It would kill you to try? Javier Peña x female reader part.2
pairing: Javier Peña x Female Reader
summary: You joined The DEA three months ago & after spending most of those days doing calm investigation work at the office, it’s time to face the real danger and go undercover along with Peña and Murphy to follow one of Escobar’s sicarios’ journey. But something unexpected happens that changes the work relationship you have with Javier. And that indifference you used to have between each other seems to unravel into fire,prejudice and something deeper.
chapter/content warning: swearing (like a lot of it), mentions of blood and guns, mentions of prostitution, injuries. Angst, a lot of anger and dramaaaaa. Not really that loyal to the plot of the show.
english is not my first language so, sorry if you find any mistakes.
Weeks have passed since your little first expedition and along with that, your first exchange of an actual conversation with Javier Peña, that didn’t include monosyllables or office talk. Adding also Murphy in the picture, you have grown fond of the pair, exchanging more interactions and actually getting to know them better with every little mission you had to go through by their side.
Obviously, after that, Javier never said anything to Murphy or anyone at the office. But you could tell he had his quiet ways to protect you of posible risks and dangerous things, result of the expeditions you were assigned to make with them. Like for example, always positioning himself in-front of you, covering you like some sort of shield. And if Murphy goes first, he covers your back. Or the way he explains everything to you in the car before facing the situation. Like, who are you probably going to face, what to do if actual danger happens and how he’ll act if you get blocked or fail a step of the plan. He knew that has happened to you very often in the past, with cases you were really nervous about. Sometimes he kinda over dones himself and that has lead to small fights between you the two of you. You don’t like to feel fragile, and his silly methods of protection create that illusion in your head. It feels like you need to ask for his permission to make the next step. But he’s aware of your abilities. And most of the time, him and Murphy get really impress with your knowledge on the field.
The rest of the office also noticed that new closeness you both started growing. And that has also shape-shift the entire way some of them treat you. The guys stopped being such assholes and the jokes weren’t there anymore, at least not as often. You weren’t the ghost of the office anymore. They started to respect you and you could tell even some of them were a little intimidating by your presence. It bothered you that it took two other men’s approval for them to consider you somebody worth of respect. But that, unfortunately, was a common thing on a job like this. Some of the girls, on the other side, were a little jealous. And the ones that weren’t used you as some sort of source of information to get to Javier’s dating life or biography. Many questions were asked: “Is he seeing someone?” “What is he like?” “Does he treat you right?” “Do you find him attractive?” “Is he as committed in his job as he is at…you know”. Hello? Most of them you didn’t have the answer for. I mean, you barely even knew the man apart from the big rumors and his nicotine addiction. And somehow he knew how to keep those details in private to keep that mysterious aura surrounding him. It kinda made you sick to your stomach.
But you liked the fact that you didn’t know shit. You did not want to get your hopes down. At the end of the day, the man was nice to you. Polite. Not as nice as Murphy but he played the part. The same Murphy that greeted you at your arrival and shoved at you a copy of the newspaper, for you to read the most recent story about Escobar’s up to not good actions.
“Are you ready for another expedition, Gomez? Don’t worry, this time you’re staying in the car so we won’t have to act like your personal bodyguards, again” he joked with a side smile staring at you with his shiny blue eyes.
He always managed to noticed. And that made you a little nervous for some reason.
“Very funny, Murphy. Dismissing my job, again” you continued with the joke “I was expecting more of you, to be honest, I thought you weren’t like the rest” you crossed your legs in a seductive way, along with your arms.
“Oh, come on, baby. You know I’m better than these pricks” he gestured towards the other guys at the office who used do the same to you just weeks ago.
“Hey, Murphy, quit it” said one of the agents from their desks.
You and Murphy exchanged a smile and Peña was the next to show up in the room. Causing his obvious effect.
“Well, look who’s surprisingly showing early after another fun night” mention the same agent from before as Peña approached.
“Morning” he said to you in a calm tone, he did the same to Murphy and completely ignored the dude.
“What do you think about having such a life of the party as a partner, miss Gomez?”
Of course you were the one the question was directed to. You debated internally if answering was a good idea, ignoring it sounded appealing.
But your ego was stonger.
