4h
Genuinely curious: how do onions (raw) taste to all of you? Kinda trying to find out if i maaaaybe have a little allergy to them...
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Genuinely curious: how do onions (raw) taste to all of you? Kinda trying to find out if i maaaaybe have a little allergy to them...
I’m having a lot of fun going through the process of figuring out what is actually sensory issues or if I’m just allergic to things. Sunscreen is a rare both. Chapstick isn’t supposed to be spicy apparently. Wild times.
RELEASE ME FROM THE FOUL CLUTCHES OF THESE DAMNED ALLERGIES. THE SINUS INFLAMMATION HAS LAID SIEGE UPON MY TEAR DUCTS. CLARITIN BE WITH YE
Sneaky Kink | Off C/ampus- GG/HW, allergies
This is something I just threw together over the past few days after having many discussions with @themiseryandcompany about H/annah having a sneeze kink. This is (obviously) my first time writing for this fandom, so I hope their voices are decent enough. I’ve watched the show almost three full times through, so it’s going to be embarrassing if it’s not accurate lol. The sneeze spellings in this are literally just pulled from @themiseryandcompany’s headcanon list. I will actually form my own sneeze spellings soon, but my brain cannot function right now and their headcanons are perfect. So here it is…
———
This man was going to be the death of her.
On top of being gorgeous, funny, and one of the kindest people she’d ever met, Garrett Graham had allergies. Not just any allergies — devastating fall allergies that made her stutter and squirm in his presence.
Every time he rubbed at his pinkening nose or sniffled, god forbid sneezed, she had to look away in fear of giving away every desire that lived inside her dirty mind. And when he did sneeze, these rough, masculine bursts of spray that could be heard from several feet away, she bit her tongue to keep from asking him to fuck her right then and there.
It wasn’t pretty, but she’d managed to keep her secret hidden from him so far. The only person who even knew about the kink was Allie, and Hannah had sworn her to secrecy (even though Allie did give her some looks occasionally when Garrett sneezed particularly intensely).
She’d be fine.
No one would find out, and Hannah would continue babbling like an idiot every time she tried offering a blessing to her boyfriend.
Only…
She hadn’t noticed that Garrett sensed a difference in her behavior when he was afflicted by his allergies.
He couldn’t identify exactly what was going on, but it was clear that Hannah went from calm and confident to anxious in a matter of seconds when his symptoms acted up.
It was noticeable enough that he was determined to find the root cause of her behavior…
——
Hannah had just woken up from a mid-day nap, finding herself wrapped in Garrett’s strong arms and held against his bare chest. It was one of her favorite places to be, and made her feel nothing but safe. Except for the times when he…
Garrett’s breath caught, once, twice, before he inhaled sharply. His chest swelled with the intake of air, readying for the imminent explosion.
He’s really going to— Hannah’s thoughts were interrupted by her boyfriend sneezing twice haphazardly over her shoulder.
“—EH’DZSSCHoo! hH-? H’JYSSSZCHHoo!”
The bed shook with the expulsions, and all Hannah could do was lie there and replay the feeling of his chest against her back, expanding and contracting with the huge sneezes; listening to the sound echo in the silence of the room, and watching the (rarely uncovered) spray almost sparkle in the afternoon sun.
Fuck, she had just woken up and she was already horny.
Hannah tilted her head upwards towards Garrett’s still peacefully sleeping face and made a split second decision. Was it a smart one? Absolutely not. But she had never known the horny version of herself to be smart — not like every other version of herself.
She was going to relieve herself. Right here, in bed, wrapped in Garrett’s arms, before he woke up.
This was a dangerous game, but she couldn’t lie and say it didn’t excite her. There was no way that Garrett would know it was related to his sneezes. He was probably barely even conscious when they happened, so she’d be in the clear. And then when he woke up? She’d either be finished and sated, or he’d find her in the middle and join in, blissfully unaware of the cause.
It seemed like a great plan to her.
