My Name Is Ryan

Avid fan of anything that holds my attention. he/him.

[cherrystonefruit]

[dragongirlsweetie]

i just got shot with a puppy rifle but it didnt hurt me because im not a puppy

[aceynk]

me i just got shot by an elephant gun but im not even an elephant so im ok

[estrogenesis-vaporeongelion]

i just got shot with a 9mm handgun but i'm ok because i am taller than 9mm

[kunosoura]

hi! I'm a 9mm tall puppyphant and i'm excited to be here!

[puparachne]

[grimeclown]

I got a job at a gas station across from a casino and a guy keeps coming in to buy whole cartons of cigarettes and talks in the third person calling himself "snake eyes pete" and every time I tell him his total hes like "tell ya what if old Pete rolls a snake eyes why dont you give it to him for free?" and he rolls the same set of loaded dice on the counter and it does not matter how many times he rolls snake eyes I will not give him the cartons for free he gets so mad

[grimeclown]

Snakeyes Pete is from Toronto he gave me a button once that said "Canadians have the best luck" and i said i thought that was the Irish and he said "I fucking hate the irish" and i said okay

[hida-rite]

[winepresswrath]

Wei Wuxian: Has chronic memory problems that cause him to forget important information about both who is love with him and who wants him dead

Wei Wuxian: At most briefly met Jiang Cheng’s dogs one time over two decades ago before they were taken out of his sight and given away

Wei Wuxian: Needs only to meet a dog named Fairy to instantly recall that as a small child Jiang Cheng named his dogs Princess, Jasmine, and Love and develop an instant conviction deep in his soul that it is Jiang Cheng’s fault their nephew gave his dog a stripper name.

[coquelicoq]

[image description: distracted boyfriend meme. the boyfriend is labeled “wei wuxian’s memory,” the girlfriend is labeled “names and faces of people who want to kill him,” and the woman passing by is labeled “treasure trove of embarrassing childhood stories with which to make fun of younger brother.” /end id]

[cadencekismet]

Tags from @winepresswrath

[nebulations]

[ID: Tags that say, “#Wei Wuxian when confronted with Jin Zixun: what’s object permanence I don’t understand#Wei Wuxian on Jiang Cheng: here’s an itemized list of fifteen years of embarrassing behaviour#mind the appendix#I’ve filled it with stories I’ve gleaned from shijie#about the first ten years of your life. they are also embarrassing”. End ID]

[jin-hattori]

Tamaki chill

[samipekoe]

ukyo and ryoga the worsties

[aquanutart]

[cherrystonefruit]

I hate being told I look suspicious or sinister I fucking don’t you’re just mean.

[plumslices]

Petra Collins D'heygere cookie earring

[abkvs]

futbol torture nexus

[dogpuppy]

[horsefigureoftheday]

Horse figure of the day: Tokidoki Unicorno "Lil' Spikes"

[scarecrowbutch]

[leonardcohenofficial]

[cherrystonefruit]

For the past decade my neighbors have been trying to claim 2 feet of our backyard for basically no reason.

[gunsandfireandshit]