“Honestly? I don’t really give a fuck, Henry” you responded looking behind you to the subject’s eyes “I just focus on my job, unlike you.”
The room went silent except for Murphy’s big laugh. And Javier looked at you with a smirk on his mouth while sitting down on his chair.
“Yeah you should work on that, Henry” reassured between laughs another agent in the room.
Javier couldn’t help but laugh a little too and Murphy quickly joined him again. You started fake reading the newspaper, avoiding their stares but they couldn’t take them away from you.
“Could you not? I’m reading.”
They both rapidly went back to focus on the papers in their desks and murmured a funny ‘sorry’ trying really hard to contain their laughter.
They wouldn’t shut up about it for the whole day, and you knew.
The sound of a phone ringing started to smash the back of your head, feeling even more prominent by the second. You adjusted your eyes to the darkness of the room and lifted one arm trying really hard to reach the switch from the closest lamp next to your bed.
“¿Hola?” you answered in almost a whisper with the thought of it maybe being your mom, who still didn’t fully control the timezone of Colombia.
“Gomez.”Murphy answered in his American accent and that woke you up entirely “Sorry to wake you. Something happened, I need you here as fast as you can…” he explained in an anxious tone “I don’t know who else to call.”
“What? What happened?” you stood up quickly from the bed, causing you to blackout a little from the speed “Where’s Javier?”
“Just be fast, okay?” he hanged up after that.
Still feeling like in a dream state. You rapidly got ready and approached the location Murphy told you. The taxi dropped you off in the same exact building you three were, two weeks ago to be exact, following one of Escobar’s man. And it suddenly hit you as you hit the car’s door to close it. Javier wasn’t there, just Murphy and Carillo, waiting outside the car, two meters away from the building. Talking. Almost screaming to each other.
You approached them and Murphy immediately went to you. But he didn’t say anything.
You looked at him trying to find an answer, both agents couldn’t take their eyes of the ground.
“Is it Peña? It’s Peña, right?” Murphy ran his hands through his hair “Murphy!” you insisted in desperation.
“He fucked it up big this time” Carillo was the one to talk first. He looked really pissed and that almost took your breath away.
What the fuck did he do this time.
“Is he inside?” you tried again with Murphy, searching for his eyes. He looked like he was in some sort of trance and that made you even more nervous “Murphy! What the heck is wrong with you?!”
“Yes” Carillo talked for him again.
“They have him” Murphy finally gain the strength to talk “Escobar’s men.”
You couldn’t help but close your eyes and sigh.
“This motherfucker…” you murmured “What did he do? How the fuck is he inside?!”
You knew that wasn’t accidental. Nothing about Javier Peña seemed to be. He clearly put himself in that position and all of you knew that. What shocked you was that, he actually got caught this time. The DEA was gonna murder you if they found out. Worst. You could definitely get fired. That’s probably why you three were the only people there.
“Who called you?” you asked Carillo this time. You knew somebody have had to warned them about this. Some of the men Carrillo worked with had direct contact with these bastards. They probably called asking about some sort of reward in exchange for the information. That’s how fucked up everything was.
“They did” you took a step back “they say they’re willing to…negotiate.”
“Gomez…” called you out Murphy.
“We’re not doing that! We could get fired. We’re entering this building and we’re getting him out of there. Like we were taught.”
“Well that’s a beautiful speech. But we can’t. We don’t have the resources. We couldn’t even go after that motherfucker that day, there’s no way we’re entering that building with who knows how many armed men inside and hookers.” Murphy was fast at pinching your bubble.
“Hookers?! There’s hookers inside?!”
So the rumors were true. Oh, this motherfucker was unbelievable.
“Yes, hookers. It’s Peña we’re talking about, of course there’s freaking hookers inside” responded Carillo with a furious tone “or should I say, informants.”
“We need to call the office, get back up, we cou-”
You cut Murphy off before he could continued spilling what sounded like bullshit to you out of his mouth.
“We are not doing that” you repeated firmly “I’m not gonna lose my job because you two, bastards, can’t keep it in your pants and do what you’re told to” Murphy looked at you with guilt in his eyes.
You took your gun out of the inside of your jacket and charged it.
