not run by the intern

Want to make someone fall in love without being caught? Need help avoiding and/or deceiving magical associations that wish to monitor your every move? Ask us anything about how best to bypass the consequences of your magical misdeeds! (This account is legally run by a high ranking member of the C.I.A. and not the intern!)

[charm-and-illusion-association]

C.I.A. Official Page

ok the handbook for running a business blog says I need an introduction and classification in order to.... that's a lot of words. i'll just wing it I think. Boss can't afford to fire me. So, this is the Charm and Illusion Association. Heretics Everywhere, Ever Lasting didn't stick apparently. We know the sacred laws and methods of investigation very well and I'm legally not allowed to tell you why. We ask the important questions like "why do wizards exist when the only power you need is faith in the divine savior?" and "how do we best undermine higher authority in order to further our own sinful ambitions?". I had to memorize those for this job. I have to run this because Boss said "it is our sacred du" oh wait can I not say this publicly? Uh, because we want to help... charm people. and illusionize people. It's in the name.

so.

if a wizard needs help avoiding authorities or just other people in general I'm actually paid to help you do that. not enough to want to. just enough to do it.

or like, if anyone wants to just make conversation, I'm paid to sit here 10 hours a day I'd appreciate it. please.

[charm-and-illusion-association]

hey question, I’m not a wizard but how do I evade wizard taxes

oh, hello! so it's quite simple actually. your tax bracket is tied to your magical capacity and knowledge; in theory, as you benefit from wizarding social institutions such as wizarding libraries and wizarding therapy and wizarding interdimensional rehabilitation, you should become more efficient with your magic and money, and thus a greater percentage of your income is taxed to fund those institutions to help others. in essence, the more wizarding you do the more wizard taxes you have to deal with. so you can simply not be a wizard. but that is boring and i do not condone it. if you want to avoid taxes like a wizard reincarnation spells are a decent way to start from the bottom again. illusion spells are cool too. also spells of memory altering. i know a couple of people who even did identity theft. hope this helps! -a high ranking employee of the Charm and Illusion Association

[charm-and-illusion-association]

man i- *sniff*- wish i knew *hitCHOO* more wishard shpells than illushion *ahEM HAck* i could casht a wishard spell of shtoppin *Sound of the Unholy Plague of Spring* shpring allergies why hath i been forshaken.

[charm-and-illusion-association]

ran into a guy at the market. gave him my business card and he asked me how to make people believe you’re a demigod and illusion is my specialty i know so much about it

so i told him to come up with a good believable character design and to use a 2D illusion and simulate depth because it is easier than making a fully interactive illusion. recommended some books. “Deceit, Dishonesty, and Disillusionment” is a good one to start on illusion spells.

we talked over breakfast and also over lunch because i kept talking. and it just hit me. like three hours later. that i may have given advice to a cult leader. and my business card.

[charm-and-illusion-association]

hey so I just woke up early before boss did to practice my [Conjure Coffee] spell (he’s a strong advocate of normal coffee). the coffee itself is ok. could be worse. could be stronger.

but after conjuring the pot i learned i don’t know the [Conjure Cream and Sugar] spell so i have to run to the market. does anyone want anything is what i am trying to say.

[charm-and-illusion-association]

Hello, Charm and Illusion Association! For no reason in particular, say that a wizard left their wizard certifications in their wizard dwelling/lair/den/containment/etcetera etcetera etcetera. Would that still be acceptable if they were definitely-one-hundred-percent-a-wizard-and-not-at-all-an-alchemist and were very obviously such? Asking for a friend. Regards, A wizard (who is not an alchemist)

sorry i took a minute had to ask boss. apparently wizard certifications are null and void in the eyes of the divine savior? or something like that. i've never met the divine savior but boss says he's really important and if he is that important and he says it doesn't really matter it probably doesn't really matter so it should be totally fine that its in your friends wizard dwelling/lair/den/containment/etcetera i think.