things ive heard people say in class:
“what if i just straight up break down in class and scare the shit out of ms neo so that she’ll postpone the test?”
“is it too early if i have a breakdown in january?” “its the second week, man.” “i know.”
“let’s all just collectively skip the national exams, fuck the system!” *aggressive cheering*
in a really choked up voice, “i have rights.”
“what if i become a monk? do monks have to take exams?”
“in this context, what does ‘rapid’ mean?” “FAST AND FURIOUS”
“did y’all do the chem homework?” *collective ‘no’s* “alright, good. nobody be a wimp and do their homework, alright? if we’re fucked, we’re all fucked together.”
“wait, you mean to say that this school still teach fun stuff like music??”
*scandalised gasp* “you stole my circle template’s virginity!” “all i did was hook a finger through one of the holes!” “exactly!”
“i bought this $2 knee guard just because i want to pretend that i’m injured so that i can sit out of PE.” [slides knee guard on] “i have three consecutive tests after this and lord knows i need all the extra study time that i can get.”
in an increasingly panicked voice, “i can’t just do my lit homework in 30mins!” “well, i did.” “what did you put for characterisation and further analysis?” “i said the protagonist was a fuckboy, and then proceeded to write 3 paragraphs and a conclusion consisting of utter bullshit on why he’s a fuckboy.”
“don’t they call people from Germany, germanese?” said by a top student.
“i think i’m a hermaphrodite.”
“fuck, i hate this. can i just be an escort? or have like 67 sugar daddies?”
in the middle of physics class: “i’m leaving, i’m fucking leaving. i’m going down to the canteen to buy takeouts of 3 fishball noodles. y’all want anything?”
“i want the saddest pepe the frog meme you can find as our class logo.”
“i found a salsa dip in my bag, anyone have some chips?” [a girl sighs, puts down her calculator and reaches into her sports bag] “i do.”
I know I reblogged this before but I wanted to reblog with a few of my own
“Is the Holocaust still going on?”
“Paris is a COUNTRY. It’s in the COUNTRY.”
When asked for his math homework: “You see, what happened sir was, I forgot to give a fuck about this class.”
“I’m so upset I got a B.” Followed by the entire class, in unison: “Shut up, Sierra.”
“Are you preparing for the presentation?” “Yeah, about that, could you break my arm really quick? I’ll get out of gym class AND the presentation. It’s a win-win, really.”
“I seemed to have misspelled something on the board.” On the board is written: What that’s each food group does? “I can’t believe I am certified to be a teacher.”
“Fuck you and this class.” He proceeds to pick up a zucchini, bite into it, spit it into the sink, rinse his mouth with Dawn soap, spit THAT into the sink, and sits back down. “Sorry, I just realized I can’t get another detention. Carry on.”
To a pregnant teacher: “Stop it. Sit down. I will do it. You are with child.”
Some from my school:
• *loud and horrific screaming coming from another room* my teacher, with a wink and a smile: “torture”
• “is the moon a country?” (said during history class)
• “is the sun alive?” (Said during science)
• “if someone else taking a different test in the same room that we’re taking a test dies, do we still all get an A?”
• “you know, I think I should write my college essay about how dinosaurs arent real”
• in math class: “there’s nothing inherently wrong with incest”
• student: “hey can you actually go over this topic” my teacher: “hey can you actually shut up”
• my teacher looks dismally down at his notecard “i dont even know half of this stuff”
At my school:
● "Why is the room so damn hot?" "Because our class is hell."