Neither Carillo or Murphy had a clue of what got into you, to actually wanna risks your life for someone like Javier. But you knew it wasn’t entirely about honor, but more about pride. He wasn’t protecting you this time. It was your turn to actually act like the agent you always wanted to be. Like that role was actually yours. Start acting up. Over doing it if it was necessary.
“I don’t know, Gomez. Let’s think about this.”
“You’re being such a pussy right now, Murphy” you quoted him to him, earning a sight from the man “Carrillo” you called.
Carrillo looked at you firmly.
“Are you in?” you asked hopeful.
Carrillo looked at Murphy and then at you. And sighed.
“Then cover my back” you said getting close to the entrance of the building. You turned your head towards Murphy “He’s never going to forgive you about this.”
You really didn’t want to say that to him. But you played all your cards in order to make him change his mind. You knew you were gonna need all the help you could get. You and Carrillo entered the building that looked like some sort of hotel. There was nobody there except for the receptionist who quickly gasped at you the second she spotted the guns you were holding.
“DEA” you explained, showing her your plaque and pressing one finger over your lips, indicating her to stay quiet.
She obeyed and kept silence. She didn’t look dangerous at all, you felt really sorry so many innocent people were involved in this bullshit. Slowly you turn into the stairs, making sure the coast was clear and gestured Carrillo to follow you up into the first floor of rooms.
“He’s really lucky to have you” whispered Carrillo referring to Peña in a sarcastic tone.
“If we get out of this, I’m changing partners.”
He tried not to laugh while following you down the corridor. You arrived to the first door, pressing your back to the wall, focusing on any sort of sound coming out of it. You didn’t hear anything. Before reaching for the doorknob, you noticed a thin thread of blood flowing out the room by the end of the door.
You swallowed. Suddenly the shaking of your hands became present.
“You want me to…?” started Carrillo noticing you were not moving.
You opened the door slowly.
A body was laying next to the bed, mattress and sheets covered in red. A long browned haired and fully naked woman was lying on the ground. You rapidly got on your knees and checked her pulse. None.
Your body was starting to lose the confidence of earlier. And it was starting to get hard to focus on your breath and ignoring the lack of oxygen entering your lungs. You freaking hated Peña for putting you through this. For putting this woman through this. For putting Carrillo through this and every single one of you. This wasn’t professional or brave of him. This was the most selfish act you’ve ever seen. Maybe he really was an asshole. Maybe he really didn’t deserve your respect. Maybe he didn’t deserve to be rescued.
“Gomez?” Carrillo called your name from the doorframe “Y/n” he repeated until you focused on him “I heard something, on the last room down the hall”.
You got out of the room trying really hard to not look back at the woman’s face. You focused on the noise. Sounded like someone complaining, someone wounded. A small ‘fuck’ coming out in a whisper.
“It’s him” you both said at the same time.
“Wait” Carrillo stopped you “let me go first.”
You looked at him with one eyebrow lifted.
“You’re loosing it, if he’s surrounded we gotta be quick” he explained.
“Shut up” you didn’t listen and walked past him, holding up your gun.
If someone had to accidentally shoot him, it was going to be you.
You two walked slowly making sure that if someone else was in the room with him, they wouldn’t hear you two coming. Once you were close you got ready, hands firmed on the gun, you looked at Carillo behind you and nodded.
You two pointed with the gun at the inside of the room. Javier was tied, both hands and ankles next to the window close to the bed. Sitting down on the floor looking tiredly at you. He’s hair was messy and he had a black eye, along with some wounds on his neck. Blood dripping from his lip.
He had never look more defenseless. And suddenly your anger was replaced with concern.
“Gomez?” he spoke softly.
You couldn’t bring yourself to answer.
“The coast is clear. There’s nobody in the room” mention Carrillo coming out of the bathroom.
You dropped to your knees, next to him. Untying him in a fast way. He murmured some words to you but you weren’t able to hear any of them. You called Carrillo and asked him to help you. Javier kept talking to you but you didn’t answer any of his questions, so he eventually gave up trying. It was like you were in automatic mode. You both dragged him out of that place, gaining some looks from the previous and still, traumatized, receptionist. And met Murphy waiting for you at the entrance, holding up his gun. Once he saw you, he quickly ran to the car to get it closer to where you were. You rested Javier on the passenger’s seat, and you joined Carrillo on the backseat.
