Hellloo everyone, daily reminder:
Please do not treat persecutors horribly! Treat your persecutors as you would treat any other alter
They might hurt you or your system sometimes, but don't act like you haven't once or twice either.
Let's start with "what is a persecutor?"
A persecutor is an alter who holds very bad emotions towards a certain event, or a person, such as ab/sers [u] or a dark time for your system.
Sometimes an alter will split to hold those events, those coping mechanisms and the like.
For example, if there was a dark depressive episode with a lot of SH occuring, there might be an alter who splits off to hold that.
"So why do they treat us so badly?"
As I mentioned before, persecutors hold forbidden negative emotions, similar to that of a trauma holder (many persecutors might be trauma holders as well)
[TW - Examples of: Transphobia, self-harm, fatshaming, disordered eating]
There's many reasons that a persecutor might do damage to the system. If a persecutor is holding memories and feelings towards transphobic ab/sers, for example, they might deadname and misgender you to try and "shape you up" to help prevent any more trauma related to being transgender.
Maybe a persecutor has self-destructive tendencies when they front. Just as you would a singlet, you don't know what they're going through unless they tell you (or you have low amnesia barriers lol). They likely just, hurt. They have a lot of emotional pain and have bad coping mechanisms that you don't like.
Maybe they're forcing themself and the system into disordered eating when they front, and they try to stop other alters from eating as well. What you might not know, is that they hold memories of people calling them fat and that they were overweight (even if they weren't overweight), they starve themself to try and stop that shaming from happening to themself or the system.
Think for a second, use your brain, or ask the alter who hogs most of the brain cells to really think for a second. Why are they doing this? What could they have experienced to make them act like this?
Think about a singlet, and why a singlet might be doing the things that your persecutors do.
Examine what your persecutor is doing, try to think of why they're doing it, then try to help them, things won't get much better if you don't.
"But they're all just so mean, they won't heal even if we tried."
That's just flat out wrong.
Sure there are some persecutors who might be all scary and whatnot, but there's also sweet persecutors, like Tyche in our system. There's persecutors that you probably wouldn't know was a persecutor, they wear all pastel and are shy. There's persecutors that seem completely "normal" that you might not even realize is a persecutor.
As for the "they won't heal", you don't know until you try. You have to reach out to them. You have to put in that effort.
"Then how do I fix them?"
They aren't broken. They don't need to be "fixed".
What they need is a support system. They need what any other person, alter, singlet or system would need, and that is support. That's the only way for them to heal and for your system to recover.
And to everyone who's stopping their persecutors from fronting, yelling at their persecutors, getting people against their persecutors, etc etc:
You are apart of the problem.
Your anger, hatred for that alter is about as damaging, if not, more damaging to the system than the alter who's been labeled "persecutor".
Let them front, don't be angry when they want to front. Just because they're a persecutor doesn't mean they don't deserve a chance to experience life.
Talk to that alter. Treat them like you would any other alter in any system. I don't care if they look a bit scary. I don't care what they've done to your system in the past. The only way for you and your system to heal, is to help your persecutors heal.
You and them don't have to be best of friends, but you do have to respect them.
I promise, things get better once you've helped them recover.
Sincerely, ex-host and persecutor Amès [they/them], and a persecutor [he/him] who wishes his name to stay private.
