Cephalopod Celabrator

Pfp made by @haematicartwork, banner made by @green-geist Haiii :3. she/they/it, adult, trigender and aro, quite nerdy with an interest in mythology, biology, cephalopods, narrative theory, and fantasy books. Also my most popular posts are about discworld and Terry Pratchett so I guess I'm a fan account for that now. Not complaining.

[theonion]

Apologizing to his tenant for circumstances that were beyond his control, local landlord Eddie Turley was reportedly forced Monday to raise the rent due to thinking of a bigger number. “You can re-sign your lease, but I have to raise it by $250 a month because I realized there was a bigger number your rent could be,” Turley informed his tenant of six years, attributing the rent increase to a need to keep up with the rising numbers he could envision.

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[monidoll]

going by the tadc reaction, when ralsei comes out the fans will all pivot to Evil Ralsei Theory probably

[tirami-tzu]

Ralsei will abruptly start being referred to as a top

[dragongirlsnout]

[youtendtoforget-deactivated2025]

I’m ready to be transformed by the ibuprofen . I’m ready to be born again in its purifying light.

[389]

[stantler]

[fairycosmos]

the issue with growing up in the 2000s and 2010s was like there was this really big push toward "accepting your weirdness" overall but they meant like idk wearing mismatched socks or something not being tangibly beyond the norm in any way shape or form

[springbreak1984]

[blondebrainpowered]

Mouse Armor by Jeff De Boer

[alighted-willow]

I love his stated intention behind these projects, ‘Confuse historians’.

[mousegirlheart]

[neovagi]

Trans women can never win when it comes to our bodies. if we are repulsed by our sex organs, they call us fetishists and imitators. if we are okay with our sex organs, they say it's proof that we're liars and invaders. if we are somewhere inbetween, they will say it's all of the above.

[tankie-transfeminist]

interestingly it's the same tactic of using contradictory standards that is employed against cis women.

This is transfeminism!

[red-garden]

“Do dishes” and “take out trash” both require the use of a spell slot, vs “use phone” is a cantrip, and brother, I am a level one wizard

[imathers]

[gostaks]

on Planet Where Everyone Can Teleport the first person on the moon went there by accident and promptly died. The next dozen or so people also went by accident, and also died. Number 14 figured out that people who go to the moon die and very cleverly brought a sword and six weeks of travel rations. This did not help.

No one on Planet Where Everyone Can Teleport ever figured out why people die in space because they don’t need airplanes and never found it particularly interesting to climb tall mountains. Astronomers use telescopes to take pictures of the ever-growing pile of corpses on the moon.

[btc-official-deactivated2024071]

“why don’t they teleport back” because they’re not on the planet where everyone can teleport anymore. try to keep up dumbass

[retroactivebakeries]

#this feels like a fable that would have some kind of moral but I’m not quite sure what#something about like hard work/effort/the need to be curious idk

the moral of the story is that a breathable atmosphere is important to one’s general well-being

[dykeisagender-deactivated202305]

one time i went through the taco bell drive thru and when i tried to order a baja blast i said “mountain boo bah” and then i just left. couldn’t recover

[getalittlemoreclosetome]

a friend of mine once went to order a beefy bean and cheese burrito but ordered a “beedo beedo” instead and i think of it every time i go to taco bell

[cali]

2018 tumblr post:

1: why do they call it a boner when theres no bone in it

2: there used to be

3: why does this sound so ominous

2025 tumblr post:

1: forward my shambling soldiers and slay without thinking. let blood flow into every crevice of this rotten land

2: yes my lady

3: yes my lady

[ivyroseiris]

I think leftists need to refer to the United States as a slave (nation) state more often. It has one of the highest prison populations per capita of any nation, slavery is legal as punishment for a crime, and Black people are disproportionately imprisoned and given longer sentences. The prison industrial complex is modern-day slavery

[fuzzy-oooze]

There's this really obscure forgotten DC hero named the Heckler, who's basically buggs bunny as a superhero, not having any powers or physically strong, but just really good at pissing people off until they accidentally deal with themselves.

Now they're interesting, but the REAL star of the show is one of his villains, John Doe the Generic Man, who's this guy in a stark white suit with flat pink unshaded, untextured skin with no features or anything who talks like chatGPT and has black text over his face that explains what he's feeling at the moment. That guy is fucking fascinating.