and wife I could be. But I like Andre’s idea of shoving my success in everyone’s face, my brother is still living off of it even though it happened like six years ago" I rolled my eyes at his refusal to do simple tasks in the first few months of being back home. The sound of the Capitol anthem quietened us and there were only two faces, Nara and Pixel. Well… that was surprising.

"You have no idea how happy this makes me, so now the boy from Three is alone. Do you think Nara killed the girl? That’s freaking impressive"

I frowned at Andre's question. "That's probably not going to happen, but I'd love to live in one of those beautiful houses.. I'd probably never leave it and make it my own safe paradise." I dreamed about it in my head.

Suddenly the anthem played in the arena. I raised my eyes to the sky and looked straight into Mara's eyes. It saddened me to see her up there. She was strong, she was confident, more than me and she died already. The other girl seemed so sweet as well on her picture. My heart sank. God knows I could be next.

Continuing to Live || Careers + Cashmere

Momma Miriam… it had a nice ring to it. Hugo and I with our babies, I’d always wanted four but now I want more and I definitely want a beautiful little girl with blonde hair and green eyes so I could call her Cashmere. I stroked Cashmere’s hair slowly and smiled at the boys, I really was going to miss them if I got out of this alive.

"I’ll be the best damn mother ever. And the day hasn’t ended yet, but they probably do, I wouldn’t think the other tributes are stupid enough to not know that."

I chuckled at Andre's words. Momma Miriam... She would definitely be a good mother. I knew that the first time I met her. I rested my head on her shoulder and smiled at the boys.

"Her kids would be lucky" I replied playing with my fingers under the cover. Tomorrow will be another day and some things would change. I felt it already.

Continuing to Live || Careers + Cashmere

"What meal?" I tilt my head to the side and eat some of the food and drink some of the water and relax for the first time all day. I move Cashmere onto my lap and wrap the blanket around us to make sure she doesn’t get cold, she was so small, it could easily happen.

"I’m going to take first watch okay? You can sleep the whole night, you’ll be safe."

I put my head on Miriam's shoulder and smiled. With the cover around us, our heat was keeping us both warm. The fire was burning now and I managed to keep my eyes off of it and forget about the crackling of the wood. I kissed her cheek and whispered a thank you as I relaxed in her arms finding myself safer than I ever was until now.

"Was there a death today? A ring of a cannon?" I asked fighting my eyelids. I kept looking at the sky expecting the pictures of people to show up again.

Continuing to Live || Careers + Cashmere

"Setting up camp here sounds like the best option, I’ll go back down the mountain to get some wood and then we’ll make a nice fire, eat and then sleep okay? I’ll take first watch" I quickly make my way down the mountain, getting some wood and being careful not touch the funky looking plants before making it back up to my alliance who were eating without me.

"Pigs, you could have at least waited" I said with a jokey tone before pulling out my blanket and wrapping it around me. It looked like there were some caves here one, but they’d been blocked off by rocks, sleeping in one of them wouldn’t have been so bad.

#sorry just woke up from a nap #live #para

As soon as we arrived to our camping point, Gabriel put me down on the floor. I thanked him. I took out the sleeping bad and some food from my bag for them. I watched Miriam going to look for wood and sat down on a rock.

When she came back, I was in the sleeping bag eating some food and drinking some of the water I had filled in this morning. I laughed at Miriam's word before getting back to my food. It felt more alive than when I was alone. I looked up at the sky and the stars. The view here at the top of mountain was much better. It felt almost out of the ordinary. The sky seemed almost faked but perfect. I kept silent and listened to them.

Continuing to Live || Careers + Cashmere

"If you guys are hungry, I still have some of my blackened rabbit and some fish as well because I have a small, delicate stomach. Gabriel has water, I filled up his canteen" we kept climbing higher and the plants around me just didn’t look right. When I was reading up on the poisonous and dangerous flora a common theme was spikes, purple plants, smelly sap and a lot of these plants seemed to fit the description. If my lovely sponsor didn’t want me to die she’d send me lovely food.

I looked over at Cashmere who looked as adorable as ever and ran my fingers through her hair. “Are you alright sweety?"

I woke up slowly from my dream as we were still walking. Gabriel was still carrying me. I almost wanted to tell him I could walk slowly on my own. I'm sure his arms were hurting him at this point.

I felt Miriam's fingers brush through my hair. I looked at her and smiled. "Yes... Shouldn't we have arrived up the mountain by now? It feels like we've been walking forever..." I looked at the sky which was slowly turning darker. Night would fall soon. "I have things in my bag... food and water." I pointed at the bag on Andre's shoulder.

