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@ccdralhashimi
Al-Hashimi's cry in the car was so fucking relatable to anyone who has a chronic illness that feels like they're being barred from doing what they want because of something that they had no choice or control over.
thinking about the fact that baran al-hashimi has had life-long complications in the aftermath of viral meningitis since she was five years old. thinking about the fact that she likely did not have a "normal" childhood. thinking about the fact that she's become a doctor, done life-saving work abroad, seen human atrocities firsthand bc of her work with the MSF, learned multiple languages, mentored Mel and Samira, tried to be a good and empathetic doctor wherever possible. as much as i critique her for the AI thing, Baran clearly thinks its a good, albeit imperfect tool that will help minimize the hours she and those around her have to spend at work after their shifts and that impulse, however ethically flawed and worthy of critique, is motivated by Baran's genuine desire to return home to her child and have as much time with her family as she possibly can. because the reality is that her time as a self-sufficient, able-bodied professional, parent, and woman is finite. her condition isn't going to get better. it's not going away. the (implied) rapid uptick in her absent seizures is a sign that things are likely getting much, much worse in a way that is (most likely) not entirely reversible, if at all. i think about her calling her neurologist in the bathroom and not yet hearing back from them. i think about her teary eyes as she shares her chart with Robby. i think about her butting heads with him all shift but still being able to recognize and vocalize that she appreciates his medical advocacy (however unconventional his delivery may be lol) and trusts his professional opinion. my goodness. what a heartbreaker.
okay i don't want to be too mean so i'll put it this way:
dear the pitt fans,
i wish for you whatever you have wished on robby robinavitch or trinity santos :)
no, al-hashimi is not being a bitch or hates addicts for letting the med students speak and not letting langdon(senior resident who is supposed to be teaching) take over. she is using the context she finally has to protect the younger people around her from abuse of power, something robby hasn't bothered to do for even one second
Baran going "wHAT" when Robby just casually drops that bomb like oh my god girl you have been so severely fucked over I'm so fucking sorry đđđ you were not given even close to a fighting chance you walked in on a burning fucking building. whole place burnt the fuck out, "community" almost non-existent, and the attending you're replacing is prolly going to kill himself and never come back!
and he's still pissed at you for replacing him because he's got severe mental issues and even though you have no part in that your very existence makes him feel like he's never been needed! and at the same time he's still fucking flirting because he's a total slut with a fat crush on you! (even though you most definitely kiss girls) yeah. um. good luck?
Watching the scene where Al-Hashimi cradles Brenda's face and smooths her hair makes me wonder if anyone did that for her. If there was a moment during her time overseasâwhen she frantically tried to put everyone back together, to save more children and mothers than was possibleâwhere she felt like giving up. Did another doctor with kind, sure hands pull her out of a road, call her name, tell her it will be alright, that she'd get through the other side of the grief threatening to choke her? Did they bring her inside and let her cry, give her a moment of kindness and respite in the middle of a mass grave?
Al-Hashimi sees doctors and patients alike on their worst days, in their loneliest, coldest, most human moments, and meets them with nothing but unflinching compassion, with an understanding that might be frightening to people who are unused to being seen so openly. Who did that for her? Who does it for her now?
Actually finished one of my master's projects because that shit was less stressful than the new Pitt episode -- not sure I've ever used postgrad work to calm myself down before đđ
"People don't always respond to trauma the way you expect them to." And I need people to listen to him. I do not care if you like him or not. I do not care if you want to hang him or not. I need you all to take a fucking second to listen to what he's saying. To take a minute to internalize what the show keeps fucking trying to tell.
"Santos"
I think it's really cool how Al-Hashimi takes her cues from Langdon on how to deal with Santos not following his instructions. Garcia steps in and tells her to cut it out because she knows all about what's going on, but Al-Hashimi doesn't. She knows Langdon's just come back to work and that they're not getting along for some reason, but beyond supporting Langdon's movesâ because they're the right onesâ she mostly stands back and let's it play out because it's what Langdon's doing. It's great, because she clearly realizes there's more going on, but she also knows she lacks information, so she takes her cues from the parties involved and tries to keep everyone on task without upsetting anyone too much.
the concept of al-hashimi having to perform a flawless slash trake, take everyoneâs ridicule with a smile on her face, and protect all of the women and specifically woc around her without being unlikeable or confrontational in order for some of the audience to be like âwait is al-hashimi maybe not an irredeemable cunt???â while ogilvie has one episode where he doesnât antagonize a woc coworker or say something horrifically and intentionally insensitive and iâve seen so many ppl acting like âOMG I LOVE HIM WAITTTT HEâS SUCH A GREAT CHARACTER OMG I LOVE HIM!!!â puh lease đđđ
Btw if Robby had taken the time to properly brief Al Hashimi on the situation with Langdon and Santos I very much doubt sheâd put them in a case together on his first day back but noooo he couldnât be bothered to discuss the ER with her like she asked. Multiple times.
