Family Planning pt. 2 || Pregnancy & Birth
TW: Obvious warning for medical, blood, vomit, etc. I have not included any poor outcome type prompts in this so that anyone that doesn’t prefer the darker, angsty routes can skip. If that’s something people want to see, let me know. Be sure to specify in the tags if you’re looking to avoid certain prompts, lovelies! Obviously feel free to adjust them as needed to suit your needs 💜 💜 💜
“If I have to go clothes shopping one more time, I’m going to just move to a nudist colony.”
“Wait- that didn’t make you feel sick? Are you starting to feel better?”
“When did you want to start telling everyone else?”
“No, no, if we don’t tell my mom before friends and coworkers, I will never hear the end of it till I’m dead.”
“Just so you know, if I end up in jail, it’s because one more person I don’t know touched my stomach.”
“So pregnancy brain is apparently actually a thing. I left my phone in the refrigerator and couldn’t find it for hours.”
“I’m sorry, could you repeat that? I seem to have misheard you, I could have sworn you said ‘there’s more than one in there’…”
“Oh. Oh no. No way. That is a name that says ‘Hi, my parents hated me and wanted me to be bullied, would you like to give me a wedgie?’“
“Have you felt any movement yet?”
“I don’t know if I’m feeling movement? It might just be gas from my stomach being messed up all the time.”
“I think I’m finally showing? Tell me I’m showing!”
“Is this a trick request? Are you going to then get mad at me for implying you’re showing?”
“I can’t reach my feet to put on my shoes. Being pregnant sucks.”
“Sleep now while you can, they say. What sleep? How is anyone sleeping with this much activity going on inside them?”
“Pass me those headphones you don’t use anymore. I’m cranking up Mozart and this kid is going to sleep so help me.”
“Did you get any sleep at all last night? Seemed like you did nothing but get up for the bathroom.”
“Remind me again why I said I wanted kids? Because I forgot.”
“Remember how I said I wanted nothing to do with sex? Yeah, well, hormones say otherwise now. The complete opposite, in fact. When are you getting home?”
“I’m not going to hurt you or the baby?”
“You are worth spoiling, and it’s not even spoiling, it’s just me helping my partner while they’re pregnant.”
“No, that’s a hideous nursery color. We will see enough of that color elsewhere.”
“I didn’t know having a baby in a hospital cost so much, holy shit.”
“See, this is why we should have moved to Europe, better parental leave and healthcare.”
“This isn’t the movies, your water doesn’t break in a bucket load.”
“You’re making a face, baby good?”
“It’s just false contractions, I’m fine. Promise.”
“Oh no, I don’t do genital reveal parties, that’s just…so weird.”
“You look stunning, I promise. Pregnancy glow is not a myth.”
“Why is there a Switch in the go-bag?”
“So my parents wanted to be in the delivery room…”
“Absolutely not. Your mom is not getting to know me that well.”
“You will manage just fine. You’re not the world’s first single parent.”
“So that was definitely a contraction.”
“I’ll time them. You want me to get you anything?”
“I get you’re not jumped up to leave, but if we don’t, I feel like you’re going to end up having the baby in the car on the freeway.”
“You don’t have to stick to the plan, you know. It’s okay to say you want the pain relief. Either way, I’m here.”
“I’m good, I’m Gucci, I- oh my god I want drugs! Now!”
“My hand can take it, promise.”
“Those cries- it feels like that was an eternity.”
“They have your eyes already, I’m in trouble.”
“Nine pounds? No wonder it took so long!”
“Is it normal for babies to be this bald?”
“I needed you at the appointment. They- there- there wasn’t a heartbeat on
"I told you so. Look at this tiny person, you did it!”
“No, please, you hold them. I feel shakier than a leaf.”
“I could pick that face out of a hundred babies if I needed to. I’ve only been staring at it in awe for the past three hours.”
“I did not know one that small could be that loud!”
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