The Beginning of the End @ Cronkite
The start of my final year at Arizona State University as an undergraduate will begin this fall.
On May 29, it will have been 10 years since I moved from Santa Ana to Phoenix, and it has been 15 years since I graduated high school. It’s been a long trek with many twists, turns, setbacks, slumps, heartbreaks, emptiness and triumphs, but I’m finally going to finish university. I’ve changed from an arrogant, lost, unmotivated fool who took the “live in the now” adage to heart, to become a (mostly) responsible, thoughtful adult who was crushed by the real world only to grow stronger like a Sayan.
No More Pell Grant, What About Summer? 😭
My final year was going to be financially rough because I maxed out on the Pell Grant. I was awarded the full amount but, instead, received about 30% paid only to the fall semester.
I was worried. I had set aside $1000 from my tax refund for summer tuition, which came out to be $800 more than expected and had to dip into my savings. I wanted to finish some requirements and do an internship, but a decision was put to me: Do I use my return for summer or spring?
I still have a part-time job, I thought. I figured that I would have to save $200 a month starting May just to cover spring tuition. That doesn’t seem like much to someone who works 40 hours a week, but I work part-time, limited to 25 hours a week at my campus job. Get a second job, you say? Ah, yes. The old “well you need to work harder” nonsense spoken by people who don’t know me or my life nor anyone’s life but their own, who are far removed from what it was like––if it was ever the case––when they were young and paid tuition that was 1000x lower than today. But I digress. That’s a rant for another time.
So I decided to take summer courses and an unpaid, 12 hour a week internship. I planned to work the max at my job, save the money, and hope to avoid any large expenses before the spring.
Now, why did I decide to do this? It’s a fair question. It may seem stupid to some, but that would be from a short-sighted viewpoint. When applying for a job, the more impressive the resume and portfolio, the better the chances of getting the job. The more demanding the job requires of you, the more pay you will get. So showing that I am able to handle the job competently would only make me the suitable candidate for the job and hence deserving of the pay. Beating out the the one who viewed my decision as stupid.
I Got Me A Scholarship! 🤑
About one and a half weeks ago, I was told I was awarded a scholarship from my college for $2000.
It’s the largest scholarship amount I’ve ever been awarded, it’s also the second scholarship I’ve ever received.
The award solved my tuition problem.
My heart was lighter when I read the e-mail, my shoulders unburdened and my credit union account... still the same, for now. I somehow felt more attached to the college as I read the letter. I can’t explain it.
I’ve never been one for ceremony, but I’m looking forward to walking next year in a cap and gown sharing a moment with my graduating class.
There is something more significant about graduating from university than say a community college––having graduated from one myself.
Ceremonies mark an end, a beginning or a milestone. They create a moment that one would always remember by creating an excitement that happens rarely. It’s not everyday that I graduate from university nor is it every year. I’m an undergraduate only once. I’ve worked hard these past five years, taking on challenges not because I had to but because I wanted to.
Not everybody graduates from university and few even go or get to go for various reasons (i.e. cost, opportunity, work, family, or just plain not ready). I dropped out after two years from a CC back home to work. I always regretted it, but upon retrospect it was good that I had to drop out to work because I wasn’t ready for college. I was getting C’s and B’s, I put hardly any effort in learning and so I was wasting my time and Pell Grant.
My path to university was non-traditional. I needed to take a break from academics, experience life and find out who I was.
So walking would not just be dressing up, listening to a couple of speeches, receiving a piece of paper and metal; it’ll be a culmination of the past 15 years infused into a single moment.
If you asked me about walking 15 years ago, I would have said something much different. But I was a damned fool who had no life experience and hence did not possess any wisdom. When I hear the same thoughts I had expressed by the younger students, my heart hurts because I can’t do anything that would immediately change their attitude. They have to go through the same thing I went through and hopefully they will gain some wisdom on the way.
titsay
prguitarman
gracieabrams
baratheonpilled
turnnoffyourmind
theartofmadeline