Nobody talked on your way to the hospital. Neither of you could believe what just happened.
“He wants to see you” Murphy joined you in the waiting room. Thirty minutes passed before they finally let someone visit him.
“Is he okay?” you asked without looking at him.
“Yeah, he had some wounds on his chest but he was smart enough to wear his bulletproof vest so, he’ll be okay. The black eye though, looks gross.”
“Then I’m going home” you finally spoke standing up.
“Oh, come on, Gomez. You saved his ass.”
“I don’t need flattery. I need some sleep.”
Murphy stopped you, grabbing you by your shoulder.
“Look, he is in fact an asshole…but he was really worried. And I think he feels really bad” you rolled your eyes “If you talk to him, he might actually let you punch him in the other eye.”
Javier was sitting down on the hospital bed, neck and chest cover with bandages under his blood stained shirt that was wide open. A swollen eye and puppy stare redirected towards you, while you entered the place. It felt almost illegal to see him like this. So vulnerable, so far away from his tough image. The image he tried to implant in everyone’s mind. The image of a smart man. He looked more broken that smart. And still he managed to stand up.
“You good?” he asked like the last time he saw you cry after your mom’s call. A question that maybe you should be asking him instead.
“You look like shit” you spilled instead. Because before anything, you were mad at him.
He smirked a little “Well, you can’t always look like a heartthrob.”
You didn’t react to his comment.
“So are you gonna still renting hookers after this?”
He froze. He looked at you making sure that those words did actually left your mouth.
“It’s not what you think” he stated “and besides I don’t think is none of your business If I do.”
You were starting to regret entering that room.
“It is when it risks lives.”
“I wasn’t trying to risks any lives. I was trying to helped her.”
“You want a medal, Peña?”
“I’m being serious. What’s wrong with you?”
“What’s wrong with me?! What’s wrong with you?! You fucking idiot. You almost got us fired!” you exploited “When are you gonna start learning to cooperate, Peña? When are you gonna be responsible about your position?”
“You’re alive because of me. Because nobody wanted to enter that building, not even Murphy, let alone Carrillo. And I get it, I really get it, you don’t deserve someone risking their lives over you.”
He could tell that it was not only anger that was coming out if you, but raw honesty. Disappointment. He was used to causing that effect on people. He was the best at that. But he really hoped he wouldn’t cause that on you too.
So he really tried to change it.
“I’m sorry. But it’s really not what you think” he didn’t give up “She is one of my informants.”
You rolled your eyes remembering Carrillo’s words from before.
“Joder…I swear. I was there to rescued her, she called me. I know this woman. She’s a friend.”
“Oh yeah, a 'friend'. You frequent a lot of those.”
“She gave us the location of one of Escobar’s man.”
“Did Murphy knew?” you asked containing your desires to strangle him.
“Of course not.” he answered whining a little from his position “But they did.”
Your hands flew immediately to your face.
“I was the only resource she had, so she call me & I came and I don’t regret it.”
You took a step back, your back facing him this time. You really couldn’t look at him right now. You kept thinking, in some way, that woman died thanks to you. Thanks to him. He felt the same way. And in the process of trying to stop that from happening, he almost got himself killed. Along with the rest of you.
“You’re unbelievable” your murmured, facing him “You put the princess at risks and then you go and rescue her. That’s how it works for you.”
“Well, sometimes it’s the only way.”
“Did you know you’re a part of the problem? You’re paying for the same service, abusing the same power. The only difference is that they are fucking narcos and you’re a fucking cop. You should do the right thing, shouldn’t you?”
He stood up, angry. Getting closer to you. Mentioning his job, it felt like a personal thing now.You knew how to push the right buttons to piss him off. And like he taught you, you acted up, pushed them harder.
“What are you gonna do? Treat me like one of your whores?”
“You don’t know shit” he spat furious. Almost not vocalizing the words.
“I respected you” you ended “I thought it was mutual.” you got ready to leave him alone, before closing the door, you checked on him one last time “By the way, you failed. She’s dead.”