She shifted herself so that her back wasn’t completely against Garrett’s chest, but spread more evenly between his bare skin and the soft sheets on the mattress. Step two was in motion: move her right arm ever-so-slightly from Garrett’s grip and slide it down her shorts and into her lacy panties. Step three: find the already throbbing center of sexual nerves and rub her fingers over it, using friction in her favor to build tension.
The plan was well into motion within a minute. Hannah replayed the sounds and images over and over again in her mind, increasing her speed with each repetition.
She was going to come soon, and hard. Harder than she had in a while.
Just as she was inching closer and closer to her orgasm, Garrett shifted behind her.
“W-What are you doing?” He asked, clearing his throat.
Hannah stilled.
“Are you touching yourself without me?” His voice was deep and husky in the way that drove Hannah wild.
“I wasn’t…” she could feel the blush rising to her cheeks.
“Baby, you don’t have to be embarrassed.” Garrett slid his hand down to the waistband of Hannah’s shorts. “I love when you touch yourself.”
A shiver ran through Hannah’s body.
“But I love it even more when you let me help you.” He grazed his nose against Hannah’s cheek, slipping his hand into her panties at the same time.
She whimpered, removing her fingers from her clit so Garrett could take over.
“You’re so good for me. S-so sweeh…” he trailed off, breath catching once again.
Oh fuck. Oh fuck. Oh fuck. He was going to sneeze while his hand was on her fucking clit.
She was done. A goner.
Might as well dig her grave now and write on the tombstone ‘died at the hands of a sneezing kink.’
Garrett continued stroking her even as his breath caught high in his throat. Within seconds he was twisting away from Hannah, sneezing three times into his shoulder. The rocking motion caused his fingers to press into Hannah’s clit, and the pressure along with the sneezes made her orgasm rip through her.
Hannah moaned loudly through the entire orgasm, only stopping once she was completely exhausted and boneless.
Garrett sniffled, chuckling at the display. “Sorry, baby. That snuck up on me. But it seems like you didn’t mind it that much, hm?”
Hannah’s eyes widened, all exhaustion replaced by anxiety. “I… I didn’t…” she stammered.
“No, no, Wellsy, it’s okay.” He assured her. “I’m not bothered by it.”
“By…?”
“I think you know.” Garrett murmured.
Hannah sighed. “It’s just… gross.”
“No, it’s not. I think it’s pretty cute.” He pressed his lips to her temple.
“But—” She was going to say how disgusting it was to be into something like sneezing. Something where the body reacted to an irritant so violently that it sometimes repeatedly expulged air, saliva, and mucus from the nose and mouth to get rid of it. Somehow her brain had gotten mis-wired, and she found this bodily function hot of all things.
“I love you. No matter what, or how disgusting you think you may be.”
“Are you sure?”
“You’re stuck with me.” Garrett chuckled. “Now I think I might have to sneeze again if you wanna…”
He was too fucking much.
It's kinda bs some foods can have a bad effect on your body but be delicious
Why DID you decide to have eggs upset my stomach but then you decided deviled eggs were delicious? Just make them taste like shit its that easy
Dear allergy having people of tumblr I am having a new friend over tomorrow who has a pork allergy and I need to decontaminate my kitchen.
What I have read is alcohol based wipes with multiple passes with multiple wipes works very well but I need to be double dumbass sure.
I cook with stainless steel, which I run through the dish washer on hot after a pre-wash bc I am of the opinion that flecks of food in my glasses is gross and no matter what the internet says I will not just "scrap and put it in."
I am currently deep cleaning my oven with oven-off. I have riped apart the stove top and hand washed it all with hot water, dawn dish soap and a fresh sponge.
I'll be wiping down every exposed surface with clorox wipes unless there is something else that is better?
And I'll be cleaning the refrigerator maybe with simple green?
I don't have the number of the new friend yet otherwise I'd ask their preferences. Their the new S.O. of an older friend. So really truly any advice is welcomed. I don't wanna accidentally kill someone
The appliance delivery guys have come and gone which is great but I was definitely allergic to one of their colognes and I can't stop sneezing god help me