#para #day 3 #live

Continuing to Live || Careers + Cashmere

andre-galin

For the sake of our conversation, it was better if I was stayed quiet. I wanted to protect them, but I also wanted to win. More than anything, that was what I desired all these years. I just wasn’t sure if I could forget about my selfish side.

"Yeah, I like that idea. We need to eat too, make sure we’re ready for what’s to come."

#I thought I would pitch in #since Cleo is getting drunk #para #live #day 3

I nodded to Miriam. Would I keep fighting till the end? If Miriam made me promise, I couldn't say no. My eyes felt so heavy as Gabriel's movement was craddling me. I let go of his neck resting my shoulder for a little bit. His grip was stronger as he promised not to drop me.

I feel asleep and let the sweet dreams of a small blonde girl soothe me. I felt safe. Safe enough to sleep better than I had slept in the arena since we were here. I know nothing would happen to me. I trusted them.

Continuing to Live || Careers + Cashmere

"Well, the people in District Eight are wrong. Fire is bad I agree with you, but only sometimes. If we didn’t have fire, then I wouldn’t be able to make the jewellery that I make back home. There’s a lot of things people are unlucky with and it’ll never be your fault if I did here okay?" she worried so much, people had made her feel so bad, putting a blame on a little girl when they should be looking at their own faults.

"I made sure I was voted in, so if it’s anyone’s fault why I die it’ll be my own because I put myself here"

I listened to her. She talked exactly than my teacher back in district 8. I bit my lip and nodded. "If you die, I'll die too anyway ..." I said with a small smile. If she didn't have the chance to go back, I knew I would certainly have no chance to get out of this alive. I looked at the bloog on my clothes. My blood mixed with Lyra's and Talon's. I concentrated back on Miriam as Gabriel carried me. My shoulder started to remember me what happened the days before. "You'll go home Miriam... You have to." I said worried. "There's no one else I know, no offense to the boys, who deserves it more than you..." I whispered to her as she walked next to Gabriel.

#live #para

Continuing to Live || Careers + Cashmere

So that’s why she was so scared… “I’m sure it wasn’t your fault Cashmere, accidents happen and you’re lucky to be alive" I wiped the tear that ran down her cheek away, I didn’t want her to be sad or to cry for something that wasn’t her fault.

"Don’t blame yourself for something like that okay?" it was bad enough that she lost her mother for her, someone so young to think it was her fault was wrong on so many levels.

I forced a smile on my face and sniffed as I listened to Miriam. I was told this over and over again but why was I here then? The only reason I had been voted off to the Hunger Games was to punish me of my mistake. I wasn't lucky to be alive.

My only hope is that it was over. If I'd return to District 8, I hoped I would be someone else, someone new who didn't deserve to be hated. I looked around and realized I'd probably not see anything else than this arena for the rest of my life. "I don't want to blame myself." I spoke slowly. "It's just how it has been all of my life." I sighed and looked around at the black trees. "Fire is bad... I'm unlucky with fire. What if it's my fault if you die here?" I shook my head scared.

#para #live #day 3

Continuing to Live || Careers + Cashmere

"Yesterday there was a fire in the forest when we had a fight, we ran out of the forest towards the lake where you were, but we need to go through it again, I’m sorry if it makes you sad Cashmere." it hurt me to see her like this so I started to pick up the pace so we could get to the healthy part of the forest as quickly as we can.

"What accident Cashmere? You can talk to me you know"

I frowned. Why would the GMs put the forest on fire? I shuddered in Gabriel's arm as we kept moving. I hoped that I could stay away from any flame for the rest of my time. "My mother died in a house fire... It was my fault." I spoke with a soft voice and looked up at Gabriel and Andre. A tear dropped on my cheek. "The house just took fire so fast, I had barely the time to go out...."

#para #live #day 3

Continuing to Live || Careers + Cashmere

She looked so scared as she tightened her grip around Gabriel’s neck and I put my hand on her shoulder gently to reassure her that she was okay.

"It’s okay, don’t worry, the fire is all gone now we’re not walking into a burning wood so you’re fine. Do you not like fire Cashmere?" It seemed as though we’d created quite the blaze, the only alive trees I could see were quite a way away.

"We’re not going to be here for long, we’re going to climb the mountain some more okay?"

I felt Miriam's hand on my shoulder and opened my eyes to look into hers. I nodded. "I just..." My eyes swept the woods around us. My nose smelled the burned wood. I concentrated back on her and shook my head. "I haven't been near fire since the accident." I whispered as I tightened my grip on Gabriel's. I looked in the same way than she did and saw the healthy trees far away. "Okay..." I said uneasily. "Are you sure it's not on fire? Why is it burned?" I asked. Everything was black and dead.