TW: Suicide, suicidal ideation, plans of suicide, Robby's situation as a whole
There are a lot of really great and intense moments in S2x10. But, I think one of the biggest but much more subtle moments of storytelling about Robbyâs state is this:
It tells us that Robby has taken up this motorbike four months after season 1. That this is an active decision made after weâve clearly seen him in an unwell and suicidal place.Â
It solidifies that Robbyâs not taken up repairing this motorbike as a midlife crisis or for the love of the game, but rather in the hopes itâll give him a fast death heâs not in control of. He has worked in the ED for seemingly forever; he has seen countless motorbike deaths, countless riders who were already dead before they could even get them into the trauma room, and countless sad tales of wrong place, wrong time.Â
But for a man who wants to take his own life, itâs the perfect story, the perfect solution. He doesnât have to step off the ledge if itâs done for him. If another car hits him while heâs on his motorbike, itâs not a choice heâs made; he is just in the wrong place at the wrong time. Itâs a tragic story, but one that maybe will be easier for his friends and colleagues to digest than if Robby stepped off the literal ledge on top of PTMC.Â
There is also no one there to talk him down off the metaphorical ledge. No Abbot to convince him not to do it, because what would Abbot say? Don't ride motorbikes, they're dangerous? Maybe he thinks the bike is good for Robby, heâs got a new hobby, theyâve spent time fixing it together, and now Robby has another friend in Duke the motorbike engineer. Abbot, of course, would know the risks of motorbikes, but who is he to judge? He might be in therapy, but heâs still taking voluntary positions with SWAT as their medic, and itâs just a tragic story if he gets caught in the crossfire.
This is a very informed choice, a choice informed by all those tragic tales, all the motorbike patients who never even had a chance, especially the ones without helmets. Robby takes that PennDot motorcycle safety course not because he cares about safety, quite the opposite. It gives him the legal right to ride without a helmet in Pennsylvania, so he can increase the risk of his death, and a very instant one, upon crashing. So that when he does get hit, he has a higher chance of a brain injury if his brain isnât already splattered across the road, which is probably his ideal scenario. The scenario where he doesnât get brought into the Pitt, where heâs declared dead at the scene, and his colleagues donât have to see him. They will just have to pass his picture on the wall next to Dr Adamson, where Robby can rest, and if they hear about him not wearing a helmet when he got hit, well, he mustâve just forgotten that day because he was always carrying one when he walked into work.Â
But it hasnât worked. Heâs been riding for 6 months in and out of work, even after long 12-hour shifts, and nothing has happened. So, heâll book that sabbatical, a very extended one that requires pre-planning and making sure he has a âtemporaryâ replacement. Then, when all his affairs are in order, when heâs said his goodbyes, when heâs burnt enough bridges that the group of people that will grieve him has shrunk, heâll start a very long trip, after a very long shift, and keep driving till it happens. Till heâs another tragic tale, another remembrance, another memory, another colleague, another friend, another mentor laid to rest.
baran al-hashimi + textposts
Form by @/theoceanblooms on Twitter for some fans to fill outâŠ
idk ig just smth about al-hashimi snapping back at garcia like that (after performing a 'robby' cowboy procedure), because yes she saved the patients life, kinda highlights that the toxic banter robby has helped foster in the pitt is not just harmless fun but actually has an effect on the respect these doctors have for eachother and impacts patient care
maybe if the hospital had a more professional relationship with the ER maybe that sepsis patient wouldn't have neglected by surgery and ended up losing her leg because they 1. refused to consult in a timely manner 2. send someone competent instead of a student/intern to take pictures and 3. were still planning on disregarding until robby did a malpractice because they dont take the ER or their concerns seriously until theyre forced to
like call me crazy but gracia calling robby robinabitch (however deserved) was wildly unprofessional and trying to belittle or somehow reprimanded al-hashimi for giving that kid a fight chance to be saved was insane
I think robby seeing her in the light of 'she cant take a joke' when in reality her asking for there to be a level of respect is part of her wanting to reform the ER for better in what should be their priority of saving lives instead of something to do instead of go to therapy