Better than Daylight🌙

22 he/him Ojibwe I like writing poetry

[ceadgearst]

my thoughts are not a lot but they've got passion when they're crashing all together forever is never a finite point when you joint yourself to weather anything you don't bring yourself to any conclusion in confusion you're losing

[ceadgearst]

death and decay are apparent

transparent share it tear it apart

struggle with the part

where it starts to appear on you

what do you do

struggle against symbiosis there are no real choices just the noises that you make when you feel your earth shake and tumble while you fumble crumble into the dark a stark contrast life and death the appearance of melancholy when you take your last breathe what's left to you to do when it's not your day anymore

I hope I can read the newspaper

See the news of later

admire earth from the aether

hear the daily weather

whether or not I could interact with it directly

I want to see what the world will be

without me

when it happens eventually

[ceadgearst]

I feel like I judge people too often

I've forgotten how to trust a stranger

cause in my head I always read danger

jesus born in bethlehem in a meager manger

[ceadgearst]

I'm sitting outside the library

therapy

there to be the only place

I can quit this race

slow my pace

and taste the air there

where they do not care if I have money

[ceadgearst]

As the sun spins and spirals

the entitled grow wild

mild is the days of the past

before everything did collapse

in a lapse or relapse of better judgement

I am above something, stumbling,

crumbling like a cookie in water

it gets hotter the more you move

to find your groove is to prove a point

[ceadgearst]

George RR Martin is absolutely shit

[ceadgearst]

The past will always be behind you

Your future will always be ahead

In the present, instead of worry

Ask yourself

What's the hurry?

[ceadgearst]

People in places of power are predators

There's nothing left there of prey

They think you should do as they say cause hey

who else do you play?

You can never have a balanced relationship with someone famous

it's the lamest truth

Soothe your says and weighs out your options

(he got money, a lot of them)

And 10 out of 10 times he's fine with sweeping things under the rug, because he's a manufactured thug with a slug in his heart and brain

Do you think anyone sane could sustain that lifestyle? The piles of cash replace the weight that was once his soul but he can never fill up that hole so that's why he stole your heart because his art depends on a struggle to start but where's that part when he's no longer scraping money together at walmart

where does it start when you run out of art

Part-ys and ladies and Mercedes will send you to Hades the pleiades will show you no mercy

for what hurts me is what makes you lonely if only you could see clearer the fear is what drives you the fear is what lies to you

try to be true but what do you do when no one relates to you boo hoo wipe those tears with your hundreds you bled for this didn't you

And you didn't see things through you just saw what you wanted to and developmentally that stunted you and now you will do what you always wanted to do because that's just you

You never worked on yourself you only worked on what drives you so who the fuck really are you who the fuck is really true

[ceadgearst]

I was abandoned

By the sun the moon the tomb I built was made of stilt and straw with a deathly maw and a scrape like a caw the raw emotion the raw feeling it is like your skin peeling and crusting over over and over again you pick at your skin like you mean to dig in

[ceadgearst]

Positions of power sour good intentions

[ceadgearst]

My friend always tells me I write like Charles bukowski, as if I could see that clearly, or write that dearly, or peer so fearlessly down a beer bottle, or I could live my life so carelessly at full throttle but like a bottle of liquor it's quicker to chug it all at once than to nurse it over the night sky. I don't like to try all that hard because life is a deck of a single card and I'm never really sure which one it is It could be a piss poor card or a hard bargain I just never know when to begin but back on the topic I have had about lost it with this comparison to spectres flying like comets their vomit could not compare to my air my hair what I wear and what I care about it is all doubt imposter syndrome with a drum beat that heats up your palms this writing was your daily alms

[ceadgearst]

I saw the world in your eyes

The way they glides over to me and only to hold my eyes in surprise like I never surmised your eyes has a grip like a fist flies right towards your eyes, and they roll back and you catch a last glimpse of the sky

my

[ceadgearst]

Who could stay where I have stayed who could have prayed where I have prayed who could've saved their life like I own did could you do it could you do it better could you change the world over and over could you kick the habit and get sober could you survive to another October I told her over and over honey I am a clover cigarette that numbs your lips and catches your breathe when there's about half of me left take a breathe and exhale stale smoke as I soak in the sun done with everything and nothing procrastinating and lacerating exaggerating everything everywhere everywhere everything everywhere everything is too everything everywhere everything everywhere is too loud

[ceadgearst]

Im not seeking answers I'm seeking questions

Neglect is infection, reflection is perfection

which direction do you point your bow

Do you know

Where to go

Before it begins to snow?

how so have you survived this long out here

Suffering, stumbling, mumbling and fumbling every chance life has ever given you

Just because you believe the opportunities presented to you are just too good to be true

You protect yourself

but protection is misdirection of aggression or affection or attention or addiction

what you're kicking is what you're missing

Wishing (u) wel

[ceadgearst]

How far away we are from stars, from cars, from the local piss smelling bars mars is a faint dot like a red rot like a pimple on the universe's face when I see space I wish I could associate it with a taste like metal burning in my mouth or the feeling of heading down south and smelling the air I don't care where when or how just allow me this jealousy to grow into something temporary

[ceadgearst]

Angels all mangled with their chicken bones and thrones of gold dancing over their head

is an angel ever dead instead led down somewhere new an unfamiliar avenue

what is true is up to you so do what you do just remember what you chose to be true

[ceadgearst]

Stars crust over like sobriety torture

the moisture gathers around my eyes, my nose, my features the puncture is worth the pincture I'm sure everything is just a blur a girl a girl my girl holding roses like biblical poetic poses do you notice illusion do you notice confusion do you notice obtrusion like when something's blocking the sun?

I'm done here, now is time it begun