we're all losers, here

Charlotte Charlie Rae MurrayEternal optimist and perpetual failure.I take tips in the form of jokes and smiles.

[charliemurrayx]

axellgray:

Sometimes, breakfast (or brunch) alone, or some time alone was needed. Sometimes he definitely needed to be away from everything surrounding him and to be alone. He also, definitely rather enjoyed his alone time when there was food involved.  He was distracted by the script he was reading, something his agent passed on for a potential pilot, when the waitress showed up at his side, and he had to smile up at her “I could only wish their was some sort of heist going on, very Oceans 8, by the way.” he shrugged a shoulder and placed the script down “As strongly disappointed as I am about the eggs, I think I’m feeling more pancakes and bacon today, anyway.” 

@charliemurrayx

“Maybe there is a heist and you just don’t know,” Charlie said, before tapping her temple and flashing him a knowing grin. “None of the guys had a clue what any of the girls were up to in Oceans 8. They were just the eye candy.” She wasn’t much of a movie goer, to be truthful, but having recently seen the heist movie, it had been all she’d spoken about, annoying some of her closer friends. With a chuckle, she tilted her head to one side. “You know they use eggs to make pancakes, right? You can say a lot of things about this place but you can’t say the food isn’t fresh - no pancakes until she comes back with the eggs.”

[charliemurrayx]

soniels:

         “So.. no eggs.” Sophie murmured to herself and burst into a laughter, “That’s fine, I can survive it. Can I get a black coffee and, uh, pancakes? Or do I have to wait for Marcia? Just kidding – please don’t spit in my coffee..” 

(( @charliemurrayx )) 

For a second, Charlie considered telling the girl that pancakes required eggs, but she was sure there was some sort of pancake mix that the chef would have. He had all sorts of time saving tricks up his sleeve. “I don’t spit in coffee,” she said, smiling brightly as she wrote down the order before, mischievous glint in her eye, she added, “I use drain cleaner.”

[charliemurrayx]

krisvalentine:

Easy grin curved Kris’ lips as the woman on the other side of the counter spoke. She pulled a face a sighed, shaking her head. “Shit. I was literally only here for a secret government mission or eggs. You’re kind of throwing off my entire day.” Kris teased, wrinkling her nose. “But I’ll settle for anything with the word lemon or poppyseed in it.” She finished, flashing the other a grin. 

“Well we’re all in for the secret government missions, but we can’t offer any out at the moment,” the blonde grinned clasping her hands together tightly. “Luckily for you, however, I can kill two birds with one stone. We have a lemon and poppyseed cake, made fresh this morning.” Cutting a large slice from the cake - and knowing she was probably to blame for any loss in profits the company made - she glanced up, “So whats your plans for today then? Busy day or people watching?”

[charliemurrayx]

levinkelly:

“Out of eggs?” he said in faux disbelief, leaning back in his booth in a conundrum. “Coffee it is. And a side of bacon.” Giving in, couldn’t help what and what wasn’t available. “If I was here to recruit you though, I’d like to think it’d be a lot cooler. Like Men In Black. I’d want to deal with aliens way more than the government.”

As Charlie wrote down the order that was impossible to forget, she struggled not to laugh. “Now you’re talking my kind of language,” she said, tearing off her page from the notepad before handing it back over to the cook through the back and returning her attentions to her customer. “I’d give anything to have one of those little zapper things that just wipe memories.”

[charliemurrayx]

artemisklein:

“Are you joking? Do I look like Rhianna to you?” she raised an eyebrow, letting out a sigh before waving her hand in the air. “Okay, fine. I’ll wait for the eggs. Bring me all the bacon that ten dollars can get me in the meantime.” Artemis told her, the munchies from her usual wake ‘n bake session hitting her as soon as Charlie had said the word ‘bacon’. “And then sit with me after. I can’t promise I’ll share but I definitely could use the company.”

“If I put one hand over my eye and sort of screw my other one up you could easily pass for a younger Julia Roberts though,” Charlie grinned, pointing at the other woman. Her request wasn’t all that unusual, to be honest, ‘all that ___ dollars can get me’ was definitely a popular move, but she hesitated over the company part. It was quiet, after all and it wasn't like she could get fired for giving a customer what they wanted, right? Calling in the order, she grabbed two black coffees before heading back to the table. “On the house,” she said, pushing one towards Artemis and taking a seat. “You’ll regret asking for company, just so you know.” She added with a grin.

[charliemurrayx]

griffinmontgomery:

“Mhm,” Griffin mumbled, not quite hearing what she actually said as he looked through the picture’s he’d taken. “You know, you’re a lot more graceful than you give yourself credit for.” He smirked, glancing up at her.

“Graceful?” Charlie replied, trying not to laugh. It certainly wasn’t a word she’d heard much in relation to herself but a compliment was a compliment and she wasn't one to turn one of those down. “Where were you when I was taking ballet lessons?” Pointing at the camera, she smiled, “Can I see?”

[charliemurrayx]

beabaxtr:

At least she wasn’t making a complete fool of herself here. Between her indecisiveness and poorly made jokes, Beatrice was positive that she’d be sick of herself had their positions been reversed. She managed a softer, more genuine smile while nodding. “Just black,” she echoed. She glanced back down to the menu, waving her fingers across it while adding, “I’ll try to make more sense of this and figure out the vegan thing by the time you’re back.”

Reaching across, Charlie knew she wasn’t supposed to overstep the mark and make customers uncomfortable - Lord knows her boss had told her that enough - but taking the menu from the dark haired woman’s hands, she turned it around. “Vegan options are on the back. And the gluten free. And a whole bunch of other stuff that isn’t quite vegan but is sort of getting there,” she grinned, before heading off. People always missed it. Once she’d sorted the coffee, she returned, almost bouncing on the balls of her feet. “So, have you decided? We do pretty great gingerbread waffles...”

[charliemurrayx]

rhiannonsandovalrp:

“Ew SOY MILK?” Rielle made the sign of the cross, shaking her head like she was hearing the dirtiest of sins. “First of all that name just irritates me. Milk comes from cows, it’s soy juice is what it is, not milk. Secondly just ew. I mean I can stand a bit of almond milk now and then, that shit can be good, but soy milk is just … it grosses me out as much as bubble tea.” She turned, shamelessly glancing at the man again. “I’m almost tempted to ask him.”

@charliemurrayx​

That was it for Charlie, who let out the most unladylike of snorts. The woman’s opinion was almost refreshing considering that it seemed every cafe, diner and restaurant had become over run with dairy and meat alternatives - sure, it was great that they could cater for all dietary requirements, but her own workplace had taught her that New York was less about dietary requirements and more about staying ‘fashionable’ with food. “I could never go vegan,” she said with a scrunch of her nose. “I couldn’t ever replace plain old cow’s milk. And cheese...the replacements are so rubbery. No. No soy milk for me.” With another sideways glance at the offending man, Charlie nodded. “Do it. I dare you,” she said in her best sing-song voice.

[charliemurrayx]

judenolans:

“Oh, honey,” Jude said with a shake of his head. “You greatly overestimate how much the law cares about pretty looks. I’ve witnessed it firsthand, I mean, if they can arrest this face,” he said, circling a finger around his jawline, “then anyone’s fair game. Okay, alright,” he sighed a little, glancing down at the plastic laminated menu. “In that case I’ll have a bagel, cream cheese, and coffee — black?”

@charliemurrayx​

“Dude, your face totally screams ‘I’ve swindled old ladies out of a ton of cash through a weird escorting scheme’ if you ask me,” Charlie grinned her own finger mimicking his movements. “If an old lady says some pretty boy took her money? I’m sending the cops your way, honey.” Scribbling down his order, she handed it through to the cook before turning her attentions to the coffee. “So, if you’re not here for some elaborate crime scheme, are you really telling me you’re just here for the bagels?”

[charliemurrayx]

masonsteinback:

The gym was a place that Mason spent much of his time – at first, it had all seemed overwhelming, but now that he’d been in the regular habit of it for over ten years, he couldn’t imagine not doing it. “Believe it or not, it actually becomes fun at a certain point. You start to embrace it all – it’ll give you more energy and make you look better. And– at this point, I’ve been doing this for so long that if I stopped and suddenly got fat and out of shape, people would look at me weird. There’s an expectation by now.”

@charliemurrayx

Charlie couldn’t help her eyebrows raise north as she stared on incredulously. If it hadn’t been for the free trial, she wasn’t even sure she would have come in the first place. Of course, she’d forgotten to cancel said trial and was now a good few months into paying for nothing which had led her here. Trying to get her money’s worth. “Is the certain point when I’m in the shower? I think that might be the best point,” she laughed stretching out her leg. “Don’t coffee and alcohol do those things too, though?” Still, she snorted when he mentioned growing out of shape - somehow, he was right. Even without knowing him, she couldn’t imagine him out of shape. “So, were you fat before? Is that why you came here?”

[charliemurrayx]

laylasandoval:

     What she felt then and there was smashing her face against the counter top she’d pictured many of times children scribbling on those cartoon crayon fill in place mats. All she wanted was freaking pancakes (and of course the bacon) instead slowly nodding and a tight blink that showed forever annoyance. “Of course…do it, Do it. I seriously need them right now.” Layla smiled along, her hangover doing it’s best making it a little more challenging to exude more of anything without pain, “Um, isn’t she like 007 or 001000years old or something? She’d allow it. She’d set it up.” 

With a small nod, Charlie wrote down the order - more because her manager demanded it than any real need - before turning back to the kitchen just enough that she could call for the pancakes and bacon without shouting down the building. Returning to the other woman, Charlie listened with a wide eyed stare. “She was James Bond?” the waitress replied, genuinely impressed. “I thought playing 007 was like being President - we all want it to be a woman but the old white dudes won’t let it happen.”

[charliemurrayx]

lyla-teague:

Lyla’s eyebrows ever so slightly creased together, pausing as her lips parted and her head tilted slightly to the side. “Why would that be? Do I have a secret agent look about me today?” Lyla said, glancing down at her clothes - she was wearing a denim coverall, sleeves and legs cuffed and belted. Trendy for the moment, and she had certainly thought it looked cute, but now she was questioning it. “Am I allowed to ask for something with eggs or…..would I have to wait for Marcia for that?” 

“You have that ‘I’m a badass and I’m recruiting you to join my group of badass women who are going to take down the government’ look,” she replied, hoping she hadn’t offended the other woman. She hadn’t missed that quick glance at her outfit. “It’s a compliment. Promise.” With a purse of her lips, the blonde shrugged, “I’d say you can order what you want - Marcia has to come back, she’s got the keys, and she has to have eggs so you’ll definitely get them. She just might be a bit - I think she has a thing for a doorman down the street.”

[charliemurrayx]

hollyxoxodavis:

“There’s a Hufflepuff edition too, it’s all yellow-gold and so beautiful,” Holly said, speaking as if she were describing Tiffany’s jewelry. “Yeah. I really shouldn’t, not when I dropped an obscene amount of money in Dior last week but…it’s someone’s birthday soon, right?” 

@charliemurrayx​

“I, uh, don’t think I’m in any position to drop that much on books,” Charlie laughed, thinking of how much she could buy with that sort of money. She’d always been dreadful with cash, of course, but even she had a line, somewhere. “Dior?” she repeated, eyes widening a little. “How much is obscene? I mean, if you can afford Dior, I don’t think these books will do too much damage, do you? I say go for it.”

[charliemurrayx]

beabaxtr:

Taking the vegan option was tempting – and very smart on BonBon’s part. Beatrice had only been to the restaurant a few times, unfortunately catching them during their bustling hours when her parents had last visited over the holidays, so she supposed the one brightside of this no eggs business was that she could familiarize herself with the menu. “Marcia isn’t the name of the chicken, is it?” She glanced back to the blonde, immediately realizing that her tone hadn’t been playful enough to pass off her attempted joke. “I’m kidding, sorry.” Beatrice shook her head quickly, the wrinkle tugging back between her brows. “I haven’t any caffeine yet today, so I’m like… – I’ll think about the vegan substitutes, though, definitely.”

Charlie looked back towards the fancily written ‘specials’ board that she had written up that morning - she knew there was some sort of vegan option that she probably should have memorised, but Charlie had never had the best memory and was, quite frankly, lucky she remembered to pay her phone bill, despite it happening the same day each month. When the other woman spoke, the waitress’s thoughts were interrupted and she snorted, loud and unladylike, at the other’s comment. “No, no that’s a good one - don’t apologise,” she replied, covering her face as though that could hide the snort that had escaped her. “How about I grab you some coffee while you decide - black?”

[charliemurrayx]

judenolans:

“What if I was recruiting you to commit crime? With a possible chance of capture and lifetime imprisonment?” Jude quipped back, raising a brow and smiling. He leaned against the counter, one elbow on it, whilst simultaneously stifling a yawn with the back of his hand. “So you mean to tell me egg-based food items are off the menu? I was kidding about the crime, but now I’m tempted to carry out a robbery of a farmer’s market.” @charliemurrayx

“Does this face look capable of crime?” Charlie asked, leaning on the counter with a chuckle. “There’s not a chance I’d get captured and no way a jury would convict me.” With a small roll of her eyes she swatted at him with her little orders notebook, “That’s usually what ‘no eggs’ means, yeah. But if you want to hold up a farmer’s market I’m pretty certain you could get there and back before Marcia brought some back from the store...I bet she’s got lost, again.”

[charliemurrayx]

rhiannonsandovalrp:

“Right? Thank you.” Rhiannon turned towards the blonde, always pleased when someone agreed with her. “This is why I could never work in like food service or any customer service where I had to look people in the eye. If I was that barista right now I’d be doubled over laughing at this bullshit.” She shook her head, glancing back towards the scene that had quieted slightly now that it seemed like he was getting a free coffee out of it. “And like … how sad must he be that out of all the things he could try and con people for he goes for coffee?”

@charliemurrayx​

Charlie tried not to laugh - working in the food service industry was supposed to have taught her not to open her mouth without thinking but, truth be told, it hadn’t, and she often found herself in situations much like the one the other woman had described. “I think that’s probably the hardest part - not even biting your tongue, just not laughing at these people. I once had a customer full on cry, stamping her feet and everything because our soy milk wasn’t at the right temperature...” With an eyeball, she shook her head, still in shock that she had actually dealt with it professionally. “I wonder if he does other things or if he just scams coffee...”

[charliemurrayx]

artemisklein:

“You’re so fucking strange,” Artemis laughed, resting her head on her chin. “You’re out of eggs? Well, shit, what do you make here that doesn’t have eggs? I tried going vegan for, like, a week, and it was horrible. You really don’t have eggs?”

“So I’m going to take that as you’re not here to take me off on some Ocean’s 8 mission?” Charlie smiled, before shaking her head and repeating the words, ‘No eggs.’ With a shrug, she grabbed the menu, “We can use egg substitutes for most of the things, but they’re not...they’re not really the same. We have bacon. Lots of bacon. And the bagels. And....anything off the left hand side of the menu. But personally? I’d wait like three minutes until Marcia gets her butt back here cause we really do have the best eggs in New York. When we have them,” she added as an afterthought.